honest thoughts w/o the uglies.

[R-Teddy]

Originally Posted by Yorkiemom1

I am sure NONE of us want anyone to think their dog is crappy, for whatever reason. It is impossible to mandate or control how a person MUST feel about a post. It is impossible to guarantee that no one will ever read a post and feel absolutely positive about it. While it is so sad that some people come away "feeling" a certain way because of a post, please remember there are just as many MEMBERS who also have feelings, and their feelings are just as important as anyone elses, including any new OP.....there have been many long time members, very knowledgable people that have just given up and left this forum because they are constantly attacked about the way they post.....nothing that is outside the rules or regulations, but just because someone "feels" a poster may have gotten their feelings hurt.....the members that really had so much to give to this community, so much experience, so much knowledge, so much valuable information they could share with so many people, finally threw up their hands and walked away....just because someone did not like they way they answered questions. They were made to feel like their input was not appreciated or received well, because someone got their feelings hurt. Not that they insulted or humilated or attacked or belittled anyone, but just because someone FELT they did not like the way they answered questions....they "felt" they were spoken to unkindly. That is the real tragedy in this whole scenerio....sooooo many people will go unhelped, sooooo much expertise will be missed, simply because someone did not like the way they answered a question. You cant please all the people, all the time. While I sincerely do hope we never lose another new poster, I also REALLY pray we do not lose anymore of the respected, knowledgable, concerned people that can really help make this the most informative, most helpful forum covering dog care, available to anyone that wants to be a member.

I dont disagree with you. I know there can be new posters taht are real jerks. there have been many time I admit that I have read post from some new posters that make me just want to bash my head against a wall. So believe me, I do get the side of the older members as well, and how they would get frustrated.

I also really feel sorry for the admins and moderators who have to try to keep the peace. I do not envy their job.

People get passionate about things. Many posters here, especially the well knowledged people are indeed very passionate about the breed an everything that goes with it. However, passion can often become overbearing, especially to those who do not know you. There is a very FINE line between being passionate and trying to educate, and going a bit too far and becoming too overbearing and possibly insulting. Its difficult not to cross that line sometimes. the people who know you, are going to be far less apt to misunderstand your passion or what your saying. but to new people that do not know you, have never seen you post, it might not be so easy to know and you can indeed be misunderstood.

I work for a Pit bull rescue. believe me when I tell you I have run in to this A LOT. Pit bulls are one of the most misunderstood breeds there are and I am constantly having to defend them and myself for trying to save them. It is hard.

[MarkFromSea]

Originally Posted by Lovetodream88

You seem to have to out for a certain member who was just trying to help you and if she broke the rules she would have actions taken against her!

Oh, who could that be? LOL It's been said multiple times, that someone chased me away, even by a moderator in a PM. I just don't post much any more.

Mother Theresa receives preferential treatment when it comes to deletions what makes you feel actions would be taken against a saint like that?

When this thread was first posted, between the title and first post, I had just skipped it. It was difficult to decipher the question. Now, with 80+ posts, I read a bit more. Some became focused on the title and ignored the question. Why bother unless ya just want to show the ugly. LOL Seems the question was valid once it was clarified and yet some still focused on the title. Why open the thread if the title offended you? Seems if "some" others would have skipped the thread, it would have answered the OPs question and remained peaceful as it should have.

[R-Teddy]

Originally Posted by MarkFromSea

Oh, who could that be? LOL It's been said multiple times, that someone chased me away, even by a moderator in a PM. I just don't post much any more.

Mother Theresa receives preferential treatment when it comes to deletions what makes you feel actions would be taken against a saint like that?

When this thread was first posted, between the title and first post, I had just skipped it. It was difficult to decipher the question. Now, with 80+ posts, I read a bit more. Some became focused on the title and ignored the question. Why bother unless ya just want to show the ugly. LOL Seems the question was valid once it was clarified and yet some still focused on the title. Why open the thread if the title offended you? Seems if "some" others would have skipped the thread, it would have answered the OPs question and remained peaceful as it should have.

I have to admit I found some post to be condescending. Now im not saying im a saint an haven't made mistake. I could have handled things better yes. But, for example, one poster ( dont remember their name ) that sticks out to me is when she said, she had learned to weed out the post she doesnt like, and to get over them. ok great, then why didnt she just weed out my post she didnt like and get over those? Is not that just as bad as she was accusing me of doing?

[R-Teddy]

But you know what. im starting the fuss over again and I dont want to do that. so I think its really jsut best to let this thread END

[MarkFromSea]

LOL another simple post of mine deleted....... wow...

[MarkFromSea]

Originally Posted by R-Teddy

I have to admit I found some post to be condescending. Now im not saying im a saint an haven't made mistake. I could have handled things better yes. But, for example, one poster ( dont remember their name ) that sticks out to me is when she said, she had learned to weed out the post she doesnt like, and to get over them. ok great, then why didnt she just weed out my post she didnt like and get over those? Is not that just as bad as she was accusing me of doing?

I agree... originally, I just skipped this entire thread. If I can do it, anybody should be able to. LOL Once the question was clarified, seemed fine.

Here's an idea>>>> Make it so an OP has control of their thread, make it so an OP can delete any response to their thread and the ultimate choice of deleting the entire thread. I'm in a couple other forums that allow that... It seems to work somewhat. It doesn't stop negative postings so much, but they do go away quick enough.

[Lovetodream88]

Originally Posted by MarkFromSea

Oh, who could that be? LOL It's been said multiple times, that someone chased me away, even by a moderator in a PM. I just don't post much any more.

Mother Theresa receives preferential treatment when it comes to deletions what makes you feel actions would be taken against a saint like that?

When this thread was first posted, between the title and first post, I had just skipped it. It was difficult to decipher the question. Now, with 80+ posts, I read a bit more. Some became focused on the title and ignored the question. Why bother unless ya just want to show the ugly. LOL Seems the question was valid once it was clarified and yet some still focused on the title. Why open the thread if the title offended you? Seems if "some" others would have skipped the thread, it would have answered the OPs question and remained peaceful as it should have.

How come you can't just let it go?

[Lovetodream88]

Originally Posted by MarkFromSea

I agree... originally, I just skipped this entire thread. If I can do it, anybody should be able to. LOL Once the question was clarified, seemed fine.

Here's an idea>>>> Make it so an OP has control of their thread, make it so an OP can delete any response to their thread and the ultimate choice of deleting the entire thread. I'm in a couple other forums that allow that... It seems to work somewhat. It doesn't stop negative postings so much, but they do go away quick enough.

That's not going to help anyone learn because sometimes the truth is not rainbows and sunshine sometimes the truth just stinks.

[Lovetodream88]

Originally Posted by MarkFromSea

LOL another simple post of mine deleted....... wow...

Because you continue to bash a member and yt you need to just let it go.

[chachi]

Originally Posted by Lovetodream88

Because you continue to bash a member and yt you need to just let it go.

Who is mother Theresa

[shelbysmom]

I think this thread became messy for a few reasons. The OP is already frustrated because she has been through heated questions about her byb decision. I imagine she titled the thread because she didn't want a repeat smackdown. It was a good title, got those that are passionate interested. Some of the first feedback remarks were from someone that may not have seen or been part of the other thread so lots of the same criticism innocently came up. The most passionate "offenders" are those that have been through this and it's a personal issue.


When someone goes looking for a pup there are better and best ways to strive for a dog that looks and acts like a Yorkie and is as healthy as a good breeder can plan. Even doing that does not guarantee you won't have issues but at least you will know you tried AND you are not supporting someone who is either abusive (puppy mills) or ignorant (byb).

We need to help people who are searching for advice and support people who are struggling with a poor decision.

[Yorkiemom1]

Originally Posted by MarkFromSea

I agree... originally, I just skipped this entire thread. If I can do it, anybody should be able to. LOL Once the question was clarified, seemed fine.

Here's an idea>>>> Make it so an OP has control of their thread, make it so an OP can delete any response to their thread and the ultimate choice of deleting the entire thread. I'm in a couple other forums that allow that... It seems to work somewhat. It doesn't stop negative postings so much, but they do go away quick enough.

I do not think deleting another posters response is "kind" or "tolerant"....what about THEIR feelings being hurt because someone does not like their sentence structure or their speech pattern and then just negates and invalidates their opinion or information or attempt at helping....when people take their time to respond to a post, as long as the post is within the acceptable parameters of the forum, SOMEONE can and will learn from the thread.....remember, the problem is NOT absolutely necessarily the response or the information contained in the response, it is the WAY the post is felt to be received by some. Apparently, what some see no harm-no foul with, what some see as informative and teaching, others may see as "ugly".... Does not seem appropriate to deny all those people that DO learn and get past a response, as well as all the people that just read this forum and dont actively participate. Seems much more appropriate to have the offended poster REPORT the post they find offensive, and then move over the offensive post. Some people are not able to hear the truth about a situation. As someone said, the truth is often not always "rainbows and sunshine, sometimes it just stinks". Others learn from that very same post and find no offense with it at all.

[chachi]

I dont want the op to be able to delete threads. We dont need censorship the forum isnt about the OP of one thread but the group of people that make the forum and even the ones that just read posts. We just need to use common sense when we post and we need to use common sense when we start a thread or reply to a thread that there may be someone who disagrees with us and posts and that is okay its a forum for all opinions. I really didnt like when someone called someone Mother Theresa though I see where they may have felt compelled to do it but when it comes down to it it is character assasination and I really dont think someone needs to stoop to that level to get their point accross. I hope we can learn from each other whats appropriate to post, what pushes buttons and causes drama, and we dont go on repeating what is making divides on here and is unproductive

[MaWilliams3]

Originally Posted by shelbysmom

I think this thread became messy for a few reasons. The OP is already frustrated because she has been through heated questions about her byb decision. I imagine she titled the thread because she didn't want a repeat smackdown. It was a good title, got those that are passionate interested. Some of the first feedback remarks were from someone that may not have seen or been part of the other thread so lots of the same criticism innocently came up. The most passionate "offenders" are those that have been through this and it's a personal issue.


When someone goes looking for a pup there are better and best ways to strive for a dog that looks and acts like a Yorkie and is as healthy as a good breeder can plan. Even doing that does not guarantee you won't have issues but at least you will know you tried AND you are not supporting someone who is either abusive (puppy mills) or ignorant (byb).

We need to help people who are searching for advice and support people who are struggling with a poor decision.

Exactly. And in the future, I will think more thoroughly, on posts, and revert to not replying when someone offends me.

[Buster Brown]

[QUOTE=MarkFromSea;4486989]

Mother Theresa receives preferential treatment when it comes to deletions


Perhaps because of this
http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/sic...cked-sick.html

http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/sic...s-graphic.html

She walks her talk. Yorkie Haven Rescue