I'm only 15... why do I have to even think about this???

[Chelsea15]

Today my boyfriend's best friend's gf had a baby. they're both 17. So is Nathan (my boyfriend).

I'm 15 and its just so hard, watching him enter adulthood without me. he's thinking about college and marriage and today, after seeing Avery (the new baby), even kids . I feel so lonely.

I'm just so scared b/c I've always told myself, we're only teenagers, this relationship isnt forever. but now I'm faced with that reality, that it might actually NOT last forever. I never realized I loved him like I just did.

I just feel like I cant (well, wont) give him the things he wants for a long time. and i'm scared he wont want to wait for me.

Sorry if you guys dont appreciate a teenager coming in and posting about things like this. just venting.

[Txgurl06]

its stuff we have all went through and you are ONLY 15 you have your whole life ahead of you. If he cant wait for you then hes not the one for you. Keep your head up and have fun!!! At 15 i wasnt thinking about kids i was just having fun and being a teenager. You are way to young to think about marriage or kids and he should understand that. I know you love him and having an older guy can look and be cool but you gotta just be careful.

All im saying is just be 15 and have fun!! Im only 20 so im not far from you! just let life take its course and relax. The only thing you should really worry about is grades. Of course we all worry about boys but put that second lol!

Also my 15 yr old cousin just had a baby and its not all what she thought it would be! She hates waking up in the middle of the night and shes soo scared when the baby crys and crys and she doesnt know what to do! Shes too young to have that motherly instinct IMO! She wants to live life and be 15 and now she has a baby! TRUST ME take your time!

[MyFairLacy]

Wow! I'm 22 and not even thinking about getting married...let alone having children (although I don't want children). I can't imagine being 17 and having a baby! Stay young while you can...I have a friend that got married right out of highschool and she and her husband had a lot of problems for the first couple years..they were both still trying to grow up. Now they've been married for 4 1/2 years and just within the past year have they really grown up and have a "mature" marriage.

[Tillys_mom]

I have to agree with TxGurl06. You are only 15. He should understand that. You don't want to be tied down with a baby at that age. Enjoy your teenage years, you'll never get them back. If he isn't willing to wait for you then he must not care for the relationship. If he cares then he will wait for ya.

[sabsab00]

Originally Posted by Tillys_mom

I have to agree with TxGurl06. You are only 15. He should understand that. You don't want to be tied down with a baby at that age. Enjoy your teenage years, you'll never get them back. If he isn't willing to wait for you then he must not care for the relationship. If he cares then he will wait for ya.

[Chelsea15]

thanks. its just so confusing.

[Txgurl06]

also most and i say MOST guys that age wont take responsibilty for babies and that goes for women too. The guy is young he wants to enjoy school and doesnt want to get a job to raise and support a family! Also when you get pregnant a lot of teen age guys leave and go be with other women because your body changes and sometimes you wont look the same. Guys that young arent always mature enough to understand these changes.

my cousins baby's daddy left her and slept with another girl right after the baby was born. now he is in jail and wont be out for a while for other reasons. I mean he was only 16 he honestly wasnt ready to be held down. No matter if they talked about it or not when something is pushed in on you and you feel pressured you get scared.


Now like i said this is not to all young guys but to some!

[Saleswman]

I am just impressed that you have given this that much thought....I will tell you.....although you may not want to hear it.......he probably wont be the guy you marry, so to give him what he seems to want now....will only prevent you from giving it first to the man you marry...make sense..???

Even if you decide one day.....NOT At 15.....to be intimate......then it should be after you have really, really made sure of the consequenses......and in this day.......it could be a death sentence......sorry to say.....herpes, aids.....PID....other really scary issues....just enjoy being 15.......stay busy, think of graduation, football, college, all the things that will keep your mind off of the pressure your feeling....

Good luck to you sweetie......talk to your Mom....or another older female.....they will offer good advice....

[Chelsea15]

yea. I really really really want to go to vet school, so that's 10 more years of school before I even start my career. and I want to be comfortable with that before I even think about kids. at this point i'm not even sure I WANT kids. I want babies, but teenagers? no way.

[Tiggerwit]

Talk to your folks. I have an 18 & 16 year old. My 18 year old thinks she's going on 30 and is just trying to grow up so fast, faster then kids should. You have your whole future ahead of you please don't throw that away. Being 15 means you still have a whole lot of life to live.

[Chelsea15]

Originally Posted by Saleswman

I am just impressed that you have given this that much thought....I will tell you.....although you may not want to hear it.......he probably wont be the guy you marry, so to give him what he seems to want now....will only prevent you from giving it first to the man you marry...make sense..???

Even if you decide one day.....NOT At 15.....to be intimate......then it should be after you have really, really made sure of the consequenses......and in this day.......it could be a death sentence......sorry to say.....herpes, aids.....PID....other really scary issues....just enjoy being 15.......stay busy, think of graduation, football, college, all the things that will keep your mind off of the pressure your feeling....

Good luck to you sweetie......talk to your Mom....or another older female.....they will offer good advice....

Yea, I've always told myself that, "he probably wont be the guy you marry" thing. but i was never forced to face it head on until now.

And I dont mean pressure to have sex. He's never pressured me for anything like that, but we've already "been intimate" with the right protection. And we were both virgins. And I've talked to my mom about it. That's not what I'm getting at.


I'm afraid b/c he wants these things not now, but in "a few years" (direct quote from him) and I wont be ready by then.

[Txgurl06]

dont worry about a few years!! tell him in a few years you will be graduating and going to college to do something you always dreamed of doing!!! Those same things should be in his plans not kids! not yet at least!! In highschool you never know what can happen so i say take one day at a time.

[Chelsea15]

Originally Posted by Txgurl06

dont worry about a few years!! tell him in a few years you will be graduating and going to college to do something you always dreamed of doing!!! Those same things should be in his plans not kids! not yet at least!! In highschool you never know what can happen so i say take one day at a time.

he already knows what i want to do and he loves it. I think I'm just scaring myself, but that doesn't make it any less scary

[missPenny]

I wouldn't worry too much (if you can help it). A lot can happen in a few years. I'm 28 and always thought I wanted kids. Now I'm not so sure whereas a year ago I had a bit of baby fever. Life will take you through so many phases... so enjoy the teen phase and keep focus on your dreams!

[SugarMama]

Oh honey, I feel for you. I remember being 15 and in love. It's such a confusing time. Just remember your dreams and try to enjoy being a teenager.