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Zeus' Mom · 12-05-2005, 06:36 AM

Robbie, I am so very sorry for the loss that you and your family have experienced. My heart goes out to you, as I can only imagine what it has been like for you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

kara · 12-05-2005, 06:36 AM

I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I know of the feelings of guilt that you spoke of-wishing you knew or that you should have done something else. I have those feelings and I carry them with me everyday since I lost my cocker Alex in 2004. I have not yet been able to forgive myself and move on. I wish for you the strength to get through this. I am very sorry for your loss.

txshopper73 · 12-05-2005, 06:47 AM

Oh, Robbie! How awful! I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through. You will be kept in my thoughts.

Yorkie · 12-05-2005, 07:11 AM

Robbie, I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling. I could truely feel how hurt you by by your words in your posts and I will keep you, the pups and your family in my prayers.

simonandhallie · 12-05-2005, 07:17 AM

Robbie, I am so sorry for you! Words escape me, your post was riveting and beautiful! I can feel your pain and I will pray for you and your family! Kimberly~

Bentley&BitsysMom · 12-05-2005, 07:25 AM

Hi Robbie, I read your post last night but was too saddened to even reply. I am SO very sorry about what happened....I do think it's one of the saddest tradgedies I've ever read on here. I have prayed for you and hope that you find peace and comfort in your heart knowing that you have friends here who love you and share your pain and loss.

baili's mom · 12-05-2005, 07:29 AM

Robbie,
I am so glad you posted. There are so many people here who care about you
and are here to listen and be supportive! I told you before I can't imagine
the heartbreak you are going thru! But please dont blame yourself. I hope
the words from Pat and Irene are comforting to you coming from experts.
You have my number and I am here if you want to talk! You are in
my prayers sweetie!
judi

centralnewyorki · 12-05-2005, 07:45 AM

Robbie, I am so sorry to hear about Rio. Thank goodness your other little girl was able to step in as a surrogate mother to the puppies. My thoughts and prayers are with you as your grieve. We are always here to listen. We understand the place Rio had in your life, so we understand how difficult it must be to lose her. You have her beautiful puppies with you still, and as others have mentioned, I would definitely keep one in the litter. I'm sure she is watching over you and the puppies, and sending her love to you all. Take your time with this and take care of your self.a

toninm · 12-05-2005, 07:53 AM

I am sooooo sorry about your loss. SOmetimes things happen that we have no control over. but you should no that this is not your fault. God just needed your little precious pup to be and angel pup. I hope that you start to feel better soon!

yorkieusa · 12-05-2005, 08:01 AM

I am so sorry about little Rio. The grief is normal and I believe we always feel guilt, because they are so little and helpless. Guilt is a part of grief, believe it or not. When something is sudden or unexpected, then our hearts are not as prepared for the loss and we feel like our little one's have been too quickly taken from us. However, I really believe that this is a feeling all of us will have, even when the death is a timely one (if there can ever be such a thing where we are all concerned). I cannot tell you how to get over the deep grief you are experiencing. Heck! I'm still in grief over Muffin. The guilt you are feeling is misplaced, but normal. There is no majic pill to take to make the pain go away. You do have to pull yourself up by the boot straps, though, and try to move forward a little more each day. There are some little babies that are in need of your love and care and if you center your attention on them, then perhaps you can then learn to move forward a little more with each passing day.

Francie · 12-05-2005, 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yorkiemom1970

hello everyone,

I have not been on yt much at all since dec. 2. i have suffered the greatest tradgedy of my life other than when i lost my father. my two girls courtney and rio were pregnant as some of you know, and courtney had a rough time, and is now doing great. on the other hand, the love of my life, my rio wasn't so lucky. everything went terribly wrong. i am in tears as i type this so bare with any mis spells...rio deliverd 5 beautiful pups on nov. 29. 3 girls and 2 boys. it was a text book delivery. no problems what so ever. on dec 1st I noticed she had vomited twice. a greenish clear liquid with a bit of her food. i immediately call my vet because i call my vet when my dog's sneeze. well she told me it was probably where she had eaten so many placentas and it had made her sick, (ph call at 8 pm on dec 1) and to bring her in first thing next morn to be safe. well i did just that. she seemed lethargic by the time we arrived. so fast. i cannot express how fast this happened. after a going over, my vet palpated which i had done also and said that something just wasnt "right". they immediately opened her up and there was a tiny re-tained puppy inside her. it was unclear if it was male or female by this time. as they were removing it i felt a sense of relief. then suddenly when she was cut off from anethesia, she didnt wake up. nothing saved her. nothing. every thing was tried. she never woke up. i have lost it. i dont remember driving home with her, i dont remember speaking to several of my friends on the 2nd. i said things to my husband that didnt make sense. i cried until my eyes all but swelled shut. i have just lost my precious girl that i loved with all my heart and i had 4 orphaned babies. (forgot to mention her smallest boy didnt make it on day one) my gift from God was my Courtney who has taken these orphans in as her own. her babies are one week older. if only i had had my girl x rayed. maybe we would have seen the 6th spine and known she didnt pass them all. if only i had done that. i do sometimes, when i have a concern, but i didnt this time. i had no concerns. i am in shock, having hard ti me speaking to people at the moement and am having a hard time leaving my home for anything. these two litters have left me heart broken. i am completely heart broken. i cannot sleep, i cannot eat. i cannot think of anything but how empty i feel at the loss of my girl. she was truly my sidekick. my home is missing something so precious. our lives have been disrupted and we are grief stricken. this all happened so very fast that i do think i went into a mild shock. there were no signs of trouble for 3 days. there was no odor. there was nothing that i felt any concern over. i had no idea anythign was wrong. none at all. she was acting like a proud mommy, she was active. i have always done the very best i could concerning my yorkies. i have now faced the one thing that i prayed for so long that i would never have to face. i happen to love my dogs as my pets even though i am a hobby breeder. the things that we breeders face and go through at times is un-imaginable to some people. my mother said the sweetest thing to me today, she said: "your work involves love, so you have an attachment and most people wouldn't be strong enough to do it with the care you put into and to be able to keep going on with your responsibilites after you have your heart broke. most people dont realize what you can and do go through to have these pups for other people to love" she is right too. it is going to take me years to get over losing her. i am filled with guilt. i have her beautiful daugther from her past litter, my little "bridgit" and the look in her eyes is her mothers. she has been sticking close to me. she knows something's wrong. i now have these 4 precious babies that will never remember their beautiful mother that are like gold to me right now. they are like GOLD. they are more precious to me than any amount of money. they are what is keeping me going and getting me through this. my husband built a resting place for her and she has been placed in my favorite bed of daylilies. i cant believe i'm even typing this right now. i didnt know how i was going to be able to even talk about it. i have had a wonderful person who is my dear dear friend and a blessing to me from God help me through these last 2 days. my dear friend melissa, "annadoodle" has been my rock, my shoulder, my strength.
i had asked her to please not mention this until i was strong enough and ready to talk about it. i had all but decided that i was giving up on my dream, my passion as of 2 days ago. i said no more. then i realized tonight that i cant give up. that i must keep on keeping on and learn from every single thing that happens to me how big or small. the attachment and love that i feel for my yorkies is why i do this in the first place...to give other's the same kind of love i have and that they to desire to have in a yorkie of their own. may you rest in peace my darling girl, mama loves you rio. oh God, somebody please tell me how to take this pain away. i am hurting so bad and i'm confused and i just dont know what to do. i feel like everything is my fault. i want to crawl in a hole but i have to stay strong for my babies. my courtney is my angel sent from heaven. she has taken the babies and is loving them as her own. it is amazing and there is no doubt in my mind that is is a blessing from God for her to have had her babies near the same time. my life will never be the same. sorry this was so long, but i am just ready to let it all out or i'm going to lose it again. she's everywhere i go. every room of my home, there's something of hers, or a place she napped by me or a hair in a brush or something. i'm truly heart broken and i ask you all to pray for me to ease my pain. i have never hurt so bad in my life.

OMG! What a terrible tragedy...my heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry this happened...

Francie

bchgirl · 12-05-2005, 08:09 AM

Oh, I am so sorry. I hope time eases your pain.....
God bless,

Sherry Lynn · 12-05-2005, 08:22 AM

Please know you're in my heart and prayers, Robbie.

miezzi · 12-05-2005, 08:24 AM

My heart goes out to you and your little babies. I wish I had the proper words for you, but I feel that everyone on here has said it best. I will keep you in my thoughts and my prayers to give you the strength you need to make it thru this terrible time.

stingray2042 · 12-05-2005, 08:30 AM

I am so very sorry for your great loss. Your mother is a wise one...about your work being about love...this really opened up my eyes to see the unfortunate side of what breeders risk facing. To lose your beloved girl...is such a tragedy.

Please know that You and Rio have spread much joy and love to others...to those families who now have the joy of loving Rio's pups.

My deepest sympathy to you and your family.

12-05-2005, 06:36 AM	#46
Zeus' Mom Enja's Mom too! Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 2,765	Robbie, I am so very sorry for the loss that you and your family have experienced. My heart goes out to you, as I can only imagine what it has been like for you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. __________________ Farrah, Zeus, Enja & Riley

12-05-2005, 06:36 AM	#47
kara YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Miramar, FL(Origianally a Southern Indiana Girl!) Posts: 302	So sorry for you. I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I know of the feelings of guilt that you spoke of-wishing you knew or that you should have done something else. I have those feelings and I carry them with me everyday since I lost my cocker Alex in 2004. I have not yet been able to forgive myself and move on. I wish for you the strength to get through this. I am very sorry for your loss. __________________ Kara & Matise Let's be pup pals! Click here to educate yourself on Liver Shunts.

12-05-2005, 06:47 AM	#48
txshopper73 Donating YT 14K Club Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Texas Posts: 14,226 Blog Entries: 1	Oh, Robbie! How awful! I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through. You will be kept in my thoughts. __________________ As always...JMO (Just My Opinion) Kimberley

12-05-2005, 07:11 AM	#49
Yorkie YT Addict Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Midlothian, Tx Posts: 374	Robbie, I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling. I could truely feel how hurt you by by your words in your posts and I will keep you, the pups and your family in my prayers. __________________ Sheryl & My Grand Puppies.....Sailor Bear and Lil Mis' Magic Supporting Courtney

12-05-2005, 07:25 AM	#51
Bentley&BitsysMom Donating YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Charlotte Posts: 2,836	Hi Robbie, I read your post last night but was too saddened to even reply. I am SO very sorry about what happened....I do think it's one of the saddest tradgedies I've ever read on here. I have prayed for you and hope that you find peace and comfort in your heart knowing that you have friends here who love you and share your pain and loss. __________________ Michelle BENTLEY, BITSY, CHARLIE, & BAILEY'S Mommy Dogster Pagehttp://www.dogster.com/?145000

12-05-2005, 07:17 AM	#50
simonandhallie *I Love My Monkeys!* Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Falling Waters, WV Posts: 11,166	Robbie, I am so sorry for you! Words escape me, your post was riveting and beautiful! I can feel your pain and I will pray for you and your family! Kimberly~

12-05-2005, 07:29 AM	#52
baili's mom Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Orlando,FL Posts: 147	Robbie, I am so glad you posted. There are so many people here who care about you and are here to listen and be supportive! I told you before I can't imagine the heartbreak you are going thru! But please dont blame yourself. I hope the words from Pat and Irene are comforting to you coming from experts. You have my number and I am here if you want to talk! You are in my prayers sweetie! judi __________________ Judi Baili,Blushi & Bourbi's mommy

12-05-2005, 07:45 AM	#53
centralnewyorki YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Central NY state Posts: 1,741	Robbie, I am so sorry to hear about Rio. Thank goodness your other little girl was able to step in as a surrogate mother to the puppies. My thoughts and prayers are with you as your grieve. We are always here to listen. We understand the place Rio had in your life, so we understand how difficult it must be to lose her. You have her beautiful puppies with you still, and as others have mentioned, I would definitely keep one in the litter. I'm sure she is watching over you and the puppies, and sending her love to you all. Take your time with this and take care of your self.a __________________ Susan & Olivia Visit Olivia's Dogster Page!

12-05-2005, 07:53 AM	#54
toninm My Yorkie is my life Donating Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 1,187	I am sooooo sorry about your loss. SOmetimes things happen that we have no control over. but you should no that this is not your fault. God just needed your little precious pup to be and angel pup. I hope that you start to feel better soon! __________________ Toni & Dollar http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?i=212581

12-05-2005, 08:01 AM	#55
yorkieusa Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 21,173	I am so sorry about little Rio. The grief is normal and I believe we always feel guilt, because they are so little and helpless. Guilt is a part of grief, believe it or not. When something is sudden or unexpected, then our hearts are not as prepared for the loss and we feel like our little one's have been too quickly taken from us. However, I really believe that this is a feeling all of us will have, even when the death is a timely one (if there can ever be such a thing where we are all concerned). I cannot tell you how to get over the deep grief you are experiencing. Heck! I'm still in grief over Muffin. The guilt you are feeling is misplaced, but normal. There is no majic pill to take to make the pain go away. You do have to pull yourself up by the boot straps, though, and try to move forward a little more each day. There are some little babies that are in need of your love and care and if you center your attention on them, then perhaps you can then learn to move forward a little more with each passing day. __________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel

12-05-2005, 08:09 AM	#57
bchgirl Donating YT 10K Club Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: at da beach Posts: 15,444 Blog Entries: 2	Oh, I am so sorry. I hope time eases your pain..... God bless, __________________ Deb, Reese, Reggie, Frazier, Libby, Sidney, & Bodie Trace & Ramsey who watch over us www.biewersbythebay.com

12-05-2005, 08:22 AM	#58
Sherry Lynn Donating YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: New Jersey Posts: 3,437	Please know you're in my heart and prayers, Robbie. __________________ Sherry Lynn Dublin and Widget

12-05-2005, 08:24 AM	#59
miezzi I Love My 3 Lovebugs! Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: north east ohio Posts: 4,776	My heart goes out to you and your little babies. I wish I had the proper words for you, but I feel that everyone on here has said it best. I will keep you in my thoughts and my prayers to give you the strength you need to make it thru this terrible time. __________________ ~Mandy~Proud Mommie to Luigi, Brasco & Livi

12-05-2005, 08:30 AM	#60
stingray2042 Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: San Jose Posts: 40	I am so very sorry for your great loss. Your mother is a wise one...about your work being about love...this really opened up my eyes to see the unfortunate side of what breeders risk facing. To lose your beloved girl...is such a tragedy. Please know that You and Rio have spread much joy and love to others...to those families who now have the joy of loving Rio's pups. My deepest sympathy to you and your family.