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[lisaly]

Originally Posted by Baby Blessing

It was five years November 5th that our Cassie left us, we were so blessed with many years with her. We know so well there isn't a time limit on getting over a loss of a beloved pet.

I am so sorry you had to go through all this. I hold Cassie's urn often, and still cry in missing her, I can't bare the thought of ever having to open it, reading your posting my heart felt the pain that you have gone through. Picture of Cassie is in our avator she is forever is in our hearts.

What a gift each and every precious fur baby is to us all, God knew they were needed in our lives.

Hugs to you from us both,
Patti and Jack

Originally Posted by Baby Blessing

Kathy this was so warmly put, with so much love from your heart.

I thank the Lord for guiding Jack and I in our search for another yorkie after loss of our Cassie. I truely believe God led us to our Baby Blessing, and HE didn't let it stop there so came to be Dollie and then our precious Prairie Bea.

I feel so Blessed to have them as they sure have helped me through much this past year, and have helped many times to put smiles on my face, and now Jack's once again.

Hugs, Patti and Jack

Dear Patti and Jack,
Thank you so much for sharing your story of Cassie with me. She was such a precious little girl and I can tell the love you still feel for her. I'm so sorry about the pain you feel. To me, it shows the intensity and depth of love you shared. I feel the same way about my little girls. I lost my mother when I was still in college over thirty years ago, and I still feel a love that burns so bright in my heart and guides me in everything I do. I don't think the pain is bad when it is because of a love so beautiful.

I'm so glad that you have more blessings in your life. It sounds like your babies have made you happy and have helped you during difficult times. I wish you love, health, and happiness for all of you in your family, including your daughter Jackie. My best friend for over 35 years, Diane, was deeply religious and very spiritual. While she was sick, she carried around a list of people she was praying for, especially when she went for her chemo treatments. I have a three year old voicemail saved on my cell phone from her where she talks about my becoming more of a prayer . I learned to pray much more because of my dear friend, and that's a great things. It's part of her legacy. I will pray for health and many more blessings for you and your family.

Love,
Lisa

[manolos mom]

You are one of my favorite YTers. You always have such kind words for everyone. I'm so sorry you have gone though this. When my first Scottie died we debated whether or not to cremate. We chose to bury him in our yard under his favorite tree. I would be very upset and in my opinion they owe you more than an apology.

[lisaly]

Originally Posted by manolos mom

You are one of my favorite YTers. You always have such kind words for everyone. I'm so sorry you have gone though this. When my first Scottie died we debated whether or not to cremate. We chose to bury him in our yard under his favorite tree. I would be very upset and in my opinion they owe you more than an apology.

It was so nice to come home and read what you wrote. It means a great deal to me, especially coming from you. I first found Yorkie Talk because Ashley was having some problems with her stomach. It was mostly because of gas pockets from taking in too much air into her belly. I spent most of my time reading the Sick/Emergency forums. I started to read about Lola, and I was so in awe of you. I still am. Your love and devotion to her truly inspired me, and it reminded me never to give up hope. I was so excited when she reached six pounds. I had never posted on a forum before, and I didn't really have the confidence to do so at the time. I was so touched by you, and I'm sorry that I didn't tell you that or offer my support then. Your have amazing mentors who are very wise to trust you with their precious pups. I'm so happy that you have entered the show world, and I will be cheering for you and Shiner. I'm very sorry about your Scottie. It sounds like that special tree was a wonderful choice. Jolie's tree will always be special to me. I've taken photos of it, but I will do as Kathy so beautifully suggested and take more of them.

[AMD]

I am so sorry for the loss of your baby in June. I am glad to hear you have your baby.
...RIP Sweetie.

[manolos mom]

Originally Posted by lisaly

It was so nice to come home and read what you wrote. It means a great deal to me, especially coming from you. I first found Yorkie Talk because Ashley was having some problems with her stomach. It was mostly because of gas pockets from taking in too much air into her belly. I spent most of my time reading the Sick/Emergency forums. I started to read about Lola, and I was so in awe of you. I still am. Your love and devotion to her truly inspired me, and it reminded me never to give up hope. I was so excited when she reached six pounds. I had never posted on a forum before, and I didn't really have the confidence to do so at the time. I was so touched by you, and I'm sorry that I didn't tell you that or offer my support then. Your have amazing mentors who are very wise to trust you with their precious pups. I'm so happy that you have entered the show world, and I will be cheering for you and Shiner. I'm very sorry about your Scottie. It sounds like that special tree was a wonderful choice. Jolie's tree will always be special to me. I've taken photos of it, but I will do as Kathy so beautifully suggested and take more of them.

I am so glad you posted this. I know it will make all of us aware of what could happen. I thank you for that. Bless you and your family and I love your Avatar. Yes, Lola is a special friend that has taught me so much. I feel they are put on this earth to teach us and to love us. Lola is in my Avatar, she is still a sick girl but we watch her closely. Thank you for all your kind words. Bless you and your family. Lissette

[zowiandnikasmom]

Originally Posted by lisaly

I appreciate how sweet everyone is, and I won't forget your kindness. With the loss of our other little babies, the pain is still deep and the love is very powerful. I wouldn't want it to be any other way. The difference is that time has healed some of the painful feelings, but it is a bit too soon with Ashley. We talk about all of our little girls often, and an overwhelming feeling of joy overtakes us as we remember how special they made our lives and how lucky we were to be their mom and dad. They were our babies and our lives revolved around caring for and loving them and helping them to feel secure and loved. The love we feel will last forever, even with the passage of time.

My husband still regrets the fact that we buried our first Yorkie, Jolie, in our backyard. We planted a beautiful tree for her with pretty flowers surrounding the area. I do love that area, but since we will move from here one day, it still upsets him that we will have to leave her behind. Knowing how he feels about this, I can't imagine how devastating it would have been if we were given the wrong ashes instead of Ashley's. I also would have been distraught if we had. I brought Ashley to our vet after she passed away in my arms at home, and I was given paperwork from them. Ashley's ashes had a copy of the paperwork contained with her ashes, so I am certain that we have her remains. I hope this post saves someone else the hurtful experience that we had. Thank you again for your support and for caring. It means the world to me.

so many of us here understand your great pain! it doesnt seem to get any easier no matter how much time has passed and we will never "get over" losing a family member. i know so many people do not understand. several of my coworkers gave me a hard time when we lost nika and told me she's just a dog. but they do not know the blessing it is to have them in our lives and how much our time with them means to us. they dont understand the deep love we feel for our babies. we are lucky to know how wonderful it is to have such a powerful feeling of love for them! no matter how great the pain is from losing them its all worth it to have that love and the memories and for our lives to be touched by them. im so thankful you're always there for everyone here with beautiful kind words and understanding. especially when in the world there are so many who do not understand and think we are nuts! i think of her all of the time and it still hurts so bad. the tears still come all the time. i would do anything to hold her again. as time passes i miss her more and more. im so glad i have zowi (nika's furmomma) and i cry and hold her in my arms and i know she knows why i am crying. she completely understands. she misses her baby too and understands my pain. shes so great at comforting me! i see nikas beautiful eyes every time i look into zowis eyes. they were just about identical except zowi was twice nikas size and nika had floppy ears, zowis stand straight up. thank you for the comfort you have given me and so many others, and thank you for always sharing it really does mean a lot. i am so lucky i got to be her mommy and ill never fill the whole in my heart from losing her. i wish we couldve been together forever she was so loving and caring. i also have a terrible feeling that the fluids she was supposed to be given in the emergency hospital were not dripping and that is why she passed. when i went to visit her that sunday morning before she passed away i saw the doctor there do a double take and seemed like she was fixing the iv to drip, like it had not been and seemed like she was trying to do it quickly before i looked back. i shouldve checked but just seeing how terrible nika looked broke my heart and i didnt think that something like that would happen especially when she was the only patient there at the time. we didn't think we were gonna lose her either. i guess ill never know. and they charged me less money than originally estimated so thats another reason i feel they didnt do everything they were supposed to be doing for her. it breaks my heart though and i will always wonder. i have found a different emergency vet to go to if its necessary. im glad that the ashes really turned out to be ashleys and im sure shes with you always in spirit and definately in your heart. you gave her 17 beautiful years of love and she knew how much she was loved! thanks again so much for being there! im glad to have people like you here! sending you a hug! ~ carrie

[zowiandnikasmom]

Originally Posted by lisaly

I appreciate how sweet everyone is, and I won't forget your kindness. With the loss of our other little babies, the pain is still deep and the love is very powerful. I wouldn't want it to be any other way. The difference is that time has healed some of the painful feelings, but it is a bit too soon with Ashley. We talk about all of our little girls often, and an overwhelming feeling of joy overtakes us as we remember how special they made our lives and how lucky we were to be their mom and dad. They were our babies and our lives revolved around caring for and loving them and helping them to feel secure and loved. The love we feel will last forever, even with the passage of time.

My husband still regrets the fact that we buried our first Yorkie, Jolie, in our backyard. We planted a beautiful tree for her with pretty flowers surrounding the area. I do love that area, but since we will move from here one day, it still upsets him that we will have to leave her behind. Knowing how he feels about this, I can't imagine how devastating it would have been if we were given the wrong ashes instead of Ashley's. I also would have been distraught if we had. I brought Ashley to our vet after she passed away in my arms at home, and I was given paperwork from them. Ashley's ashes had a copy of the paperwork contained with her ashes, so I am certain that we have her remains. I hope this post saves someone else the hurtful experience that we had. Thank you again for your support and for caring. It means the world to me.

so many of us here understand your great pain! it doesnt seem to get any easier no matter how much time has passed and we will never "get over" losing a family member. i know so many people do not understand. several of my coworkers gave me a hard time when we lost nika and told me she's just a dog. but they do not know the blessing it is to have them in our lives and how much our time with them means to us. they dont understand the deep love we feel for our babies. we are lucky to know how wonderful it is to have such a powerful feeling of love for them! no matter how great the pain is from losing them its all worth it to have that love and the memories and for our lives to be touched by them. im so thankful you're always there for everyone here with beautiful kind words and understanding. especially when in the world there are so many who do not understand and think we are nuts! i think of her all of the time and it still hurts so bad. the tears still come all the time. i would do anything to hold her again. as time passes i miss her more and more. im so glad i have zowi (nika's furmomma) and i cry and hold her in my arms and i know she knows why i am crying. she completely understands. she misses her baby too and understands my pain. shes so great at comforting me! i see nikas beautiful eyes every time i look into zowis eyes. they were just about identical except zowi was twice nikas size and nika had floppy ears, zowis stand straight up. thank you for the comfort you have given me and so many others, and thank you for always sharing it really does mean a lot. i am so lucky i got to be her mommy and ill never fill the whole in my heart from losing her. i wish we couldve been together forever she was so loving and caring. i also have a terrible feeling that the fluids she was supposed to be given in the emergency hospital were not dripping and that is why she passed. when i went to visit her that sunday morning before she passed away i saw the doctor there do a double take and seemed like she was fixing the iv to drip, like it had not been and seemed like she was trying to do it quickly before i looked back. i shouldve checked but just seeing how terrible nika looked broke my heart and i didnt think that something like that would happen especially when she was the only patient there at the time. we didn't think we were gonna lose her either. i guess ill never know. and they charged me less money than originally estimated so thats another reason i feel they didnt do everything they were supposed to be doing for her. it breaks my heart though and i will always wonder. i have found a different emergency vet to go to if its necessary. im glad that the ashes really turned out to be ashleys and im sure shes with you always in spirit and definately in your heart. you gave her 17 beautiful years of love and she knew how much she was loved! thanks again so much for being there! im glad to have people like you here! sending you a hug! ~ carrie

[lisaly]

Originally Posted by zowiandnikasmom

so many of us here understand your great pain! it doesnt seem to get any easier no matter how much time has passed and we will never "get over" losing a family member. i know so many people do not understand. several of my coworkers gave me a hard time when we lost nika and told me she's just a dog. but they do not know the blessing it is to have them in our lives and how much our time with them means to us. they dont understand the deep love we feel for our babies. we are lucky to know how wonderful it is to have such a powerful feeling of love for them! no matter how great the pain is from losing them its all worth it to have that love and the memories and for our lives to be touched by them. im so thankful you're always there for everyone here with beautiful kind words and understanding. especially when in the world there are so many who do not understand and think we are nuts! i think of her all of the time and it still hurts so bad. the tears still come all the time. i would do anything to hold her again. as time passes i miss her more and more. im so glad i have zowi (nika's furmomma) and i cry and hold her in my arms and i know she knows why i am crying. she completely understands. she misses her baby too and understands my pain. shes so great at comforting me! i see nikas beautiful eyes every time i look into zowis eyes. they were just about identical except zowi was twice nikas size and nika had floppy ears, zowis stand straight up. thank you for the comfort you have given me and so many others, and thank you for always sharing it really does mean a lot. i am so lucky i got to be her mommy and ill never fill the whole in my heart from losing her. i wish we couldve been together forever she was so loving and caring. i also have a terrible feeling that the fluids she was supposed to be given in the emergency hospital were not dripping and that is why she passed. when i went to visit her that sunday morning before she passed away i saw the doctor there do a double take and seemed like she was fixing the iv to drip, like it had not been and seemed like she was trying to do it quickly before i looked back. i shouldve checked but just seeing how terrible nika looked broke my heart and i didnt think that something like that would happen especially when she was the only patient there at the time. we didn't think we were gonna lose her either. i guess ill never know. and they charged me less money than originally estimated so thats another reason i feel they didnt do everything they were supposed to be doing for her. it breaks my heart though and i will always wonder. i have found a different emergency vet to go to if its necessary. im glad that the ashes really turned out to be ashleys and im sure shes with you always in spirit and definately in your heart. you gave her 17 beautiful years of love and she knew how much she was loved! thanks again so much for being there! im glad to have people like you here! sending you a hug! ~ carrie

Thank you so much, Carrie, for your beautiful post. It helps so much to have the love and support of others love their babies with all of their hearts and who truly understand the pain of losing a baby so loved. Your Nika sounds like she was such a special little girl. She will forever be a part of you. I understand what it is like to put your heart and soul into loving and caring for a little one. When you surrender yourself so completely to them and then lose them, your heart breaks. Our sweet little Kiwi had congestive heart failure, but I really thought she would be okay after we treated her for it. The medication that we put her on for her heart affected her kidneys, so I took her daily to the doctor for sub-q fluids to flush out her kidneys, to receive a vitamin shot, and for her doctor to examine her heart and lungs. Her doctor kindly only charged me for the fluids. He felt that she was better off being home with me than staying at the hospital for a few days if I was willing to take her there daily for a few weeks to flush out her kidneys (it was a 45 mile trip round-trip). When she started to eat again and to get better, I was so excited. We spent so much special, alone time those few weeks, especially with our long car rides to the doctor (my vet is wonderful and I would travel any distance to have him treat my little girls), and I told her how much I loved her. When we lost her from an eye infection that her body wasn’t strong enough to fight because of her other health issues, it was devastating. I know everything was done that we could have done to help Kiwi until she was stronger, but when you completely surrender your heart to these babies, it is so painful to lose them. It still haunts me that we may have missed something with Ashley. I took her to the doctor often, usually every two months and more if needed. Her doctor told us that it was unnecessary to have her checked out so often, but we wanted to make sure that we were doing everything possible for her and to be proactive in her care. Ashley acted like a puppy her whole life, but she just slowed down a bit and got tired more easily. Her doctor was amazed at how well she was doing a week before she died. Her heart and lungs were strong, and she was a happy little girl who was still walking a couple of miles most days, weather permitting. She was not feeling well a few days later, so I took her to see him. He thought it was a stomach bug, but he thought she'd be fine. I wish that I had made more of it when I described how Ashley was acting, because I knew in my heart that something was wrong. Ashley died two days later, one month short of her 17th birthday. I wouldn't have wanted my baby to go on living for my sake if it meant she would have had to suffer, but I hope I didn't fail her. There is nothing that my husband and I wouldn't have done for Ashley if she needed it, regardless of what it would have cost. Ashley was my love and heart. She still is, and so are her sisters. It haunts me that there was probably something with Ashley that we didn’t detect that I thought were her Canine Cognitive Disorder symptoms or problems caused by the gas pockets in her stomach. We had done blood tests not long before and she was doing so well, especially for her age. I understand the doubts you have about Nika at the emergency hospital. The doubts can drive you crazy, though. You did everything that you could do for your beloved little Nika, and she knew you loved her. It is so obvious the love you have for her still just by reading your posts. You gave her a great life. I know it’s different for me since Ashley was almost seventeen and lived such a full life, and I understand how difficult it is for you to lose Nika. I don’t think you can ever be ready to lose them, so instead you live each day cherishing the moments you have with them. I would just stare at Ashley just sleeping beside me, each time filled with such wonder and love. Every time she’d flail her paws to reach for me when my husband would hand her over to me to take her for a walk, I’d laugh. I can still envision each one of my girls in my head, with different aspects of their unique personalities. Although it won’t stop me from loving another one and surrendering my heart completely, I think it’s wonderful that the love of our beloved babies stays so strong in our hearts and minds. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope memories of your sweet Nika give you a reason to smile.

[BonBon]

Originally Posted by kjc

I'm sorry your are feeling the pain of having to leave little Jolie when the time comes...
May I suggest... take 4 pictures of her gravesite, one during each of the seasons, and put a bit of the dirt from the site in a baggie. Then, cut a few flowers when they bloom, and dry them, and snip a twig from the tree you planted in her memory. You could purchase an urn or one of those oak boxes from the vet and have it engraved with her name, and put these things in it, along with anything you may have kept, a favorite toy, a tooth, a lock of hair, a collar or charm. This at least would be something you can take with you.

I truly believe that a pup's spirit leaves the body immediately when the body ceases to function, and I believe their spirits stay with us and follow us wherever we go. They are always with us, it's just sad because we cannot see them any more. Not saying anything here, as I have my own collection of tiny boxes (and one large box). My intent was to bury the boxes, because this was there home while they were with me on this earth, but the ground here is not cooperating so I keep them in my bedroom.

And I am going to be brutally honest with you... your posts about your babies past totally undo me everytime I read one. I am sitting here once again trying to stay composed enough to convey my thoughts to you in the kindest and most gentle of ways... I am crying so much my own pups are getting worried about me... well here goes, and I am only going to say this once...

You and your Husband are such dear, sweet , good people, and you both have so much love for your precious babies, even now that they are gone. It upsets me to no end to hear the pain of your losses, the pain from having all this love and nowhere to put it. The constant ache in your hearts... it doesn't get better, and it won't. My heart breaks for you both. I know that you know your babies could sense when things were not 'right' with you. Do you think they would ever want you to feel like this on their passing? I don't know of any other way to say this, but you need, more than anyone I know or have ever known, you need to get another Yorkie to have in your lives. I know this may be hard to comprehend, but the cycle of love doesn't end... it only continues. And I am only speaking from experience, but the hurt cannot begin to heal until you can give that love you still hold so dear in your hearts to another Yorkie in need. The pain will not go away, because Love isn't made to be withheld, it is made to be given. The main excuse people give is they are not ready. Were any of us 'ready' to love a Yorkie? From all I have heard, no one ever expected to feel the intensity of the love that has grown in their hearts for their little ones. It is truly amazing. You both need to have this in your lives again, soon. If you are truly not ready... I will understand, but then please do it for me. Please get yourselves another little one to have in your lives. Know that my heart will bleed for you both until you do.

Love and Hugs Always,
Kathy

Lisa, I'm so sorry I'm just now seeing this thread. I'm in tears from reading your first post and the story of what happened with Ashley. Thank God you were able to be certain your baby was in fact home with you. And I'm in tears from reading Kathy's beautiful, thoughtful post I quoted above. I agree with every single word Kathy wrote.

You and your husband are amazing people, and I'm thrilled to hear you plan to bring another pup or two into your lives. I know these babies will be blessed to know your love and devotion, just as your three girls were so very lucky to have you.

Every post you write is heartfelt, geniune, thoughtful, caring....I could go on and on - I look forward to seeing what you post every time you write something. You've more than earned my respect and I'm proud to call you a friend.

Love and warm hugs to you,
Bonny

[lisaly]

Originally Posted by BonBon

Lisa, I'm so sorry I'm just now seeing this thread. I'm in tears from reading your first post and the story of what happened with Ashley. Thank God you were able to be certain your baby was in fact home with you. And I'm in tears from reading Kathy's beautiful, thoughtful post I quoted above. I agree with every single word Kathy wrote.

You and your husband are amazing people, and I'm thrilled to hear you plan to bring another pup or two into your lives. I know these babies will be blessed to know your love and devotion, just as your three girls were so very lucky to have you.

Every post you write is heartfelt, geniune, thoughtful, caring....I could go on and on - I look forward to seeing what you post every time you write something. You've more than earned my respect and I'm proud to call you a friend.

Love and warm hugs to you,
Bonny

Dear Bonny,

I 'm sorry that I didn't see this post when you wrote it, but it has warmed my heart greatly and makes such a huge difference in the way I am feeling. There are a number of people at Yorkie Talk that I truly look up to, and when they validate who I am as a Yorkie mom, it really helps with the fears I have of a finding a reputable breeder who will trust me to raise one of their precious babies. You are such a wonderful mom and such an advocate for our pups, so the fact that you believe in me, means a great deal to me. It's kind of how I felt when the parent of one of my students asked me if I would be legal guardian of her daughter if anything happened to her. She didn't know a lot about me other than the relationship that I had with her daughter, but she trusted me with what was most important to her in life. It was a huge honor for me, and I see your words about me as a suitable Yorkie mom as an equally important honor. Your love for your babies is so undeniable, overflowing, and everlasting. Your support of me uplifted me a great deal. Thank you so much for that. Bonny, you don't know too much about me, but I think you know that I am thinking of you and your babies, even though you haven't heard from me. I know you are busy and don't want to intrude in your life. Your babies are on my mind constantly. I hope they are well and that you are enjoying the moments you have with them. My heart and prayers are always with you.

Kathy's post really was beautiful, and I am so touched and humbled by what both of you have written. Once John has the surgery and is able to walk around and take care of a baby when I am at work, we would love to add another Yorkie to our lives. Thank you again for believing in us and for your beautiful words of support. Although I never thought I'd make friends when I came to Yorkie Talk, I am surely grateful that I have. Your friendship makes me very happy. Please give your babies some extra kisses today from me.

With love and kindest regards,
Lisa

[zowiandnikasmom]

Originally Posted by lisaly

Thank you so much, Carrie, for your beautiful post. It helps so much to have the love and support of others love their babies with all of their hearts and who truly understand the pain of losing a baby so loved. Your Nika sounds like she was such a special little girl. She will forever be a part of you. I understand what it is like to put your heart and soul into loving and caring for a little one. When you surrender yourself so completely to them and then lose them, your heart breaks. Our sweet little Kiwi had congestive heart failure, but I really thought she would be okay after we treated her for it. The medication that we put her on for her heart affected her kidneys, so I took her daily to the doctor for sub-q fluids to flush out her kidneys, to receive a vitamin shot, and for her doctor to examine her heart and lungs. Her doctor kindly only charged me for the fluids. He felt that she was better off being home with me than staying at the hospital for a few days if I was willing to take her there daily for a few weeks to flush out her kidneys (it was a 45 mile trip round-trip). When she started to eat again and to get better, I was so excited. We spent so much special, alone time those few weeks, especially with our long car rides to the doctor (my vet is wonderful and I would travel any distance to have him treat my little girls), and I told her how much I loved her. When we lost her from an eye infection that her body wasn’t strong enough to fight because of her other health issues, it was devastating. I know everything was done that we could have done to help Kiwi until she was stronger, but when you completely surrender your heart to these babies, it is so painful to lose them. It still haunts me that we may have missed something with Ashley. I took her to the doctor often, usually every two months and more if needed. Her doctor told us that it was unnecessary to have her checked out so often, but we wanted to make sure that we were doing everything possible for her and to be proactive in her care. Ashley acted like a puppy her whole life, but she just slowed down a bit and got tired more easily. Her doctor was amazed at how well she was doing a week before she died. Her heart and lungs were strong, and she was a happy little girl who was still walking a couple of miles most days, weather permitting. She was not feeling well a few days later, so I took her to see him. He thought it was a stomach bug, but he thought she'd be fine. I wish that I had made more of it when I described how Ashley was acting, because I knew in my heart that something was wrong. Ashley died two days later, one month short of her 17th birthday. I wouldn't have wanted my baby to go on living for my sake if it meant she would have had to suffer, but I hope I didn't fail her. There is nothing that my husband and I wouldn't have done for Ashley if she needed it, regardless of what it would have cost. Ashley was my love and heart. She still is, and so are her sisters. It haunts me that there was probably something with Ashley that we didn’t detect that I thought were her Canine Cognitive Disorder symptoms or problems caused by the gas pockets in her stomach. We had done blood tests not long before and she was doing so well, especially for her age. I understand the doubts you have about Nika at the emergency hospital. The doubts can drive you crazy, though. You did everything that you could do for your beloved little Nika, and she knew you loved her. It is so obvious the love you have for her still just by reading your posts. You gave her a great life. I know it’s different for me since Ashley was almost seventeen and lived such a full life, and I understand how difficult it is for you to lose Nika. I don’t think you can ever be ready to lose them, so instead you live each day cherishing the moments you have with them. I would just stare at Ashley just sleeping beside me, each time filled with such wonder and love. Every time she’d flail her paws to reach for me when my husband would hand her over to me to take her for a walk, I’d laugh. I can still envision each one of my girls in my head, with different aspects of their unique personalities. Although it won’t stop me from loving another one and surrendering my heart completely, I think it’s wonderful that the love of our beloved babies stays so strong in our hearts and minds. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I hope memories of your sweet Nika give you a reason to smile.

i havent been on here for a while, sorry for the delayed response. Nika was (and is) so special. they are all unique individuals and one of a kind but we had an extra closeness and her cute little ways always made me smile, laugh, and melt my heart. im sure you understand! i also travel a long distance (about an hour each direction) for a wonderful vet i completely trust. every time i go in there they can't believe how far i came but i always tell them she is worth the haul. just doesn't work in a dire situation unfortunately. ashley and your other beautiful little girls were very lucky to have such great parents! i'm sure you did not miss anything with her. there is no way you could have failed her, they all have thier time to go unfortunately. almost 17 years is alone a reason to know you took very good special care of her and love her incredibly! that is truely wonderful she had such a happy long life and her legend continues on within your heart and the hearts of everyone who has heard her story! i too would look at nika sleeping on my lap and think how lucky i am to have her and how precious she is and just cherish the time we had together. i could feel the huge amouts of love coming out of her 5 pound little body! she was always right by my side no matter what i was doing. i told her every day (like i do with zowi and my new little pixie) that she was so special to me and shes my best friend and how beautiful she is and how much i loved her! im glad that i did and i know i wouldve done anything to have her around no matter what, and i know she knew how much i love her! the memories do make me happy and smile but the tears still come a lot too. thanks again for being there! i hope your hubbys surgery goes well! we will always be close to our little angels in our hearts! i've had several memorial items made to remind me of the joy she brought me. we will never forget the happiness brought to us by those little angels!