Help!! Trying to convince husband - Page 3 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

chachi · 01-13-2012, 06:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monieh30

I would like to than everyone for their prayers, thoughts and suggestions. My husband isn't crazy, he's just firm and stubborn. He won't hurt the puppy if I brought one home, but I don't won't the tension in the household. Especially around my son and the pup. Please keep me in your prayers. I hope that you will allow me to remain a member even though I don't have a Yorkie..I've learn so much and I feel that I have made several friends.

Monieh30

Sweetie you are very welcome to be here whether you have a yorkie or not. We are all friends here and support one another. Im really hoping you are able to get a yorkie in time though because I know its important to you

bodisat · 01-13-2012, 06:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monieh30

I would like to than everyone for their prayers, thoughts and suggestions. My husband isn't crazy, he's just firm and stubborn. He won't hurt the puppy if I brought one home, but I don't won't the tension in the household. Especially around my son and the pup. Please keep me in your prayers. I hope that you will allow me to remain a member even though I don't have a Yorkie..I've learn so much and I feel that I have made several friends.

Monieh30

Like i said, have your hubby pm me any time.

I cant believe the responses i have read thus far. Worse than watching "dance moms".
The choice between a dog and a marriage should not be the discussion here. Not a single person here understands your family, or your situation.
People here need to relax...uugggghhh
A yorkie will break the most hardened man......most dogs will

Just because a person does not feel it is the right time for a dog, does not mean he is not a good husband.
we dont know all the circumstances people. bunch of stresses out there. might just be his way of saying its not the right time.
better than taking a puppy that you cant take care of... right?

KimInMD · 01-13-2012, 06:10 PM

I could be very wrong, but this sounds like a control issue. Your dh needs to be more sensitive, and set a better example for your son (by not laughing at you). The problem with a controlling husband is that he probably also controls the purse strings, which (my guess) is why Monieh 30 needs permission. Yorkies cost money, even those from a shelter. While her husband may not be mean to the Yorkie, he could very well deny the op the funds to care for her fur baby. He could also be jealous if he perceived that the dog was getting more attention or affection than him. Reading between the lines, there are problems here. Help us dear, and give us some more information so that we can give you some solid advice. I'm sorry hubby doesn't seem to be very supportive.

navillusc · 01-13-2012, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovespandp

Sometimes it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permisson :0)

Forgiveness??? Permission??? What's that?

You're a big girl, now...all grown up.

Ask around...grown up macho men sometimes need to be in the presence of these little darlings to understand! Then, they start dressing them up and carrying them around. Find the one your heart says belongs to you, then you can introduce your new baby to the rest of your loved ones.

Maybe that's just what I would do, but that's kind of how it worked here...

Good luck!

Bitsy · 01-13-2012, 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by teacup0819

I have to agree...unless your dh would be abusive to you or your new puppy....I would go ahead with plans on finding a breeder for my pup!

Quote:

Originally Posted by LunasMomma

It's not very nice of them to gang up on you like that

Not including you in any activities and then basically making fun of you is pretty crappy, I'm sorry

Anyway, I'd love to see you get a Yorkie but would be afraid that your husband would demand that you get rid of it, so it would be best to have his blessing first. Is he soft-hearted at all, such as with children or friend's animals? If so, you might get away with the "ask forgiveness" thing, but if not, it could be awful for you and the dog if he wants it out of "his" house.

Good luck with this, I really hope that you can get a baby to love! I don't know what I'd do without my little girls, they are my constant
companions

Quote:

Originally Posted by gemy

Oh dear, this doesn't sound like a happy situation for you. I don't know of course the dynamics of your relationship. but I would suggest to really talk with your husband, try to find out just exactly what are his objections. If he says " I don't want to talk about it now", say Okay, let's set some time aside tomorrow to talk about this. This is important to me.
Don't accept Nope I never want to talk about it.
You could say to him; Having a dog is very important to me. And I need to understand your objection(s). We are all adults here. You have your interests and passions; I want to pursue mine. Please help me to understand your concerns.

I think you should be able to get a pup. I agree with the above posts. Good luck and please keep us posted.

gracielove · 01-13-2012, 06:21 PM

It appears that your husband wants no dog and not just no Yorkie. It sounds to me like he controls you with his temperament. You go along with him in order to keep peace in the house despite the fact that your needs are not being met. It would be nice if you could talk to someone about your situation. A forum is nice and you are surely welcome here but I think you need a live person who can talk with you about your situation objectively. A relationship is two sided. Yes, you need to discuss things with your husband but a flat out no is not a discussion. Find someone to talk to about this relationship and how it is effecting you and how you feel. Sometimes and objective voice can help people look at situations from a different perspective and help you to problem solve.

Bitsy · 01-13-2012, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chachi

Sweetie you are very welcome to be here whether you have a yorkie or not. We are all friends here and support one another. Im really hoping you are able to get a yorkie in time though because I know its important to you

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunny95

I agree! Great post!

Discussing with my husband is not asking for permission. It's about respect and I would expect him to do the same. Of course I want him to immediately agree with me but if he doesn't, I'd just have to work on him a bit!

Agree with both of these too!

gemy · 01-13-2012, 06:42 PM

Moneih30, of course please stay, you are more than welcome, with or without a Yorkie.

This is a great forum with lots of information.

citygirl123 · 01-13-2012, 07:18 PM

Reading all of this made me sad. I hope you will stay around. I joined yorkietalk months before I got a puppy. I loved talking to yorkie owners and viewing yorkie pictures even when I didn't have the dog yet. I will be praying for your situation. I understand about having hubby on board...it makes life easier. I wouldn't have gotten Copper either if my hubby would not go along with it. It wasn't about asking permission, it is about respect for each other. I will be thinking of you.

jmdt · 01-13-2012, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bodisat

Like i said, have your hubby pm me any time.

I cant believe the responses i have read thus far. Worse than watching "dance moms".
The choice between a dog and a marriage should not be the discussion here. Not a single person here understands your family, or your situation.
People here need to relax...uugggghhh
A yorkie will break the most hardened man......most dogs will

Just because a person does not feel it is the right time for a dog, does not mean he is not a good husband.
we dont know all the circumstances people. bunch of stresses out there. might just be his way of saying its not the right time.
better than taking a puppy that you cant take care of... right?

Not sure if you read the part about the laughing at her. sounds like a jerk to me. and he's teaching the son to disrespect her!! I would love to see that happen in my house! Yeah right! If she is trying to talk to him and he turns and walks away!! I don't think so.

MorkieMomma · 01-13-2012, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovespandp

Sometimes it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permisson :0)

Summus Animus · 01-13-2012, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bodisat

Like i said, have your hubby pm me any time.

I cant believe the responses i have read thus far. Worse than watching "dance moms".
The choice between a dog and a marriage should not be the discussion here. Not a single person here understands your family, or your situation.
People here need to relax...uugggghhh
A yorkie will break the most hardened man......most dogs will

Just because a person does not feel it is the right time for a dog, does not mean he is not a good husband.
we dont know all the circumstances people. bunch of stresses out there. might just be his way of saying its not the right time.
better than taking a puppy that you cant take care of... right?

**nodding in agreement**

Donnainohio63 · 01-13-2012, 08:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovespandp

Sometimes it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permisson :0)

This is the way I did it and all it took was for hubby to look into their eyes and he was taken by them. We now have 5

Roccosmommy · 01-14-2012, 04:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Monieh30

I would like to than everyone for their prayers, thoughts and suggestions. My husband isn't crazy, he's just firm and stubborn. He won't hurt the puppy if I brought one home, but I don't won't the tension in the household. Especially around my son and the pup. Please keep me in your prayers. I hope that you will allow me to remain a member even though I don't have a Yorkie..I've learn so much and I feel that I have made several friends.

Monieh30

YES, please stay on YT - of course you are welcomed!

I agree that hubby has to be on board, especially if you get a puppy. There's a lot of work and cost involved, and realistically everyone needs to be in agreement and help out to make a new pup secure and feel loved. DON'T STOP asking

, and in the meantime, read up on everything so you will be well prepared when the day comes to get your pup. Best wishes to you.

Harrysmum · 01-14-2012, 05:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by citygirl123

Reading all of this made me sad. I hope you will stay around. I joined yorkietalk months before I got a puppy. I loved talking to yorkie owners and viewing yorkie pictures even when I didn't have the dog yet. I will be praying for your situation. I understand about having hubby on board...it makes life easier. I wouldn't have gotten Copper either if my hubby would not go along with it. It wasn't about asking permission, it is about respect for each other. I will be thinking of you.

Me too

I think it was the bit about the weird atmosphere and them both laughing at her that got me sad. Can you imagine?

It's 2012 - we've got the vote, and you're a woman.

Goodness me! Sally + Harry x

01-13-2012, 06:10 PM	#33
KimInMD Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Baltimore, MD. Posts: 1,078	I could be very wrong, but this sounds like a control issue. Your dh needs to be more sensitive, and set a better example for your son (by not laughing at you). The problem with a controlling husband is that he probably also controls the purse strings, which (my guess) is why Monieh 30 needs permission. Yorkies cost money, even those from a shelter. While her husband may not be mean to the Yorkie, he could very well deny the op the funds to care for her fur baby. He could also be jealous if he perceived that the dog was getting more attention or affection than him. Reading between the lines, there are problems here. Help us dear, and give us some more information so that we can give you some solid advice. I'm sorry hubby doesn't seem to be very supportive. __________________ Kim- Mom to Lola, Mia, Allie, and Lucy, always in my heart

01-13-2012, 06:42 PM	#38
gemy YT 2000 Club Donating Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Huntsville,Ont,Canaada Posts: 12,335 Blog Entries: 2	Moneih30, of course please stay, you are more than welcome, with or without a Yorkie. This is a great forum with lots of information. __________________ Razzle and Dara. Our clan. RIP Karma Dec 24th 2004-July 14 2013 RIP Zoey Jun9 th 2008-May 12 2012. RIP Magic,Mar 26 2006July 1st 2018

01-13-2012, 07:18 PM	#39
citygirl123 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Southern California Posts: 1,233	Reading all of this made me sad. I hope you will stay around. I joined yorkietalk months before I got a puppy. I loved talking to yorkie owners and viewing yorkie pictures even when I didn't have the dog yet. I will be praying for your situation. I understand about having hubby on board...it makes life easier. I wouldn't have gotten Copper either if my hubby would not go along with it. It wasn't about asking permission, it is about respect for each other. I will be thinking of you. __________________ Lynn and Copper

01-13-2012, 06:21 PM	#36
gracielove YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: NY Posts: 6,582	It appears that your husband wants no dog and not just no Yorkie. It sounds to me like he controls you with his temperament. You go along with him in order to keep peace in the house despite the fact that your needs are not being met. It would be nice if you could talk to someone about your situation. A forum is nice and you are surely welcome here but I think you need a live person who can talk with you about your situation objectively. A relationship is two sided. Yes, you need to discuss things with your husband but a flat out no is not a discussion. Find someone to talk to about this relationship and how it is effecting you and how you feel. Sometimes and objective voice can help people look at situations from a different perspective and help you to problem solve.