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Old 08-10-2009, 12:58 PM   #16
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My heart aches for you... it truly does. I think you are 100% correct that those meds helped you suppress your emotions instead of dealing with them. I don't know what could help you realize that you are not at fault for what happened to your father. I think that might be a good first step take, learn to stop blaming yourself for the actions of someone else. I am sorry he did that, and I'm sorry he did that to you. I'm sure he would not want you to feel you are to blame. (((HUGS))) I'm sure there has to be help out there for you. Its a matter of finding it, which can be tough. There are state social workers, maybe you can find one in your area to talk to. I think releasing your thoughts here, on paper, anywhere, is always a GREAT release! Keep talking to whoever will listen. Prayers are going out to you!
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Old 08-10-2009, 02:06 PM   #17
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Since you are a nursing student - and if you are at a college or university, your college or university should have a mental health center where you can get help. I don't think they can refuse you - even though you don't have insurance.
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Old 08-10-2009, 02:17 PM   #18
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Life seem so unfair I know... Let me tell you that I understand a lot of your pain. Me, my sister, my best friend and another guy friend were coming back from a church cook-out when we were hit head on by a drunk driver who was on the wrong side of the road. As our car stopped in middle of the street, we were hit a second time on the side (the side I was on) by an escalade who didn't see us in time to stop. My best friend was killed instantly and both of my femur bones were snapped and came through the skin. It took over an hour to get all of us out of the car. My sister injured her back and wrist and our other friend had a shattered hip.
A couple of years later my baby sister (the same one that was in the car accident with us) was attacked and raped while she was alone in her apartment.
I have had quite a few severe panic/anxiety attacks in the last year because I have PTSD that I just can't seem to get over. I always stop and wonder what my life would have been life if I could go through life with that false sense of security that nothing bad will ever happen to me or my family. Instead, I have anxiety everytime I get in there car or I have to have someone walk me to my car if I go anywhere at night. I go through life being scared of what is going to happen next and I feel like those 2 guys took that sense of security away from me.
I have never lost a parent, so I can't say I completely understand what you have gone through but I get by with thinking about what I do have.
I just wanted to share my story with you and let you know I understand how difficult life can be when you've had bad things happen. If you ever need anyone to talk to, you can send me a PM anytime
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Old 08-10-2009, 05:23 PM   #19
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My daughter is just finishing up with pharmacy school and her rotations. She says that you need to go to your pharmacist and ask for the manufactures of the brand name drugs that you need. A lot of the time, manufacturers will give you vouchers for free or very cheap medications. Be sure to mention this to your pharmacist. Most pharmacists are willing to help those who are having difficulties getting the medications that they need. Another option is Wal-Mart's $4 generics program. My daughter believes that the generic of Zoloft is one of them. One more option is the Prescription Assistance Program: https://www.pparx.org This is another way to get a hold of manufacturers for free or cheap medications. It may be a more organized and beneficial way, but you may have to try both ways. These should help. If not, let me know and I will talk to my daughter about more options.
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Old 08-10-2009, 06:20 PM   #20
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Here is a site that lists links and contact info to many of the different drug manufacturers as well as other organization that help the uninsured with free or low cost prescription meds. Where to Find Free and Low Cost Prescription Drugs

If you check with some of the larger churches near you, you may find they have some counseling services that would help.

I also second the recommendation to visit your college's mental health center. Venting your feelings here is probably a good feeling, but venting in a therapeutic environment might help a lot more. Wish you well.
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Old 08-10-2009, 07:06 PM   #21
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If I could wish your problems away, I truly would. I'm sorry you are having a difficult time! I do think you need to seek some professional help and I also agree that the medication just sort of numb things but I'm not sure how much they actually get to the root of your problems. I have not been thru what you have been thru on the other hand, I have had difficulties in my life. My mom was sick with cancer for about 7 years before she passed away, leaving me at age 18 to raise my younger siblings. My father was an abusive alcoholic who actually beat my sick mother. Can you imagine? I could tell you stories but suffice it to say, I know that life is not always easy. But despite the things I've had to deal with, this is my life and I wouldn't trade it for anyone else's problems. Along with the pain and heartache, I have also been able to fine the joy in life and to recognize that without that pain, maybe I would not have found true happiness either. I think some of it comes from realizing that I always have choices to make. I can choose to take the easy way or I can choose to take the right path. I always try to choose the right path even when it's incredibly hard. I try to be the person my kids will be proud of, the kind of person my mother would have been proud of. Am I perfect, No! I pray daily and without God in my life, I think I'd be a terrible failure. I hope somehow you can find your way back and also find a way to forgive yourself. Sometimes that's the hardest thing in life to do. I will be praying for you.....
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Old 08-10-2009, 08:26 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ARCHIE View Post
I don't know what to say to you except I hope you get the help you
so desperately need. I am happy you were able to get your feelings out
in just typing them here on YT. I will keep you in my thoughts and
prayer's.
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Old 08-10-2009, 08:40 PM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 4doggiemama View Post
These should help. If not, let me know and I will talk to my daughter about more options.
Thank you, I will surely check the Walmart thing (I've completely forgotten about that. My mom was telling me about that)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FlDebra View Post
Here is a site that lists links and contact info to many of the different drug manufacturers as well as other organization that help the uninsured with free or low cost prescription meds. Where to Find Free and Low Cost Prescription Drugs

If you check with some of the larger churches near you, you may find they have some counseling services that would help.

I also second the recommendation to visit your college's mental health center. Venting your feelings here is probably a good feeling, but venting in a therapeutic environment might help a lot more. Wish you well.
I have used up my college mental health "credits" I was also deemed too ill to help and was sent else where, which made me feel like complete CRAP, to be told that. I never thought about the churches, but ever since I've been told "you are destroying God's tempt (my body) and that is such an awful sin" I've been too ashamed to "talk" to God about these problems in my life, let along go to other church members and be told the same thing. But then again I am in a different place right now. Maybe it is time I soul search in that area.
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Old 08-13-2009, 07:02 PM   #24
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Just wanted to say thank you to everyone. I guess I still have some serious issues I need to hammer out. I really just need to keep looking at all the good in my life (even thou I would NEVER EVER EVER kill myself or anything that serious). I did go to see my primary care physician (PCP) and she even feels that I still need to seeing a psychiatrist regularly (and was quite upset when I told her I stopped/have seen my psychrst in like 6 months. My PCP is awesome, and she sees right through my lying smiles/fake fasaad (spelling?).

Instead of getting my Zoloft refilled I will be going back to my therapist, before this whole eating/not eating/cutting NONSENSE, takes over again. Maybe this was a cry for help. I'm glad I did it thou. Although me being so hard on myself, I can't help but feel like this was a cry for attention, but maybe just maybe that's what I needed, someone to call my attention to how stupid and unhealthy these thoughts are ... regardless of how other "socially acceptable" things maybe or not be.

Thanks again. Going to fill my therapists pockets now!
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Old 08-13-2009, 07:36 PM   #25
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Glad to hear you are getting help. This is like any other medical problem, you have to find the right doc to help treat it. I did want to add though, don't ever be too ashamed to call on God for help. There is never shame in asking for guidance through prayer or a church official. If any of us were perfect we would not have needed salvation. It is impossible to live your life all by yourself. We all need help from time to time. When you do ask God for help, be ready to follow where He leads you. Don't be ashamed or afraid to trust in Him. Amazing things can happen for you!
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Old 08-15-2009, 07:02 PM   #26
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I am glad you are getting help, you are in my prayers.
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Old 08-17-2009, 04:10 PM   #27
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You can get Zoloft for under $25 at Walgreens and the generic name is SERTRALINE. My father passed away a year and a half ago and it took me more than a year to get over his death. There is also a forum called mixed nuts that you can join to get support. Mixed Nuts Links and here is another one. Depression Forums - A Depression & Mental Health Community Support Group
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Old 08-17-2009, 10:59 PM   #28
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Most drug companies have patient assistance programs for patients who can not afford their meds. I work in a mental health office and we have a supply of all the paperwork, the doc fills it out and the company will supply the medication for free if you qualify. Ask your pcp or the doctor that normally prescribes this medication if he/she will help you apply for assitance.

also you can google zoloft patient assistance and get more info too
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Old 08-17-2009, 11:51 PM   #29
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Hi, I do think that this thread might have been a roundabout way of asking for help, and I am glad you asked! Your family loves you, and your extended YT family loves you. We want to help.

I am glad to hear that you will be going back under the care of a psychiatrist / therapist. I don't think it's an either/or with the meds. Please keep taking the Zoloft until you discuss your treatment with a medical health care provider.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. We are here for you.
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Old 08-18-2009, 09:27 AM   #30
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I am so glad you were able to get back into therapy and know we are always here for you.
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