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Old 04-06-2015, 04:02 PM   #1
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Default Asking for your prayers and thoughts! I am hurting so bad!

Asking for your prayers and thoughts! I am hurting so bad!

Back on March 1 I posted my first blog on this wonderful Godsent site about losing our first Yorkie on 2/21/15 unexpectedly of a bacterial infection at 10 1/2 years old. I was so distraught that i wondered how i would make through each day. I was a complete disaster. This site helped me to pass some of the time and just get my mind off of the pain for just a few minutes at a time.
However, this is the 7th week and I am still struggling really bad. I am still on medication for the anxiety and heart palpatations. I went to Easter service yesterday, hadn't been to church in a few months (non-denominational), and instead of "rejoicing" I found myself with tears streaming down asking God why he took my precious baby!
I know every single person with their personal loss is different, but should I still be in this much pain and anguish after nearly 7 weeks? I have a few wonderful and incredible people on this site who have emailed me back and I am so thankful for that! It has saved me from breaking down so many times. But I am asking you for your thoughts and prayers that I can find the strength to heal. I still have our 6 year old female to take care of, so getting another puppy is out of the question (she is not the personality for that and I wouldn't want them that many years apart like the last time). Thank you to all of you who read this! Just thinking about the caring people out there is heartwarming.
(Also, I am so new here, how do you completely start a brand new Blog?)
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Old 04-06-2015, 04:10 PM   #2
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I'm so glad you found us, and so sorry it was this way....I know how hard it is to lose a pup as I have had my share...time does give way to happy memories, in time....there is no proper way to grieve, or wrong way...just take the time you need and know that many many of us share your grief and understand it...we feel your pain....
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:00 PM   #3
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I'm so sorry you are hurting so badly. It's so heartbreaking to lose our little soulmate, our confidant and loyal best friend on this earth that it's hard to understand why illness, injury and life-span affect the one we care about more than almost anyone else. It never seems fair when we lose our beloved baby. Shock, grief and anger usually precede the beginnings of healing but if any of those periods are prolonged, keep talking about your baby and getting your feelings out, for starters. Keep a journal, post here, talk it out.

If you can rest, sleep, concentrate, work or interact well during any of this time, don't hesitate to reach our for some professional help just to get you past this point. Every one of us who've been around a while has been where you are - has lost our baby to disease, injury or age. Nature is nature and germs can sicken and sometimes kill, as do bad falls, liver disease, collapsing trachea, a car hitting a dog or another dog attack or even old age - many, many things go wrong with our babies as sadly, they all die of one thing or another but almost all of them die way, way too soon. Sickness, injury and death eventually catches up with every one of us on earth in one way or another. Learning some ways to cope with your great pain and loss will help you get through these next weeks and a grief support group or grief counselor can give you some coping tools to help you manage this horribly stressful time in your life so that you aren't hurting so badly. Coping tools aren't just gimmicks - they are ways people for centuries have managed to get through horrible ordeals and made it through and even helped others when they go through awful times in life. Maybe your doctor can prescribe some short term answers if you just reach out now - tell him or her you can't move past this pain and need help.

But most of us know exactly how you are feeling and how you hurt. Believe me, one day you gradually do begin to heal, life gets less painful and eventually, hope begins again in you. It really does and you just need some help getting there.
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:13 PM   #4
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My heart truly hurts for you and I want you to know I do understand. I also lost my 6 year old yorkie baby last September and the heartbreak was truly devastating. I was unprepared for how bad it would be. Each person grieves differently and nobody can tell you how to do it the "right" way. All I can say is that I also have felt your pain. I can tell you how I responded but it does not mean it will be right for you. I have transferred all that pain into a full-blown obsession with the Yorkshire terrier breed. I spend hours and hours every day researching the breed. I have joined my local kennel club. I have got a new puppy and started researching showing her. I have started going to every dog show and event that I can. I have kept myself so busy with yorkie activities. It doesn't take away the pain of my loss but gives me something productive to throw my heart into. I almost feel that it is a legacy to my girl. I am going to do something someday with all this newfound knowledge. Just not sure yet which direction my heart will take me in. Please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:20 PM   #5
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I am so very sorry for your loss and the pain you are in. I know it is not something you want to hear and I know it won't help right now, but honey TIME is the only thing that really helps. When I lost my baby at age 19 (she was a Persian cat) I was devastated , she was my first pet in my life , I had gotten her as a 40th bday gift and she was my everything.
I too had to take medication , I too asked God why, I was in so much emotional and physically pain I was sick. nothing but time helped me. Since then I have had 4 fur babies since then but she is never far in my thoughts.
know we are here for you and we care very much and want you to get well.
My prayers are with you.
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:22 PM   #6
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I know how you are feeling and it will get better but it takes time. When my first little girl died, my kids were in their teens. They had my pups around since they were toddlers and were also having a very difficult time. Some things that we did that seemed to help were to talk about our memories both the good and the difficult ones. We did this as we made memorial scrapbooks of our little girl. We also kept her collar with her tags and placed that in the book as well. Later, when we lost our second little girl, the kids automatically began the process of grieving by making another book for her as well. We look at the books when we are remembering them, even now when ai recently added a new puppy to my life. She will never replace my little girls but has her own place in our hearts. It is hard but it will get better. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:24 PM   #7
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Your post brought tears to my eyes. I remember so well the day my Charlie died. As others have said, we all experience grief in different ways. It is still painful thinking about him. However, I found this site when it happened. And over the past few years, people have posted things about their yorkies that bring back memories of Charlie. It's a beautiful gift to be able to remember his funny antics and to share them on here. If you want to, try sharing stories about your baby. At least for me, it seems almost like therapy to remember him in this forum with other people who love their babies as much as I love mine and who truly understand the grief of losing a pet.
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:28 PM   #8
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Hi, and again I am sorry. I did respond to you on your blog, and wrote so much that I can't think of any more I would add to that…..but, you are in my prayers and heart right now. I know you are in pain..Huge hugs
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:35 PM   #9
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If you can, will you tell us about your 10 1/2 year old Yorkie? What was her name, how did she come to live with you and what was she like, what did she like to do and what were her favorite things? What made her so very special to you? What do you feel you can share about your life together with us?

Or, if you prefer, tell us about the 6 year old girl you still have - share what you can about her little ways that make her unique to all other dogs?
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Old 04-06-2015, 05:56 PM   #10
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I lost my yorkie in February and I am finding that it gets easier as time goes on. I still have my moments but I am definitely smiling more. God bless you!
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Old 04-06-2015, 06:54 PM   #11
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So sorry for your loss....I can relate too...and yes it does take time but try and think what joy and differance she made to your life.and you wouldn't have that to be thankful to look back upon if she hadn't been brought into your life....
It was only for awhile they are with us , I wish I hadn't waited so long to get another and I dread that day someday too again I will have to go thru the heart ache ...but I try to keep in mind that it was i who made a differance in THEIR lives too...be glad you were there for her and had the good times you did together for a lifetime of memories....
God bless...
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Old 04-06-2015, 07:13 PM   #12
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I will pray for comfort to come to you. Losing a family pet is heartbreaking . My teddy peanut went to his creator at 10yrs. I view life as a gift and all we have we must give back to the Lord when He calls. I handed little Ted back and cried so much. I know it was Teds time to go home.
It took awhile to accept this and the comfort of friends helped. I still miss that sweet dog . He did his job and left a lot of love in my heart . Even through loss we are blessed to have known this love.
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Old 04-07-2015, 07:14 AM   #13
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Default How very sad

You grive how long it takes. I lost my first Yorkie @ one week after his 7th b- day. It's been 13 months and I still hurt badly. He had a terrible disease GME.
I still talk to his urn, kiss his pictures and cry myself to sleep. Can't hardly write this for tears now.
I'm now into my 2 week with my new Yorkie puppy. I only had one. Hopefully this will help. I love this guy with all my heat and he is quite a handful. I'm now so tired at bedtime I rest better.
Just devote all you engery, love, dictation to your little girl. She so terribly needs her mommy.
Prayers your way
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Old 04-07-2015, 03:46 PM   #14
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I am so new to the site, that I am not sure how to reply to each individual message of love, thoughts and prayers that all of you precious people have taken the time out of your busy lives,maybe your own grief to reply to me. I thank each and every one of you from my heart. Your words of support and/or your own stories have truly made me feel better, if only for I need. Thank you all so much! This site and the incredibly compassionate and truly caring people are incredible!
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Old 04-07-2015, 04:48 PM   #15
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Time will help, but take all the time you need. You will have good days and bad days. Grief comes in waves sometimes.
I will pray for you to feel the comfort of knowing your pup felt loved and treasured for all those years!
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