Something to debate... Let's keep it civil.

[abbie's mom]

NO ONE deserves to be spoken to in such a manner. Especially senior citizens, who have 'done their time' shaping society. Unfortunately, from what I hear from friends and other family members, disrespect and smart-mouthedness is the 'norm' for the younger set these days.

I'd have been peeling myself off the floor had I shown ANY adult such disrespect.

[sashajade]

Originally Posted by chachi

My Brother in laws 3 year old daughter screams at him and hits him. He trys to reason with her and it just doesnt work. She needs a good old fashioned spank on the butt. It is sad because they live two doors down from us and there is a little girl accross the street that she could play with but the Mother doesnt want her over there because she dont behave. So My Daughter is asked to go over there and play all the time. If Samantha didnt have My Daughter to play with shed have no one

aww that is sad mind you you cant reason with a 3 year old you have to set boundrys and stick to them or they will play up, and if smacking worked then why do people have to do it more than once?
mums and dads are making monsters.

[Catrina]

Wow.. I agree with everybody about this...

and I think your son NEEDS to say something

my mom doesnt really like her MIL (my grandmother) either, BUT she is always nice to her, even if my MIL says something a little rude, my mom still smiles and is nice.. later on my mom might get upset and talk to my dad about it, but still.. she doesnt do this in front of her MIL...

[chachi]

Originally Posted by sashajade

aww that is sad mind you you cant reason with a 3 year old you have to set boundrys and stick to them or they will play up, and if smacking worked then why do people have to do it more than once?
mums and dads are making monsters.

Her parents do set boundaries and they ground her. It doesnt work. She is going on 4 years old and she is contstantly in trouble at school for hitting other kids. They dont have any control over her at all and she is only going on 4 years old. What will it be like when shes 16.

[red98vett]

I read alot of the replies and I can't believe what kids think is ok these days I'm not a grandmother and I'm FAR from old fashioned but what I just read really blew me away.

my feeling is Parents need to get hold of these kids and stop this kind of behaviour BEFORE it gets to the point where a kid is old enough to cuss them out and it should never be normal to speak that way to adults.

I'm super close to my boys and they've never EVER talked to me like what I read in this thread and I'd be devestated ....just like my mother would be devestated if I ever spoke that way to her.

It's no wonder these days we hear all the stories we hear. If kids are growing up thinking this is normal behaviour they're going to have a very rude awakening or get the stuff kicked out of them one day by a MAD adult who isn't going to take that kind of talk.

and Jeannie....I would talk to your son & really lay it out for him...Your situation sounds really bad and that woman sounds just plain jealous of anyone in your sons life and that's HER problem - no woman should be so insecure she's gets between a mom and her kids no matter how old that 'kid' is.

[YORKIEMOM2B2006]

I never have and never will talk to my mom or mother in law like that..i never did my dad and father in law either. thats just rude and un caring.

the ladies on babytalk must be young, because some of the younger generation seems to be so different and uncaring......

jeannie my sons g/f is like your daughter in law. i know how you must be feeling, it hurts. i let my son know everytime something is said or done so he knows whats going on, i havnt talked to his g/f in about 2 months and i never will again, she is just trouble with a capitol T.....my son knows i am here for him whenever he needs me but i have no room in my life for her...

[JeanieK]

Originally Posted by red98vett

and Jeannie....I would talk to your son & really lay it out for him...Your situation sounds really bad and that woman sounds just plain jealous of anyone in your sons life and that's HER problem - no woman should be so insecure she's gets between a mom and her kids no matter how old that 'kid' is.

I believe that she is really insecure. This is her second marriage, her first marriage lasted 15 months. She claims he left her to go home to mama because he was such a mama's boy and was over there all the time doing things for her. But I wonder if he didn't leave her because he could not stand her bitching about his mother and he was more of a man about it than my son is.

On the other hand, she was pregnant when my son married her so he has more at stake than the other husband did.

The two of them stayed here with me for a month before they moved over to Wales. during that time I was drywalling my basement. The agreement was that my son would help me with it, in exchange for staying her. (Most sons would have helped anyway). She sat in the bedroom and pouted everytime we were downstairs working together. and she'd make comments like "I may as well just fly back home and you stay here".. I could see at that time that she was very controlling.

[bebeyorkie]

Originally Posted by red98vett

I read alot of the replies and I can't believe what kids think is ok these days I'm not a grandmother and I'm FAR from old fashioned but what I just read really blew me away.

my feeling is Parents need to get hold of these kids and stop this kind of behaviour BEFORE it gets to the point where a kid is old enough to cuss them out and it should never be normal to speak that way to adults.

I'm super close to my boys and they've never EVER talked to me like what I read in this thread and I'd be devestated ....just like my mother would be devestated if I ever spoke that way to her.

It's no wonder these days we hear all the stories we hear. If kids are growing up thinking this is normal behaviour they're going to have a very rude awakening or get the stuff kicked out of them one day by a MAD adult who isn't going to take that kind of talk.

and Jeannie....I would talk to your son & really lay it out for him...Your situation sounds really bad and that woman sounds just plain jealous of anyone in your sons life and that's HER problem - no woman should be so insecure she's gets between a mom and her kids no matter how old that 'kid' is.

I totally agree. I've never even raised my voice or yelled @ my mom.

I have 3 daughters 23 yr old, 21 yr old and 14 yr old and I have to admit we have had our share of arguements and they can have an atiitude here and there (hello they're girls lol lol) but I would never allow them to disrespect me and they know better.

I know for a fact it all comes down to the way they were raised. If those parents didn't teach them to respect all adults then they're not going to respect them either.

I work with kids between the ages of 10 thru 16 and It saddens me to say this but the majority of this kids can't stand their parents they call them every disrespectful name they know. And no they don't all come from disfunctional families. Some have your regular household with mom, pop and siblings. But like I said before it all starts when they're babies that's when we have to teach them and show them what respect is. Just my opinion.

[bebeyorkie]

Oh I forgot to mention my daughters and I are very very close - we do everything together. People think we're sisters lol

[JeanieK]

Originally Posted by bebeyorkie

Oh I forgot to mention my daughters and I are very very close - we do everything together. People think we're sisters lol

My girls and I laugh and laugh when we're together. I'm sure there is a lot of eye rolling going on behind my back. but that's just part of the fun. LOL

[Ashley V]

I think what those women told your daughter on babytalk was awful... but they'll get theirs in the end. One day their kids are going to talk to them like that and... OH WELL! I would never dream of talking to my mother in law that way either and she has treated me like crap. To make a long story short - my husband and I got married 4 months ago... and she told him she would not go to the wedding because she basically didn't approve of me and said "it's against God's will to marry her" and SHE NEVER HAS MET ME! She lives only 20 minutes away and never once asked to meet me and basically told my mom she blames me for any problems she and my husband have. Even though I could care less about ever seeing her, I still would never disrespect her.

[FlDebra]

Adding my thoughts that mothers in general and my mother in particular deserve my utmost respect. Not only did she give me life, sacrifice for me and my siblings, but she is a very fine lady who I love with all my heart. I do think the "position" of mother or MIL deserves respect by itself -- but my mom has escalated that respect by the life she leads and love she extends. She never meddles, she never judges -- but even if she did, I'd find a way to deal with it because I love her!

If my sons ever spoke to me with the disrespect, it would break my heart -- not just for the personal hurt but because I would feel I had failed them in some way to leave them with so little regard. But thank God, I am sure I will never have to deal with that. I have been blessed with 3 wonderful, thoughtful sons. They not only say yes ma'am and no ma'am -- they are respectful in their hearts as well.

[JeanieK]

Originally Posted by Ashley V

I think what those women told your daughter on babytalk was awful... but they'll get theirs in the end. One day their kids are going to talk to them like that and... OH WELL! I would never dream of talking to my mother in law that way either and she has treated me like crap. To make a long story short - my husband and I got married 4 months ago... and she told him she would not go to the wedding because she basically didn't approve of me and said "it's against God's will to marry her" and SHE NEVER HAS MET ME! She lives only 20 minutes away and never once asked to meet me and basically told my mom she blames me for any problems she and my husband have. Even though I could care less about ever seeing her, I still would never disrespect her.

That is so sad. doesn't she trust her son to be able to choose his own wife.? It sounds to me like she is jealous. Wait til she sees the grandbabies, she'll come around.

[peanut]

OMG, my mother would slap me across the room if I ever talked to her that way and I am 42...My daughter wouldn't disrespect me that way either, she tells me how she feels and I tell her how I feel, but she wouldn't talk to me that way at all...My son is getting married in October and I am afraid that I will have the same problem with my future daughter in law, but if she does that is going to be there loss not mine...I didn't raise my children to talk to me that way, and I will not let her either...I can cuss just like the rest of them if I have too, but you have to have some respect for your parents and yourself...I hope things get better for you Jeanie, but if your DIL doesn't come around its her loss, cause she is missing out on a chance to know a great person....

[TootiesMom]

my mother is my hero! I would never even consider talking back to her! She instilled the right things in us as children and it is just not something that would happen... I instilled the same thing in my children and it is a beautiful thing to be so proud of my daughters... they even fuss at their friends for being disrespectful to their parents!
My MIL, well she is a different story.. I have wanted to, many times, tell her like it is but I have never done it. She is very CONTROLLING and I married her oldest son, it took me a while to put her in the right perspective...
Respect is earned AND taught....
I feel sorry for your DIL