I LOST it today on Maxi. Ashamed and needing Help.

[MomofOtis]

First, I want to tell you that I am proud of you for just being honest about your frustrations and what happened - that is the whole point of this forum. Considering the fact that you have already expressed your sorrow and desire not to be in that situation again, you don't need any of our critisism - you just need support and advice. You can read a million books.... you can learn a lot about a breed... and sometimes you can get frustrated even though you KNOW it takes patience to raise a little furbaby ! I have been amazed at how different each little one is --- some yorkies catch on quicker to potty training - or even good behavior. I have a friend who has had several yorkies and they all came with different personalities. The last yorkie she got has been SO HARD for her. She is the most loving, kind, animal friendly person I know - and little Dixie nearly did her in for the first year. And honestly, Dixie is still a little pill - though we all love her! We can't all know what everyone's yorkie is like exactly... we may not all be "tried" in the same ways... but just know that we understand how frustrating it can be !

There have been a lot of good suggestions - and I agree with getting the puppy pads that encourage a "safe" place to pee. AND it sounds like you are on the right track for putting up a play pen of some sort.

Just hang in there --- he will get it sooner than you think !!

[livingdustmops]

Originally Posted by YorkyKids

Boy I am so sad over this incident that I can hardly type. The first advice I would give is the next time you put a puppy on your bed whom you KNOW needs to pee......GET A NEWSPAPER ROLL IT UP and bang yourself over the head several times!!!

Do anything but spank a puppy.....he is a puppy for gosh sakes.....puppies have accidents. He is probably mentally equal to a 8 months old human baby.....do we expect them to be potty trained?.....nope for some human babies it takes 2 or 3 years!! Why would we expect any more of a canine puppy....and a tiny one at that. Most Yorkies will be house broken with LOTS of patience and understanding. Please understand.....HE WILL NOT BE RELIABLE IN HIS HOUSE HABITS UNTIL ABOUT A YEAR OF AGE. Training a puppy is time consuming....If you cannot handle this....I respectfully suggest you find this baby another home. Either that or make up your mind that he will not "get" to you again......spanking can be extremely dangerous for his physical well being....not to mention his mental stability. Is getting this puppy a family affair....is he loved and played with by the whole family....or is he something only you desired to have....this sometimes makes a difference when the training is falling behind....you want him to be "perfect" in his house manners.....to keep peace "maybe?" Using harsh voice or spanking him will only make him afraid....he's KNOWS something is wrong....but he doesn't know what is wrong.....why? Because to pee and poo is a normal body process.....you drink....you pee....you eat....you poop....this is the natural way of things. <g> The best we can hope for is that as he matures he learns exactly what pleases YOU.....he will go to the ends of the earth for YOU....when he is mentally mature....until then....do not expect great feats from such a tiny animal....it just ain't gonna happen.

I would suggest you find a SAFE place for him to stay in your home....running around loose in the apartment is a BIG no no. You need to make his world smaller.....much smaller. Get a baby play pen or a puppy pen or an x-pen....put his bed, food, water, toys and PIDDLE PAPERS....in the pen. When you remove him from his crate.....put him in his safe place until he pees or poos....no exceptions! Then later give him access to say the kitchen....with a gate or something to keep him there. place his pads there.....then begin to let him play for short periods. Until he learns to use his piddle paper. Sleeping in your bed is a BIG no no.....until he is much older and has learned his house manners well. His world should be tiny tiny tiny....when he's learned his lessons...then you give him some freedom.....the better he is the more freedom you give him......but for gosh sakes....make his world PLEASANT at all times. Use "words" if you have to correct him......NEVER his name. When he hears his name it should be like music to his ears! If he makes a mess.....it is YOUR fault not his. Remember he's only doing what comes natural....again it's your job to teach him the proper manners....so just clean up his messes....do not ever punish him again for going potty.

BUT do give lots of love and praise and a treat for doing GOOD....make like it's the most wonderful thing in the world. He will soon get the idea....of what makes mommy HAPPY! Oh and do not associate human emotions to a dog....things are pretty simple to a dog.....he learns what makes his alpha pack member....his human happy by the response he gets....it is action verus reaction. When he makes you happy that's an action.....your happiness is a reaction....dogs know this "drill" very well and they respond to it....whether it happy or negative...they respond in kind....either with tail wagging happiness or great sadness and hurt with tail tucked and head down.....and the worst effect of punishment is "fear biting".....that's when it usually all over for a dog....when they become a BITING DOG.....well duh....what made them that way....the human who is charged with his care.

Well I know I'm rambling....but I felt the need to give you some insight into the dogs thinking. A dog is probably the world most unique animal....he is the eternal optimist.....he will lick the hand which is cruel to him time and time again! Don't ever forget that....gain his trust and do not ever let him down again....you will be rewarded over and over again. So don't let some a small matter as sloppy house manners get between you and your dog....okay? Enjoy him while he is a puppy.....you will not see these days again....as he matures he will change into a different personnality. I'm sorry if I have offended you....but I have had relationships with dogs for over 50 years....I have NEVER hit one yet. Be patient....be kind and your dog WILL reward you with his eternal love and devotion. But again....if you think you cannot handle this....please try to find him another home....I'm not trying to be mean...just honest!
d
PS...about the crumbs....well duh....he's a dog that's what dogs do....they will sniff every morsel of food available to them. <G>

All I can say is WOW! What a powerful message! Many people on YT will learn a great deal about dogs, how they think and how they act from your message. Many of these things need to be said!

[YorkyKids]

Originally Posted by livingdustmops

All I can say is WOW! What a powerful message! Many people on YT will learn a great deal about dogs, how they think and how they act from your message. Many of these things need to be said!

I hope I didn't offend Maxi's mom or anyone else.....I sure did not intend to offend her. I just felt the need to speak for the dog! That's all.
Maxi's mom....I know you are upset by what happened and I only hope my message helps you understand your puppy.....comming here to talk about it is probably the best thing (and bravest) you could have done......bravo for you Maxi's mom!!
d

[ReesesMom]

I understand that it can be frustrating. I am going through the same thing with my little baby now. He is also sick and has to stay inside and like your baby, my bed seems to be his favorite place. With that said, just because you get frustrated doesn't mean that you get physical. I know you are sorry, but what about the next time you get that frustrated. Like YorkyKids said, you have already commited a big NO NO with letting the puppy have run of the house. Let a 3 month old child have run of your house with no diaper on and you will have the same results.

[ilovelouie]

Hi, Im sorry to hear that you got frusterated with your pup. When I first got Louie about 8 months ago he was 16 wks old. I had wall to wall white burber carpeting in my house. Luckily I had nice hardwood floors underneith so I had my husband tear up the carpeting because he was not trained yet and would have accidents. It is so much easier now to pick up the accidents and not get frustrated with small stains. So I guess my advice to you is to keep the pup and get rid of the carpet lol. Good luck to you and God Bless!

[Shanatink]

"Boy I am so sad over this incident that I can hardly type. The first advice I would give is the next time you put a puppy on your bed whom you KNOW needs to pee......GET A NEWSPAPER ROLL IT UP and bang yourself over the head several times!!!" - yorkykids

I think this was a bit harsh. SHe said she is devasted by what she did and it took a lot of guts for her to be honest and tell us that and she is asking for our help. I dont think yelling at someone is going to help. She wouldnt have asked for our help if she didnt care a lot about her yorkie. Im starting to feel like this forum is the last place someone can go to for yorkie help.

Nobody's perfect and nothing is easy, which is why people go to a public forum to seek help. I think we all need to focus more on helping people than judging them.

[MeganS]

Originally Posted by Shanatink

"Boy I am so sad over this incident that I can hardly type. The first advice I would give is the next time you put a puppy on your bed whom you KNOW needs to pee......GET A NEWSPAPER ROLL IT UP and bang yourself over the head several times!!!" - yorkykids

I think this was a bit harsh. SHe said she is devasted by what she did and it took a lot of guts for her to be honest and tell us that and she is asking for our help. I dont think yelling at someone is going to help. She wouldnt have asked for our help if she didnt care a lot about her yorkie. Im starting to feel like this forum is the last place someone can go to for yorkie help.

Nobody's perfect and nothing is easy, which is why people go to a public forum to seek help. I think we all need to focus more on helping people than judging them.

Exactly, thank you Shana! And she also asked not to be told or "suggested at" to find a new home for him. Which was done in that same post.

[crystalsmom]

Originally Posted by YorkyKids

Boy I am so sad over this incident that I can hardly type. The first advice I would give is the next time you put a puppy on your bed whom you KNOW needs to pee......GET A NEWSPAPER ROLL IT UP and bang yourself over the head several times!!!

Do anything but spank a puppy.....he is a puppy for gosh sakes.....puppies have accidents. He is probably mentally equal to a 8 months old human baby.....do we expect them to be potty trained?.....nope for some human babies it takes 2 or 3 years!! Why would we expect any more of a canine puppy....and a tiny one at that. Most Yorkies will be house broken with LOTS of patience and understanding. Please understand.....HE WILL NOT BE RELIABLE IN HIS HOUSE HABITS UNTIL ABOUT A YEAR OF AGE. Training a puppy is time consuming....If you cannot handle this....I respectfully suggest you find this baby another home. Either that or make up your mind that he will not "get" to you again......spanking can be extremely dangerous for his physical well being....not to mention his mental stability. Is getting this puppy a family affair....is he loved and played with by the whole family....or is he something only you desired to have....this sometimes makes a difference when the training is falling behind....you want him to be "perfect" in his house manners.....to keep peace "maybe?" Using harsh voice or spanking him will only make him afraid....he's KNOWS something is wrong....but he doesn't know what is wrong.....why? Because to pee and poo is a normal body process.....you drink....you pee....you eat....you poop....this is the natural way of things. <g> The best we can hope for is that as he matures he learns exactly what pleases YOU.....he will go to the ends of the earth for YOU....when he is mentally mature....until then....do not expect great feats from such a tiny animal....it just ain't gonna happen.

I would suggest you find a SAFE place for him to stay in your home....running around loose in the apartment is a BIG no no. You need to make his world smaller.....much smaller. Get a baby play pen or a puppy pen or an x-pen....put his bed, food, water, toys and PIDDLE PAPERS....in the pen. When you remove him from his crate.....put him in his safe place until he pees or poos....no exceptions! Then later give him access to say the kitchen....with a gate or something to keep him there. place his pads there.....then begin to let him play for short periods. Until he learns to use his piddle paper. Sleeping in your bed is a BIG no no.....until he is much older and has learned his house manners well. His world should be tiny tiny tiny....when he's learned his lessons...then you give him some freedom.....the better he is the more freedom you give him......but for gosh sakes....make his world PLEASANT at all times. Use "words" if you have to correct him......NEVER his name. When he hears his name it should be like music to his ears! If he makes a mess.....it is YOUR fault not his. Remember he's only doing what comes natural....again it's your job to teach him the proper manners....so just clean up his messes....do not ever punish him again for going potty.

BUT do give lots of love and praise and a treat for doing GOOD....make like it's the most wonderful thing in the world. He will soon get the idea....of what makes mommy HAPPY! Oh and do not associate human emotions to a dog....things are pretty simple to a dog.....he learns what makes his alpha pack member....his human happy by the response he gets....it is action verus reaction. When he makes you happy that's an action.....your happiness is a reaction....dogs know this "drill" very well and they respond to it....whether it happy or negative...they respond in kind....either with tail wagging happiness or great sadness and hurt with tail tucked and head down.....and the worst effect of punishment is "fear biting".....that's when it usually all over for a dog....when they become a BITING DOG.....well duh....what made them that way....the human who is charged with his care.

Well I know I'm rambling....but I felt the need to give you some insight into the dogs thinking. A dog is probably the world most unique animal....he is the eternal optimist.....he will lick the hand which is cruel to him time and time again! Don't ever forget that....gain his trust and do not ever let him down again....you will be rewarded over and over again. So don't let some a small matter as sloppy house manners get between you and your dog....okay? Enjoy him while he is a puppy.....you will not see these days again....as he matures he will change into a different personnality. I'm sorry if I have offended you....but I have had relationships with dogs for over 50 years....I have NEVER hit one yet. Be patient....be kind and your dog WILL reward you with his eternal love and devotion. But again....if you think you cannot handle this....please try to find him another home....I'm not trying to be mean...just honest!
d
PS...about the crumbs....well duh....he's a dog that's what dogs do....they will sniff every morsel of food available to them. <G>

I was going to give her a website with info but you covered it better than
they did. Just one thing I might add is only give a treat if you see him pee
or poop not later. If outside bring the treat with you because if you wait
til you come in they have no idea what it is for at all. I know you said you've
had him for a month but how old is he. I'm not so sure that yorkies are so
hard to train orcould be it's that they are so tiny and people figure it's such alittle
to clean up and the dog gets used to doing it anywhere and then it is very
hard to change the habit. I wish you luck but it's lots of hard work and if
you think you are not up to it, it would be better for both you to find a new
home for him.

[ehunney]

I'm sorry about what happened.I'm going through he same thing with tucker right now. Just hang in there, it eventually gets better.....or so people tell me ! Instead of spanking, i pick him up, say a firm no Tucker! and place him back on his pad or paper. Also, while an owner should never spank there little one, please don't beat youself up over it anymore, it's very obvious that this won't ever happen again,and that your a good person and good owner. Right now you DO NOT need to be criticized, just given good advice, because criticism will not help you or your little one out.We have all lost our "cool" with our babies in some shape or form before,and would be lying if we said otherwise. Just be patient with him.Hope things get better,and I give you Huge thumbs up for aking for help !

[yorkieusa]

I've had my furbaby for 1 month (December 1). He is a delight. Although, there are some issues. He is still being treated for kennel cough and on 2 cough suppressants and an antibiotic.

He's been in your home less than a month.

He should be in a limited area unless you can watch him closely.

Please remember that a puppy has a very, very small bladder and also does not know when they need to go to the bathroom. It just happens - like babies.

[lily's mom]

Potty training is just a nightmare for most of us. It is dicouraging, but hang in there. I have to tell ya, I have had Lily for 9 months and she still goes in the house when she feel like it.
About getting a gate; PLEASE be careful with that!!!! I get very nervous when ever someone talks about using one. Just be aware they usually try to climb them and get hung up by their collar. Please put duct tape over the top or remove the collar when you aren't around. I am a very nervous nellie about gates now. I have heard more horror stories about them than I care too.

[YorkyKids]

Originally Posted by Shanatink

"Boy I am so sad over this incident that I can hardly type. The first advice I would give is the next time you put a puppy on your bed whom you KNOW needs to pee......GET A NEWSPAPER ROLL IT UP and bang yourself over the head several times!!!" - yorkykids

I think this was a bit harsh. SHe said she is devasted by what she did and it took a lot of guts for her to be honest and tell us that and she is asking for our help. I dont think yelling at someone is going to help. She wouldnt have asked for our help if she didnt care a lot about her yorkie. Im starting to feel like this forum is the last place someone can go to for yorkie help.

Nobody's perfect and nothing is easy, which is why people go to a public forum to seek help. I think we all need to focus more on helping people than judging them.

my goodness.....that comment was meant to get her attention!! I think my post was informative and helpful.....and again I meant it to get Maxi's mom attention. Would you rather I not be HARSH (as you say) and find out later that someone's (not really this example)....but to find out later that someone's dog died from a moment of "rage".....would you rather that happen? I don't think so. My intent was to get her attention.....and then to try and help Maxi's mom understand the workings of puppy care....that's it.

Abuse is abuse....whether it happens in someone's "nice" bedroom or in someone's back yard.....like we just read today on this forum about a man who buried his dog alive.....it's all abuse....can you explain why it is any different? Why should we condem one person and then sugar coat another person with "frilly" soothing comments? I saw a chance to help someone and I took it....so sorry if you and some others feel that way....but IMO you need to grow up and look around....be proud we can help people that come here and ask for it.

I do know this.....if I reached Maxi's mom.....if I helped her understand then I do not regret one word. I'm proud that she had the guts to step up.....reveal what she did.....and ask for help!! That took a lot of courage on Maxi's mom part....it never easy for one to talk about their mistakes....
d

[YorkieRose]

I sent a 4 month old to Texas recently. His new owner says he is using the pads 100%..I do not train my pups, I let them train themselves. In fact I do very little except keep the floors free of the smell of urine.

He was only on carpet with a BELLY BAND on..I use washable wee wee pads in each room..also scatter rugs that can be easily removed and washed.
When a pup walks around and does not smell where they have peed on the floor, they naturally begin to radiate to the pee pad that has the urine smell they are sniffing for...takes a few weeks.
At night he was penned with a pad in his pen (you can buy 12inx12)..when he left I sent a pad.
You can't shampoo rugs none stop..so pup needs to be kept off anything that can not be washed and rid of the previous accident.

[MuffinsMom]

Sorry about your hard training times. I admit to losing my cool already with Muffin for being stubborn and refusing to walk. Dont take anyones comments personal. The "perfect" ones who have never lost their cool..Well good for you! I find it amazing to not lose your cool at times, because they are very hard to train. I have only had Muffin for a short time, but I see this. But to those that actually admit this...Well very very good for you! Cause this will only make you a better mommy to learn from mistakes and how to handle it differently. I wish you the best of luck! I dont let Muffin out alot unless I am right by his side. Otherwise he is in his very small area, so he learns that that is his only area to go to the bathroom. And when I start to let him out more, then I will expand his area but not by much. Anyways, glad you came to ask for help and advice. Dont feel guilty, it happens. Just try to change it. Just like children. I have lost my cool with my son and I have spanked him. Its one thing to discipline but another to abuse. And I believe that could fall into either catagory, according to some people. Best wishes! MuffinsMom

[MeganS]

Originally Posted by lily's mom

Potty training is just a nightmare for most of us. It is dicouraging, but hang in there. I have to tell ya, I have had Lily for 9 months and she still goes in the house when she feel like it.
About getting a gate; PLEASE be careful with that!!!! I get very nervous when ever someone talks about using one. Just be aware they usually try to climb them and get hung up by their collar. Please put duct tape over the top or remove the collar when you aren't around. I am a very nervous nellie about gates now. I have heard more horror stories about them than I care too.

Wow Dawn, I never thought of that. Great advice!