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Old 08-08-2020, 10:14 AM   #1
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Default Does it get better? Loss of Callie

So I have to ask does it get better after the loss of a pup? I still break down over Callie and itís been almost 2 months. I took pictures of Penny, Joey and Ollie and I felt so guilty changing my Facebook cover picture, my picture here and my Facebook profile picture from pictures of her or with her. I just feel like for the 3 still here I have to try and push myself to move on. I have a lot of guilt like did I give up on her, did I pick the right time, did she think I gave up on her, and although I love all my babies there was a connection with her that I feel guilty I donít have with my others. I know my friends on Facebook are tired of hearing about it but I know yíall understand that she was not just a dog. I had her my whole adult life and itís so hard to go on without her. I think itís also worse because with things still being locked down and everything I donít have the ability to hide from it the same way by shopping or things like that. I had no idea that the hardest part would be missing her and her absence. Itís just so hard.
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Old 08-08-2020, 10:25 AM   #2
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I hope you remember me, I'm Harry's Mum from England. I hate to say this, but no - basically it doesn't get any better. Two months for you is a very, very short time.

We lost our Harry from cancer in January 2018 - he was only 7 years old. Andy and I cry for him every day, even after all this time...years on, he's still in our thoughts, hearts, dreams and wishes.

He's everywhere but nowhere and our heart are still bleeding xx
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Old 08-08-2020, 12:02 PM   #3
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I don’t know that it gets easier over time, but it does get ... different. The raw feelings fade; it gets easier to remember the good times without the sharp pangs of loss. You never forget, of course, and you wouldn’t want to forget. You do stop thinking about it every day, though.

I know it’s hard, but try not to torture yourself by second guessing your decision to end Callie’s suffering. She was uncomfortable. She couldn’t digest her food and was losing too much weight. She knew — in the strange way that animals seem to know — that her time was up. She didn’t think you gave up on her, she just knew that your arms and your love surrounded her while the pain left her body.
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Old 08-08-2020, 12:19 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluebells View Post
I don’t know that it gets easier over time, but it does get ... different. The raw feelings fade; it gets easier to remember the good times without the sharp pangs of loss. You never forget, of course, and you wouldn’t want to forget. You do stop thinking about it every day, though.

I know it’s hard, but try not to torture yourself by second guessing your decision to end Callie’s suffering. She was uncomfortable. She couldn’t digest her food and was losing too much weight. She knew — in the strange way that animals seem to know — that her time was up. She didn’t think you gave up on her, she just knew that your arms and your love surrounded her while the pain left her body.
We lost our Beau in the beginning of the year, and I do not think of him everyday, but do still have vivid dreams and wake up questioning the timing of our decision. Thank you for summing up all of the reasons that we knew it was time...but after the fact the loss sometimes brings guilt/regret. Beau left us calmly, and pain-free. We stayed with him, stroking and kissing him, and he was surrounded by love as he crossed the rainbow bridge. I am thankful that we are now at the point in our grief that we can miss him, but also look back and laugh at how silly he could be, and celebrate all of the wonderful times we had. I have not yet changed my profile pictures, and am not sure that I will. I love seeing my boys all cuddled together, and he is still with us in spirit.

There is no magic cure, or time table to grieving. Take your time Taylor, and do not worry what others may think.
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Last edited by nanajoy; 08-08-2020 at 12:20 PM.
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Old 08-08-2020, 03:25 PM   #5
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It gets better in the sense of less painful. A time will come that you can think back to the happier days you had with Callie and smile, not the last months of callie's life, but it takes time. October will be 8 years my Matese is gone but I can remember the good days of her life more then the last days of her life, It takes time but it will come for you. Now you have to be strong for your pack and that's hard, I have also been there (((hugs)))
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Old 08-08-2020, 05:42 PM   #6
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I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling. Callie was a special member of your family, and grieving her loss is inevitable, it is also a reminder of how special she was in your life. In time, you may feel a little less sad, and find comfort in the good memories you had with her. Although, you will always miss her, and will still cry sometimes, many years from now.

If Callie could talk to you from heaven, she'd be thanking you for all your love and giving her a wonderful life, and for letting her rest in peace when her body was worn out. Not letting her suffer longer was the greatest gift you could have given her.

It has been 6 years since my Meika passed (at only 5, being poisoned by a toad), and I am crying right now just thinking about her. I never took her out of my avatar picture here. But my other 3 pups adjusted, and bring me so much joy.
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Old 08-08-2020, 06:17 PM   #7
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I'm sorry and can feel your pain when you talk about lovely, Callie. I have a suggestion, I think you should put back your Avatar picture back on with Callie and all your other profile pictures elsewhere you had of her before as if nothing changed. It will keep good memories alive. Just like we humans, we cherish pictures of our past loved ones in picture albums and frames.

Although your new updated picture of the 3 dogs look great, but maybe having Callie in there will remind you of the good times and help you with less pain, since you probably started on this forum when you first got her right?

As Maui Girl and Nanajoy mentioned they left their past puppy dogs' picture in their Avatar, why not do the same? I'm sure nobody will ever question this. It's understandable. I hope it will make you feel better with her presence as you talk on Yorkie Talk. Callie will be smiling down lovingly at you too. Take care.
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Old 08-09-2020, 01:43 PM   #8
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Thank you everyone. Iím blessed to have yíall who understand.
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Old 08-10-2020, 05:16 AM   #9
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It always takes me awhile to give over a pet. The house always feels empty after the loss. I supposed that's why I keep my house filled with pets. For me, it eventually does get better and those memories that use to make me cry, now make me smile, just thankful for the time I had with them.
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Old 08-10-2020, 05:22 AM   #10
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I also went through the same guilt because she was in so much pain the last few weeks of her life even though she was on pain meds. My guilt came from thinking I didn't act soon enough. I always felt I should of let her go sooner
It bothered me so much that I drank a whole bottle of wine and asked her for forgiveness. It tore me up on the inside.

But I eventually let go of my guilt and now have another furbaby who has no doubt brought me new joy and also will bring me another heartbreak.
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Old 08-11-2020, 06:12 PM   #11
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I made doggy cupcakes for Pennyís birthday and I made 4 instead of 3. When I realized it I just broke down.
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Old 08-12-2020, 02:02 PM   #12
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Dear Love to Dreams,
I found this on a website I was reading but do not know how to send the link to you so I will re-write the message to you. I hope it will help you. I lost my Joey quite suddenly in June of 2018 so I understand as well what you are going through now. I still have bad days and I even still have talks with him at times. Here is what I read:
A Pet's Peace
I have left you now
But please don't be sad
You gave me all the love you had.
You did so much for me in my time here
And I'll always hold those precious times near
I know someday you'll find love again
And into your life will come a new friend
Your heart will heal,though you'll never forget
memories like the first time we met.
Memories are wonderful,so keep them close
and remember all the good times the most
I am at peace now so please don't be sad
You gave me all the love you had.


By Tracy M. Johnson


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Old 08-13-2020, 07:58 AM   #13
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Likewise, I found this on Facebook this morning:


“Hi Mom,
Now that I’ve been across The Rainbow Bridge for a couple weeks, they said I should write a letter home.
Sorry, Mom but I’m so busy ‘across the bridge’ that I haven’t thought of home much. They said it’s okay and that you would understand. I hope you do. (I think you will.)
Remember that night when I wasn’t feeling very well and we were all crying?
I don’t remember much, but I do remember seeing and hearing all of you and feeling your touches and hugs…I remember hearing “we love you” and that one last command of “Go through”.
I didn’t know what you meant, so I turned around and walked through the fog that was in front of me.
I saw the biggest bridge I’ve ever seen! And so many friends on the other side of it!
They were all playing with toys and balls!
You were right to tell me to go there!
My feet kept moving forward, but my heart kept pulling me back.
Your touches became lighter and lighter and I wanted to come back and nudge your hands for more love, but I was overcome by this feeling of curiosity for the happy place over the bridge!
My feet started moving on their own, like a gentle breeze was moving them forward for me!
I can’t explain it, but I had no doubt that it was the right thing to do!
So, I walked across that big, huge bridge by myself!
I looked for you, because you’re always by my side, walking with me, but this was different.
I didn’t have a collar around my neck or a leash connecting me to you ~ I was ‘free’!
Even though you weren’t there with me, I never felt alone!
I actually felt like I had a huge cape of love wrapped around my body and the more I walked, the easier it was to breathe!
So, I kept walking!
And I would feel more warmth in the big hug, so I kept on walking!
I eventually made it over the big bridge – I did it by myself, mom. When I got here, all of my new friends greeted me and helped me walk off the bridge ~ it was so cool!
They gave me a pair of wings and said that I was now a Guardian Angel!
What I’ve learned over these past few weeks has been amazing and nothing like I’ve seen before!
We’re all the same up here ~ we all have wings and we all have Forever People to watch over ~ that’s YOU, mom !
You’re my Forever Person and I’m your Forever Dog!
We had such a great life together and I do miss you a LOT, but please know that I am so happy in my new home across The Bridge!
I’ll send you another Earth Angel so you won’t be alone.
Give them your whole heart, like you gave it to me.
I’ll check in every so often to make sure they treasure your love ~ I always did!
When you miss me, think of a rainbow and know I’m on the other side of it, waiting to walk with you again.
I’ll always be in your heart.
I love you, mom!
Time for me to go play.”
-Author Unknown❤️����
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Old 08-13-2020, 08:36 AM   #14
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This bought tears to my eyes, but so up lifting.
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Old 08-13-2020, 04:05 PM   #15
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Quote:
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This bought tears to my eyes, but so up lifting.
My eyes were filled with tears when I copied and posted it too. It was on my feed because a dear friend just had to send her 15 year old rescue to the rainbow bridge and she referenced it. Any of us who have made that decision know how difficult it is...no matter how much we know it is our final act of love, it is SO HARD, and there usually follows times when we second guess our timing. I thought that this piece dealt so well with that, and made me smile when I thought of our sweet Beau playing and romping instead of being the poor, frail ghost his former self that he was when we last saw him!
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