Just gotta vent! MEN! - Page 4 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

labrown · 09-05-2007, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LuvMyPrinceKobi

I have two more comments....one on the crate...yes, it should be a haven, and trust me when I say, "crate," Kobi could not be ANY happier to go to his little room...he loves it...so it is possible, trust me. It may take work, but you can do it, girl.

So how did you get your dog to love his little home? I'll buy anything, do anything to have a place where Tbone feels safe and comfortable.

jp4m2 · 09-05-2007, 12:53 PM

Wow!...There's a lot going on here...first you complained about the treatment of your pet and how upset you where with his behavior of throwing the dog into the shower...if this was a one time event and he is genuinely remorseful then maybe it should be forgiven...but if this is an escalating or continuing behavior then you are responsible for what happens to your pets by not protecting them, they are totally helpless in these kinds of situations....

There are trade off in all the decisions we make in life, I hear your complainants about your BF like, immature, rude, flippant, can't talk to him, etc. etc. but then the post start flying about how awful he is then the defenses and justifications kick in....

You really need to take a good look at what your really trying to save here...you have been in this for several years and the one constant in this is his rude attitude, then you say he may turn into some wonderful man some day...that is so sad to hear a woman say.....Be honest with yourself, dig a little deeper in why you stay and I'd wager it's more because of your fears, self doubts, avoidance to take responsibility for yourself, etc.....Select don't settle...you say you already have invested 4 years into this relationship...it may be that you have wasted four years.....The price tag you put on yourself will determine the value of the people and situations you'll pick and tolerate....

Men are here to share our lives, not be our lives....I hope for you and your pets sake this fairy tale has a happy ending...

Wylie's Mom · 09-05-2007, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jp4m2

The price tag you put on yourself will determine the value of the people and situations you'll pick and tolerate.

Shiver....that's good.

Jody Renfroe · 09-05-2007, 01:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom

Shiver....that's good.

Amen!! Wow!

celstu1 · 09-05-2007, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by labrown

So how did you get your dog to love his little home? I'll buy anything, do anything to have a place where Tbone feels safe and comfortable.

what about a little clock that ticks? It replicates the sound of their mothers heartbeat. I put one in the crate with my boys when they were babies and I didnt allow them on the bed yet for their own safety. I think it helped. I also covered the crate with a blanket over it as well as one in it. That helped a lot!

LuvMyPrinceKobi · 09-05-2007, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by labrown

So how did you get your dog to love his little home? I'll buy anything, do anything to have a place where Tbone feels safe and comfortable.

If he has a treat that he absolutely LOVES and cannot live without, then I say you make this treat ONLY for going in his crate. Every time we go to bed, Kobi KNOWS he gets a treat....only half, and it's not that much so it's perfect. But it happens EVERY single time without fail and so he knows it's GOOD that he's going in his crate. Also, put his favorite toy in there, a blanket, something that he really likes and feels comfortable with. I think after a few times with the treat it will really help! Good luck

jp4m2 · 09-05-2007, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom

Shiver....that's good.

....It just gets me when some women will see all the red flags of a relationship that's not great and then they stay because their afraid to be alone...then two kids later they finally see the light...so sad.....

Sometimes when you kiss a frog you get a prince.....and other times all you get is slimy lips.....

LoveMyJake · 09-05-2007, 01:31 PM

If I had a boyfriend who treated my dog like that, he would no longer be my boyfriend. You really need to think about whether you really want to spend your future with someone who could be so cruel to a tiny little dog. That was just plain mean, all because the dog was interrupting his sleep. What is he going to be like if the two of you decide to have a child?

I know you feel trapped, but do you have family and friends in another state? If not, I would get a job and move on. You can stay trapped or you can do something to help yourself. I've been in a relationship like that, only instead of dogs I had kids. I got out, and you can too. You have to be confident and stand up for yourself!

patty58 · 09-05-2007, 02:59 PM

My daughter just got out of a 3 year relationship that sounds just like yours...really nice guy, hard worker, really loved her and her kids....when everything went his way and he was getting the kind of attention HE needed. There were red flags all over...just like there are with you...but like you she didn't have a job and was a full time student. I won't get into what the last straw was but she finally left. She moved back in with us and has ups and downs, because she really cared for him but decided that she was worth more than him. Please, please think about whether you continue this relationship.

Sir Max · 09-05-2007, 03:22 PM

I to fell for a man just like yours and I to thought he would change, at that time things like temper, abuse and that was kept to ones self, and that created worse problems. If back then there had been doctors for Anger Management maybe what happened to me wouldnt have,maybe not. The one red flag I see that you should really address is Anger Management, NO_ONE should disipline, correct, or speak in anger, we are adults and we need to handle ourselves right. If he gets that tired ( and he will ) when you have children , What about him dunking your child in the shower. Also going to these classes will do you both good, and help your relationship. I think people should go to classes before they get married and maybe the divorce rate would be lower. If I had known the signs the day he killed my cat I would have left and five years later I would not have been left for dead in my apartment, after I left him.
You prayer real hard on this but outside help is needed and I hope you look into it.
I send prayers your way!

altigger74 · 09-05-2007, 03:56 PM

There is nothing I'm going to say about your relationship, It's tough when you need to vent about something and people only see the bad side not all the good, if I vented about my husband..........good grief..........he wouldn't even seem like a good person to me

but anyway, about the puppy what about getting a baby basinet that could be pulled up close to the bed and is the height of the bed and you can put your hand in it to quiet him. I had to do that when I had puppies here. It quieted them being able to smell and feel me but I could get comfortable too.

09-05-2007, 12:53 PM	#47
jp4m2 Love my Boys Donating Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: w/ my boys Posts: 5,056	Wow!...There's a lot going on here...first you complained about the treatment of your pet and how upset you where with his behavior of throwing the dog into the shower...if this was a one time event and he is genuinely remorseful then maybe it should be forgiven...but if this is an escalating or continuing behavior then you are responsible for what happens to your pets by not protecting them, they are totally helpless in these kinds of situations.... There are trade off in all the decisions we make in life, I hear your complainants about your BF like, immature, rude, flippant, can't talk to him, etc. etc. but then the post start flying about how awful he is then the defenses and justifications kick in.... You really need to take a good look at what your really trying to save here...you have been in this for several years and the one constant in this is his rude attitude, then you say he may turn into some wonderful man some day...that is so sad to hear a woman say.....Be honest with yourself, dig a little deeper in why you stay and I'd wager it's more because of your fears, self doubts, avoidance to take responsibility for yourself, etc.....Select don't settle...you say you already have invested 4 years into this relationship...it may be that you have wasted four years.....The price tag you put on yourself will determine the value of the people and situations you'll pick and tolerate.... Men are here to share our lives, not be our lives....I hope for you and your pets sake this fairy tale has a happy ending... __________________ B.J.mom to : Jake J.J. Jack & Joey, momma misses you..... The joy found in the companionship of a pet is a blessing not given to everyone. The two most powerful words when we’re in struggle: me too..

09-05-2007, 01:31 PM	#53
LoveMyJake I love Jackson too! Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Ohio Posts: 2,905	If I had a boyfriend who treated my dog like that, he would no longer be my boyfriend. You really need to think about whether you really want to spend your future with someone who could be so cruel to a tiny little dog. That was just plain mean, all because the dog was interrupting his sleep. What is he going to be like if the two of you decide to have a child? I know you feel trapped, but do you have family and friends in another state? If not, I would get a job and move on. You can stay trapped or you can do something to help yourself. I've been in a relationship like that, only instead of dogs I had kids. I got out, and you can too. You have to be confident and stand up for yourself! __________________ Selina, mommy to Jake and Jackson. RIP baby Lily Coming soon: Gracie

09-05-2007, 03:22 PM	#55
Sir Max Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: N.M. Posts: 159	I to fell for a man just like yours and I to thought he would change, at that time things like temper, abuse and that was kept to ones self, and that created worse problems. If back then there had been doctors for Anger Management maybe what happened to me wouldnt have,maybe not. The one red flag I see that you should really address is Anger Management, NO_ONE should disipline, correct, or speak in anger, we are adults and we need to handle ourselves right. If he gets that tired ( and he will ) when you have children , What about him dunking your child in the shower. Also going to these classes will do you both good, and help your relationship. I think people should go to classes before they get married and maybe the divorce rate would be lower. If I had known the signs the day he killed my cat I would have left and five years later I would not have been left for dead in my apartment, after I left him. You prayer real hard on this but outside help is needed and I hope you look into it. I send prayers your way! __________________ Syl- & Max

09-05-2007, 03:56 PM	#56
altigger74 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Alabama Posts: 1,523	There is nothing I'm going to say about your relationship, It's tough when you need to vent about something and people only see the bad side not all the good, if I vented about my husband..........good grief..........he wouldn't even seem like a good person to me but anyway, about the puppy what about getting a baby basinet that could be pulled up close to the bed and is the height of the bed and you can put your hand in it to quiet him. I had to do that when I had puppies here. It quieted them being able to smell and feel me but I could get comfortable too. __________________ Mommy of Cody,Gracie,Bella,2labs,1cat, 2 skinkids one Angel Baby Boy 8/8/09 I carried you under my heart for 20 weeks and will carry you in my heart forever

09-05-2007, 02:59 PM	#54
patty58 Donating YT 5000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: texas Posts: 5,272	My daughter just got out of a 3 year relationship that sounds just like yours...really nice guy, hard worker, really loved her and her kids....when everything went his way and he was getting the kind of attention HE needed. There were red flags all over...just like there are with you...but like you she didn't have a job and was a full time student. I won't get into what the last straw was but she finally left. She moved back in with us and has ups and downs, because she really cared for him but decided that she was worth more than him. Please, please think about whether you continue this relationship.