Needing someone to exchange thoughts on this.. - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

Brookef18 · 11-04-2006, 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Potter

I know I have to go out. I have been doing it since Siu Pao is here because I know he is happy when he goes out and I want him to be happy so I force myself to take him out few times each day. At certain days when I am feeling real down, I will at least bring him out once for about 30 mins so its good. Before I got him, I literally do not feel like going out at all. I will try the paper note thing..I will try everything suggested because I desperately want to get out of the blackhole! I think after all the talking, I am starting to realize something and that is I have to start with myself..within myself.

I'm so glad you shared how you were feeling. Not that easy to do when your in it! If you want to set up a time to chat we can do that too! My screen name is Brookef18 on AOL... you can chat with me over coffee!!! Don't try to get through this all by yourself! Every one here cares and knows how ya feel... I am glad to do what I can to get ya through this. it's not forever... you will feel better soon so don't get too down!

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yorkieusa · 11-04-2006, 07:05 PM

{{{{{{{hugs to you}}}}}}} It sounds like depression to me. Every one of us feels this way sometime or other. You are not alone. It may also be the time of year, too, so if you have the opportunity to get out into the sunlight, please do. Sunlight helps bunches. It's good for you and good for your puppy. You both desperately need that vitamin D.

I hope you start feeling better soon.

Potter · 11-04-2006, 07:10 PM

Thank you for the touch of kindness. I am so touched I am bawling. It did take me lots of courage to write it in a forum but I know I can't go on like this..i really can't. I find it easier to write it in a forum than to tell someone face to face because I start to find myself having the difficulty to talk to people and look them in the eye because I have this thought that they think that I am ugly and I am sure they find me snobbish and my english being funny because I have no slang at all.i guess when you don't have a job, your self-worth and esteem becomes a question.i feel better after everyone's kind words. Thank you so much. It really meant a lot to me.

Brookef18 · 11-04-2006, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Potter

Thank you for the touch of kindness. I am so touched I am bawling. It did take me lots of courage to write it in a forum but I know I can't go on like this..i really can't. I find it easier to write it in a forum than to tell someone face to face because I start to find myself having the difficulty to talk to people and look them in the eye because I have this thought that they think that I am ugly and I am sure they find me snobbish and my english being funny because I have no slang at all.i guess when you don't have a job, your self-worth and esteem becomes a question.i feel better after everyone's kind words. Thank you so much. It really meant a lot to me.

Oh my gosh... your gonna me start bawling!!! (It doesn't take much! Remember I'm an emotional artist!!!) I'm so glad we could all be here for you...Trust me I know how you feel!!!!

cheryl000 · 11-04-2006, 07:24 PM

Hey,
I know how you feel, I had to move to a strange city before when I joined the navy and I didn't have anyone. I also had communication apprehension like you seem to. It's where you want to say something, but don't because you feel scared to.
I think a great thing to do is to try a yorkie meetup group. That way you have something in common with everyone in the group just like here on YT. I found one in Toronto on the internet. I used to go to the San Diego one. You will meet so many people and I LOVED to see how different all the yorkies look. It also gives your little one the chance to socialize. I don't think there's a better icebreaker than to talk about yorkies! Plus, it will really get you out of the house and have something to look forward to. I really think that will help you out alot. I think it would be therapeutic for you to get into a meetup and maybe even help them by baking snacks or making things for the dogs on their birthdays. It will give you something to look forward to and a sense of accomplishment.
Also, if you feel like you've been depressed for a long period of time, don't be afraid to seek the help of a professional. They have found that many cases of depression come from a chemical imbalance in the brain. So some medicine can help and there is no shame taking medicine for it or seeing a professional. I really hope you feel better. I believe you have taken a brave first step by posting here. Have you been able to tell hubby about how you're feeling?
Below is a link for the yorkie meetup.
http://yorkie.meetup.com/cities/ca/on/toronto/

rox626 · 11-04-2006, 08:09 PM

All of the suggestions are very good and I hope following them will help you feel better. You sound depressed to me. Have you ever felt like this before? This may be a case of moving to a new place and feeling lonely or you may have a case of depression.

Not everyone manufactures enough serotonin in their brains. If after trying the suggestions of getting out and taking good care of yourself, you still find yourself depressed, it might help to see a doctor for some medication. There's nothing wrong with admitting you need some help. In the meantime, it's good you found this group. I'm in several and there are many people who have become very close even though they have never met in person. Please keep posting and let us know how you're doing.

Potter · 11-04-2006, 08:29 PM

Thank you for the support and encouragement. I have been struggling with it for some time but it wasn't this bad. I still could talk myself out of it but lately, its been getting out of hand...I have not talked to hubby seriously just some light hints and being him, I don't think he is much aware. I myself am not too sure which is it..whether it is moving to a new place and feeling lonely or it has been dragging so long that it is turning in to depression. I really have no idea what it is like. Just feels like sometimes it gets very suffocating and tiring and bone aching (which might be from carrying 7 pounds siu pao on the shoulder around or something else I am not sure either)..like I can't breath and I am not even working or having the stress from work! That is why I don't tell my hubby...I don't want to add to his stress or to make him think why I feel like that when I am at home with no job stress.I will try..if I can't I will sit hubby down and talk to him to get medication and help.I have to really try and make through this.

Miss_Sara · 11-04-2006, 11:16 PM

I COMPLETELY understand...
that's how I've been feeling for a while
people here are the same, I mean here no one is really friends, no one has close bonds or anything, it's all very superficial and full of deception, for a while that's really upset me. That's one of the reasons I really like YT too, like people are just friendly and helpful,and for a long time I just didn't know that in other places people were like that. I figured that everywhere was like my town.
Maybe you could join one of those community type classes? Something you want to learn like pottery or kickboxing maybe?!
I'm sorry that you feel like you can't talk to your husband, but I don't think you should feel guilty, if you're feeling this bad, I'm sure he would rather know then to think that you're fine...
I hope things get better for you, if you think you need to get help for depression, then you should definitly do that. but remember, you don't have to take the pills forever, once you start feeling better and it's easier to socialize and you find some friends, I suggest going off them... that is my personal suggestion because I've seen some bad effects of addiction to those sorts of pills, and also seen some amazing recovery from those pills.

Good luck hun! *hugs*

FlDebra · 11-05-2006, 04:33 AM

You have already gotten such excellent advice and support; but I just wanted to add one more thought. Schedule a physical with your doc. Sometimes there are physical causes for depression.

Thyroid troubles come to mind first. Before I found out I was hypothyroid, I was depressed, achey, and tired -- bone numbing tired! I had little interest in things and avoided socializing. I did not know why I was feeling so bad and the first doc only offered antidepressants. Finally another doc decided to do some tests and found the answer. There are lots of other physical conditions that can make a person more prone to depression too -- so a good physical could at least rule out something that might be easily treated.

I do hope you talk with hubby about this too. He may have more of an awareness than you think. Most of all I wish you well. Reaching out for support was a first step towards regaining your health.

red98vett · 11-05-2006, 05:17 AM

You guys did a brave thing posting....and hugs to you all -

I have an idea what you're going thru - I used to be very social ...to the point of being always on the go and had tons of friends....But now - I just have a few close friends ...but I just can't talk to them unless it's really trivial stuff...

I guess I don't want to depress THEM so i don't talk about how much my life changed (basically because my husband is so ill) .he's sick to the point of me feeling like I'm on deathwatch now and I know people really don't WANT to hear about that kind of thing - so I try not to talk about it....but some days it really REALLY gets to me.

My way of handling it is leaving the house as much as possible but then - I feel guilty .......When I'm here I want to be out... and when I'm out I feel like I should be home - (plus I miss the girls) so it's a catch 22.

Basically - I don't talk to ANYONE including my family about how bad things are so it just kind of eats me up. The girls are the biggest joy I have and I thank God for them everyday but it WOULD be nice to not be obsessed with my own future....it makes me feel really coldhearted to worry about the 'after he's gone' part of my life...

Being online has been a lifesaver for me - I can honestly say that I've met better people ONLINE than I've met in real life. True friends are very hard to find and after years of having lots of 'friends' now I can count on one hand the real ones....but the online people I've met win hands down as far as trying to be supportive and compassionate. There's so many people i wish I could meet for real - and that's kind of depressing too - why do they all have to be scattered across the country ! lol -

so to you guys who need a shoulder - keep talking online - you'll be surprised at how many really nice people you'll meet and one day who knows - you just may hook up with someone in your own town.....I know that isn't a big help but it's helped me when I get down...

Potter · 11-05-2006, 06:26 AM

Hi Villette,

I was aware of your situation but I didn't know how you are taking it because you usually sound really cheerful. Its good that you are opening up to us too. As for you mentioning people DON'T WANT to hear about that kind of thing, real friends will understand. If they are always hanging around you and asking you questions, you know they want you to talk to them more than just the average trivial stuff. I do hope there is someone like this around you. If there is, try not to shut them off. Try to reach out. If there isn't, come to YT like I did...I never regret posting the thread now. You can always PM me also. I do understand the part about a deathwatch. Somehow, I think you have to talk about it be it online or to one of your friends. Usually, women fare better when they talk about stuffs.

Here is my favourite quote from the Bible.
"Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" --Matthew 6:34

I know saying is easy than putting it in to action and an unknown future is always scary but there will always be a future and that hope will keep you going.

Saleswman · 11-05-2006, 06:48 AM

I used to sell medications for anxiety and depression. You may need to seek the advice of your doctor. Depression is caused by low levels of seratonin in the brain. It is a physical disorder.....

I would not use the med as a crutch.....I would see if I could find a good counselor....like at church or something......I found it very helpful when I was going thru my divorce years ago.....and I did not get meds either....but only you and your doctor can decide that......

It may be more than just not having any "friends". It could be a hormone issue too.....you never know.

But, while you are dealing with it.....we all are here for you......

doortego · 11-05-2006, 06:48 AM

That is so strange that you should say you want to talk about your situations but don't . I, for one, have been very curious about your situation. I think if you post your true feelings, you will find others in the same boat. Last year, my husband went in to get a refill on some meds and ended up in the hospital diagnosed with congestive heart failure, 3 aneurysms, etc. etc. We literally spent the whole summer at St. Luke's in Houston. Not our idea of a fun summer vacation. He ended up with 3 tries to correct the aneurysm and still has repairs that need to be made if possible. He had a pacemaker/defibrillator put in and is tired all the time. This all happened right after I retired thinking now we could travel and enjoy some of that saving for retirement we had done our whole life. You feel kind of kicked in the teeth when you did without things your whole life saving for this wonderful retirement that you are now not healthy enough to do.

I kind of have a theory about why we are able to post so openly. We don't tell our friends because we are scared we will scare them away if we get too real with our feelings. This is an anonymous way of spilling our guts and if we don't like the replies, we just don't log on or if we do, we ignore the ones we don't like.

Also, I have a feeling that you are not willing to tell people how you feel because you are trying to be strong for your husband and don't want to appear selfish to others. Hey, if you are not concerned about what comes after, who is going to be?

I don't see it as selfish but wise. Perhaps it would even be irresponsible to not make preparations for your future. I do believe that all of my future is in God's hands and he will take care of me but sometimes, I'd like to see the outcome.

Oops, here I am writing another book.

Quote:

Originally Posted by red98vett

You guys did a brave thing posting....and hugs to you all -

I have an idea what you're going thru - I used to be very social ...to the point of being always on the go and had tons of friends....But now - I just have a few close friends ...but I just can't talk to them unless it's really trivial stuff...

I guess I don't want to depress THEM so i don't talk about how much my life changed (basically because my husband is so ill) .he's sick to the point of me feeling like I'm on deathwatch now and I know people really don't WANT to hear about that kind of thing - so I try not to talk about it....but some days it really REALLY gets to me.
My way of handling it is leaving the house as much as possible but then - I feel guilty .......When I'm here I want to be out... and when I'm out I feel like I should be home - (plus I miss the girls) so it's a catch 22.

Basically - I don't talk to ANYONE including my family about how bad things are so it just kind of eats me up. The girls are the biggest joy I have and I thank God for them everyday but it WOULD be nice to not be obsessed with my own future....it makes me feel really coldhearted to worry about the 'after he's gone' part of my life...

Being online has been a lifesaver for me - I can honestly say that I've met better people ONLINE than I've met in real life. True friends are very hard to find and after years of having lots of 'friends' now I can count on one hand the real ones....but the online people I've met win hands down as far as trying to be supportive and compassionate. There's so many people i wish I could meet for real - and that's kind of depressing too - why do they all have to be scattered across the country ! lol -

so to you guys who need a shoulder - keep talking online - you'll be surprised at how many really nice people you'll meet and one day who knows - you just may hook up with someone in your own town.....I know that isn't a big help but it's helped me when I get down...

Piccolo's mom · 11-05-2006, 07:14 AM

Potter,

I am really hurt very badly just now. I had no idea about your depression or feeling lonely here, in Canada, when I first contacted you a few times and invited you to visit me and Piccolo. I even gave you my telephone #, directions to my house and locations of a go-train. I kept saying how much I wanted to meet you and your baby. And it was a few weeks ago. You never came , never called me and now I am reading how sad you are not having any friends to talk to. It really doesn't add up. If somebody offers you her/his frienship and you ignore it - you'll be alone no matter what.
I also told you that I have a beautiful parklike area around my house and we could take our babies there to have lots of fun. And since you take your puppy for a walk everyday, I thought it'll be fun for all of us.

I wish you all the best and try to think about what I wrote.

gypsyqueen · 11-05-2006, 07:44 AM

Honey thats called depresion a chemical imbalance there now linking this to all the chemicals in our food a few months on meds your as good as new your not alone 1 in 3women have this.

11-04-2006, 07:05 PM	#17
yorkieusa Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 21,173	{{{{{{{hugs to you}}}}}}} It sounds like depression to me. Every one of us feels this way sometime or other. You are not alone. It may also be the time of year, too, so if you have the opportunity to get out into the sunlight, please do. Sunlight helps bunches. It's good for you and good for your puppy. You both desperately need that vitamin D. I hope you start feeling better soon. __________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel

11-04-2006, 07:10 PM	#18
Potter YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 2,583	Thank you for the touch of kindness. I am so touched I am bawling. It did take me lots of courage to write it in a forum but I know I can't go on like this..i really can't. I find it easier to write it in a forum than to tell someone face to face because I start to find myself having the difficulty to talk to people and look them in the eye because I have this thought that they think that I am ugly and I am sure they find me snobbish and my english being funny because I have no slang at all.i guess when you don't have a job, your self-worth and esteem becomes a question.i feel better after everyone's kind words. Thank you so much. It really meant a lot to me. __________________ http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?j=t&i=410379 "No matter how little money and how few possesions you own, having a dog makes you rich."

11-04-2006, 08:29 PM	#22
Potter YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 2,583	Thank you for the support and encouragement. I have been struggling with it for some time but it wasn't this bad. I still could talk myself out of it but lately, its been getting out of hand...I have not talked to hubby seriously just some light hints and being him, I don't think he is much aware. I myself am not too sure which is it..whether it is moving to a new place and feeling lonely or it has been dragging so long that it is turning in to depression. I really have no idea what it is like. Just feels like sometimes it gets very suffocating and tiring and bone aching (which might be from carrying 7 pounds siu pao on the shoulder around or something else I am not sure either)..like I can't breath and I am not even working or having the stress from work! That is why I don't tell my hubby...I don't want to add to his stress or to make him think why I feel like that when I am at home with no job stress.I will try..if I can't I will sit hubby down and talk to him to get medication and help.I have to really try and make through this. __________________ http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?j=t&i=410379 "No matter how little money and how few possesions you own, having a dog makes you rich." Last edited by Potter; 11-04-2006 at 08:32 PM.

11-05-2006, 04:33 AM	#24
FlDebra Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: FL Posts: 7,651	You have already gotten such excellent advice and support; but I just wanted to add one more thought. Schedule a physical with your doc. Sometimes there are physical causes for depression. Thyroid troubles come to mind first. Before I found out I was hypothyroid, I was depressed, achey, and tired -- bone numbing tired! I had little interest in things and avoided socializing. I did not know why I was feeling so bad and the first doc only offered antidepressants. Finally another doc decided to do some tests and found the answer. There are lots of other physical conditions that can make a person more prone to depression too -- so a good physical could at least rule out something that might be easily treated. I do hope you talk with hubby about this too. He may have more of an awareness than you think. Most of all I wish you well. Reaching out for support was a first step towards regaining your health. __________________ FlDebra and her ABCs Annie, Ben, Candy Promoting Healthy Breeding to the AKC Yorkshire Terrier Standard

11-05-2006, 05:17 AM	#25
red98vett Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Houston TX Posts: 33,590 Blog Entries: 1	You guys did a brave thing posting....and hugs to you all - I have an idea what you're going thru - I used to be very social ...to the point of being always on the go and had tons of friends....But now - I just have a few close friends ...but I just can't talk to them unless it's really trivial stuff... I guess I don't want to depress THEM so i don't talk about how much my life changed (basically because my husband is so ill) .he's sick to the point of me feeling like I'm on deathwatch now and I know people really don't WANT to hear about that kind of thing - so I try not to talk about it....but some days it really REALLY gets to me. My way of handling it is leaving the house as much as possible but then - I feel guilty .......When I'm here I want to be out... and when I'm out I feel like I should be home - (plus I miss the girls) so it's a catch 22. Basically - I don't talk to ANYONE including my family about how bad things are so it just kind of eats me up. The girls are the biggest joy I have and I thank God for them everyday but it WOULD be nice to not be obsessed with my own future....it makes me feel really coldhearted to worry about the 'after he's gone' part of my life... Being online has been a lifesaver for me - I can honestly say that I've met better people ONLINE than I've met in real life. True friends are very hard to find and after years of having lots of 'friends' now I can count on one hand the real ones....but the online people I've met win hands down as far as trying to be supportive and compassionate. There's so many people i wish I could meet for real - and that's kind of depressing too - why do they all have to be scattered across the country ! lol - so to you guys who need a shoulder - keep talking online - you'll be surprised at how many really nice people you'll meet and one day who knows - you just may hook up with someone in your own town.....I know that isn't a big help but it's helped me when I get down... __________________ Villette, Chanel & Cheri www.DesignsByVillette.net Custom Address Labels and Note Cards using YOUR Photos! Just Click HERE!

11-04-2006, 07:24 PM	#20
cheryl000 YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: none Posts: 1,495	Hey, I know how you feel, I had to move to a strange city before when I joined the navy and I didn't have anyone. I also had communication apprehension like you seem to. It's where you want to say something, but don't because you feel scared to. I think a great thing to do is to try a yorkie meetup group. That way you have something in common with everyone in the group just like here on YT. I found one in Toronto on the internet. I used to go to the San Diego one. You will meet so many people and I LOVED to see how different all the yorkies look. It also gives your little one the chance to socialize. I don't think there's a better icebreaker than to talk about yorkies! Plus, it will really get you out of the house and have something to look forward to. I really think that will help you out alot. I think it would be therapeutic for you to get into a meetup and maybe even help them by baking snacks or making things for the dogs on their birthdays. It will give you something to look forward to and a sense of accomplishment. Also, if you feel like you've been depressed for a long period of time, don't be afraid to seek the help of a professional. They have found that many cases of depression come from a chemical imbalance in the brain. So some medicine can help and there is no shame taking medicine for it or seeing a professional. I really hope you feel better. I believe you have taken a brave first step by posting here. Have you been able to tell hubby about how you're feeling? Below is a link for the yorkie meetup. http://yorkie.meetup.com/cities/ca/on/toronto/

11-04-2006, 08:09 PM	#21
rox626 YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: New Jersey Posts: 328	All of the suggestions are very good and I hope following them will help you feel better. You sound depressed to me. Have you ever felt like this before? This may be a case of moving to a new place and feeling lonely or you may have a case of depression. Not everyone manufactures enough serotonin in their brains. If after trying the suggestions of getting out and taking good care of yourself, you still find yourself depressed, it might help to see a doctor for some medication. There's nothing wrong with admitting you need some help. In the meantime, it's good you found this group. I'm in several and there are many people who have become very close even though they have never met in person. Please keep posting and let us know how you're doing.

11-04-2006, 11:16 PM	#23
Miss_Sara And Tila, too! Donating Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Cali Posts: 620	I COMPLETELY understand... that's how I've been feeling for a while people here are the same, I mean here no one is really friends, no one has close bonds or anything, it's all very superficial and full of deception, for a while that's really upset me. That's one of the reasons I really like YT too, like people are just friendly and helpful,and for a long time I just didn't know that in other places people were like that. I figured that everywhere was like my town. Maybe you could join one of those community type classes? Something you want to learn like pottery or kickboxing maybe?! I'm sorry that you feel like you can't talk to your husband, but I don't think you should feel guilty, if you're feeling this bad, I'm sure he would rather know then to think that you're fine... I hope things get better for you, if you think you need to get help for depression, then you should definitly do that. but remember, you don't have to take the pills forever, once you start feeling better and it's easier to socialize and you find some friends, I suggest going off them... that is my personal suggestion because I've seen some bad effects of addiction to those sorts of pills, and also seen some amazing recovery from those pills. Good luck hun! hugs

11-05-2006, 06:26 AM	#26
Potter YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada Posts: 2,583	Hi Villette, I was aware of your situation but I didn't know how you are taking it because you usually sound really cheerful. Its good that you are opening up to us too. As for you mentioning people DON'T WANT to hear about that kind of thing, real friends will understand. If they are always hanging around you and asking you questions, you know they want you to talk to them more than just the average trivial stuff. I do hope there is someone like this around you. If there is, try not to shut them off. Try to reach out. If there isn't, come to YT like I did...I never regret posting the thread now. You can always PM me also. I do understand the part about a deathwatch. Somehow, I think you have to talk about it be it online or to one of your friends. Usually, women fare better when they talk about stuffs. Here is my favourite quote from the Bible. "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" --Matthew 6:34 I know saying is easy than putting it in to action and an unknown future is always scary but there will always be a future and that hope will keep you going. __________________ http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?j=t&i=410379 "No matter how little money and how few possesions you own, having a dog makes you rich."

11-05-2006, 06:48 AM	#27
Saleswman Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Tennessee Posts: 1,643	It may be time...... I used to sell medications for anxiety and depression. You may need to seek the advice of your doctor. Depression is caused by low levels of seratonin in the brain. It is a physical disorder..... I would not use the med as a crutch.....I would see if I could find a good counselor....like at church or something......I found it very helpful when I was going thru my divorce years ago.....and I did not get meds either....but only you and your doctor can decide that...... It may be more than just not having any "friends". It could be a hormone issue too.....you never know. But, while you are dealing with it.....we all are here for you......

11-05-2006, 07:14 AM	#29
Piccolo's mom Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Mississauga, Ontario, Canada Posts: 778	Potter, I am really hurt very badly just now. I had no idea about your depression or feeling lonely here, in Canada, when I first contacted you a few times and invited you to visit me and Piccolo. I even gave you my telephone #, directions to my house and locations of a go-train. I kept saying how much I wanted to meet you and your baby. And it was a few weeks ago. You never came , never called me and now I am reading how sad you are not having any friends to talk to. It really doesn't add up. If somebody offers you her/his frienship and you ignore it - you'll be alone no matter what. I also told you that I have a beautiful parklike area around my house and we could take our babies there to have lots of fun. And since you take your puppy for a walk everyday, I thought it'll be fun for all of us. I wish you all the best and try to think about what I wrote. __________________ Barb & Piccolo If your dog barks and doesn't fit in a bread roll, don't eat it.

11-05-2006, 07:44 AM	#30
gypsyqueen Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Las Vegas. Posts: 955	call a doctor Honey thats called depresion a chemical imbalance there now linking this to all the chemicals in our food a few months on meds your as good as new your not alone 1 in 3women have this.