Opinions Needed!!

[Rem&Silkmom]

I think that the important thing is if is bothers YOU than he respect that. If you were doing something that bothered him and he came and told you...would you stop? Maybe it is a control thing with him.

My husband does not look at them but if he did I think it would bother me. I think that it might effect my self esteem. I would be wondering why he needed that...is he missing something? I don't buy the article thing...there are plenty of other magazines to read for the articles.

I think he should respect your wishes.

[lisatodd]

ok...here is my opinion.....i think it is how the men handle it. i had three x-boyfriends who both read the mag. one who could not handle it very well and spend time alone with the mag(if you know what i mean ) then the other two it was fine. it didn't bother me a bit. all i know is they were much better lovers when they had read the mag and i don't complain at all. now my husband does not read the mag at all but at least 3 times a year he and his friends will go to the ladies club and when he does, i cannot wait for him to come home because i know we will have a GREAT night.
ok....there it is...all out in the open.

[Nikko's_human]

I agree with most women on here that if it makes you feel uncomfortable, then your husband should respect your feelings and lay off the magazines. My husband does not buy them, but he does glance at internet porn on occassion. It bothers me and I have told him so but he doesn't really do it that often and he won't do it in front of me. It is really about respecting your partner's feelings and not so much about insecurity. We know our husbands love us and are attracted to us, otherwise why would they be with us? The issue is that we don't understand why they need to look at these things when they have beautiful, sexy wives at their disposal . Someone hit it right on when they said that men are more visual than women.

[daisysis]

Originally Posted by Rem&Silkmom

I think that the important thing is if is bothers YOU than he respect that. If you were doing something that bothered him and he came and told you...would you stop? Maybe it is a control thing with him.

My husband does not look at them but if he did I think it would bother me. I think that it might effect my self esteem. I would be wondering why he needed that...is he missing something? I don't buy the article thing...there are plenty of other magazines to read for the articles.

I think he should respect your wishes.

This is a great answer:

[Kelz]

If it bothers you..then he should quit...my boyfriend subscribes to playboy..but it doesnt' bother me..he basically reads it..then throws it in a pile...

[Yorkease]

OK! I REALLY have to chime in on this one.

First let me say: my husband is not into that. (we are personally sick of seeing close to that stuff on regular TV shows. I have to monitor my son's cartoons now.)

I agree that if it bothers you then he SHOULD STOP. I also agree with what Villette said. "Men can be so DUMB" Some act like they have never see a ta-ta (boob) before. Really guys!

I personally don't think it's YOU that is insecure! It bothers you and understandably so. Some men can act like they really stand a shot with those women in those magazines. You could try walking by the next time he's looking and say: "humm, wonder what her boyfriend looks like?" or "Didn't that one used to be a man?" that one would have to ruin any mental images, or one of my favorites that my husband used to say "Her biggest fear has to be a needle because if that thing popped it would be a flood of silicon!" LOL!

Anyway you handle it don't feel bad about yourself. HE is NOT a reflection of you. You are human and you deserve to be treated like one. Good luck.

[yougetthesmiles]

I really appreciate all your input.
The good thing is, he don't do it in front of me, I'm not sure if that makes it any better or not. the point is I dont understand why any man likes to look at that trash, I guess I could see it if they are single, but were not and it's not like we have a bad sex life, cause thats def not the issue, I mean come on guys, I'm 30 and at my peak here lol but anyways, I think it's a guy thing but I wish it wasent my guy!

I'm going to show this to him, please keep the opinions coming. Thanks again!

[YORKIE7]

I just spoke to my partners friend. He likes porn a lot although he is married. He says that he fantasizes about things with the girls in those mags.......

But its fantasies of things that he wouldnt want to do with his wife, because he respects her. This is quoted from him....

'' i want to make to love to my wife,the mother of my children. With the girls in porn mags i like to fantasize about hardcore sex that has no feelings envolved, its just mindblowing dirty sex''

He does say though, that if his mrs didn't like it, he would stop buying porn for her

[yougetthesmiles]

Originally Posted by YORKIE7

I just spoke to my partners friend. He likes porn a lot although he is married. He says that he fantasizes about things with the girls in those mags.......

But its fantasies of things that he wouldnt want to do with his wife, because he respects her. This is quoted from him....

'' i want to make to love to my wife,the mother of my children. With the girls in porn mags i like to fantasize about hardcore sex that has no feelings envolved, its just mindblowing dirty sex''

He does say though, that if his mrs didn't like it, he would stop buying porn for her

I dont know what to say about that one! I would not put up with my husband having a mental affair like that, I find that very disrespectful to his wife, and she is ok with this? I just dont think I could handle that one.

[YORKIE7]

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

I dont know what to say about that one! I would not put up with my husband having a mental affair like that, I find that very disrespectful to his wife, and she is ok with this? I just dont think I could handle that one.

I couldn't handle that either, his wife doesnt mind in the slightest,she doesnt get jealous or even batter an eyelid. I think its strange as isn't jealousy a natural emotion that you get one you love someone its baffled me!

[DENISE517]

My hubby doesnt buy these but I know the guys he works with buys them and keep them in the bathrooms there. (gross lol) He knows this type of stuff is not welcome in our home and he knows I dont approve of it. He has never brought one home, but I'm not stupid. I'm sure he looks at them at work (thats my guess) He knows how I feel and respects that and therefore we wouldnt do it. I also dont like the whole titty bar thing. He never goes to bars so I dont have to worry about that. His boss was getting married a few years ago and they were taking him out and going to a titty bar here in town. Hubby said the guys at work were giving him a hard time about not being able to go. I was thankful that he respected my decision about that and I told him he could go ahead and go... Oh course he didnt try and talk me out of it.. LOL It was just a one time thing and I wasn't worried about it. He was only gone a few hours. Some of the women at those places are nasty and gross.. hahaha. I dont think its bout being an insecure person... Its about being MARRIED... When you decide to take on the oath to get married you also know that you can no longer do some of the things you use to do. If men are single and they want to look at these, then go for it.

I see how you feel and I think he should respect your decision. I need to lose weight too and I am insecure to a certain extent, but My hubby knows this too and he wouldnt want to make me feel worse. Plus he would be in the dog house.... and I would have to hold out!!!! LOL LOL

[Lexi Rae]

i think it would bother me if my husband bought and read those magazines, but i would go out and get play girl and look at them.. im sure he wouldnt like that.. im really sure of that..

[sashajade]

i think the one thing we are missing here is the fact that men are well how should i put it? easy to please and not as bright as women, if a woman looked at a playgirl mag she would be making up storys in her head about what he was like how he sounded were they would have sex and all that he would nearly end up being a real person and we would of prob even picked a job for him and how much he had in the bank but with a man he just looks at the pretty pics lol she hasnt got a name he dont know were they have sex to him she just has lady bits that are not his wifes or girlfriends, to put it bluntly if you feel in the mood and your partner dont then women go off by there self and can use there mind and maybe some toys to get them going but men cant they need pics something simple they dont need to think about lol. i can understand why you dont like it and as he knows you dont he should stop it.

[yorkieangel]

Oh MY... It SO WOULD NOT GO OVER WELL at my home. I should say it would not go over AT ALL!!!
I'm thinking that KNOWING it hurts you and he still keeps doing it is not only disrepectful.. but shows he has a problem. reminds me of when an alcoholic says he can stop ANYTIME he wants ...but doesn't WANT to

[Kenzies Grandma]

My husband and I have been married for 35 yrs so needless to say I don't look like any of the girls in these magazines or on internet sites. However I also have to say that I don't need to worry about it because both my husband and I have the same view of marriage. And that is that the only one whom we want to have those kind of thoughts about are each other. It is definitely a case of love and respect, your husband should love you as he does himself and I can't really see most men being OK with their wives fantasizing about someone else. If you don't have trust, love and respect in your marriage it will never last against all the pressures that our world puts on it. Just my opinion, but I would have a serious talk with your husband so he knows how it makes you feel, and at the same time ask him how he would feel about you doing the same. Remember you both promised to love and honor each other. Ok, lol, I'll get off my soapbox now. (I just really think that there would be a lot less divorce if people really tried to live up to their vows instead of thinking of themselves first).