My Baby is Gone...

[menamc]

Hello All,

New here, and don't know if this is the right thread to be posting in, but I had to share with someone, and I figured most of you would understand.

This is kind of a long story, so hang on until the end.

I've been wanting a Yorkie since I was a teen. At the time, I had a PickAPoo, and she was my baby. Went everywhere I went. Slept with me, rode with me, everything. She was killed at 8 years, by a car.

Anyway, I met my husband over three years ago. He already had a dog, Dolly, a mixed Whippet. He claimed she didn't get along with other dogs. So, I resigned myself to the fact that I might not be able to get my baby until Dolly passed.

Just recently we moved back to Alabama from Tennessee. We found a house with a fenced in back yard (rental). My DH began 'talking' about getting another dog. We took Dolly down to the shelter to see how she would interact. She did wonderful! So, we told the shelter director, a friend of ours, to be on the lookout for a Yorkie, for we wanted a rescue, not a puppy mill.

In the meantime, we found a house to buy that we loved. It had large fenced in back yard, room enough to run. So, we began packing and moving. The week after moving in, we got a call from Shirley, the shelter director. She had a Yorkie!! I can't tell you how excited I was! I rushed down there to get him, only to be called and told 'You might not want this dog. He just bit Shirley, and all she was doing was taking him out of my arms.' (This from Shirley's daughter.) I knew he had been abused, but at this time, didn't know the extent. I went on to the shelter, and met my DH there. I told him to go back and look at Rascal, and if he said OK, then we would take him. Otherwise, I didn't even want to see him.

I sometimes wish that he had come out of that room and said 'No, he's too violent. We can't take him.' But, he didn't, and I took my baby home.

I had been told that he was abused, but didn't find out until later just how badly. Apparently, he was hit and kicked for no reason at all. This breaks my heart...why do people do this? And, this dog came from a prominent family in the community. Of course, we were not supposed to know that at all.

After I got Ras home, I put his crate down and he went right into it. He began to growl if I even came near it, and wouldn't stop until I backed away. Oh, before I brought him home, he bit one of my DH's co-workers, because I was holding him, and she went to pet him. At first, he didn't like anyone trying to touch him while someone else was holding him. Back to the house. Next, he found a bag of garbage, and when I began to approach to take it away, he started growling, and wouldn't stop until I backed away. The surprising thing is, he did well with Dolly.

We began working with him, using a spray water bottle as punishment. He seemed to be doing much, much better. We even had a obedience trainer over, and she said we were doing all the right things.

Then came the weekend that I had to go to my mom's and left Ras here with my DH. He spazzed out. He was being really dominant with Jess, doing idiotic stuff. He has always had a problem with being curled up wherever, the bed, the couch, the floor, his bed, etc, and if you try to pick him up, he starts growling. At first, I could spray him, and he would stop. Back to the weekend with Jess. He has a 'room' where he sleeps. Apparently, at one point, he walked into that room, and began growling over his shoulder at Jess, asserting that it was 'his room' and no one could come in there. Also, he came at Jess, for no reason. Then, he pee-peed on Jess' chair, for no reason. And, he bit him.

So, by the time that I got home, my DH was upset, and ready to get rid of the dog. I wasn't, for I had not been here to witness this, and didn't know how bad it was. All that week, he was so good. I began trying a different tactic with him, where if he did something good, no matter what it was, he was praised. If he did something bad, he was scolded, and ignored.

Last Saturday night, he was laying on our bed, on Jess' side, and I went over to pet him. He wasn't asleep. He began growling, so I began pushing him off the bed with a pillow, like we were told. He turned and attacked the pillow, which would have been me. Jess immediately went and got his gloves and his jacket, picked Ras up off the bed, with him biting him the whole time, and laid him on the ground, holding him there while he stroked his belly. Eventually, he quit growling, got up and acted like nothing had happened, which is what he always did.

I need to say this...when I say 'growling' I don't mean normal growling. I had never heard this kind before. It sounds like a demon dog, and he begins to bare all of his teeth, pulling back his entire mouth. His eyes take on a different look, as well, almost as if his pupils dilate. But, then, as I said, after it's all over with, he went back to being a sweet, loving dog.

Sunday, my DH was lying on the bed watching the race. Ras was on the floor, and I had walked out of the room. Ras found some candy over beside my bed, and began eating it. Jess leaned over the bed, and began talking to him. Ras was standing up beside the bed, licking him, and being fine. Jess looked away, and Ras bit him, without provocation. The bite was through the skin, and my DH still doesn't have any feeling in that finger. At that point, he was gone.

Monday, I was getting ready to go out to dinner, and Ras was on Jess' side of the bed. I walked around and went to pet him, he started growling. I walked off, saying 'Bad dog. You're a Bad Rascal.' I came back later, and he was into his 'demon growl', he wouldn't let me get within ten feet of my own bedroom. He began jumping all over the bed, and getting louder and louder. I finally dumped a whole bottle of water on him, and shut the door. Then, he wanted out, and wanted me to pick him up.

Tuesday morning, my husband took him back to the shelter. I have never cried like that in my life. Shirley promised us that he would not be put to sleep, and that she was calling Small Dog Rescue. Hopefully, he can get the help he needs, and can be saved.

Trust me, I loved this baby, and tried so hard to help him. He had gotten better on a lot of things, but there were things that were getting worse. We couldn't be held prisoner in our own home. I loved that baby, and I still miss him, and will for a long, long, time. I didn't want to give him up, and fought with my husband over it more times than one, but after this weekend, and Monday, I saw that it wasn't getting any better.

I hope to get another Yorkie soon. Not to take the place of Ras, but to help me heal. I hope that I can rescue another one, but most of the groups want too much, or they won't adopt to me for I have a 'large' dog...40lb Whippet...I don't think she's large, and she's the most docile thing I've ever seen.

If anyone knows of a dog in need of rescue close to central Alabama, please let me know.

Thank you for listening to my story. I needed to share with someone, for it's been a heartbreaking week.

~~Melena

[lisatodd]

i am so sorry. i hope things will get better for you

[Gazou]

Maybe you should wait for a while before having another one .

[Tatiana11]

I am very sorry

[chattiesmom]

I am so very sorry, I can only imagine how much you are hurting right now.

[janedks3406]

sorry to hear this, very heart breaking indeed.

[menamc]

Originally Posted by Gazou

Maybe you should wait for a while before having another one .

While I see what you're saying, and appreciate your input, I have been told by numerous people that the best thing to do in our situation is to get another. We did everything right by this baby, only trying to help him. As my husband has sai, he chose to leave. We weren't doing him any favors by keeping him here, for we could not fix him, even though we tried so, so hard. We only had him less than two months, but I feel as if it were longer than that. I know another baby could never replace him, and the way that I loved him, but, what I'm hoping is that I can find a baby that is not dominant as Ras was, and wasn't as badly abused. As I sit here typing, I am so sad that we couldn't fix him. I think of all the things we could have done, should have done, and yet, I know the bottom line is, we aren't equipped to fix a dog with issues like Rascal had. The only comfort I have right now is knowing that he is not going to be put to sleep, and knowing that someday, I will have another baby.

What's killing me, is he's just down the road, at the shelter. I so want to go get him, and bring him home.

~Melena

[ARCHIE]

Melena, I am so sorry it did not work out for you.
Poor baby must have been so abused and didn't trust anyone.
Just a thought: Is it possible to visit the shelter, since it is so close to you,
and visit with the Yorkie daily for awhile and see if he will start to trust you?
Maybe bring him treats etc and hopefully he will start to look for you. Build
up trust between the two of you.
Those people should be hung for what they did to that poor baby.
How old was the dog?

[Juliealfies mum]

I feel so bad for you right now....the first people who had this dog ,did this to him it is such a shame for him I hope they find someone who can handle him.
But you are not to blame you tried hard to help him.He sounds as if he needs expert help.

[wemple2]

Tough story, sad that he was abused and couldn't get past this. But if you felt you weren't equipped to take on such a challenge, Raz will be better off somewhere else. Sometimes, unfortunately love is not enough, the abused dogs need special care, and hopefully he'll find someone who can offer that kind of care. My thoughts are with you, but maybe you need a puppy rather than a rescue, that way he won't come with issues. Not saying puppies are easy, they do take a lot of time and patience, but any problems you may encounter are easier to deal with. Good Luck!!!

[Ozzie'sperson]

[Pipersmommy]

Wow! What a story. Sounds to me you did everything possible. That poor dog for what those people did to him. If my kids ever tried to bite me they would be wearing a muzzel for a week. But he did, makes you wonder & how he feels so desperate to retreat to that when all you did was love him. My kids have never even growled at me, let alone try & bite me. I guess it will take someone alot of time to win his trust.

[menamc]

Originally Posted by ARCHIE

Melena, I am so sorry it did not work out for you.
Poor baby must have been so abused and didn't trust anyone.
Just a thought: Is it possible to visit the shelter, since it is so close to you,
and visit with the Yorkie daily for awhile and see if he will start to trust you?
Maybe bring him treats etc and hopefully he will start to look for you. Build
up trust between the two of you.
Those people should be hung for what they did to that poor baby.
How old was the dog?

Hi Archie,

Yes, we figured he had some really bad trust issues. We just didn't know how to fix the growling/biting.

We have talked about getting him back, if he can be fixed. But, we are afraid that if we do bring him back, it will 'reset' him, thus making us have to give him up again, and I absolutely cannot do that.

Therefore, even though what you suggested is a wonderful idea, I am afraid that it won't work, and even if it does, that if I bring him back home, he'll act the same way. He's got to have some serious, serious work done with him. And I didn't know how.

Also, he could already be gone from the shelter. I don't think so, for I think Shirley would have called, but still.

He did trust us, to an extent. I could even pet him while he was eating. He would let me pick him up off the ground, etc. But, there were times when I would pet him, that he would duck his head, as if he was afraid I was going to hit him.

What I feel like happened to this baby, is that he was abused every day of his life, and his only defense was to bite, growl, etc. Therefore, he was afraid we were doing the same. And, as I said, he did come to trust us to a certain extent, but we couldn't break him of the worst.

Thanks to everyone for their kind words. It really means alot to me right now. I'm just trying to make it through the day without crying. I've put up everything that was his, so that I don't see it, and breakdown. I would post some of the MANY pictures I have, (for I am a scrapper, and have tons!), but I just can't right now.

~Melena

[RoxyJosMom]

I'm so sorry for what you went thru and are going thru and for little Rascal. That poor little guy must have been horribly abused. You did everything in your power to help this poor soul but he only know self preservation. Only time and serious behavorial adjusting will heal him. Prayers for you to find a rescue that will crave your care and love and for Rascal to get the help he needs so he can find his forever home and be spoiled and loved like he deserves.

[menamc]

Oh, and I forgot. He will be five in June. Therefore, he was abused for almost five years of his life. Consolation in that is that I did give him a happy home for two months, and he probably was happier than he had been since he was a baby.

~Melena