Argument Over Couver...

[yorkie_mama22]

I am on the fence but I do agree with JMDT somewhat. Is your husband embarassed of taking the dog out or he just doesn't want him coming perhaps it draws too much attention. You should sit down and talk with him, maybe you guys can work something out. I know my fiancee gets upset sometimes when I bring Stormy out with us. He will nag before we leave. Some times I put up the fight and say I want to bring her if it's for a ride or a short trip. I ALWAYS bring her if I am going to a family members house. I bring her out about 85-95% of the time and thats because I am not working right now lol. I understand you want to take your pup out but believe me it's not worth fighting over. There is a reason he doesn't want you bringing him, tell him how you feel, maybe you guys can just compromise and agree on something you both like. After all I am sure you aren't going out shopping every day so sometimes it's nice to just go with your hubby and sometimes it's nice to bring your dog with you. The more you "fight" about the dog, your hubby may start to feel some resentment towards the dog and feel that the dog is getting inbetween you both.

[CouversMom]

Originally Posted by QuickSilver

Have you asked him why he doesn't want Couver to come with you?

He says he wants alone time... I understand, but it's still frustrating, because I want him to come... and he doesn't always get to come. I feel like to be responsible, I should take him everywhere he is allowed, because he spends all his time in the apartment.

[CouversMom]

Originally Posted by yorkie_mama22

I am on the fence but I do agree with JMDT somewhat. Is your husband embarassed of taking the dog out or he just doesn't want him coming perhaps it draws too much attention. You should sit down and talk with him, maybe you guys can work something out. I know my fiancee gets upset sometimes when I bring Stormy out with us. He will nag before we leave. Some times I put up the fight and say I want to bring her if it's for a ride or a short trip. I ALWAYS bring her if I am going to a family members house. I bring her out about 85-95% of the time and thats because I am not working right now lol. I understand you want to take your pup out but believe me it's not worth fighting over. There is a reason he doesn't want you bringing him, tell him how you feel, maybe you guys can just compromise and agree on something you both like. After all I am sure you aren't going out shopping every day so sometimes it's nice to just go with your hubby and sometimes it's nice to bring your dog with you. The more you "fight" about the dog, your hubby may start to feel some resentment towards the dog and feel that the dog is getting inbetween you both.

Yeah... Geesh. I don't know. I guess I should just let him have his way. I know it's not worth fighting over. He doesn't draw attention, I keep him in his carrier, so we don't get attention. I don't know... I think he's jealous of Couver I just love them both so much... it's hard to choose

[Yorkieville200]

Originally Posted by CouversMom

He says he wants alone time... I understand, but it's still frustrating, because I want him to come... and he doesn't always get to come. I feel like to be responsible, I should take him everywhere he is allowed, because he spends all his time in the apartment.

I can understand that your DH wants time alone with you. So, how about, one evening a week, the two of you go out on a "date" together? Not shopping, I mean a real "Date". Dress up, go to dinner, sit and talk.

Then, on the evenings you are just going shopping, bring Couver along, because you are right, in the respect that Couver is cooped up in the apartment all day.

Having Couver is good practice for the day you have children. (If children are in your plans) Because believe me, once you have children, everything changes.

Good Luck.

Marriage is hard work, and it requires a lot of compromise. In this case, you both need to compromise a little bit.

Sheila

[CouversMom]

Originally Posted by Yorkieville200

I can understand that your DH wants time alone with you. So, how about, one evening a week, the two of you go out on a "date" together? Not shopping, I mean a real "Date". Dress up, go to dinner, sit and talk.

Then, on the evenings you are just going shopping, bring Couver along, because you are right, in the respect that Couver is cooped up in the apartment all day.

Having Couver is good practice for the day you have children. (If children are in your plans) Because believe me, once you have children, everything changes.

Good Luck.

Marriage is hard work, and it requires a lot of compromise. In this case, you both need to compromise a little bit.

Sheila

I completely agree with you! That is a good idea... the date night! I think that would be fair. I do go places without Couver sometimes, but I am constantly thinking about him, so I figure why not bring him if I can

I will bring up the date night idea to the hubby.... thanks!!

[artie merlino]

Who did you have first your Husband or your Yorkie? IMO you should spend quality time w/your Hubby, he's probably just Jealous of all the attention your giving your Baby? Plus all the attention you get when your out in Public and
especially "Shopping"? I have 3 Yorkies now, but I had 2 when I met him. My male Artie refuses to acknowledge his existence and ignores him, unless I'm around. My 2nd one was a female puppy and only 6 mos. old, luckily he is also a "Dog Person" and had extensive experience Breeding & Training "Boxers"
and Pom Pom is their daughter, so we have had her since she was born.
We have been together for 4 yrs. now and to this day we still argue over how spoiled my Yorkies are......I have managed to keep both. I have also learned that they attract alot of attention and if your Hubby is not used to it,
it can be very nerve wrecking. All I can tell you is get used to it, I just finished an argument with mine.....that's why I am on this site. My Yorkies make me Happy, they are the only Family that I have that bring me Joy!
I understand how you feel, I'm sure he'll come around sooner or later.

[CouversMom]

Originally Posted by artie merlino

Who did you have first your Husband or your Yorkie? IMO you should spend quality time w/your Hubby, he's probably just Jealous of all the attention your giving your Baby? Plus all the attention you get when your out in Public and
especially "Shopping"? I have 3 Yorkies now, but I had 2 when I met him. My male Artie refuses to acknowledge his existence and ignores him, unless I'm around. My 2nd one was a female puppy and only 6 mos. old, luckily he is also a "Dog Person" and had extensive experience Breeding & Training "Boxers"
and Pom Pom is their daughter, so we have had her since she was born.
We have been together for 4 yrs. now and to this day we still argue over how spoiled my Yorkies are......I have managed to keep both. I have also learned that they attract alot of attention and if your Hubby is not used to it,
it can be very nerve wrecking. All I can tell you is get used to it, I just finished an argument with mine.....that's why I am on this site. My Yorkies make me Happy, they are the only Family that I have that bring me Joy!
I understand how you feel, I'm sure he'll come around sooner or later.

I had my hubby first I don't think it's the attention, because I really try to avoid any attention... as much as possible. He goes in his carrier, unless we are at the dog park or something. I just hope that he will be able to calm down after tonight and understand... I don't have any children, so Couver is my baby. I just want to be the best mom I can be, and the dh is getting in the way I will talk with him.

[Yorkieville200]

Originally Posted by CouversMom

I completely agree with you! That is a good idea... the date night! I think that would be fair. I do go places without Couver sometimes, but I am constantly thinking about him, so I figure why not bring him if I can

I will bring up the date night idea to the hubby.... thanks!!

You're welcome and I hope it resolves the problem.

I sat here, thinking about when our son was born 34 years ago, and a very wise lady gave me the very same advice.

The very wise lady was my mother, and she explained to me, that even though I was a mother, I was still a wife, and in order to be good parents, we had to remember that we were husband and wife.

You and your DH are parents to Couver, so in order to be good parents, you have to be a good husband and wife.

Hugs,
Sheila

[mizzwanned]

I think maybe he is jealous of the attention you give Couver. If my bf did that i would ask him why first of all and tell him to get over it lol Honestly i think its silly to be jealous over a pet(if that even is the reason). I guess you have to find out why first. Maybe he didnt want him or maybe Couver barks a lot outside? There has to be a reason...But my bf actually does the opposite, he tells me to bring them all lol I'm also your age btw

[QuickSilver]

The date night sounds good!

Is Couver more your dog than your husband's? I'm wondering why it's no longer "alone" time when Couver is there, since it's just a trip to BB&B. Maybe if your two men bond, it won't feel like a competition for your attention.

[CouversMom]

Originally Posted by QuickSilver

The date night sounds good!

Is Couver more your dog than your husband's? I'm wondering why it's no longer "alone" time when Couver is there, since it's just a trip to BB&B. Maybe if your two men bond, it won't feel like a competition for your attention.

Yes... Couver is "my" dog, but he has bonded with my hubby as well... I think that I just worry about him more...

[Nikitta34]

Originally Posted by CouversMom

I see everyone's points... I do believe that my hubby should come first, but I feel like he doesn't want Couver to ever come. (I am young- 22) so we are still working the kinks out, but I don't think it is that big of a deal to have Couver come along. We will have to have a discussion...

Oh, and I chose to take Couver and leave the hubby home tonight... I guess I will have to start making priorities. I just hate leaving him at home because I see how much he enjoys coming with!

Just be careful.... you don't want your hubby to start feeling bitter or like he needs to compete with Couver. I got married 1.5 years ago and there have definitely been some adjustments. That first year had more than it's fair share of arguments and frustrations. Make sure you communicate about why he doesn't want the dog to go along and be willing to make some compromises. Maybe if he'd rather the dog not go to stores, you can make plans to take a long walk together in the evenings, or spend an afternoon in a park or another dog-friendly area. Was your husband raised around animals? Do you have any other friends with dogs? Maybe a nice playdate is in order. Couver will probably have more fun running around with another dog than he does hanging out in your purse. (Please don't take offense -- I carry my dog, too!) Being married takes some adjustment on it's own, and you each need to have mutual respect for each other. Hopefully you will be able to sit down with him and talk about how each of you are feeling. Good luck!

[hugz4all4]

Originally Posted by jmdt

Sorry guys I still disagree. I've been married for 20 years. She seems to be young. ie. going to school and working full time. I think if this is a young marriage the husband has to come first. Maybe he should get the attention after all it's only an hour or two shopping trip. If she is working and going to school there certainly doesn't seem to be enough time together. The baby will still be there when she gets home to love. This is not a big thing to be arguing about. Pick your battles. I am an animal lover too don't get me wrong but my husband comes first. JMO

I agree 100 percent..

[hugz4all4]

Originally Posted by Yorkieville200

You're welcome and I hope it resolves the problem.

I sat here, thinking about when our son was born 34 years ago, and a very wise lady gave me the very same advice.

The very wise lady was my mother, and she explained to me, that even though I was a mother, I was still a wife, and in order to be good parents, we had to remember that we were husband and wife.

You and your DH are parents to Couver, so in order to be good parents, you have to be a good husband and wife.

Hugs,
Sheila

excellent advice

[viviansnickers]

Hey Girly....

I am also a newlywed (will be a year in August) and Snickers came into my life 2nd after my sweetheart husband. I am going to be upfront and count my blessings by saying that I think my husband loves Snickers more than me sometimes haha. He wouldn't mind taking Snickers everywhere, but you have to think about the NORM. So many people own dogs, small and large and the NORMAL thing to do is leave your dog at home when you run errands and when you go out to eat. It is not a question in our home, when we run errands and go out, Snick stays home. It's our time together and it's what society does and how things just are. Your husband might feel uncomfortable or weird that you're carrying your pup everywhere when generally people do not do that. He also has a good point that he wants time with you. We both also work and Snick is home alone from 9am-3:30pm and we don't like leaving him home when we have stuff to do, but we also have to have a life as well to meet up friends, socialize, and to run errands. Don't forget how important these 1st few years of marriage are for us...

Hugs!!

Ps..I have a carrier for Snick and want to take him everywhere but I fear of getting kicked out of places!!