Omg my heart just shattered i need help - Page 6 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

cariblonde · 03-13-2008, 10:07 AM

I dont think he put them on there witht he intention of me finding them b/c he is trying to deny they are even him, I mean come on I've been his wife for ten years I know what his body looks like, I told him tuesday night after i found those i wanted a divorce and i feel like that is the right decision for me

I think he has a porn addiction that led to this, I have turned my head for a while now when i would see in the browser history teen porn sites and credit card charges for hotlines and porn chat I think the photos were used for his profile on one of the sites... I cant access his page b/c I dont know his password and user name but I could tell what kind of site it was its like match.com but instead of romantic relationships its used solely for (well you know) I have just put up with too much over the past 10 years including an affair with a 15 year old girl (that was a loong time ago i was only 17 at the time) but i thought we had moved on from all that and were finally going to make it work

Sookie · 03-13-2008, 10:11 AM

I'm so sorry. My daughter is currently going through a painful divorce, so I know how hard this must be for you. I hope everything works out ok.

mechchic3 · 03-13-2008, 10:11 AM

So sorry I've been following this thread since first post and was so hoping that it wasn't those type of pics. Hugs to you sweety this too shall pass. I am here for you

KiKiPie · 03-13-2008, 10:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cariblonde

I dont think he put them on there witht he intention of me finding them b/c he is trying to deny they are even him, I mean come on I've been his wife for ten years I know what his body looks like, I told him tuesday night after i found those i wanted a divorce and i feel like that is the right decision for me

I think he has a porn addiction that led to this, I have turned my head for a while now when i would see in the browser history teen porn sites and credit card charges for hotlines and porn chat I think the photos were used for his profile on one of the sites... I cant access his page b/c I dont know his password and user name but I could tell what kind of site it was its like match.com but instead of romantic relationships its used solely for (well you know) I have just put up with too much over the past 10 years including an affair with a 15 year old girl (that was a loong time ago i was only 17 at the time) but i thought we had moved on from all that and were finally going to make it work

My heart is breaking for you. I know how devestating this can be. This exact thing has not happened to me, but something similar. Put this terrible thing you are going through in the Lord's hands. He will take care of you and bring you out of it. Please pm if you want to talk. I am always here for you.

For My Coby · 03-13-2008, 10:16 AM

I, like everyone else here, is so sorry this has happened to you. It's one of a woman's worst nightmares. Please heed some of the advice you've received and do not allow your emotions (hurt, anger, embarrassment) to rule your decisions ("what" to do). Divorce may or may not be the best thing, but even if it is, you will want that divorce to not leave any more scars than it has to. So don't be too reactive (as nearly impossible as I know that must be).

If there is an actual addiction (in the clinical definition) involved, then there truly is help out there - for both of you - no matter what you decide to do with your marriage.

I am hugging you soooooooooo hard right now. If one day at a time is too much, let's just concentrate on minute to minute. You do have to breathe. Gosh I wish I could help you more.

Hugs, Diane

Yorkie Luv of 3 · 03-13-2008, 10:17 AM

you just keep crossing my mind,, and with your last posting,, i'd say he "wanted" to be caught,, found out,, it happens sometimes,, and only you ,, in your heart of hearts,, will know what you have to do,, what you can and cannot handle, ,an unfaithful spouse is NOT an easy thing to deal with or forgive,, and trust me,, you'll never forget!,, forgive you can do ,, if you want to hard enough,, and HE wants hard enough to do whats right and prove himself to your heart,, I wish you Peace and Strength!! just know we're here for ya,,{{{{{{{{{{Big Hugs!}}}}}}}}}}

MICKEYK · 03-13-2008, 10:19 AM

so sorry your going through this sending hugs your way.i sure hope you didnt have your name on those credit cards and if so call and get them cancelled
before it ends up costing you even more hurt buy getting the bills

we are all here for you

~Yorkie~Mommy~ · 03-13-2008, 10:26 AM

I too am soo sorry all of this happened to you....I just sent you a PM.

mizzwanned · 03-13-2008, 10:28 AM

wow i am soo truly sorry

I don't know how men think they can get away with things sometimes. 10 yrs is a long time, why would he even try to lie? I hope you get thru this and i will pray for you. I know how difficult it is

littlewhip · 03-13-2008, 10:44 AM

Iam so so sorry, My heart is tearing up for you, we are all here for you, You deserve better hun, really you do,my thoughts and prayers are with you.....hugs..Iam truly sorry

chloeandj · 03-13-2008, 10:50 AM

I hope you take some time to get your head together and move on to a wonderful future, that you deserve. 10 years is a long time to put up with that. It can't be good for your self esteem, just know it isn't your fault and I think most any woman would agree that it isn't right to stay with someone who does these things to his wife. Not to mention what he might be bringing home to you.

tjdmom · 03-13-2008, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cariblonde

I dont think he put them on there witht he intention of me finding them b/c he is trying to deny they are even him, I mean come on I've been his wife for ten years I know what his body looks like, I told him tuesday night after i found those i wanted a divorce and i feel like that is the right decision for me

I think he has a porn addiction that led to this, I have turned my head for a while now when i would see in the browser history teen porn sites and credit card charges for hotlines and porn chat I think the photos were used for his profile on one of the sites... I cant access his page b/c I dont know his password and user name but I could tell what kind of site it was its like match.com but instead of romantic relationships its used solely for (well you know) I have just put up with too much over the past 10 years including an affair with a 15 year old girl (that was a loong time ago i was only 17 at the time) but i thought we had moved on from all that and were finally going to make it work

Wow! You deserve way better IMHO! I don't blame you one bit.

tnpowell · 03-13-2008, 11:00 AM

I am so sorry to hear this sweetie, right know you need to put your marriage if not already in God's hands. You have been with your spouse for 10 years. No way and no how am I saying you should put up with his mess, because you should not have to. I would address the issue to him and seek counseling for his behavior. Try this before jumping into a divorce. Work through your problems. If there are alot of other things going on and you are to that point you feel you are giving more and not receiving or it is just weighing you down to a point you feel like your not yourself than this relationship my be unhealthy for you. Girl pray about it and keep praying. I feel for your hurt and am hear for you.

cariblonde · 03-13-2008, 11:18 AM

I am going to my dr tomorrow to get somethig to help me sleep..... plus some medical tests

I just cant believe this....

tnpowell · 03-13-2008, 11:23 AM

Also talk to him/her about what you are feeling and get a referal to talk with someone or maybe your family priest or pastor. Watch out taking a sedative to help sleep taking it along with how your feeling right know. Talking to your physician is a good step. Take it easy and believe me pray. I know how you feel loving someone and trusting them to get hurt.

03-13-2008, 10:07 AM	#76
cariblonde Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: wilmington nc Posts: 1,585	I dont think he put them on there witht he intention of me finding them b/c he is trying to deny they are even him, I mean come on I've been his wife for ten years I know what his body looks like, I told him tuesday night after i found those i wanted a divorce and i feel like that is the right decision for me I think he has a porn addiction that led to this, I have turned my head for a while now when i would see in the browser history teen porn sites and credit card charges for hotlines and porn chat I think the photos were used for his profile on one of the sites... I cant access his page b/c I dont know his password and user name but I could tell what kind of site it was its like match.com but instead of romantic relationships its used solely for (well you know) I have just put up with too much over the past 10 years including an affair with a 15 year old girl (that was a loong time ago i was only 17 at the time) but i thought we had moved on from all that and were finally going to make it work __________________ Proud Member of the Spoiled Rotten Club and in the end, its not the years in your life that count but the life in your years.... Abraham Lincoln

03-13-2008, 10:11 AM	#77
Sookie My Four Sweet Babies Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: South Jersey near Philadelphia Posts: 5,452	I'm so sorry. My daughter is currently going through a painful divorce, so I know how hard this must be for you. I hope everything works out ok. __________________ I LOVE MY BABIES

03-13-2008, 10:11 AM	#78
mechchic3 Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Tampa Posts: 531	So sorry I've been following this thread since first post and was so hoping that it wasn't those type of pics. Hugs to you sweety this too shall pass. I am here for you __________________ Sophie& Rambo Rambo proud member of "The Little Gentlemen's Club"

03-13-2008, 10:16 AM	#80
For My Coby Donating YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Illinois Posts: 4,139	I, like everyone else here, is so sorry this has happened to you. It's one of a woman's worst nightmares. Please heed some of the advice you've received and do not allow your emotions (hurt, anger, embarrassment) to rule your decisions ("what" to do). Divorce may or may not be the best thing, but even if it is, you will want that divorce to not leave any more scars than it has to. So don't be too reactive (as nearly impossible as I know that must be). If there is an actual addiction (in the clinical definition) involved, then there truly is help out there - for both of you - no matter what you decide to do with your marriage. I am hugging you soooooooooo hard right now. If one day at a time is too much, let's just concentrate on minute to minute. You do have to breathe. Gosh I wish I could help you more. Hugs, Diane __________________ Diane, and my boys ..... Coby and Reggie !! Striving to be a YTPP - a YT Positive Poster! In Memory of My Beautiful Mother 7/22/28-8/27/08 Last edited by For My Coby; 03-13-2008 at 10:21 AM.

03-13-2008, 10:17 AM	#81
Yorkie Luv of 3 Ayla now makes it 4!!! Donating Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Louisiana(home) & Texas(work) Posts: 1,711	you just keep crossing my mind,, and with your last posting,, i'd say he "wanted" to be caught,, found out,, it happens sometimes,, and only you ,, in your heart of hearts,, will know what you have to do,, what you can and cannot handle, ,an unfaithful spouse is NOT an easy thing to deal with or forgive,, and trust me,, you'll never forget!,, forgive you can do ,, if you want to hard enough,, and HE wants hard enough to do whats right and prove himself to your heart,, I wish you Peace and Strength!! just know we're here for ya,,{{{{{{{{{{Big Hugs!}}}}}}}}}} __________________ Cricket~Proud Petite Pup! Daisy~Proud TeaPot!! & Trixie ~Texas Girl & Ayla~Cherokee Baby! Yorkies!!! What's Not to Love!

03-13-2008, 10:19 AM	#82
MICKEYK BANNED FOR STEALING YORKIETALK CONTENT! Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: MI Posts: 2,052	so sorry your going through this sending hugs your way.i sure hope you didnt have your name on those credit cards and if so call and get them cancelled before it ends up costing you even more hurt buy getting the billswe are all here for you

03-13-2008, 10:26 AM	#83
~Yorkie~Mommy~ Donating YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Louisiana Posts: 3,933	I too am soo sorry all of this happened to you....I just sent you a PM. __________________ ~Christina~ Our human baby girl is HERE!! Luvin' My Prince Bailey Bailey's Dogster Page Bailey 's Gracie

03-13-2008, 10:28 AM	#84
mizzwanned Donating YT 11K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: new york Posts: 14,007 Blog Entries: 2	wow i am soo truly sorry I don't know how men think they can get away with things sometimes. 10 yrs is a long time, why would he even try to lie? I hope you get thru this and i will pray for you. I know how difficult it is __________________ Primrose, Teddy..RIP, Livie..RIP, And can never forget my duo Sophie and London, Run in Peace <3

03-13-2008, 10:44 AM	#85
littlewhip Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: wiith my furbabys Posts: 8,874	Iam so so sorry, My heart is tearing up for you, we are all here for you, You deserve better hun, really you do,my thoughts and prayers are with you.....hugs..Iam truly sorry __________________

03-13-2008, 10:50 AM	#86
chloeandj Tinkerbell, My Little Flutterpup Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Beautiful California! Posts: 6,112	I hope you take some time to get your head together and move on to a wonderful future, that you deserve. 10 years is a long time to put up with that. It can't be good for your self esteem, just know it isn't your fault and I think most any woman would agree that it isn't right to stay with someone who does these things to his wife. Not to mention what he might be bringing home to you.

03-13-2008, 11:00 AM	#88
tnpowell BANNED for Not Sending a Gift Exchange Gift Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Dixon, Mo Posts: 340	I am so sorry to hear this sweetie, right know you need to put your marriage if not already in God's hands. You have been with your spouse for 10 years. No way and no how am I saying you should put up with his mess, because you should not have to. I would address the issue to him and seek counseling for his behavior. Try this before jumping into a divorce. Work through your problems. If there are alot of other things going on and you are to that point you feel you are giving more and not receiving or it is just weighing you down to a point you feel like your not yourself than this relationship my be unhealthy for you. Girl pray about it and keep praying. I feel for your hurt and am hear for you.

03-13-2008, 11:18 AM	#89
cariblonde Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: wilmington nc Posts: 1,585	I am going to my dr tomorrow to get somethig to help me sleep..... plus some medical tests I just cant believe this.... __________________ Proud Member of the Spoiled Rotten Club and in the end, its not the years in your life that count but the life in your years.... Abraham Lincoln

03-13-2008, 11:23 AM	#90
tnpowell BANNED for Not Sending a Gift Exchange Gift Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Dixon, Mo Posts: 340	Also talk to him/her about what you are feeling and get a referal to talk with someone or maybe your family priest or pastor. Watch out taking a sedative to help sleep taking it along with how your feeling right know. Talking to your physician is a good step. Take it easy and believe me pray. I know how you feel loving someone and trusting them to get hurt.