Just depressed

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by chachi

I lost my Mom 11 years ago and my life has never been the same either. And its funny that you say you dream about your Dad because my Mom is in about all of my dreams. The best thing I can tell you is join a church or a club or something and make friends. It is when we feel very alone that we get depressed.

((hugs)) I am sorry about your loss. I have dreams about my Dad, but it isnt all the time. So when I do have them they are special.

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by QuickSilver

I'm sorry you're feeling unhappy. I haven't lost a parent, but loss and separation are the hardest things we humans endure. There are so many layers to loss, most of them bad, unfortunately. I hear you describing the loss of him in your thoughts, and that is sad in its own way.

I do think the best way to honor someone is to remember their love and honor their wish for you to be happy, though I have trouble doing that myself sometimes.

Thank You! It is very hard. I have trouble with it, like yourself it is easier said than done. Life is hard we just have to keep trucking! I know my Dad doesn't want to see me unhappy, I try to think that way.. I really do, but it is so hard!

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by jmdt

I lost my dad 4 years ago this past July. No one knows the special bond that a father has with his daughter and visa versa. Not unless you are one. The pain is immeasurable. I think of him all the time. You know what I do is whenever I see a butterfly I think it's him flying by me. I know it's weird but the day he died I bought a butterfly bush and it attracts tons of butterflies. It is very hard to live without him. He truly was everything to me. Just never, ever forget those special times you had with him. I speak of him often to my kids, and we laugh. I get down every now and then and cry, and it's ok to cry. It is a very deep sorrow that never, ever will go away. My daddy lives in my heart and I just know we will be together again. What gets me through is that I know he would be sad if he knew I was miserable or sad. I just keep saying, "I'm ok", I would never want to make him sad. He is with my mom and they have eachother, so I feel better knowing they are not alone.
I wish you well and I am truly sorry about your dads passing. Keep your chin up and continue to make him proud.

I lost my Dad July 16 2002, but before that I lost my Grandparents (Mom's parents) then a little after my Dad passed I lost my Grandpa on my Dad's side. I lost all of them in less than a year.

I am sorry for your loss ((hugs)). I know, nobody understands the close bond. My Dad and I were so close. I think that is beautiful about the butterfiles... I think we just have to hold on to anything that reminds us of them. I use to lay on my Dad's chest when I was young ( @ 13-15ish) I would listen to his heart beat.. The other day out of nowhere I was laying on my DH ( I hardly do esp on his chest) I was laying on his chest and all of a sudden I heard his heart beat, I swear I thought I was laying on my Dad! It freaked me out and I got up, DH was kinda startled and was like what is wrong... I told him LoL I kinda creeped him out a little, but he understood. It was really strange bc I never have layed on DH, I mean we snuggle and stuff but never once layed on his chest like I use to do with my Dad and at the time I was doing it I didnt realize it!

My Mom will sometimes smile at my Brother or myself and will tell us that we remind her of our Dad. They just had celebrated their 25th anniversary. They were so in love, and never faught. I had such a wonderful childhood, The best parents I could have asked for. My Dad was an amazing Father and an amazing person in general. Ughh ok I am getting teary eyed!!

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by Britster

Girl, if you ever need to talk, I am here. I can't imagine losing my dad, I am so close to him. But I did lose my little brother, who I was super close to, he was 5 when he died and I often have days where I am just sooo blah. I can't stop thinking about him, I can't sleep, I just get in a funk some times and I won't even know why until I suddenly realize I either see something that reminds me of Connor, or it's day significant to him, etc. He died in June and his birthday was in July so those two months I'm generally really down.

On those days, I have to get myself out and about. I can't just sit at home as much as I want to. I take advantage of having a dog and usually just take him to the dog park, or go for a long walk, anything to get my mind off the pain. Though I will say, some days I almost "enjoy" just letting out a good cry. I hold stuff in a lot so I have a few nights a year where I just cry... and let it all out... and it does help.

Oh and whoever says time heals all wounds never has experienced such a painful loss, IMO. Sure, it may EASE up over time... but time, IMO, does not heal anything. You really just learn to live with it. I've come to realize dying is a part of life but it sure doesn't make it any easier.

I am here for you if you need to talk.

LoL You are so funny, your avatar made me smile! I love Tom Hanks too! All I can say to you is keep your Father close, never take that love for granted! I know you talk about your Father like I did mine, I can tell you have a very close realtionship. ((hugs)) to you as well. I know you lost a brother, I lost My Grandparents on my Mom's side, My Dad and my Grandpa ( Dad's side) all less than a year it was so hard... Loosing my Dad was the worse feeling Brit. A Daughter always needs their Dad, you feel lost without them. I have one brother and I love him to death. I cant imaging the pain you are in. I am so sorry you were delt with that. Im sure your brother is above you as your Angel. I know you just posted a thread a little bit ago about missing him. ((hugs)) I am here for you as well! I know it helps talking to people who have lost people.. So dont hesitate to Pm me!

I think the days you see something that reminds you of him, that means he is around you. I really do. I hold a lot in too, I do the same thing. I will be fine for half of the year, and then WHAMO I will just break down somewhere!! It probably isnt what you should do, but Oh well.

I agree with its something that we have to live with. Its not that we can deal with it, its that we have to! I guess we all have eachother for the times we are down. All the people in this thread have really helped me! We should have a in memory for people on here!!

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by TxVicki

I am so sorry you are feeling depressed. I do know how you feel. I lost my Mom 18 years ago and I still to this day go to the phone to call her and of course my Daddy answers the phone. I dread the day I loose my Daddy, I know I will go insane. I have gotten so close to my Daddy since my Mom passed.

Just know you can come here and talk. I'm here for you also.

Thank you! I am sorry for your loss. It doesnt matter on how long its been, its still hurts like it was yesterday.

[Wylie's Mom]

I'm so sorry . It's so hard to lose a parent - and the feelings are so unpredictable. I lost my Mom 22 years ago when I was 21. It is easier now, but for the first several, several years - it was up and down. You're not alone in the up and down and the loneliness. Know I'm thinking of you.

[darnlora]

The pain that comes with loss is awful the memories and the comfort that one day you will see him again makes it almost bearable but pain and sadness can last forever......losing your dad is very hard when you are daddy's girl. My father has been gone since 1978 I remember it just like it was yesterday its been 33 years I was 22 years old. Oh but the memories they make me smile I adored him so. Smile and know he remains with you everyday he's in the best parts of you! Hugs try not to be sad I know easier said than done!

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom

I'm so sorry . It's so hard to lose a parent - and the feelings are so unpredictable. I lost my Mom 22 years ago when I was 21. It is easier now, but for the first several, several years - it was up and down. You're not alone in the up and down and the loneliness. Know I'm thinking of you.

Im sorry for your loss, ((hugs)) You were 2 years older than I was.. When does it get easier, I mean I am going on 9 years and it still hurts so bad!

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by darnlora

The pain that comes with loss is awful the memories and the comfort that one day you will see him again makes it almost bearable but pain and sadness can last forever......losing your dad is very hard when you are daddy's girl. My father has been gone since 1978 I remember it just like it was yesterday its been 33 years I was 22 years old. Oh but the memories they make me smile I adored him so. Smile and know he remains with you everyday he's in the best parts of you! Hugs try not to be sad I know easier said than done!

HUGS to you too! Thank you for the kinds words! Im sorry for your loss as well.

[citygirl123]

I am so sorry for your loss and that you are still suffering. My dad passed away on August 29. The funeral is next Monday. It takes soooo long for them to process everything anymore. I feel like I am in limbo waiting for it to be over. I live in Riverside too. My dad will be buried at the National Cemetary. My brother and I have been driving back and forth from Riverside to Rancho Mirage ever since he had his stroke on July 6th. It was only 2 months, but it seemed a like a long time because of the drive and watching him deal with the stroke and the other serious issues. I understand your loss and will miss my dad too. But I'm glad he is not suffering or limited by his body. He would have hated living like that. I will pray for you to be at peace with your dad's death.

[Ahis_Mama]

*HUGS* I know it's virtual but it's sent with the same amount of love!

[My lil friend]

I am so sorry that you have such pain. I was/am a daddys girl. I miss my dad alot,he passed in 2008 and I was waaaay over 40 so I was blessed to be with him a long time. He was very ill for 5yrs and I only really got to spend time with him when he went to the hospital. He was my one stable parent and aside from mom and 2brothers I didn't have any other family that lived any closer than 1000 miles.
I do miss him,sometimes I go sit on my back porch and think about him and the things that he taught me about life. One life lesson was that you can not live in the past. I have tried to move on. The reason that I help care for my mother is because I promised him that I would.
There are things in my house that belonged to him,even a toy or two from his childhood. These things seem to help.
I hope that your sadness will pass and only the good feelings and memories will fill its place.

[shodanusmc]

All I can say is the pain will lessen over time. Lost my Mom almost 4 years ago so I understand. It is ok to be happy! !5 years ago I thought I would never smile again, or enjoy life. I do try to enjoy life, friends and family, and know it is good to have fun, but not a day foes by without remembering. We all get depressed. If you feel depressed in another month, see your Doc. There is help. There are also many good support groups. Compassionate Friends helped us with the loss of our daughter, but not until we were ready for the help.

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by citygirl123

I am so sorry for your loss and that you are still suffering. My dad passed away on August 29. The funeral is next Monday. It takes soooo long for them to process everything anymore. I feel like I am in limbo waiting for it to be over. I live in Riverside too. My dad will be buried at the National Cemetary. My brother and I have been driving back and forth from Riverside to Rancho Mirage ever since he had his stroke on July 6th. It was only 2 months, but it seemed a like a long time because of the drive and watching him deal with the stroke and the other serious issues. I understand your loss and will miss my dad too. But I'm glad he is not suffering or limited by his body. He would have hated living like that. I will pray for you to be at peace with your dad's death.

I am so sorry for your loss (( big hug)) to you. The hardest part for me was to go to the funeral. It was so hard. I will be praying and thinking of you, I pray God comforts you and your family right now. If you ever need anything please let me know, Just to talk even. I went thru so many emotions after my Dad's funeral, it is so hard to know how you are going to react. I am off Pierce/River walk in Riverside.

May your Dad rest in peace.. I will be thinking of you.

[lovespandp]

Originally Posted by My lil friend

I am so sorry that you have such pain. I was/am a daddys girl. I miss my dad alot,he passed in 2008 and I was waaaay over 40 so I was blessed to be with him a long time. He was very ill for 5yrs and I only really got to spend time with him when he went to the hospital. He was my one stable parent and aside from mom and 2brothers I didn't have any other family that lived any closer than 1000 miles.
I do miss him,sometimes I go sit on my back porch and think about him and the things that he taught me about life. One life lesson was that you can not live in the past. I have tried to move on. The reason that I help care for my mother is because I promised him that I would.
There are things in my house that belonged to him,even a toy or two from his childhood. These things seem to help.
I hope that your sadness will pass and only the good feelings and memories will fill its place.

Thank you, I am sorry for your loss as well. I think at any age loosing a parent is hard. For me I think it is harder bc I only had him for 20 years... I feel it was cut too short, He still had a lot of stuff to teach me, I still had a lot of stuff to talk to him about, advice to get... That is the hard part.