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Old 01-02-2013, 07:54 AM   #1
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Default I feel so bad I had to deny a lady that....

wanted to adopt my last puppy Pinky.. At first they seem like a great family for my puppy, she is very small, charting at only about 9 pounds fully grown,so I been super careful with the applications I had for her, this lady called me the day after Christmas looking to buy a puppy, I told her that Pinky is the only puppy I had left and and that I was expecting a litter of smaller yorkies in about feb or march, she wanted a silky because the wanted a little bigger dog than a yorkie, so we set an apt, she told me that she did not drive if I can come to her home, she lives about 5 towns away from me, so I agree to come yesterday since hubby was going to be home and could come with me, so when we arrived, we saw a beautiful home, well manicured and lovely, so we rang the bell and a lady in oxygen and with a walker answer the door , she said she was expecting us, so I asked her name and yes she was the lady, after talking for 10 minutes I knew that a puppy was going to be too much for her, specially one of my puppies that are so ramboucios , alert and active, they keep ME in my toes , I can't imagine her, dealing with a small puppy, I asked her if she had help during the day she said she had a nurse that came to help her with her meds a couple of hours a day, other than that she was alone all day,while her husband worked, then I suggested a rescue older dog to give her company, she told us that she was denied because of her condition from all the rescues in the metro NYC and NJ area, so sad, she did understand that I did not want to risk her not being able to keep up with the puppy, I felt so BAD, I still feel bad but I really do not think she can keep up with a young pup and I don't have any older dog I can adopt her at this point.. I hope I did the right thing, why do this shelter and rescues do not consider this type of people, I am sure an older dog will be VERY happy in this home, and it would help her immensely. she told me she just gave up and will be happy being around her sister's dog instead, so sad...
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:05 AM   #2
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wanted to adopt my last puppy Pinky.. At first they seem like a great family for my puppy, she is very small, charting at only about 9 pounds fully grown,so I been super careful with the applications I had for her, this lady called me the day after Christmas looking to buy a puppy, I told her that Pinky is the only puppy I had left and and that I was expecting a litter of smaller yorkies in about feb or march, she wanted a silky because the wanted a little bigger dog than a yorkie, so we set an apt, she told me that she did not drive if I can come to her home, she lives about 5 towns away from me, so I agree to come yesterday since hubby was going to be home and could come with me, so when we arrived, we saw a beautiful home, well manicured and lovely, so we rang the bell and a lady in oxygen and with a walker answer the door , she said she was expecting us, so I asked her name and yes she was the lady, after talking for 10 minutes I knew that a puppy was going to be too much for her, specially one of my puppies that are so ramboucios , alert and active, they keep ME in my toes , I can't imagine her, dealing with a small puppy, I asked her if she had help during the day she said she had a nurse that came to help her with her meds a couple of hours a day, other than that she was alone all day,while her husband worked, then I suggested a rescue older dog to give her company, she told us that she was denied because of her condition from all the rescues in the metro NYC and NJ area, so sad, she did understand that I did not want to risk her not being able to keep up with the puppy, I felt so BAD, I still feel bad but I really do not think she can keep up with a young pup and I don't have any older dog I can adopt her at this point.. I hope I did the right thing, why do this shelter and rescues do not consider this type of people, I am sure an older dog will be VERY happy in this home, and it would help her immensely. she told me she just gave up and will be happy being around her sister's dog instead, so sad...
I'll bet she can find an older, slower dog at the local "pound" and save a life, to boot. If nothing else, her husband could get the dog for her. She would probably dote on a dog in her condition - probably all she has to brighten her day would be a sweet doggie. But a puppy would likely do her in. Tibbe was 9 mos. old when I got him but he nearly killed me that first 3 weeks as he was totally wild. And I wasn't ill -I was just having the hip problem with a chronic back, nothing to do with breathing, oxygen, walkers, lots of meds, etc. I think you did the right thing for the lady and the dog. Often people want things they just can't handle or deal with but they can't see it themselves. But if you rely on a walker to get about, you can't really safely have a puppy in the home - not really. They get themselves into too many iffy situations you need to be able to move quickly and take decisive action and also don't need a dog if you can't get it to the vet in an emergency situation. But maybe she has a neighbor who never goes out or something to drive her.
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:10 AM   #3
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I would feel bad too BUT I also know that thank goodness I had another loving home to watch Guinness when he was around 6 months old and I dislocated my knee, they actually took both me and Guinness in, because there is NO WAY I could have done it!!!
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:18 AM   #4
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I know you did the right thing both for pinky and the lady. I went through gallbladder surgery the week after I got Wallee and let me tell you, the following 4 weeks after that were killer for me trying to transition him to his new home and potty train him. Taking him outside on a leash ever hour I thought I would die.
I am amazed at how difficult the rescues make it for people. I toyed with the thought of that before getting Wallee as all 4 of my cats are rescues but even having a full time job basically disqualified me. Ridiculous. The cat rescue places actually had someone come to my home to pick up a kitten they adopted to me who was very ill. (she was taken to the pet store to be shown for adoption too young and since the foster mom's husband was a vet they took her back till she got stronger). The lady was thrilled with the home I was giving the kitties but..... The dog rescues won't even consider.
I hope some day I can get a sister for Wallee and I love the bigger size too. That's why I got the Brewer. Wallee is 10 lbs at 9 months so I think he is probably full grown.
too bad you didn't live closer for when I'm ready.
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:25 AM   #5
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you did the right thing and if you find an older dog that might fit at least maybe in the future you can keep her in mind. its sad but you have to do what is best for your babies. well done.
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:35 AM   #6
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Oh you did the right thing. I just have to think of how active remy was...she could play with bailey for hours on end. I always told my dh I was so glad bailey was such a good nanny.

But on the other had, she does need a dog. I am thinking a golden ..a sweet larger low activity level dog to take care of her. Maybe you could help her find one because you are in the area?

I was turned down by a rescue ..because I said I would crate a puppy when I wasnt home.? The main lady felt that it was dangerous to crate puppies. I think she just wanted to keep the pups...which I totally understand.
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Old 01-02-2013, 08:40 AM   #7
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thank you ladies, I know I did right, is just that my heart is heavy, I know she needs a dog and the thing is she does not want a big dog, she wants a smaller size dog, and the rescues and even our local pound is reluctant to adopt her according to what she said, and I feel so bad for her.. sometimes I don't understand the shelter rules..
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Old 01-02-2013, 10:15 AM   #8
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I'll bet she can find an older, slower dog at the local "pound" and save a life, to boot. If nothing else, her husband could get the dog for her. She would probably dote on a dog in her condition - probably all she has to brighten her day would be a sweet doggie. But a puppy would likely do her in. Tibbe was 9 mos. old when I got him but he nearly killed me that first 3 weeks as he was totally wild. And I wasn't ill -I was just having the hip problem with a chronic back, nothing to do with breathing, oxygen, walkers, lots of meds, etc. I think you did the right thing for the lady and the dog. Often people want things they just can't handle or deal with but they can't see it themselves. But if you rely on a walker to get about, you can't really safely have a puppy in the home - not really. They get themselves into too many iffy situations you need to be able to move quickly and take decisive action and also don't need a dog if you can't get it to the vet in an emergency situation. But maybe she has a neighbor who never goes out or something to drive her.
I agree, it's really easy to get a dog at the pound. Their inventory changes weekly.
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Old 01-02-2013, 10:30 AM   #9
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I know you feel horrible. I hope she will find the perfect pup for her.

NOW, let me say this about Rescues. The Rescue Group I volunteer with, we did adopt a 1 1/2 old Male Yorkie to a couple. She uses a wheelchair when she doesn't have her leg prothesis on. They do have another Yorkie who is 5 yrs old. She manages very well. I myself did the 1st Home Visit and then the Foster Mom did as well. WE both felt comfortable with this home. BUT about two weeks after she adopted Chewy he some how got out of the house and she has no idea how it happened.

Chewy has been missing for over 2 1/2 months now. We have followed up on all leads in regards to him, I have been to many shelters just to check on male yorkies that are brought in. Chewy is micro chipped. I just pray that some one has him and is being treated good.

I blame my self at times, thinking I made a wrong judgement.

This adoptive Mom is beyound distraught. I talk with her at least once a week.
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Old 01-02-2013, 10:33 AM   #10
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I know how difficult that must have been for you, how uncomfortable, I am often torn when I hear of an older or unhealthy person getting a pup...recently my mom's cat died and she wanted another one right away...my mom is terminally ill...I know her time here is shortened...I found a group here that gives cats to foster to old folks and then takes them back IF/When something happens. Luckily for me my Vet gave my mom one of her cats with the understanding that should something happen she will take him back...I felt very good about that.

I know they are therapeutic but it seems so unfair to put a home "temporarily" or risk its care because of circumstances like you witnessed....I love the elderly folks so much and no how loving they are....but I'm glad I don't have to make these types of decisions.

I think you made the right choice and I'm sure she knows and understands, just sorry you had to be put in that situation....maybe you go visit from time to time with a dog or 2???
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Old 01-02-2013, 11:05 AM   #11
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I understand why you feel bad. But you did right thing not only for pup but for the lady. Her hubby needs to get her a older dog. Or maybe even a cat. Their totally self sufficient yet are good companions for Ill or elderly. My MIL has 2cats for companionship. Doesn't have to walk them. She said its the best thing she's done. She was always a dog person before.
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Old 01-02-2013, 02:46 PM   #12
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Carmen you have such a big heart! And of course you made the right decision for this puppy at this time.

It may come about through your breeder friends that they have an older dog they would like to place; and voila you have already been to the home and met the woman.

And I think for this woman a smaller dog is best. Even with a walker, she could pick up a 10lber dog, and get herself and pup in a cab to take to a vet in case of emergency.

Also the dog could go into a purse carrier.

When I broke my leg, I had already agreed to babysit a young BRT who at six months old and about 70lbs was a young and active boy. He came to us for what was to be one week and ended up about one month of time.

He got crate trained very fast, and all the dogs and cats slept with me in the garden room which was on a level that had no stairs. Magic pulled me in my wheelchair (learnt that in about 20 minutes). All the dogs knew not to jump up on Mom's bed. I "exercised them one at a time - by throwing a ball from my bed out into the back yard.

I of course rotated the dogs in and out of crates, until Rufus had settled into our home.

I had a dog walker come in about 4 days a week for a nice walk for all. And hubby did evening walks.

I also had 2-3 back up emergency help folks if I needed to get any dog to the vet FAST.

All this to say that with planning almost anything can be surmounted.
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Old 01-02-2013, 03:34 PM   #13
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You did the right thing. I think maybe that woman might benefit by getting a cat. They are indoors. You do not have to walk them. They snuggle up to you. Just a lap cat.
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Old 01-02-2013, 04:15 PM   #14
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well I emailed her with the cat suggestions, she is allergic to cats, go figure, now I feel worse.. .. hubby said I take others problems at heart too fast, I guess so but I can't help it... I also put the word in all my breeder and dogs groups, hopefully someone has a retired breeder dog or older dog for her, I am so hoping..
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Old 01-02-2013, 04:22 PM   #15
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well I emailed her with the cat suggestions, she is allergic to cats, go figure, now I feel worse.. .. hubby said I take others problems at heart too fast, I guess so but I can't help it... I also put the word in all my breeder and dogs groups, hopefully someone has a retired breeder dog or older dog for her, I am so hoping..
hugs,
Such a big heart Carmen. My breeder friends have large dogs and or we are way way too far from you for a placement.
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