Venting.... - YorkieTalk.com Forums

spruitt7 · 10-15-2007, 11:02 AM

I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

yougetthesmiles · 10-15-2007, 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spruitt7

I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

enjoy your time now. after you have kids, you will see that most of your time and money are devoted to them.

I see nothing wrong with waiting till your 30 plus.

Tell your b/f to enjoy the time you 2 have alone now cause as soon as kids come into the picture, your quite time is over! lol

cariblonde · 10-15-2007, 11:32 AM

I think 30 is still very young!! You have plenty of time enjoy your youth, I'm 25 and feel like a dinosaur

Rockster's Mom · 10-15-2007, 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spruitt7

I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

Don't worry about what everyone else is doing. I was 31 when I got married and waiting until then was the best decision I every made. I really enjoyed my twenties and did not regret anything I did or did not do. Party up and worry about marriage and kids later. I still do not have any kids of my own yet, and that if just fine with me. You are just starting your life on your on, so don't rush things, just enjoy life as it is.

LuvnmyYorkie · 10-15-2007, 11:48 AM

I turn 22 in about a week and my roomates (AKA my 2 friends that are engaged and 8 months pregnant) are preparing for a baby, but yet still renting a room from me! And they're 24 and 28!! I'm so happy for them, but not jealous AT ALL!! I get to spend my money on things like Vegas (this weekend! YAY!) but they are buying soothing nipple gel packs for breast feeding...lol. We went to Target last night, and I bought stuff for me, while they were buying diaper wipes. Enjoy it now, and like someone said before, PARTY IT UP!! Plus, I swear I just turned 21 yesterday, it goes by way too fast!!

hartygirl · 10-15-2007, 11:49 AM

Dont stress, you are perfectly normal. I am 26 not married (bf for 5 years), no kiddos and just started my carreer. It is wonderful. I'm totally with you I don't think I will have kids until my mid to late 30's. I just want to travel and enjoy life, I worked hard to get where I am and I plan to reward myself a little before I have to share a checking account with someone and buy diapers!
I have a lot of friends that are young moms and they love it, and I get a little jellous because I'm afraid if I wait too long I wont get to be a MILF

but seriously, there is never a right time to do anything so do what you want!
Come on down to Corpus Christi, I'll buy you a drink.

Mybabyboymax · 10-15-2007, 11:53 AM

I think if you want to wait until 30 to have kids then you should! Do not let anyone tell you when you should be ready, only you know that

Now for my opinion LOL I feel that 30 is too old....but thats just me. I took the route where my kids will be 23, 16 and 15 by the time I'm 40. I didn't want to have a 10 year old at 40. my aunt is 45 with a 5 yr old and she loves it..you have to do what works for you

as far as the risks that are involved its mainly after the age of 40. I mean there are risk even at 20

wileycoyote · 10-16-2007, 12:17 PM

Take your time, everyone is different.

I married right out of high school, had my children a few years later, and still pursued college and a career. The only thing I probably would change is waiting a little longer before I started having the kids. I was almost 19 when married, almost 21 when first child born, 24 when second son born. I can definitely say I was more prepared and more mature when my second son was born.

On the otherhand, I had to have a complete hysterectomy at the age of 30 due to endometriosis and other health problems. So if I had waited til later in life for children, I may not have been able to have them.

You never know........ What is meant to be, will be.

jp4m2 · 10-16-2007, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spruitt7

I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

Thirty is defiantly not to late.....If it where me I'd wait....Once it's been done there's no going back, life as you know it will cease to exist

...

No more sleeping in with your man on a Sauturday morning....no more nice hair, make up or nails, you'll look like one of those women you see in the cereal aisle with their hair up in a pony tail,sweats on and a screaming toddler hanging on your leg wanting a box of CoCo Krispies...no more peeing in private...no more taking a bubble bath alone....no more clean clothes, yours will have a sucker stuck on your butt and a liquefied cookie smeared on your shirt...no more reading the paper or a book...no more friends, they'll disappear...no more having a drink to yourself, yours will have slobber swirling in it...No more just grabbing your keys and heading out the door on the spur of the moment... no more nice dinners out, yours will consist of ordered pizza....no more cute, sexy teddys, yours will be flannel.....no more life as you know it...

If the above sounds like heaven then go for it, if not I'd wait

AngelWorks · 10-16-2007, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spruitt7

I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

Stop stressing about what you "think" you are supposed to do and do what feels right for you.

No one else has to live your life but you.

No one.

Mybabyboymax · 10-16-2007, 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jp4m2

Thirty is defiantly not to late.....If it where me I'd wait....Once it's been done there's no going back, life as you know it will cease to exist

...

No more sleeping in with your man on a Sauturday morning....no more nice hair, make up or nails, you'll look like one of those women you see in the cereal aisle with their hair up in a pony tail,sweats on and a screaming toddler hanging on your leg wanting a box of CoCo Krispies...no more peeing in private...no more taking a bubble bath alone....no more clean clothes, yours will have a sucker stuck on your butt and a liquefied cookie smeared on your shirt...no more reading the paper or a book...no more friends, they'll disappear...no more having a drink to yourself, yours will have slobber swirling in it...No more just grabbing your keys and heading out the door on the spur of the moment... no more nice dinners out, yours will consist of ordered pizza....no more cute, sexy teddys, yours will be flannel.....no more life as you know it...

If the above sounds like heaven then go for it, if not I'd wait

This post made me laugh out loud! while maybe one or two things you say is true, most of it I disagree with. as a parent of 3 children ages 5,6 and 12 the only thing that applies to me would be going out on the spur of the moment, that has ended LOL but everything else is totally off...well in my case anyway.

jp4m2 · 10-16-2007, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mybabyboymax

This post made me laugh out loud! while maybe one or two things you say is true, most of it I disagree with. as a parent of 3 children ages 5,6 the only thing that applies to me would be going out on the spur of the moment, that has ended LOL but everything else is totally off...well in my case anyway.

That was a satire not meant to be taken literally

... Actually all the scenarios mentioned have happened to people I know

labrown · 10-16-2007, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mybabyboymax

I think if you want to wait until 30 to have kids then you should! Do not let anyone tell you when you should be ready, only you know that

Now for my opinion LOL I feel that 30 is too old....but thats just me. I took the route where my kids will be 23, 16 and 15 by the time I'm 40. I didn't want to have a 10 year old at 40. my aunt is 45 with a 5 yr old and she loves it..you have to do what works for you

as far as the risks that are involved its mainly after the age of 40. I mean there are risk even at 20

"Took the route"?? Does that mean you chose to have a kid at 17? Are you advocating having kids at 17? It doesn't seem like you planned it, since you didn't have another kid until you were 24...

Just curious, not trying to pick a fight. Mothers are the LAST people I want to piss off

And I totally agree, if you want to wait til you're 30, 35, whatever! No one can MAKE you gestate another human!

Mybabyboymax · 10-16-2007, 03:03 PM

children are a blessing not the plague LOL

Mybabyboymax · 10-16-2007, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by labrown

"Took the route"?? Does that mean you chose to have a kid at 17? Are you advocating having kids at 17? It doesn't seem like you planned it, since you didn't have another kid until you were 24...

Just curious, not trying to pick a fight. Mothers are the LAST people I want to piss off

And I totally agree, if you want to wait til you're 30, 35, whatever! No one can MAKE you gestate another human!

actually no I didnt intentionally have a child at the age of 17, not sure why that would even be assumed because it doesnt make to much sense to me. and yea Im screaming at the top of my lungs if your 17 have a baby!!!!! You say that you arent trying to pick a fight but I feel that the comments you made were meant to do exactly that...who knows maybe its just me but thats how I took it. In any case to answer your question no, I dont think at 17 girls should be having children (even though Im sure you knew the answer to that question way before you wrote it out)

10-15-2007, 11:02 AM	#1
spruitt7 Donating YT Addict Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Chicago Posts: 944	Venting.... I've been stressing so much. I just turned 21 in April. I've noticed that most people my age are already married. Some even have kids. Now I don't think theres anything wrong with getting married right out of high school, but its not for me. I've also noticed that alot of women start having kids around 24-28. Honestly, for me thats too early. Ughhh... so my problem is that I want to actually graduate from college and enjoy my career before I actually start having kids, but I'm not sure if its good or healthy to have children after 30. Plus, to make it even worse... My fiance/boyfriend wants me to have children around 26. Every time this subject comes up, it seems like hes just pressuring me. Gahhh... two years ago, I said "I'm NEVER having children" Lol.. Life is so confusing.

10-15-2007, 11:32 AM	#3
cariblonde Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: wilmington nc Posts: 1,585	I think 30 is still very young!! You have plenty of time enjoy your youth, I'm 25 and feel like a dinosaur __________________ Proud Member of the Spoiled Rotten Club and in the end, its not the years in your life that count but the life in your years.... Abraham Lincoln

10-15-2007, 11:48 AM	#5
LuvnmyYorkie Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Anaheim Posts: 588	Have fun while you can!! I turn 22 in about a week and my roomates (AKA my 2 friends that are engaged and 8 months pregnant) are preparing for a baby, but yet still renting a room from me! And they're 24 and 28!! I'm so happy for them, but not jealous AT ALL!! I get to spend my money on things like Vegas (this weekend! YAY!) but they are buying soothing nipple gel packs for breast feeding...lol. We went to Target last night, and I bought stuff for me, while they were buying diaper wipes. Enjoy it now, and like someone said before, PARTY IT UP!! Plus, I swear I just turned 21 yesterday, it goes by way too fast!! Last edited by LuvnmyYorkie; 10-15-2007 at 11:50 AM.

10-15-2007, 11:53 AM	#7
Mybabyboymax Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: NYC Posts: 1,859	I think if you want to wait until 30 to have kids then you should! Do not let anyone tell you when you should be ready, only you know that Now for my opinion LOL I feel that 30 is too old....but thats just me. I took the route where my kids will be 23, 16 and 15 by the time I'm 40. I didn't want to have a 10 year old at 40. my aunt is 45 with a 5 yr old and she loves it..you have to do what works for you as far as the risks that are involved its mainly after the age of 40. I mean there are risk even at 20 __________________ Its SummerTime!

10-16-2007, 12:17 PM	#8
wileycoyote Donating Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: May 2006 Location: West Virginia Posts: 366	Take your time, everyone is different. I married right out of high school, had my children a few years later, and still pursued college and a career. The only thing I probably would change is waiting a little longer before I started having the kids. I was almost 19 when married, almost 21 when first child born, 24 when second son born. I can definitely say I was more prepared and more mature when my second son was born. On the otherhand, I had to have a complete hysterectomy at the age of 30 due to endometriosis and other health problems. So if I had waited til later in life for children, I may not have been able to have them. You never know........ What is meant to be, will be. __________________ Ozzie and Selby's Mom

10-15-2007, 11:49 AM	#6
hartygirl megan - g Donating Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: South Texas Posts: 2,324	Dont stress, you are perfectly normal. I am 26 not married (bf for 5 years), no kiddos and just started my carreer. It is wonderful. I'm totally with you I don't think I will have kids until my mid to late 30's. I just want to travel and enjoy life, I worked hard to get where I am and I plan to reward myself a little before I have to share a checking account with someone and buy diapers! I have a lot of friends that are young moms and they love it, and I get a little jellous because I'm afraid if I wait too long I wont get to be a MILF but seriously, there is never a right time to do anything so do what you want! Come on down to Corpus Christi, I'll buy you a drink.

10-16-2007, 03:03 PM	#14
Mybabyboymax Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: NYC Posts: 1,859	children are a blessing not the plague LOL __________________ Its SummerTime!