They are always in our hearts - YorkieTalk.com Forums

TinkerToy · 02-18-2005, 04:28 PM

2 years ago I had to put my schnauzer Mitzi asleep. I had her since I was 3 years old. She was 15 years old, and it was just her time. My family and I were in the process of moving, and everyday I feel so horrible for not paying enough attention to her on he last days. I remember leaving her in an almost empty house with my father so I could get my things up to our new house. I was planning on coming back to get her, but my father called me to tell me she was not doing well. So I am in a new city alone, and my poor baby was facing this without me. I don't think I will ever forgive myself for that. They are your family, and when they pass it is very hard to get over because you have this unspoken bond that can't be replaced. I think about her every single day. About 7 mos. ago I got my little one Tinker. She has been such a blessing. I didn't think that I could ever get another dog, but I am glad I did and I really believe Mitzi is happy that I am happy again. I just want to tell everyone who has lost their companion that it does get better. You will have your bad days, but they are always with you. Sometimes I can still feel Mitzi cuddled up next to my feet. I believe they are still there with us and will always be there!!! I will pray for all of you. If anyone needs to talk I am always here to give advice.

Shelbies heart · 02-18-2005, 04:37 PM

I feel my Shelbie next to me at night too, sometimes I feel her getting comfortable in the bed next to my legs and it wakes me up. I just smile and say "I love you Shelbie" I think they are always with us too! Thanks for your post, it was great.

donna · 02-19-2005, 03:08 AM

Yes thank you for your post, it does help so much to hear that people get throught this.
My Bubbles died just over a day ago and right now I just feel so lost. But yes, I still feel him beside me. I keep thinking that I hear him breathing next to me. It's mad but it's kind of comforting.
I'm glad you have a new baby to love, you're so brave. I hope one day I have the strength to love another.

TinkerToy · 02-19-2005, 11:41 AM

Donna, I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you. Believe me it gets easier. It is a slow process, but your memories are what get you through it. I still talk to Mitzi all the time. Although it has been two years I can still remember how it feels to pet her, and her eyes. The memories are fading a little, but I still have pictures that help bring them back. Someday you will have the courage to get another dog. At first I didn't think I could ever even think of getting another one, because Mitzi was the best ever and I didn't think it was possible to love another one. After a year or so I could feel the peace with the idea. It was almost like Mitzi knew how destroyed I was and that she wanted me to be happy again. I am very thankful for Tinker she has been my saving grace. I never thought there would be a day that I wouldn't cry about Mitzi, but Tinker has helped me move on. When I wrote my message above I was crying, and Tinker sat on my lap licking up my tears. I think Mitzi would have loved Tinker =). I know how tough the first days were for me, and it helps tremendously to talk about the good times. My mother and I sat on the porch and talked about when we first got Mitzi and all the funny things she used to do. Try and talk about Bubbles to someone at least once a day. I will come her at least once a day and talk to you about her and tell you how I got through this if you would like. I wish I had this forum when I lost Mitzi so I could have someone else to talk to that has gone through the same thing. And believe me if you have a good long cry it helps. Just always remember how much Bubbles loved you and how lucky you both are to be apart of eachothers lives. he is always right beside you where ever you go. Don't forget I am here to help if you want it.

donna · 02-21-2005, 03:42 PM

Thanks for your post. I had a really bad night on Saturday, it all suddenly hit me. I hadn't made his dinner, or nursed him or been with him for just over a day and the reality started to kick me. I spent ages just crying so hard for him and me and what I wouldn't have anymore. I think it was the first time I really released my feelings.

I do feel better now. Of course I'm not ok, or over him but I feel like I've come to terms with what's happened. I can look at photos now and although I feel sad his face can make me smile again. I'm still crying a lot because I just miss him so much but I think I feel calmer. Being here and reading everyone's lovely stories about their own babies makes me happier and seeing their pictures too.

I have some wonderful memories of Bubbles and I think I'm going to make a little memory book full of my memories so that I can always keep them. It may be theraputic too.

I've had some great support - sympathy cards and flowers.

It helps that people understand he wasn't just a pet, he was part of our family.

TinkerToy · 02-21-2005, 06:36 PM

I am sooo happy you are doing better. It is amazing at how much a good cry helps. It is as if you can't cry anymore so you can start focusing on all the good memories. I noticed you have posted a few message through out the site. I think that is great. It helps so much to give people advice and to talk about your experience with your little angel. I was telling my mom about this site and this particular message board. She wishes she had this, because eventhough people understand that losing a pet is difficult if they have never gone through it it just doesnt' seem to register the same. Talking to people who know how it feels makes you feel like you are not the only one. I hope and pray everything gets better, and Tinker and I send lots of hugs!!!

Chelsey · 02-24-2005, 03:08 PM

oi Donna girl i know so well what ur going through, it might be hard for u to smile right now and i wish i could just reach out and give u a big hug, 18 months ago when my last baby left us i thought i could never love again but time heals and now we have a new baby to love and i love her all over like i loved and still love all my other three babies, they never really leave u and yes its very normal to feel him near u... thats him trying to comfort u and telling u that he is with u, he loves u girl and he will always be in ur heart!
In time ull live on with fond memories of ur baby.
If ever u need to cry or talk on here, ur always welcome to send messages, just know ur not alone on this ok.

Wishing u lots of strength and peace!

Consider urself hugged from me and a big puppyhug and kisses from Chelsey

donna · 02-28-2005, 12:48 PM

Thanks for the nice messages girls. I've been having a couple of blue days. It seems to be getting harder at the moment, rather than easier.

I'm an actress and so I'm not always at work, which is why so much of time was spent with Bubbles. Whenever I'd get called for work I'd have to check that he'd be ok and that someone would be around for him. I got called fr work today and stopped for a moment to think whether anyone would be around to take care of Bubbles. Then I remembered that he isn't here. It's those moments that just cut me in half.

I'm really feeling the pain these last few days. I'm starting to feel really empty and lonely without him. I think it's wierd also that people around me are moving on better than I am and so we are no longer all in that period of grief.

It's just very strange to have complete lack of control over how you feel. I miss my baby so much.

Shelbies heart · 02-28-2005, 04:46 PM

Donna, I know exactly how you feel, my Shelbie died in November and it seemed I was the only one in our family that couldn't get on with life. My kids and husband say they are getting tired of the Shelbie Shrine I have on my mantle. Lots of pictures to help me feel she is still here. My husband told me the other day that he hurts for me because I have not been the same since she passed and maybe I should get another baby.

Shelbies heart · 02-28-2005, 04:52 PM

Donna, I know exactly how you feel, my Shelbie died in November and it seemed I was the only one in our family that couldn't get on with life. My kids and husband say they are getting tired of the Shelbie Shrine I have on my mantle. Lots of pictures to help me feel she is still here. My husband told me the other day that he hurts for me because I have not been the same since she passed and maybe I should get another baby. I wish I could tell you that the pain will end, but I can tell you that it does get a little easier. I still cry sometimes but mostly I feel her with me. The worst times are when I get home and the lonliness of her not being there hits me. I keep her pictures on my desk at work and talk to her all the time. She was my best friend for almost 15 years, it is so hard to get over her. I will keep you in my prayers, just know that are babies are probably running and playing together rite now in Heaven.
Wanda

lilbumbleybees · 02-28-2005, 06:06 PM

Donna, I know you must be going through such a hard time. Reading all of ya'lls posts made me tear up and cry and think about my Maddie. It's been 4 years since she's been gone and still I cry when I talk about her. But all the happy memories we have outweigh that bad day more than anything. You'll heal over time. *HUGS*

donna · 03-01-2005, 01:46 PM

Thanks guys. My family have been great, he was our family dog but really close to me because I nursed him when he was sick and we just bonded.

I think they have coped better because they have all gone back to work and hod the joy of distraction, where as I have been at home just left with no Bubbles. I worked today and it was nice to be out and doing a job again - also talking to people who have also lost their babies and realise how much pain it causes.

I know our babies will always be with us and I know things will get easier with time. There are good days and bad days and I have to remember it hasn't even been two weeks yet - I think I expect too much of myself, thinking everything will go back to normal!

I thank you for the messages and I'm sorry for all your losses too - I take such comfort in reading what you have to say and also knowing that all our babes are playing together.

I printed of some pics of Bubbles yesterday and left them around the house, when I came home from work tonight they were gone - my family had taken one each. It was nice to see they want a little keepsake of him too.

02-18-2005, 04:28 PM	#1
TinkerToy Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Austin,TX Posts: 76	They are always in our hearts 2 years ago I had to put my schnauzer Mitzi asleep. I had her since I was 3 years old. She was 15 years old, and it was just her time. My family and I were in the process of moving, and everyday I feel so horrible for not paying enough attention to her on he last days. I remember leaving her in an almost empty house with my father so I could get my things up to our new house. I was planning on coming back to get her, but my father called me to tell me she was not doing well. So I am in a new city alone, and my poor baby was facing this without me. I don't think I will ever forgive myself for that. They are your family, and when they pass it is very hard to get over because you have this unspoken bond that can't be replaced. I think about her every single day. About 7 mos. ago I got my little one Tinker. She has been such a blessing. I didn't think that I could ever get another dog, but I am glad I did and I really believe Mitzi is happy that I am happy again. I just want to tell everyone who has lost their companion that it does get better. You will have your bad days, but they are always with you. Sometimes I can still feel Mitzi cuddled up next to my feet. I believe they are still there with us and will always be there!!! I will pray for all of you. If anyone needs to talk I am always here to give advice.

02-19-2005, 11:41 AM	#4
TinkerToy Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Austin,TX Posts: 76	Donna, I am so sorry for your loss. I will be praying for you. Believe me it gets easier. It is a slow process, but your memories are what get you through it. I still talk to Mitzi all the time. Although it has been two years I can still remember how it feels to pet her, and her eyes. The memories are fading a little, but I still have pictures that help bring them back. Someday you will have the courage to get another dog. At first I didn't think I could ever even think of getting another one, because Mitzi was the best ever and I didn't think it was possible to love another one. After a year or so I could feel the peace with the idea. It was almost like Mitzi knew how destroyed I was and that she wanted me to be happy again. I am very thankful for Tinker she has been my saving grace. I never thought there would be a day that I wouldn't cry about Mitzi, but Tinker has helped me move on. When I wrote my message above I was crying, and Tinker sat on my lap licking up my tears. I think Mitzi would have loved Tinker =). I know how tough the first days were for me, and it helps tremendously to talk about the good times. My mother and I sat on the porch and talked about when we first got Mitzi and all the funny things she used to do. Try and talk about Bubbles to someone at least once a day. I will come her at least once a day and talk to you about her and tell you how I got through this if you would like. I wish I had this forum when I lost Mitzi so I could have someone else to talk to that has gone through the same thing. And believe me if you have a good long cry it helps. Just always remember how much Bubbles loved you and how lucky you both are to be apart of eachothers lives. he is always right beside you where ever you go. Don't forget I am here to help if you want it. Last edited by TinkerToy; 02-19-2005 at 09:34 PM.

02-28-2005, 06:06 PM	#11
lilbumbleybees YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Chattanooga, TN Posts: 1,339	Donna, I know you must be going through such a hard time. Reading all of ya'lls posts made me tear up and cry and think about my Maddie. It's been 4 years since she's been gone and still I cry when I talk about her. But all the happy memories we have outweigh that bad day more than anything. You'll heal over time. HUGS __________________ Liz Little Lotte , Bouncer, Lilli , Yodi

02-18-2005, 04:37 PM	#2
Shelbies heart YT Addict Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Louisville, Kentucky Posts: 258	I feel my Shelbie next to me at night too, sometimes I feel her getting comfortable in the bed next to my legs and it wakes me up. I just smile and say "I love you Shelbie" I think they are always with us too! Thanks for your post, it was great.

02-19-2005, 03:08 AM	#3
donna Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: UK Posts: 48	Yes thank you for your post, it does help so much to hear that people get throught this. My Bubbles died just over a day ago and right now I just feel so lost. But yes, I still feel him beside me. I keep thinking that I hear him breathing next to me. It's mad but it's kind of comforting. I'm glad you have a new baby to love, you're so brave. I hope one day I have the strength to love another.

02-21-2005, 03:42 PM	#5
donna Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: UK Posts: 48	Thanks for your post. I had a really bad night on Saturday, it all suddenly hit me. I hadn't made his dinner, or nursed him or been with him for just over a day and the reality started to kick me. I spent ages just crying so hard for him and me and what I wouldn't have anymore. I think it was the first time I really released my feelings. I do feel better now. Of course I'm not ok, or over him but I feel like I've come to terms with what's happened. I can look at photos now and although I feel sad his face can make me smile again. I'm still crying a lot because I just miss him so much but I think I feel calmer. Being here and reading everyone's lovely stories about their own babies makes me happier and seeing their pictures too. I have some wonderful memories of Bubbles and I think I'm going to make a little memory book full of my memories so that I can always keep them. It may be theraputic too. I've had some great support - sympathy cards and flowers. It helps that people understand he wasn't just a pet, he was part of our family.

02-21-2005, 06:36 PM	#6
TinkerToy Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Austin,TX Posts: 76	I am sooo happy you are doing better. It is amazing at how much a good cry helps. It is as if you can't cry anymore so you can start focusing on all the good memories. I noticed you have posted a few message through out the site. I think that is great. It helps so much to give people advice and to talk about your experience with your little angel. I was telling my mom about this site and this particular message board. She wishes she had this, because eventhough people understand that losing a pet is difficult if they have never gone through it it just doesnt' seem to register the same. Talking to people who know how it feels makes you feel like you are not the only one. I hope and pray everything gets better, and Tinker and I send lots of hugs!!!

02-24-2005, 03:08 PM	#7
Chelsey My2Pearls Chelsey & Chanel YT Donator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: N Posts: 4,097	oi Donna girl i know so well what ur going through, it might be hard for u to smile right now and i wish i could just reach out and give u a big hug, 18 months ago when my last baby left us i thought i could never love again but time heals and now we have a new baby to love and i love her all over like i loved and still love all my other three babies, they never really leave u and yes its very normal to feel him near u... thats him trying to comfort u and telling u that he is with u, he loves u girl and he will always be in ur heart! In time ull live on with fond memories of ur baby. If ever u need to cry or talk on here, ur always welcome to send messages, just know ur not alone on this ok. Wishing u lots of strength and peace! Consider urself hugged from me and a big puppyhug and kisses from Chelsey

02-28-2005, 12:48 PM	#8
donna Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: UK Posts: 48	Thanks for the nice messages girls. I've been having a couple of blue days. It seems to be getting harder at the moment, rather than easier. I'm an actress and so I'm not always at work, which is why so much of time was spent with Bubbles. Whenever I'd get called for work I'd have to check that he'd be ok and that someone would be around for him. I got called fr work today and stopped for a moment to think whether anyone would be around to take care of Bubbles. Then I remembered that he isn't here. It's those moments that just cut me in half. I'm really feeling the pain these last few days. I'm starting to feel really empty and lonely without him. I think it's wierd also that people around me are moving on better than I am and so we are no longer all in that period of grief. It's just very strange to have complete lack of control over how you feel. I miss my baby so much.

02-28-2005, 04:46 PM	#9
Shelbies heart YT Addict Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Louisville, Kentucky Posts: 258	Donna, I know exactly how you feel, my Shelbie died in November and it seemed I was the only one in our family that couldn't get on with life. My kids and husband say they are getting tired of the Shelbie Shrine I have on my mantle. Lots of pictures to help me feel she is still here. My husband told me the other day that he hurts for me because I have not been the same since she passed and maybe I should get another baby.

02-28-2005, 04:52 PM	#10
Shelbies heart YT Addict Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Louisville, Kentucky Posts: 258	Donna, I know exactly how you feel, my Shelbie died in November and it seemed I was the only one in our family that couldn't get on with life. My kids and husband say they are getting tired of the Shelbie Shrine I have on my mantle. Lots of pictures to help me feel she is still here. My husband told me the other day that he hurts for me because I have not been the same since she passed and maybe I should get another baby. I wish I could tell you that the pain will end, but I can tell you that it does get a little easier. I still cry sometimes but mostly I feel her with me. The worst times are when I get home and the lonliness of her not being there hits me. I keep her pictures on my desk at work and talk to her all the time. She was my best friend for almost 15 years, it is so hard to get over her. I will keep you in my prayers, just know that are babies are probably running and playing together rite now in Heaven. Wanda

03-01-2005, 01:46 PM	#12
donna Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: UK Posts: 48	Thanks guys. My family have been great, he was our family dog but really close to me because I nursed him when he was sick and we just bonded. I think they have coped better because they have all gone back to work and hod the joy of distraction, where as I have been at home just left with no Bubbles. I worked today and it was nice to be out and doing a job again - also talking to people who have also lost their babies and realise how much pain it causes. I know our babies will always be with us and I know things will get easier with time. There are good days and bad days and I have to remember it hasn't even been two weeks yet - I think I expect too much of myself, thinking everything will go back to normal! I thank you for the messages and I'm sorry for all your losses too - I take such comfort in reading what you have to say and also knowing that all our babes are playing together. I printed of some pics of Bubbles yesterday and left them around the house, when I came home from work tonight they were gone - my family had taken one each. It was nice to see they want a little keepsake of him too.