Can i ask a question..... - Page 7 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

ytsirk27 · 02-15-2006, 01:24 PM

[QUOTE=BabyFidgette]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ytsirk27

I just noticed you're my age. I hope everything works out for you.

Just remember, we woman are strong and stick together.

Actually my number is wrong...i have had this name for 2 yrs and havent changed it. I turned 29

Feb 2nd. But your right...we all need to stick together!

BabyFidgette · 02-15-2006, 01:47 PM

[QUOTE=ytsirk27]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyFidgette

Actually my number is wrong...i have had this name for 2 yrs and havent changed it. I turned 29

Feb 2nd. But your right...we all need to stick together!

I'm 29 too. Don't know if that's a bad or good thing!!

ytsirk27 · 02-15-2006, 01:48 PM

[QUOTE=BabyFidgette]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ytsirk27

I'm 29 too. Don't know if that's a bad or good thing!!

how you know I was 29???

BabyFidgette · 02-15-2006, 01:49 PM

I know what might make you feel better....you have any pictures of your Yorkie? I can make you an avatar if you'd like. Not as great as others, but I'm learning.

Just let me know!

bchgirl · 02-15-2006, 01:52 PM

[QUOTE=ytsirk27]

Quote:

Originally Posted by bchgirl

I understand what your saying but I paid for this house and i have 2 kids and all their stuff that i gotta get settled. It easier for him to take his clothes right now and just go until I figure out if im keeping this house or not. I am not trying to be difficult or hateful but he has somewhere to go and I dont besides having to pay the payment on this house pretty much since we have had it I, yes me, should beable to stay in it until i figure out what im doing. not only besides that, I workl out of my house doing daycare if i leave now...so does my income!

I understand your reasoning, be prepared, the courts may not agree. If his income is/was used for payments or upkeep, he has a claim against the house, even if it's ONLY in your name. If your decision is to dissolve the marriage, I'd visit an attorney pronto.

BabyFidgette · 02-15-2006, 02:05 PM

[QUOTE=ytsirk27]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyFidgette

how you know I was 29???

You're profile.

ytsirk27 · 02-15-2006, 02:07 PM

[QUOTE=BabyFidgette]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ytsirk27

You're profile.

hehe...im kinda slow!! My brain gets easily confused!!!

BabyFidgette · 02-15-2006, 02:08 PM

[QUOTE=ytsirk27]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyFidgette

hehe...im kinda slow!! My brain gets easily confused!!!

No prob. So how bout that avatar?

ytsirk27 · 02-15-2006, 02:18 PM

[QUOTE=BabyFidgette]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ytsirk27

No prob. So how bout that avatar?

what about it??

BabyFidgette · 02-15-2006, 02:23 PM

[QUOTE=ytsirk27]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BabyFidgette

what about it??

Look at the post I wrote a few up. I said that if you want I'd make you an avatar if you have pictures to make you feel a little better.

Tiggerwit · 02-15-2006, 04:17 PM

This is tough. First of all I'd like to say that I haven't read everyone's advice and remember that our experiences and such may not necessarily be what's right for you, only you can make that decision. I also do not know the full extent as to why you feel the way you do. But from my experience I think you need to talk to him. I think it's important to be honest about your feelings. You may be surprised that he may be feeling the same disconnection and just didn't know how to say anything.

I was married for 15 years and felt disconnected for several years. I was was so scared of being alone that I just couldn't bring myself to say anything to my husband. I had two little girls also to think about. I tried to ignore it and things got worse. He pushed me away and started living another life so to speak, opened his own account, didn't want to tell me where he was, etc. I was making myself physically sick. I finally just did it. I told him I wasn't happy, that I still loved him but that somewhere down the line we fell out of love. I asked him to go to counseling, he asked me to move out so he could think, then he asked me for a divorce. It was very very hard. It took me awhile to deal with being on my own, it's been 4+ years and I still have a hard time with it. After moving though I realized it was the best thing ever. I never truly realized how it was affecting my kids until after I moved. I thought they were clueless. They thrived, made tons of friends, got better grades, etc. I'm not saying that that's the thing for you to do but you need to really decide what you want and what you think is best and go from there.

If you have spiritual ties then I'd suggest talking to someone in your church or if not, perhaps speak to a counselor before making any big decisions. If it's just you and not him like you mentioned, talking to a counselor might help you find out why and you may resolve the issue without ever having to hurt his feelings or whatnot.

Life is what you make out of it. Only you can make or break your own happiness. I wish you well. Good luck.

ytsirk27 · 02-17-2006, 07:21 AM

I would like to say that We have talked and Iwe are going to work it out someway.. We have 2 girls to think about and they will be soo sad as will I if anything did happen. I told him how i felt and we have resolved some deep issues. I think this is best for my family and since the other night that "emptiness" doesnt seem to be there anymore. Thank You for all your support and advice. We are going away by ourselves tomorrow and tomorrow night to reconnect.

It's hard to believe but Im really happy about this. I dont want my marriage to fail so im glad were both willing to work on it!! Thank again all....

deb4air · 02-17-2006, 07:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ytsirk27

I would like to say that We have talked and Iwe are going to work it out someway.. We have 2 girls to think about and they will be soo sad as will I if anything did happen. I told him how i felt and we have resolved some deep issues. I think this is best for my family and since the other night that "emptiness" doesnt seem to be there anymore. Thank You for all your support and advice. We are going away by ourselves tomorrow and tomorrow night to reconnect.

It's hard to believe but Im really happy about this. I dont want my marriage to fail so im glad were both willing to work on it!! Thank again all....

Good for you all ..I will be thinking nothing but the highest thoughts for you and yours , and remind you ..your love is within you*

cheryl000 · 02-17-2006, 08:09 AM

Great news! Hope you two are able to reconnect- it's so easy to become more of a partnership than a relationship when you are so busy with the kids, the pets, cleaning, working on the daycare. I am glad that you two are taking the time off from all of that to concentrate on eachother. I definately still think there's love there since you two both want to work on it. Just try to concentrate on his good qualities because no spouse is perfect.
Have fun and keep us updated!

Princess Zoe · 02-17-2006, 09:34 AM

That's wonderful news!!! I'm so happy for you guys! Communication is a wonderful thing, and I'm glad he was finally willing to talk! Have a great day together

02-15-2006, 01:49 PM	#94
BabyFidgette Learn Yorkie CPR! Donating Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: New Jersey Posts: 6,855	I know what might make you feel better....you have any pictures of your Yorkie? I can make you an avatar if you'd like. Not as great as others, but I'm learning. Just let me know! __________________ Nicole & Baby "The more men I meet, the more I love my Yorkie!"

02-15-2006, 04:17 PM	#101
Tiggerwit Just me 'n my boys Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Murphy, TX Posts: 4,596	This is tough. First of all I'd like to say that I haven't read everyone's advice and remember that our experiences and such may not necessarily be what's right for you, only you can make that decision. I also do not know the full extent as to why you feel the way you do. But from my experience I think you need to talk to him. I think it's important to be honest about your feelings. You may be surprised that he may be feeling the same disconnection and just didn't know how to say anything. I was married for 15 years and felt disconnected for several years. I was was so scared of being alone that I just couldn't bring myself to say anything to my husband. I had two little girls also to think about. I tried to ignore it and things got worse. He pushed me away and started living another life so to speak, opened his own account, didn't want to tell me where he was, etc. I was making myself physically sick. I finally just did it. I told him I wasn't happy, that I still loved him but that somewhere down the line we fell out of love. I asked him to go to counseling, he asked me to move out so he could think, then he asked me for a divorce. It was very very hard. It took me awhile to deal with being on my own, it's been 4+ years and I still have a hard time with it. After moving though I realized it was the best thing ever. I never truly realized how it was affecting my kids until after I moved. I thought they were clueless. They thrived, made tons of friends, got better grades, etc. I'm not saying that that's the thing for you to do but you need to really decide what you want and what you think is best and go from there. If you have spiritual ties then I'd suggest talking to someone in your church or if not, perhaps speak to a counselor before making any big decisions. If it's just you and not him like you mentioned, talking to a counselor might help you find out why and you may resolve the issue without ever having to hurt his feelings or whatnot. Life is what you make out of it. Only you can make or break your own happiness. I wish you well. Good luck. Last edited by Tiggerwit; 02-15-2006 at 04:20 PM.

02-17-2006, 09:34 AM	#105
Princess Zoe YT Addict Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Washington Posts: 251	That's wonderful news!!! I'm so happy for you guys! Communication is a wonderful thing, and I'm glad he was finally willing to talk! Have a great day together __________________ Zoe and Pixie's Mommy

02-17-2006, 07:21 AM	#102
ytsirk27 BANNED FOR SCAMMING MEMBERS! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 2,811	I would like to say that We have talked and Iwe are going to work it out someway.. We have 2 girls to think about and they will be soo sad as will I if anything did happen. I told him how i felt and we have resolved some deep issues. I think this is best for my family and since the other night that "emptiness" doesnt seem to be there anymore. Thank You for all your support and advice. We are going away by ourselves tomorrow and tomorrow night to reconnect. It's hard to believe but Im really happy about this. I dont want my marriage to fail so im glad were both willing to work on it!! Thank again all....

02-17-2006, 08:09 AM	#104
cheryl000 YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: none Posts: 1,495	Great news! Hope you two are able to reconnect- it's so easy to become more of a partnership than a relationship when you are so busy with the kids, the pets, cleaning, working on the daycare. I am glad that you two are taking the time off from all of that to concentrate on eachother. I definately still think there's love there since you two both want to work on it. Just try to concentrate on his good qualities because no spouse is perfect. Have fun and keep us updated!