I Am Devestated (warning pretty long)! - Page 5 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

mizzwanned · 08-29-2007, 12:13 PM

Please move on and if he keeps emailing you don't reply or just write back "I don't care, if we are done then we're done!" and that's it. Everyone here has given great advice, please forget about this loser and find a great guy that will treat you like you deserve. What about those other attorney's you went out with, the one that moves to seattle? He sounds nice

celstu1 · 08-29-2007, 12:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom

uggh it continues, why does he write me to let me know he is not going to contact me in the future, but of course will always love me and hopes I will "check in with him or say hi" in the future...Can't he just not contact me and see if I will do that?

I am trying really hard, but it is like he knows I feel so torn and he is trying to exacerbate it.

I do appreciate you all listening to me babble on and on about this. I do not think that there is anyone else that can handle it.

go to this other site
www.brokenheartedgirl.com - I am an admin there...

trust me... you will love it there too!

BabyFidgette · 08-29-2007, 02:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom

uggh it continues, why does he write me to let me know he is not going to contact me in the future, but of course will always love me and hopes I will "check in with him or say hi" in the future...Can't he just not contact me and see if I will do that?

I am trying really hard, but it is like he knows I feel so torn and he is trying to exacerbate it.

I do appreciate you all listening to me babble on and on about this. I do not think that there is anyone else that can handle it.

Honey, don't fall for his crap. You WILL get over this.

celstu1 · 08-29-2007, 04:01 PM

my ex texted me today after 2 months no contact and just over 2 years broken up!! they never go away and sadly the one they think is weak (in this case you & I ) is always the stronger one who has to hold our ground and not LET them do it again & again!!

I did not respond!

Bruce's_Mom · 08-30-2007, 09:11 AM

Well I saw the therapist. It did not really help with how I am feeling, but I think it will take time...I do not think anyone unless you have been there (which it sounds like many of you have) can understand how a relationship like this just wears you down over time...I did follow her directions however, I made notes to myself all over that I am not going to talk to this person, and reminding me to focus on my work and friends. I even noted his number as do not answer on all my phones, made his emails go to spam, and told my assistant not to put any call from him through at work...WE HAVE PROGRESS...

Thank you yorkie talkers for the support.

celstu1 · 08-30-2007, 09:52 AM

Thats wonderful.... Im glad you are making these changes to help you! Journaling helps immensely! Go visit my website www.brokenheartedgirl.com if you can! its strictly to help people through break ups!

do yourself another favor and delete his #s! You'll be glad you did!

doortego · 08-30-2007, 11:02 AM

Sounds like you are well on the way to recovery. I know it will be hard but you can do it.

jp4m2 · 08-30-2007, 11:39 AM

I'm so glad you seem to be on the right track now!....you know, you may feel anxious, guilty, hurt, disappointed, angry,let down, used,etc.etc right now, but those are some of the exact same feelings you where having while you where IN the relationship....at least if your going to go through those unpleasant feelings have them work toward a better outcome, a better ending, at least there IS an ending to the bad feelings once you work through them......if you stayed you would be experiencing those feeling FOREVER, with no ending...stay busy and stay strong and stay focused on the positive....

Buddy-licious · 08-30-2007, 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom

Well I saw the therapist. It did not really help with how I am feeling, but I think it will take time...I do not think anyone unless you have been there (which it sounds like many of you have) can understand how a relationship like this just wears you down over time...I did follow her directions however, I made notes to myself all over that I am not going to talk to this person, and reminding me to focus on my work and friends. I even noted his number as do not answer on all my phones, made his emails go to spam, and told my assistant not to put any call from him through at work...WE HAVE PROGRESS...

Thank you yorkie talkers for the support.

This is GREAT news!!!!!! These few steps are going to change your life!!!!! I am so proud of you!!!!!!
Yipeeeee!!!! Each day is going to get easier & easier!!! It is going to be no time and you are going to be looking back at all this and saying, "why did I wait so long to dump this guy"?

BabyFidgette · 08-31-2007, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom

Well I saw the therapist. It did not really help with how I am feeling, but I think it will take time...I do not think anyone unless you have been there (which it sounds like many of you have) can understand how a relationship like this just wears you down over time...I did follow her directions however, I made notes to myself all over that I am not going to talk to this person, and reminding me to focus on my work and friends. I even noted his number as do not answer on all my phones, made his emails go to spam, and told my assistant not to put any call from him through at work...WE HAVE PROGRESS...

Thank you yorkie talkers for the support.

Honey, it takes a lot of time. Stick with it! Hugs to you!!!! Oh, you know what else I did that helped? I talked into a little tape recorder.

Bruce's_Mom · 09-13-2007, 03:18 PM

Seriously, what is this guys problem? I ignore him completely and am doing pretty good at it, and according to him he is now dating some sort of super enhanced version of me so why can't he just disappear...We went 2 weeks and heard nothing from him! I was feeling better...Now he is sending really ridiculous e-cards, well just one but still...It had this awful music playing and said something to the effect of "Life goes on and so must we but you will always be special to me" and had a note saying how he loves me and hopes I am well and to say hello to my parents...If you hope I am well leave me alone screwball!!! What could possibly be someone's motivation to continually pour salt on someone else's wounds so to speak? UGGHHH just venting!

BabyFidgette · 09-13-2007, 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bruce's_Mom

Seriously, what is this guys problem? I ignore him completely and am doing pretty good at it, and according to him he is now dating some sort of super enhanced version of me so why can't he just disappear...We went 2 weeks and heard nothing from him! I was feeling better...Now he is sending really ridiculous e-cards, well just one but still...It had this awful music playing and said something to the effect of "Life goes on and so must we but you will always be special to me" and had a note saying how he loves me and hopes I am well and to say hello to my parents...If you hope I am well leave me alone screwball!!! What could possibly be someone's motivation to continually pour salt on someone else's wounds so to speak? UGGHHH just venting!

He's being an arsehole, that's what! You need to tell him that you want him to leave you alone.

deniserae · 09-23-2007, 05:26 AM

Hi,
I ran across your story by accident, but I can't help but respond. YOU ARE IN A TEXTBOOK ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP!! The cycle of "acting out"/ abusing you/ , appology, good period, then tension buildup resulting in another "act out". Classic abuser although he is not physical. PLEASE find the strength to get away from him. You sound like such an accomplished individual. You can do better.
Sincerely,
A Yorkie Talk pal

txshopper73 · 09-23-2007, 05:54 AM

I'll keep this short and simple.

1) This guys sounds like he has some mental problems of some sort...the highs and lows...sounds like a flipping roller coaster ride.

2) You need to make up your mind...do you like to be treated this way? If not, then stay away from him. He's no good for you!

JMO

08-29-2007, 12:13 PM	#61
mizzwanned Donating YT 11K Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: new york Posts: 14,007 Blog Entries: 2	Please move on and if he keeps emailing you don't reply or just write back "I don't care, if we are done then we're done!" and that's it. Everyone here has given great advice, please forget about this loser and find a great guy that will treat you like you deserve. What about those other attorney's you went out with, the one that moves to seattle? He sounds nice __________________ Primrose, Teddy..RIP, Livie..RIP, And can never forget my duo Sophie and London, Run in Peace <3

08-29-2007, 04:01 PM	#64
celstu1 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 10,534	my ex texted me today after 2 months no contact and just over 2 years broken up!! they never go away and sadly the one they think is weak (in this case you & I ) is always the stronger one who has to hold our ground and not LET them do it again & again!! I did not respond! __________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz Last edited by celstu1; 08-29-2007 at 04:04 PM.

08-30-2007, 09:11 AM	#65
Bruce's_Mom YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 779	Well I saw the therapist. It did not really help with how I am feeling, but I think it will take time...I do not think anyone unless you have been there (which it sounds like many of you have) can understand how a relationship like this just wears you down over time...I did follow her directions however, I made notes to myself all over that I am not going to talk to this person, and reminding me to focus on my work and friends. I even noted his number as do not answer on all my phones, made his emails go to spam, and told my assistant not to put any call from him through at work...WE HAVE PROGRESS... Thank you yorkie talkers for the support. __________________ Bruce's Dogster Page http://www.dogster.com/?177273

08-30-2007, 09:52 AM	#66
celstu1 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 10,534	Thats wonderful.... Im glad you are making these changes to help you! Journaling helps immensely! Go visit my website www.brokenheartedgirl.com if you can! its strictly to help people through break ups! do yourself another favor and delete his #s! You'll be glad you did! __________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz

08-30-2007, 11:02 AM	#67
doortego Little Bit & Buttons Donating Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: US Posts: 2,160	Congratulations Sounds like you are well on the way to recovery. I know it will be hard but you can do it.

08-30-2007, 11:39 AM	#68
jp4m2 Love my Boys Donating Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: w/ my boys Posts: 5,056	I'm so glad you seem to be on the right track now!....you know, you may feel anxious, guilty, hurt, disappointed, angry,let down, used,etc.etc right now, but those are some of the exact same feelings you where having while you where IN the relationship....at least if your going to go through those unpleasant feelings have them work toward a better outcome, a better ending, at least there IS an ending to the bad feelings once you work through them......if you stayed you would be experiencing those feeling FOREVER, with no ending...stay busy and stay strong and stay focused on the positive.... __________________ B.J.mom to : Jake J.J. Jack & Joey, momma misses you..... The joy found in the companionship of a pet is a blessing not given to everyone. The two most powerful words when we’re in struggle: me too..

09-13-2007, 03:18 PM	#71
Bruce's_Mom YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 779	Seriously, what is this guys problem? I ignore him completely and am doing pretty good at it, and according to him he is now dating some sort of super enhanced version of me so why can't he just disappear...We went 2 weeks and heard nothing from him! I was feeling better...Now he is sending really ridiculous e-cards, well just one but still...It had this awful music playing and said something to the effect of "Life goes on and so must we but you will always be special to me" and had a note saying how he loves me and hopes I am well and to say hello to my parents...If you hope I am well leave me alone screwball!!! What could possibly be someone's motivation to continually pour salt on someone else's wounds so to speak? UGGHHH just venting! __________________ Bruce's Dogster Page http://www.dogster.com/?177273

09-23-2007, 05:26 AM	#73
deniserae Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: alabama Posts: 25	Hi, I ran across your story by accident, but I can't help but respond. YOU ARE IN A TEXTBOOK ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP!! The cycle of "acting out"/ abusing you/ , appology, good period, then tension buildup resulting in another "act out". Classic abuser although he is not physical. PLEASE find the strength to get away from him. You sound like such an accomplished individual. You can do better. Sincerely, A Yorkie Talk pal

09-23-2007, 05:54 AM	#74
txshopper73 Donating YT 14K Club Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 14,226 Blog Entries: 1	I'll keep this short and simple. 1) This guys sounds like he has some mental problems of some sort...the highs and lows...sounds like a flipping roller coaster ride. 2) You need to make up your mind...do you like to be treated this way? If not, then stay away from him. He's no good for you! JMO __________________ As always...JMO (Just My Opinion) Kimberley