Should the GE have a Cap on Spending?

[Lil Sis]

Originally Posted by jadabug

Sometimes the good old days are called that for a reason..I have participated in several past GE and all of them were after things went over the top. I might add from comments made during these many threads about change that I won't participate in any more. There is just too much drama and what is meant to be a fun and exciting thing has went way beyond being fun.
I had a blast in each GE I participated in and made life long friends in the process and it wasn't ever about the $$. I think the last sign ups when no one wanted to participate should be an eye opener to everyone.

I am a middle aged ge ... I was not a member in the good ole days I started a few years ago and it was when the spending started creaping up. I went in knowing I would spend way more then the min. and I did feel nervious when I saw the boxes and I was excited for my sb to get the box.

I never spent more then I could afford, I am crafty so many of my boxes were of items I made. Anything negative was my own doing.. kind of like the let down after Christmas. I will say it has been the past year that it has totaly gone down hill... so maybe "change" is causing the problem???

When ever you get this many people there will be differences of opinions. Some will be happy some will be nasty and complain..some in the middle. It is what it is. Feelings are being hurt ...for what??? really

I agree Lynzy..Michelle.. maybe go back to the basic. The GOOD OLE DAYS ..in many parts of our lives people are going back to the simple and good way of living.

I think Cathy had the best answer... admin will decided and imo a reasonable cap..$75.00 is great..

The challenge is what you can do for $50.00 to $75.00 dollars???????????

Also, I never really gave to the MOM's..except for simple items like note cards and such. imo it was for Remy! And I happen to like baby talk because it drove Lisa crazy lol

ok done

[Wylie's Mom]

Originally Posted by brezofleur

For you "old timers", (), regarding the old GEs... IMHO I think that's like reminiscing about the good ol' days. "Back then, we got to play in the lake...now it's a parking lot."

The thing is, things evolve. Whether it's for the better or not, you can't go back and recreate things when something set. We can make changes, but the GE will never go back to tons and tons of people only spending a few dollars.

Even with a cap, I don't think it'll go back to that. Things are too set now - the smilebox, babytalk, clues...and even then those won't last and something else will be introduced. I don't participate in those that I don't like, but they are there and not everyone is going to stop. It's just the evolution of things.

I think the reason why we have this poll is to help with future GEs. Reminiscing is just fine (human nature, after all ) but I think we shouldn't focus on what was and instead what can be.

I can't speak for all the "old timers", but I can tell you that for myself, this has less than zero to do with "reminiscing". If I wanted to reminisce about something, I'd probably either start a thread about it, or do it behind the scenes with someone who wants to as well. I don't think you meant your post in a negative way, but making generalizations about a group of people and their intentions was probably a little presumptuous. No offense taken though .

When things change in a huge way, and when it's not necessarily for the better - you look at the whole picture of how something evolved -- whether it's in business, at home, in a relationship, or on a forum. That's just the smart thing to do, it doesn't mean we're wasting time by waxing nostalgic.

Yes it has evolved. Which is why we're *looking* and evaluating the evolution of it. To evaluate the evolution, we have to look at its change over time...including the past.

I don't think anyone is trying to get it back to the way it was - I think most of us are trying to find ways to make it better balanced, more affordable, and without huge gradients of disparity. To me, those goals are a reasonable thing to brainstorm about....especially if/when it could result in the GE being more inclusive of more members. That'd be a win win in my book.

[JMuedog]

I stopped participating because of all the extra work with having hint threads and the drama... whether or not I receive a GE gift in which someone spent over the limit was irrelevant.

For me the $$$ spent doesn't matter if someone wants to spent over the limit that's their prerogative as we sign up knowing what the required amount of spending is.

[brezofleur]

First, let me start out by saying it was NOT condescending. I even said as much in the immediate post in case anyone took it the wrong way. The only point I was trying to get across is that I feel we are trying to revive the past and that can't happen. How many times in our own lives have we thought things were better in the past, we've tried to get it back, and then it just ends up being worse?

To me, it feels like a lot of people are saying that they don't want to join the GEs because of X or Y. And it also makes me feel that I, along with everyone else who has enjoyed the last 2-3 GEs (

Originally Posted by Lil Sis

I will say it has been the past year that it has totaly gone down hill...

)...that we have wasted our time doing it and that we are the problem. I think it goes further back than 1 year.

But now, after a couple of years of it, people have held it in for so long that they're finally bursting. I can't believe how passionate this has gotten. I wish that people had spoken up ages ago when it first bothered them instead of waiting.

There's been so much lack of communication on this forum, that passions boil.

So, lets sit back and decide what is not working.

1. The lack of a cap
2. Babytalk
3. Clues
4. Drama

Let's chat about some things that we can bring in the next GE and see how it works.

1. Even if it's not official, we could always do a trial cap and see how it goes. Of all the Secret Santas, etc that I've done, there has always been a range. I.e., $40-$50, $75-$100. No minimum and no cap.

2. Babytalk - I think too many members enjoy doing this and I don't feel like we can say that we should eliminiate this. But we can say if you don't like doing it, don't force yourself to do it. I don't. Others don't. So don't feel like you have to either.

3. Clues - Totally not necessary. Last GE not everyone gave them. Totally fine. I doubt I'll be giving many in the next GE because I suck at it, HA HA

4. Drama - I guess I've been lucky because there was zero drama in my first GE and only 1 thing in the last. And that turned out to NOT be an issue, in the end. Unless I missed something. But drama works 2+ ways so if we all keep this in mind and make it a drama-free zone, it could go smoothly, even with tons of people participating.

For those that participate in other forums, what rules do they have in place and that works for the vast majority of the group?

[Lil Sis]

Originally Posted by Lil Sis

I am a middle aged ge ... I was not a member in the good ole days I started a few years ago and it was when the spending started creaping up. I went in knowing I would spend way more then the min. and I did feel nervious when I saw the boxes and I was excited for my sb to get the box.

I never spent more then I could afford, I am crafty so many of my boxes were of items I made. Anything negative was my own doing.. kind of like the let down after Christmas. I will say it has been the past year that it has totaly gone down hill... so maybe "change" is causing the problem???

When ever you get this many people there will be differences of opinions. Some will be happy some will be nasty and complain..some in the middle. It is what it is. Feelings are being hurt ...for what??? really

I agree Lynzy..Michelle.. maybe go back to the basic. The GOOD OLE DAYS ..in many parts of our lives people are going back to the simple and good way of living.

I think Cathy had the best answer... admin will decided and imo a reasonable cap..$75.00 is great..

The challenge is what you can do for $50.00 to $75.00 dollars???????????

Also, I never really gave to the MOM's..except for simple items like note cards and such. imo it was for Remy! And I happen to like baby talk because it drove Lisa crazy lol

ok done

Just to be clear... I did not mean my statement toward anyone. Like I said, some will be happy some not. What I meant was the last few ge have not had many people entered..so down hill?

Also to be clear, I like the GE. I like babytalk, I like clues I like giving gifts and I truly like most people on yt. I love some. I am not good at drama because I tend to be more of a peacemaker. I hope that clears that up.

[lynzy420]

Originally Posted by Lil Sis

Just to be clear... I did not mean my statement toward anyone. Like I said, some will be happy some not. What I meant was the last few ge have not had many people entered..so down hill?

Also to be clear, I like the GE. I like babytalk, I like clues I like giving gifts and I truly like most people on yt. I love some. I am not good at drama because I tend to be more of a peacemaker. I hope that clears that up.

Oh Dear Shinja...the baby talk? pffft...NEVER!!! and I love you too...even if I was never your GE buddy! You are an absolute doll and thank you for not using the baby talk with me!!!

I absolutely hate that baby talk, it annoys me so much I can't even tell you...I have always skipped over those posts, I never talked to my kids like that. However; my kids speak English, Italian, Polish, French and Spanish and stupid at times! They could read and write in Kindergarten and both graduated High school 2 years early!!! One is a booksmart genius and the other is a intuitive genius...one is a lawyer and one is out saving the world...I digress; I despise baby talk!

[Lil Sis]

Originally Posted by lynzy420

Oh Dear Shinja...the baby talk? pffft...NEVER!!! and I love you too...even if I was never your GE buddy! You are an absolute doll and thank you for not using the baby talk with me!!!

I absolutely hate that baby talk, it annoys me so much I can't even tell you...I have always skipped over those posts, I never talked to my kids like that. However; my kids speak English, Italian, Polish, French and Spanish and stupid at times! They could read and write in Kindergarten and both graduated High school 2 years early!!! One is a booksmart genius and the other is a intuitive genius...one is a lawyer and one is out saving the world...I digress; I despise baby talk!

you are so funny!!! I have my degree in early childhood education, and Vocational Home economics. I agree with talking as an adult to children.

But... I really do have a hard time explaining to friends how grown women enter their pups in a gift exchange and post clues in baby talk. I have learned not to share that experience with others... (sorry... just had to use the FACE)

I just hope we can work the ge out. It was fun for me, yes I did not like the pressure at times but I blame myself for letting the pressure get to me. My problem was more the let down when it was over.. like Christmas.

[BabyGirl Rosie]

Originally Posted by Lil Sis

I am a middle aged ge ... I was not a member in the good ole days I started a few years ago and it was when the spending started creaping up. I went in knowing I would spend way more then the min. and I did feel nervious when I saw the boxes and I was excited for my sb to get the box.

I never spent more then I could afford, I am crafty so many of my boxes were of items I made. Anything negative was my own doing.. kind of like the let down after Christmas. I will say it has been the past year that it has totaly gone down hill... so maybe "change" is causing the problem???

When ever you get this many people there will be differences of opinions. Some will be happy some will be nasty and complain..some in the middle. It is what it is. Feelings are being hurt ...for what??? really

I agree Lynzy..Michelle.. maybe go back to the basic. The GOOD OLE DAYS ..in many parts of our lives people are going back to the simple and good way of living.

I think Cathy had the best answer... admin will decided and imo a reasonable cap..$75.00 is great..

The challenge is what you can do for $50.00 to $75.00 dollars???????????

Also, I never really gave to the MOM's..except for simple items like note cards and such. imo it was for Remy! And I happen to like baby talk because it drove Lisa crazy lol

ok done

Oh yes. Wugar, Wosie, and Wemy. BWAHAHAHAHA

[Jacksmom052709]

Originally Posted by McheleM

So, I'm playing devils advocate here... Lets say a cap is set and someone goes over it, what happens? Do they not get to do GE any more??
Who will "police" the spending? Will receipts be required?


The gift exchange is optional. No one has to sign up. if you dont want to spend the money, dont sign up. Those who don't have the money this time, often sit out. Those with multiple dogs rotate dogs. I do know that some people sign up and don't fulfill their end of the bargain, and that's wrong, but putting a cap on someone's GENEROSITY??? That's completely wrong.

I couldn't agree more - this is exactly how I feel 100%.

[Jacksmom052709]

Just wanted to state: I have since read other posts but still do not believe we need a cap.

[DBlain]

I tols mize mommie I wub the gibt xchange and she should nots be a spoily sport and go wif the flow so I coulds gets more toys
lub Lola

[MandiesMom]

Yeah, I only posted this on the other thread in GE section, Ann/Wylie's Mom had mentioned that perhaps there should be a discussion about putting in a cap. I thought that was a great idea so figured I would do a poll. I should've included more choices on there. Ugh. Sorry 'bout that.

I know Admin and the mods will make the decision on this. I just thought they wanted to have us discuss and contemplate the input of those on the forum. I didn't mean to step on anyone's toes if I did.

[lynzy420]

Originally Posted by DBlain

I tols mize mommie I wub the gibt xchange and she should nots be a spoily sport and go wif the flow so I coulds gets more toys
lub Lola

Oh no Donna tied her bow to tight again

[GeorgiesMomma]

Originally Posted by MandiesMom

Yeah, I only posted this on the other thread in GE section, Ann/Wylie's Mom had mentioned that perhaps there should be a discussion about putting in a cap. I thought that was a great idea so figured I would do a poll. I should've included more choices on there. Ugh. Sorry 'bout that.

I know Admin and the mods will make the decision on this. I just thought they wanted to have us discuss and contemplate the input of those on the forum. I didn't mean to step on anyone's toes if I did.

Terri please do not apologize. You are a wonderful person with good intentions and if people don't recognize that who cares about them anyways!!!!!!

[chattiesmom]

Originally Posted by MandiesMom

Yeah, I only posted this on the other thread in GE section, Ann/Wylie's Mom had mentioned that perhaps there should be a discussion about putting in a cap. I thought that was a great idea so figured I would do a poll. I should've included more choices on there. Ugh. Sorry 'bout that.

I know Admin and the mods will make the decision on this. I just thought they wanted to have us discuss and contemplate the input of those on the forum. I didn't mean to step on anyone's toes if I did.

Terri, don't apologize! This thread has encouraged some good input from a lot of members about Gift Exchanges. I can't see where you stepped on toes, you simply encouraged discussion.

You are absolutely right, Admins and Mods will make decisions and changes they feel will be in the best interests of YorkieTalk and the majority of it's members.