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01-10-2007, 05:18 PM | #1 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 829
| Depressed & Confused :( As most of you know, I am having twin boys in June. Well at the beginning things were really bad and then they got better. Now they are back to bad again. The father and I have been trying 2 work things out and I have been really nice to him because since he is the father I think he should deserve a chance to be in their life regardless of what an a$$ he was when he found out. Well eventually everything started going good between us until now. I just hate him. He is such a jerk. Before I got pregnant I planned on moving to PR to attend UPR. Now that is out of the question so I decided to go 2 a university in Chicago. When I told the father I still want to go to school he started putting me down and telling me I can't and that I ruined my life!! And I know I shouldn't listen to him but it is so hard when he is the main person there. And ugh it is just really frustrating me. I really want to continue going to school and eventually become a doctor, do you think that is really impossible now? And then the father is just such an a$$hole that I don't even want him around anymore. He is always putting me down and making me feel so bad. He is always telling me that without him I'm nothing and won't be able to do anything with my life or with the kids and that they will get taken away from me. And I know it will be extremely hard without him, but does that mean I have to put up with him treating me like this? Is it wrong for me not to want him around anymore? When I play the whole situation in my head I feel like I am being so selfish but I'm to the point where I'm so confused and depressed that I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. |
Welcome Guest! | |
01-10-2007, 05:25 PM | #2 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 829
| sorry 4 the long post |
01-10-2007, 05:27 PM | #3 | |
BANNED! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: USA
Posts: 9,999
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01-10-2007, 05:30 PM | #4 |
The grace of god Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: LA
Posts: 1,945
| I agree with YorkieShadow!
__________________ Gracie Lou |
01-10-2007, 05:32 PM | #5 |
Mia, Max and Moe's Mom Donating Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 4,403
| Jessica. Please, please, do not let this guy put you down like that! You have 2 beautiful babies trying to grow inside you. They "need" you and they need you to be healthy and happy. It's not going to be easy, I think you know that, but it IS possible to go back to school after you have the babies. Yes, you'll need help - in many ways - but it is out there. I commend you for wanting to be a Dr. Don't ever give up your dream! And remember, Twins are "special". Best Wishes and Congratulations on your Twins!
__________________ Connie Mia Max Moe |
01-10-2007, 05:42 PM | #6 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Albany
Posts: 186
| Jessica, I know exactly how you feel. I was in a similar situation 7 yrs ago. He was just horrible when he found out I was pregnant. I tried to MAKE it work. But now I realize that if you feel like you are MAKING it work....it is not worth it. When my daughter was 6 months old I made a decision to leave the relationship. It wasn't until my daughter was 3 that he decided that he wants to be a father and I will never take that away from him. Jessica if you want to be a doctor, there is NOTHING standing in your way. Granted being a mother is going to become your first priority, but being a mother is also what may be the force that drives you to be everything that you want to be in this life. I will pray that things get better for you. I will also pray for your peace of mind. I know that it is easy for me to say, but don't let his harsh words crush your dreams and aspirations. I am rooting for you!!!!
__________________ Tameika and Beauty "Good Things Come To Those Who Wait" |
01-10-2007, 05:49 PM | #7 |
Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: CA, San Jose/ San Diego
Posts: 55
| You are SOOO blessed to be having twins! You should be REALLY excited ( well I am for you)! Don't ever give up on your hopes & dreams EVER!! Having the babies may slow you down a little but your life is NOT over but only beginning!!! When the little ones come I'm sure his attitude will change! If all he does is put you down then don't share your thoughts & dreams with him! Later down the road you could always give him another chance! Don't let him bring you down girl! University in Chicago is a great school, I'm jealous! What are you thinking about naming the boys!?!? |
01-10-2007, 05:58 PM | #8 | |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 829
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01-10-2007, 06:24 PM | #9 |
YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Alabama
Posts: 2,225
| well the fact is he will be involved in one way or another with you for the rest of your life because your going to have babies together! you can go to school and be a great dr whatever you want and set your mind to if you want it bad enough you can do it no matter what anyone says or thinks! what you need to worry about most is yourself and your babies. but the babys will consume the majority of your time & life it's all about them when they are born!
__________________ A pet's love is true right from the start, through good times and bad, like sharing one heart. |
01-10-2007, 07:57 PM | #10 |
Just me 'n my boys Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Murphy, TX
Posts: 4,596
| Sounds like you already know he's not the one for you. Please keep that in mind down the road when things seem good. As for being a doctor, honey you can do anything you put your mind to. It will be hard, but I say go for it.
__________________ "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone is fighting some kind of battle." Alphy 's Roxy |
01-10-2007, 08:03 PM | #11 |
I Love Thor Donating Member | Girl, he is trying to keep you scared and make you think that you need him in your life. That is NOT true. You are strong and you're going to get through this. He should be kissing your feet right now and if he is stressing you out like this and putting you down, I would cut him off. Stress is harsh on your body and also has negative effects on your growing chilren. Take a deep breath and think about your new life with your new boys! You can do ANYTHING!! Congrats on the boys btw, I was out of town and missed that huge announcement! Keep your head up girl. I know it's tough since he's your babies father, but don't let him bring you down. |
01-10-2007, 08:24 PM | #12 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: INDIANA
Posts: 4,449
| Don't let anyone tell you you cant do it. You can do it. It would be best to finish school so that you can financially support you and your baby boys. It will be hard and alot of work, but YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!! Hope things get better. Men are jerks most of the time and alot of men need to grow up alot and face life...Some do and Some never do. Good Luck Hun don't give up your dreams. |
01-11-2007, 01:32 PM | #13 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: California
Posts: 5,368
| Prove him wrong ,you will be bettter off without his attitude dragging you and the kids down. |
01-11-2007, 01:44 PM | #14 |
Donating YT 12K Club Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Council Bluffs Iowa
Posts: 12,552
| His verbal abuse and disrespect is his way of controlling you. Tell the jerk to take a hike. You are far better off without him, and if your goal is to become a Dr. then more power to yiou. It might take longer, but it's not impossible. There is so much help out there for single Moms, you're almost better off without a man. I think the kids deserve to know their father, but I don't agree that it is always what is best. It usually just complicates things, especailly if the father is disrespectful to the mother. I wish you the best of luck in what ever you decide to do. But sweetie, Dont's EVER let a man put you down, control you or abuse you. |
01-11-2007, 01:49 PM | #15 | |
I Love My Yorkies Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
Posts: 37,147
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__________________ Chachi's & Jewels Mom Jewels http://www.dogster.com/?132431Chachi http://www.dogster.com/?132427 | |
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