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Old 09-03-2008, 02:36 PM   #1
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Hi Everyone,
I don't post here often but I feel this is the only place to go where I can get advice as it is difficult to talk to my friends and family. Lately, I've been feeling literally empty inside...almost as if I have no soul and am just living to exist =/. I'm not sure if this is depression and I sure hope it's not. I'm 20 years old and really stressed about what I want to do with my life and I'm not sure if that's what could be causing it. I hardly go out anymore...I try to avoid hanging out with my main group of girlfriends since they are drama queens and I end up getting irritated too easily. My life consists of going to school and working...I've been with my boyfriend for a year and it seems like the only time I can forget about my problems is when I'm with him...but we are both busy people and only see each other a few times a week. We don't have problems and we get along really well so I don't think it's him that is causing my feeling like this. Has this ever happened to anyone? Please tell me this is just a phase that will pass.
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Old 09-03-2008, 02:58 PM   #2
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Sending a big hug. I think everyone can say they have been through a phase like that.. i know i have.. i felt like i was honestly living in a cloud... and just coudlnt see the light... It could be depression and if it is that's ok.. there is nothing wrong with that.. you just might need to see your doctor... and he/she can help it go away. Hang in there....
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Old 09-03-2008, 03:44 PM   #3
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I agree with what Marcella has said. Take one day at the time, count your blessings always help, and try somenthing different sometime like helping some one in need always bring a sense of fulfillment in our lives. God bless you and direct you in a very special way
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Old 09-03-2008, 04:35 PM   #4
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everyone goes through depression its going to sound silly but exercise is an easy cure for depression
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Old 09-03-2008, 04:55 PM   #5
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I'm one of those people who don't think we should ever ignore what are bodies and minds are trying to tell us. You could be dissatisfied with some aspect of your life, you might be working too hard and not doing enough of what fulfills you, and replenishes your spirit. It bothers me that the main time your feel good is with your boyfriend. I think it's great that this relationship is satisfying, but I'm concerned that you are not being satisfied in other areas of your life. Signs of depression include loss of appetite and difficulty in sleeping, generally there is a loss of enjoyment in every area. However, you don't seem to have reached that point, yet.

On the Oprah show yesterday, she interviewed the author of the book called Eat, Pray, Love. The book tells of one woman's journey of inter fulfillment. There were several women in the audience who had read the book and told of how it enriched their lives. I haven't read the book yet, but I got to say, it really made me excited, hearing some fairly simple ways to get in touch with your inner spirit. Woman tend to ignore this inner voice, we seem to take care of other's needs before our own, and if this helps you learn something at 20, you can set your life in a path you want from a very early age. Don't ignore you inner voice, listen to it, it loves you. Here's a link for more information: Eat, Pray, Love and Oprah's Book Club Announcement!

While it's true that many woman go through this periods, and many will tell you don't worry it will pass, sometimes if we don't take care of these things it shows up in a physical problem. I'm just asking you not to ignor these feelings.
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Old 09-03-2008, 05:06 PM   #6
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Thanks for everyone's replies! I'm definitely not ignoring it...just trying to make some sense of it at the moment and trying to figure out where the source of this feeling is. I have not lost my appetite and I still have a very regular sleeping pattern. I don't feel like I have a lot on my mind...I just sometimes feel like I don't have feelings at all if that makes sense. To clarify...I do feel good when I hang out with my close friends (not in a group though), not only my boyfriend... I do consider him one of my best friends though. I also find that thinking of the things I am blessed with in my life does help. Things could be worse...I am lucky it is not.
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Old 09-03-2008, 05:27 PM   #7
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Smart girl for reaching out....my advice would be to keep a daily journal and keep track of your moods. How long have you been feeling this way? Is it possible that it is a severe case of PMS, look up Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. I suffer with this and I know with me it got worse over time and now I HAVE to take antidepressants to get me through the worst of it. It doesn't get rid of it completely for me because I take a very small dose but it definitely takes the edge of. If it seems to be bad all the time and getting worse, definitely go see your doctor because it could be depression or anxiety disorder of some sort. Good luck I know how horrible you feel, it's no fun but there is help out there if you need it. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed because it's very common.
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Old 09-03-2008, 05:53 PM   #8
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I've been feeling like this for the past few months, but just recently I really noticed it and am growing concerned. I am beginning to wonder if it has anything to do with my birth control as I switched from a brand name to a generic a few months ago...I have never had mood problems with birth control but I hear that a lot of women do. It is really weird because my mood switches on and off...one moment I will feel perfectly content, and the next I feel empty again. I'm going to see if I can get my birth control changed and see if it makes a difference...last resort for me is going to the doctor...I really don't want to be put on any medications. I'm scared to become dependent on it =/
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Old 09-03-2008, 05:58 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jnguyen115 View Post
I've been feeling like this for the past few months, but just recently I really noticed it and am growing concerned. I am beginning to wonder if it has anything to do with my birth control as I switched from a brand name to a generic a few months ago...I have never had mood problems with birth control but I hear that a lot of women do. It is really weird because my mood switches on and off...one moment I will feel perfectly content, and the next I feel empty again. I'm going to see if I can get my birth control changed and see if it makes a difference...last resort for me is going to the doctor...I really don't want to be put on any medications. I'm scared to become dependent on it =/
Oh yes, birth control pills can play havoc with a woman's emotions. Those are some mighty important hormones you're taking and finding the right balance is extremely important.
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Old 09-03-2008, 07:05 PM   #10
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God Bless you sweet girl! I've been fighting a long cycle of panic attacks recently (which I've dealt with off and on since the age of 15) and it gets taxing on the spirit, so I've been fighting off depression with all that I am. I never really had depression before other than the "normal" times in life but now I can relate to what you are saying. When I would laugh it would feel as though it would only get as far as my chest...no belly laughs. I couldn't feel the joy anywhere else. I felt as though I was faking it because I couldn't find my happy place inside. I haven't touched my school work and I didn't balance my checkbook for almost 4 months...just avoiding many things I was always on top of. Went to the doctor and cried because I felt like a failure. She prescribed an anti-depressant and said my brain chemistry got messed up from the meds and anesthesia resulting from my foot and ankle reconstructive surgery months ago. I left her office with my samples in a brown bag and went directly to bible study. There I cried again and was anointed and prayed over...God is faithful! I have not taken the meds...I hate meds and the side effects they can cause, so I am determined to try and get through this with His help, the love and support of my family and friends, and if need be, the vitamin supplements my chiropractor so graciously gave to me, he also attends my church, to help boost my system and fight the depression/panic. The psychiatrist I visited told me to work out or walk 30 mins, three times a week to try to get my serotonin levels up myself. I have begun walking when I can and am starting to feel a difference. I am hoping to be myself again soon...almost there. I breathe and pray a lot, and am determined to have a positive attitude, which is hard but really helps the mind.

I wish you all the best and pray that you find your happy place again soon!

p.s. It took me over 8 hours to balance my checkbook when I finally sat down to write it all in! Good luck sweetie...we are all here for you!
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Old 09-03-2008, 10:25 PM   #11
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God Bless you sweet girl! I've been fighting a long cycle of panic attacks recently (which I've dealt with off and on since the age of 15) and it gets taxing on the spirit, so I've been fighting off depression with all that I am. I never really had depression before other than the "normal" times in life but now I can relate to what you are saying. When I would laugh it would feel as though it would only get as far as my chest...no belly laughs. I couldn't feel the joy anywhere else. I felt as though I was faking it because I couldn't find my happy place inside. I haven't touched my school work and I didn't balance my checkbook for almost 4 months...just avoiding many things I was always on top of. Went to the doctor and cried because I felt like a failure. She prescribed an anti-depressant and said my brain chemistry got messed up from the meds and anesthesia resulting from my foot and ankle reconstructive surgery months ago. I left her office with my samples in a brown bag and went directly to bible study. There I cried again and was anointed and prayed over...God is faithful! I have not taken the meds...I hate meds and the side effects they can cause, so I am determined to try and get through this with His help, the love and support of my family and friends, and if need be, the vitamin supplements my chiropractor so graciously gave to me, he also attends my church, to help boost my system and fight the depression/panic. The psychiatrist I visited told me to work out or walk 30 mins, three times a week to try to get my serotonin levels up myself. I have begun walking when I can and am starting to feel a difference. I am hoping to be myself again soon...almost there. I breathe and pray a lot, and am determined to have a positive attitude, which is hard but really helps the mind.

I wish you all the best and pray that you find your happy place again soon!

p.s. It took me over 8 hours to balance my checkbook when I finally sat down to write it all in! Good luck sweetie...we are all here for you!
Aw thank you so much... this all means a lot to me. I need to exercise too...I am constantly reminded and pressured by my family to lose weight (although I am only slightly overweight) and that contributes to my self consciousness...also one of the reasons I avoid going out as much now. Good luck to you velobabe. You are so strong, I can only hope I'll be just as strong as you!
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Old 09-04-2008, 07:16 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jnguyen115 View Post
...last resort for me is going to the doctor...I really don't want to be put on any medications. I'm scared to become dependent on it =/
I know it can be uncomfortable to admit that you are feeling depressed but I think you should talk about this with your doctor. Depression is a very common problem! As many others have suggested, there are a lot of non-medication remedies for depression that are worth trying but they are not successful for everyone.

I, too, suffered from depression a few years ago while my husband was in Iraq. I didn't want to admit that I was depressed until my doctor called me out on it. He prescribed me some medication and, like you, I didn't want to be dependent on it. I was freaked out and embarrassed about it and it took me a while to finally try the medication....it worked wonders!!! Within a few days I felt like myself again, like a huge weight had been lifted off of me and I can remember thinking, "Silly Dr., I don't need meds, I feel great!"...that is until I remembered I had been taking them for a few days. I took the medicine for a few months and then stopped. I didn't become dependent on it at all.

Anyways, I think it's worth discussing with your doctor so that he/she is aware of your feelings and so they can help you feel better soon!
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Old 09-04-2008, 10:10 AM   #13
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i know what you mean...i been feeling like that for the last year..hehe...i don't go out anymore...nor dress up or anything..is all work no play...hehe...hope things get better for you!
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Old 09-04-2008, 06:26 PM   #14
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Quote:
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I know it can be uncomfortable to admit that you are feeling depressed but I think you should talk about this with your doctor. Depression is a very common problem! As many others have suggested, there are a lot of non-medication remedies for depression that are worth trying but they are not successful for everyone.

I, too, suffered from depression a few years ago while my husband was in Iraq. I didn't want to admit that I was depressed until my doctor called me out on it. He prescribed me some medication and, like you, I didn't want to be dependent on it. I was freaked out and embarrassed about it and it took me a while to finally try the medication....it worked wonders!!! Within a few days I felt like myself again, like a huge weight had been lifted off of me and I can remember thinking, "Silly Dr., I don't need meds, I feel great!"...that is until I remembered I had been taking them for a few days. I took the medicine for a few months and then stopped. I didn't become dependent on it at all.

Anyways, I think it's worth discussing with your doctor so that he/she is aware of your feelings and so they can help you feel better soon!
Works wonders?? Hmm sounds like something I need...Who do I see to get meds for this? My general doctor? Or do I have to see a specific type of doctor..I have kaiser permanente so I am limited to their selections.
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Old 09-05-2008, 08:54 AM   #15
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I just talked to my regular doctor about it. I'll PM you with a bit more info.
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