I want to scream

[BaxtersMommy]

I would have already got a puppy by now, and because of the selfish A hole, I woulda gotten 2 puppies and had him on poop patrol in the yard. Just sayin.....

[Cha Cha]

Originally Posted by HendrixandLucy

OMG how is her husband being a selfish controll freak?! That is just crazy!

Ok lets say you have 2 kids already and you want another one, but your husband does not.

Does that mean you are just going to go and get pregnant without his knowing. Like I said before--- you are just going to go and not take your birth controll and go behind is back and get pregnant so you can get your way?
That is absurd and SOOOOOO disrespectful!
A MARRIAGE IS A UNION OF LOVE AND MUTUAL RESPECT and these posts are completely hyppocritical!

ALL DECISSIONS need to be made together in a healthy marriage ESPECIALLY when there are large ammounts of money involved.

LOL, wouldn't we all love to know how often a woman has done that before. The fact that she got money from her father for her birthday to spend on herself, and her husband thinking that should be spent differently (possibly on himself) leads me to believe he is quite selfish and somewhat controlling. He may have very good reasons for wanting to spend the money differently, we don't really know their real situation. I am all about love and mutual respect in a perfect world too. It is also about give and take. If one person feels like they are giving more than their 50% then there is a good chance the other person feels like they have it pretty good.

[HendrixandLucy]

Originally Posted by Cha Cha

LOL, wouldn't we all love to know how often a woman has done that before. The fact that she got money from her father for her birthday to spend on herself, and her husband thinking that should be spent differently (possibly on himself) leads me to believe he is quite selfish and somewhat controlling. He may have very good reasons for wanting to spend the money differently, we don't really know their real situation. I am all about love and mutual respect in a perfect world too. It is also about give and take. If one person feels like they are giving more than their 50% then there is a good chance the other person feels like they have it pretty good.

You are right--- none of us know the real situation behind closed doors.... and more importantly we are only getting one side fo the story.... so who knows.

Buttt even if her birthday money pays to buy the puppy there aer lots more expenses.
I have to get my puppy spayed next month and my vet charges close to $500.00...... which with al of her shots and puppy vet checks, I have now paid more than what I paid for her (I paid $1000.)

ANNNNNDDDD they need their teeth professionally cleaned once a year which runs around $300.

There are just so many other expenses when you get a puppy, that even if she pays for the puppy by herself, her husband is still going to be involved in later expenses.

and not to mention they already have two other furbabies.....

[Kirby]

Originally Posted by HendrixandLucy

You are right--- none of us know the real situation behind closed doors.... and more importantly we are only getting one side fo the story.... so who knows.

Buttt even if her birthday money pays to buy the puppy there aer lots more expenses.
I have to get my puppy spayed next month and my vet charges close to $500.00...... which with al of her shots and puppy vet checks, I have now paid more than what I paid for her (I paid $1000.)

ANNNNNDDDD they need their teeth professionally cleaned once a year which runs around $300.

There are just so many other expenses when you get a puppy, that even if she pays for the puppy by herself, her husband is still going to be involved in later expenses.

and not to mention they already have two other furbabies.....

$500 for spaying?! I just had Sydney spayed and I paid $180. That covered diagnostic testing prior to surgery to make sure she was good for the procedure, the surgery, three baby teeth being pulled, nails trimmed, and pain pills. There is some upfront costs such as her crate, toys, clothes, and vaccinations, but she really hasn't been that costly. What would have been costly is if I didn't have her after our motorcycle accident. She has brought joy back to my life. You can't put a price on joy.

[yorkielover916]

Well it looks like I won't be getting my puppy for a long while now... I just found out that my puppy who is 10mos old has kidney problems and the vet isnt sure if he will make it. He got sick on saturday evening and has been sick since then... he is at the vet rt now getting treated and I have to pick him up tonight at 9pm. I do still want the puppy just not right now like I did before. I am sad about my Pete... I cannot be excited about getting a puppy anymore. btw, I had to cut down on some of his treatment b/c my DH didn't want to spend a large amount of money on him. So maybe now you have a small understanding of how he is. this is why when I get my own money that he has nothing to do with I buy the stuff that I want or sometimes need... the camera was an investment so that I could make extra money for our family and it does provide a little income now that i am not working that is what I sometimes count on. but to say that he can tell me what we should spend the money on when he didn't have any involvement in how it was obtained is to me wrong, if he got a large sum of money and wanted to spend it all on his game room I wouldn't have a problem with it. he isn't as much of an animal person as I am so if i could i would have a bird and more dogs. but I had to throw away the bird idea b/c he doesnt like birds, he doesnt like cats, he would rather have fish...

[GaBluerose]

My husband was the very came. He made me take my baby back the first day I brought her home. To me it was the last straw. I went back and got her in 2 days ans brought her home anyway. He is now crazy about her. Good Luck!

[GaBluerose]

My husband was the very same. He made me take my baby back the first day I brought her home. To me it was the last straw. I went back and got her in 2 days ans brought her home anyway. He is now crazy about her. Good Luck!

[Disney]

HendrixandLucy, I commend your posts! Very articulate and I totally agree.

[HendrixandLucy]

Originally Posted by Kirby

$500 for spaying?! I just had Sydney spayed and I paid $180. That covered diagnostic testing prior to surgery to make sure she was good for the procedure, the surgery, three baby teeth being pulled, nails trimmed, and pain pills. There is some upfront costs such as her crate, toys, clothes, and vaccinations, but she really hasn't been that costly. What would have been costly is if I didn't have her after our motorcycle accident. She has brought joy back to my life. You can't put a price on joy.

Yes, $500.00 for spaying ..... Ughh.
Buttt I do live in Los Angeles where everything is extra extra expensive annnd I guess my vet is really really qualified- she was the youngest person to ever go to UCLA (at age 12) and I guess she is lieterally a genius. The people who I have spoken to her absoltly adore her so it is worth it to me to pay a little more for somebody wonderful.

Plus as I said I worry so much about anesthesia and stuff and this vet specializes with tiny dogs...... But the price us deffinitely a big ouch

[DerbyLayne]

Originally Posted by HendrixandLucy

Here is the bottom line: When you are married (or in a commited relationship where you finacially depend on eachother) I don't care who has the money or where the money is coming from accident or not, every decission should be made together. And this of all decissions involves a lot of money and a it is a big huge commitment.
I am all about saying "oh just buy the puppy blah blah blah" but truthfully, when it comes down to it--- this is a huge and expensive decission that needs to be thought through and talked about and decided upon TOGETHER.

Somebody posted earlier that one of the most important things in a marriage is mutaul respect for one another. That means you need to respect him enough to talk this out and not go behind his back AND if he truly truly does not want the puppy than I really think that at this time you do need to respect that.
But from the other side- he also needs to respect your wishes and listen to you and hear you out.
Sounds to me like you two need to sit down and have a serious talk-- all jokes and puppy dog eyes put aside

I was posting non stop about marriage being mutual respect, and major decisions should be made together etc. I agree with you, and I still stand by what I said HOWEVER...

Hearing more of this story, I think, like another post said, that they have far bigger issues in their marriage then getting a dog or not getting a dog.

I think they need to come together and work something out about the major thing in their marriage: FINANCES because it sounds to me like things aren't exactly equal here, and before they make another FINANCIAL decision things need to be laid out on the table.

Getting a dog isn't going fix s**t.

[HendrixandLucy]

Originally Posted by Disney

HendrixandLucy, I commend your posts! Very articulate and I totally agree.

Thanks Disney

[Disney]

Originally Posted by yorkielover916

Well it looks like I won't be getting my puppy for a long while now... I just found out that my puppy who is 10mos old has kidney problems and the vet isnt sure if he will make it. He got sick on saturday evening and has been sick since then... he is at the vet rt now getting treated and I have to pick him up tonight at 9pm. I do still want the puppy just not right now like I did before. I am sad about my Pete... I cannot be excited about getting a puppy anymore. btw, I had to cut down on some of his treatment b/c my DH didn't want to spend a large amount of money on him. So maybe now you have a small understanding of how he is. this is why when I get my own money that he has nothing to do with I buy the stuff that I want or sometimes need... the camera was an investment so that I could make extra money for our family and it does provide a little income now that i am not working that is what I sometimes count on. but to say that he can tell me what we should spend the money on when he didn't have any involvement in how it was obtained is to me wrong, if he got a large sum of money and wanted to spend it all on his game room I wouldn't have a problem with it. he isn't as much of an animal person as I am so if i could i would have a bird and more dogs. but I had to throw away the bird idea b/c he doesnt like birds, he doesnt like cats, he would rather have fish...

This may sound unfair, but if nothing else..Do you really want to bring a puppy into an environment where it is not wanted? Perhaps the best thing you can do for this puppy is not get it..Him not wanting to spend money on your current pet says leaps and bounds..Say your yorkie wasn't well, how would you cope with the grief when your partner just didn't understand your pain?

[DerbyLayne]

Originally Posted by HendrixandLucy

Yes, $500.00 for spaying ..... Ughh.

We paid $500 in Toronto

[Disney]

Thta's insane! In Australia it's only about $100 dollars where I am.

[HendrixandLucy]

Originally Posted by DerbyLayne

I was posting non stop about marriage being mutual respect, and major decisions should be made together etc. I agree with you, and I still stand by what I said HOWEVER...

Hearing more of this story, I think, like another post said, that they have far bigger issues in their marriage then getting a dog or not getting a dog.

I think they need to come together and work something out about the major thing in their marriage: FINANCES because it sounds to me like things aren't exactly equal here, and before they make another FINANCIAL decision things need to be laid out on the table.

Getting a dog isn't going fix s**t.

Totally agree. Like I said- we have no idea what's really going on behind closed doors.