Could really use some opinions

[fasteddie]

I'm sorry to hear of your situation, Villette. Yorkie babies always bring smiles and joy to people that see them, maybe he wants that joy around him all the time. I don't know how long he has to live (nor would I ask), but if it is not too long, perhaps he just wants his days filled with that pure love a puppy can bring. If you have any close family members or friends, perhaps consider co-raising a Yorkie puppy? It is sort of an oddball suggestion, as I would know that everyone would immediately fall in love with the puppy and it would be hard to share. But if long-term the family member or friend took over complete parental duties, that may be what you are perhaps looking for...

Good luck whatever you decide, it is a very difficult choice, I'm sure you'll make the decision that is right with your family.

[StewiesMom]

Originally Posted by Trevor's Mom

the middle child is always "last", if you know what I mean.
Trevor's Mom

Not if you're the only girl!

Vilette - I'm sorry about your husband. I know you've said you've been struggling with it for a long time. Though it sounds cold, my advice would be "do what YOU want to do" especially since you are not sure how long your husband is going to be with us. He will understand your decision. Hugs to you and your family.

[natalie]

Originally Posted by Meg

"Money comes, money goes, and there are countless ways to spend it. But the memories you make and the people (animals ) you share it with lasts forever and is what makes life worth living."

Meg-- That is such a great quote.

Vilette--
I'm so sorry to hear about your husband and what he is going through. I will keep him in my thoughts and prayers. I know that it must be a very difficult time for you and a very difficult decision to make. I, personally, would advise that you just sit him down and talk to him about it. It could be a totally different reason than what you originally thought of why he wants the puppy. Perhaps, he sees how you are always on Yorkie forums, how you always speak about your gorgeous babies, how much you love them and how all-in-all.. you love puppies and dogs. Maybe, it could be that the puppy isn't for him but he wants to see you happy and worry-free. I know that you guys are uncertain of when or even if he is passing away. It could be that he doesn't want you to think about him passing or how much time he has left and the only way to do that is to replace it with the thing that you love second best.. your passion for dogs. It would ease the pain and deter any bad thoughts just to occupy the both of you.
Your husband sounds like such a caring guy and you seem like such a selfless person. If you do have the extra money for another puppy's vet bills, I would consider getting another one because it will make you happy, and it will make your husband happier to see you happy. My belief is that happiness outweighs anything else in life. And it makes happiness even greater when everyone loves everything else unconditionally.
Like fasteddie said, perhaps you could get family and friends involved and if, at any time, three dogs gets a little too much for you they will be willing to watch over them for a little bit while you get everything together.
I hope my reply helped. And I will be praying for you, Vilette. I think you deserve another puppy. And I think your husband would love to see you smile, laugh, tell him funny stories and be happy as would all of us.

[JUDY's2yorkies]

I have already come up with a great idea, could you find a breeder that would allow you the puppy and if it becomes too much at a later time take puppy back, I know that if you were in my area of the country I would do it in a heart beat, sometimes there are more answers than come up at first, maybe like "borrow a puppy" sence I don't know whats wrong with your husband, but I am sorry anyway that might be a way to go, like the opposite of "breeding rights",more like borrow rights, I know you would be a great home,yet you also have to take care of your needs now and in the future,just another idea

[red98vett]

WOW - I wish I did this sooner ! Thank you so much for these really great posts and sharing your experiences....There were some things I just read that really make so much sense.... and I want to say that you all posted some beautiful thoughts here in this thread - I can honestly say there are some pretty special people here -

I was hoping to be able to look at this differently and these responses really have got me thinking in a new way -

Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts on this - I know it's pretty personal what I posted....but it's been weighing on my mind and I feel like a small weight just lifted - You've been a huge help - Thank you !

[tarawood]

Ohhh My, Villette, I'm so sorry about your hubby. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. You are such a wonderful person, I know God has a special place for you and those you love.

About the puppy, I would let him have one. It may be just what he needs to give him an extra boost and put a smile on his face. Maybe you can truly let it be "his puppy" in that he does a lot of the care for it as well. You would be amazed at what joy and fullfillness caring for a puppy can bring to some people.

I have a story to tell you, and it's long, so I'll give you the abridged version: When my grandmother was very ill, she kept pushing for a puppy (not any particular kind, just a puppy) and we were thinking how are we going to take care of her and a puppy too?? Well, one of her friends actually got her the puppy and gave it to her, and some people in my family were really upset. But by the end of the week, she was doing so much better, she was even getting out of the bed to feed the puppy and to let it outside and she hadn't gotten up in 2 months. Then we all wish we would've gotten her one sooner. I truly think that it is that pup that made her turn the corner and fight the cancer and has kept her alive today. I know this sounds wierd, but its almost as if she felt needed by her puppy and that gave her a reason to keep going. Anyway, I guess that is why my response to your questions is what it is.

I know it will be harder for you to care for three than 2, but we never truly know what we are capable of until we try.

[ReconsMomma]

Villette.

I have really grown to adore you here on YT and I want you to know just how sorry I am for what you are going through. I wish you all the luck in the world with making this choice. I know that it isn't easy.
I have to say that I agree with those who have said to get another pup. What about getting a little boy?? It might make what time your hubby has whether it be months or years happier. And it could be a great memory for you if something does take a turn for the worse. If you got a little boy it would kinda be a change since you have girls.

JMO.

Keep your chin up girl. We are all here for you.

[hockeymom]

Everything is easier to bare when you share the load. We will all help you carry the load anytime you need a little help, just let us know.

[rrosenberry]

Originally Posted by hockeymom

Everything is easier to bare when you share the load. We will all help you carry the load anytime you need a little help, just let us know.

I was thinking the same thing, but you said it perfectly!!

[Bella0722]

Red98vett,

First of all, let me say I am so sorry for what you're going thru. I have been there. You see, my late husband died at age of 43 due to Pancreatic Cancer. He wanted a Corvette, but didn't get it. I think on some level he realized he wouldn't be able to ride it much due to his fastly deteriorating condition. And I think he knew that that would be an extra burden on me after he died. I am glad he didn't because there are so many things going on that are added stressors to the grief you already feel. And he had great insurance which helped tremendously. But let me just say before addressing the Yorkie question, that I am here for you. Though I don't know you, let others help you during this difficult time. And please feel free to IM me. I'll be glad to help you. You won't realize the importance of friends and family when things are tough. Believe you me.

Regarding the question you posed about getting another Yorkie. It does not sound like this is the time to get one as much as you love them. I would agree with what Judy's2yorkies said earlier, needing to ask him what is causing the urge for him to want one now. This is really important. Has he always wanted another Yorkie, or now that he's sick? I would advise you to have an honest discussion and see why he would like a new puppy now. Does he want to have another puppy as a distraction for you when he passes? That was my first question, but I don't know your spouse. And my question that I'd like for you to ask yourself is, "Is the main reason that you would consider getting another Yorkie at this time because you feel sorry for him? If the answer is yes, then my suggestion to you is that you have a lot on your shoulders at this point and that now is not a good time for you. This is a time you have to make time to take care of yourself. I hope I am not speaking out of turn(I am a psychiatric social worker who retired last year and changed careers). You will need time to heal. Perhaps at a later date you will be ready for another bundle of joy. Take care, and please feel free to contact me.

~Bella, General Patton, & Maria~

[red98vett]

Tara...That was an awesome story about your grandmother....Fast Eddy - you are so right they bring smiles to us - I could take care of TEN yorkies.... but I worry about $$$ more at this point in time than I ever have before...

Maybe I'm thinking too much about the financial end of things - but it's really hard not to when the future can hold so much uncertainty...he lives more for the day and I'm the one who thinks 6 months ahead.

He's the kind of person that ALWAYS had to have 3 dogs ...it used to be cockers...He used to tell people that if something happened to one ...the other 2 had each other....He's infatuated with our yorkiegirls....I think he just loves the breed so much that's why he's wanting another. 3/4 of me is now leaning towards saying yes....especially after these ALL great posts - The people who posted saying it might not be a good idea is EXACTLY what I've been thinking - but then I read something like Tara's post about her grandmother and wonder...

It's just been a bad month and I get into such debates in my head - one day I think yes...then I talk myself out of it lol...

Who would think making a decision about a puppy would be this hard ?

I went thru this on a small scale with Cheri ...only it was only cause I loved having Chanel all to myself and didn't want to share her ! (a little selfish maybe ?) It was the best decision I could have made to get Cheri....

This really has been a great thread - I'm going to re-read all these posts again - and once more - thank you so much for your thoughts

[Chelsey]

Villette, this sounds horrilble I KNOW but isnt it so that we all live on borrowed time? we never really know what will happen tomorrow or the next day, i cant answer for u, but i know what i would do - life brings hope and i think that a new baby will be good for him, sounds like he really wants it and i know u have love for more, as u mentioned "money is an issue" theres always a solution to any problem and im sure deep in ur heart ur longing for a little baby to add to ur beautiful girls, they too will be proud to have a new baby brother or sister.

Please let us know what u decide

Good luck

[maggiepie]

If it were my husband, he would get whatever he wanted. I think things work themselves out. It must be meant to be that another baby comes into your life. I wouldn't question it. Just enjoy the puppy together.

[rnnw62]

So sorry for what you are going through...I am pretty close in age
to you and so this subject just sort of struck home in what would
I do if I was presented with such a situation? Personally if it were
me and I knew that this held that much importance to him I would
go ahead and grant his wish. If it made his life just a little happier
place then it would be well worth the sacrifice on my end. Plus if
and when the time comes I can think of no greater gift to be left
with than the pup he poured his last days of love into. I think the
memories would be priceless and the regrets would be few.

[red98vett]

Originally Posted by Chelsey

Villette, this sounds horrilble I KNOW but isnt it so that we all live on borrowed time? we never really know what will happen tomorrow or the next day, i cant answer for u, but i know what i would do - life brings hope and i think that a new baby will be good for him, sounds like he really wants it and i know u have love for more, as u mentioned "money is an issue" theres always a solution to any problem and im sure deep in ur heart ur longing for a little baby to add to ur beautiful girls, they too will be proud to have a new baby brother or sister.

Please let us know what u decide

Good luck

You know I will girl ! It took me a long time to grow up - and finally at 46... I think I did..... and now I wonder where on EARTH did I get this Reponsibility gene from all of a sudden? I never had it before...