I'm Pregnant... =/ - Page 3 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

sweetr72 · 11-14-2006, 02:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tiggerwit

My boyfriends sister has done this. They've adopted two kids and the moms are still involved in their lives. She's a close family friend.

Adoption is a great choice if you feel too young to raise a baby. My birth mom had me when she was 17 and I was adopted as a baby. I had a GREAT life and found my birth mom when I was in my early 20's...she has always felt she made the right decision for me..and so do I. Now that they have open adoptions as an option it would make it so much easier than way back when, when the adoption was closed and the records sealed for 18 years.

On the other hand I had my son at 19 and was waaay too immature looking back, to have a baby..but I did and grew up fast. If you feel like you can handle it finanicially, emotionally..etc..then go find a support group of young mothers and speak with them. Good luck with your decision...its a tough one.

Dawn

Katys mom · 11-14-2006, 02:22 PM

OK, this is very personal and I don't want to scare you either. I found myself very young and in your situation as well. I was receiving a lot of pressure to have an abortion. I just couldn't do it.

I have a lot of faith in God. Sometimes we can not see down the road, but he can.

I can not begin to tell you how grateful I am that I did not abort my beautiful daughter. You see, what I didn't know is, I had a problem from the IUD I was using. She would be the only child I would have. (I did not find this out until years later after trying to have another baby), If I had aborted her, I would not have had any children.

Now, I realize that your situation is not the same, but I truly believe that God has a purpose for everything. He has the road map and is all knowing.

Share your situation with your parents. Ask them for a private meeting, be prepared for them to be upset, they will be OK. Seek their guidance and wisdom. You will need to draw on their strength.

Edited after I saw that you thought that they would kick you out. I agree talk to your sister.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Tiggerwit · 11-14-2006, 02:24 PM

Maybe your parents regret the choice they made with your sister and wouldn't make that mistake with you.

I know it's hard, but you need to do what's right for you. If your boyfriend is not supportive now, what's it going to be like in the future? I understand that your decision will affect him in the long run but if you don't believe in abortion then don't do it and don't let him talk you into it. There are other options. If you feel you aren't ready for this, then give this baby a chance with a loving family that will adopt him/her. Find an organization where you will be able to stay involved in the childs life.

I am a mother of a 17 year old. Of course I want more for her, but things happen and you just deal with it. I would be disappointed, I won't lie to you, but what's done is done and my being angry isn't going to help or change anything.

Hang in there. Is there someone you can talk to? Church, school counselor?

RLC12345678 · 11-14-2006, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katys mom

OK, this is very personal and I don't want to scare you either. I found myself very young and in your situation as well. I was receiving a lot of pressure to have an abortion. I just couldn't do it.

I have a lot of faith in God. Sometimes we can not see down the road, but he can.

I can not begin to tell you how grateful I am that I did not abort my beautiful daughter. You see, what I didn't know is, I had a problem from the IUD I was using. She would be the only child I would have. (I did not find this out until years later after trying to have another baby), If I had aborted her, I would not have had any children.

Now, I realize that your situation is not the same, but I truly believe that God has a purpose for everything. He has the road map and is all knowing.

Share your situation with your parents. Ask them for a private meeting, be prepared for them to be upset, they will be OK. Seek their guidance and wisdom. You will need to draw on their strength.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Jessica, this is a perfect example of what I was talking about. God knows the plans he has for you....this pregnancy is what he has planned for you. It really sux now, but God can see the big picture and this is something that is going to "prosper you and not harm you."

red98vett · 11-14-2006, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sweetr72

Adoption is a great choice if you feel too young to raise a baby. My birth mom had me when she was 17 and I was adopted as a baby. I had a GREAT life and found my birth mom when I was in my early 20's...she has always felt she made the right decision for me..and so do I. Now that they have open adoptions as an option it would make it so much easier than way back when, when the adoption was closed and the records sealed for 18 years.

On the other hand I had my son at 19 and was waaay too immature looking back, to have a baby..but I did and grew up fast. If you feel like you can handle it finanicially, emotionally..etc..then go find a support group of young mothers and speak with them. Good luck with your decision...its a tough one.

Dawn

I'm adopted too - can't imagine my life without my 'parents' - I don't know why... only that my real mom was very young too. Adoption is wonderful and these days so much easier than it was back when my parents were trying to adopt.

Dawgcrazee · 11-14-2006, 02:27 PM

I was 17 when I had my first child. It can be done. You need to confide in your parents. And like a couple others said. Stay in school. The Lord be with you and yours.
Blessings,
Teri

RLC12345678 · 11-14-2006, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by red98vett

I'm adopted too - can't imagine my life without my 'parents' - I don't know why... only that my real mom was very young too. Adoption is wonderful and these days so much easier than it was back when my parents were trying to adopt.

Adoption is such a wonderful blessing. Faith Hill is adopted. Isn't that interesting?!

Alliec1 · 11-14-2006, 02:36 PM

Adoption is a great thing, but can you handle that emotionally, as well?

I must honestly say that if I were in your shoes, I would choose an abortion. I understand how you may feel about your unborn child, but you must remember yourself. I know it sounds selfish, but in this situation, you have every right to be selfish and do what is right for you. Your future matters to you, you are living, breathing, here right now..the fetus isn't. I'm sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but it's just my 2 cents. It reminds me of a situation that's often been talked about: If a pregant woman would get into, say, a car crash, and they could only save her or the baby, which would they choose? I say the mother; the baby has no real 'life' yet. The connection I'm making here is that it is your life that you will have to live, despite the decision you make.

RLC12345678 · 11-14-2006, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alliec1

Adoption is a great thing, but can you handle that emotionally, as well?

I must honestly say that if I were in your shoes, I would choose an abortion. I understand how you may feel about your unborn child, but you must remember yourself. I know it sounds selfish, but in this situation, you have every right to be selfish and do what is right for you. Your future matters to you, you are living, breathing, here right now..the fetus isn't. I'm sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but it's just my 2 cents. It reminds me of a situation that's often been talked about: If a pregant woman would get into, say, a car crash, and they could only save her or the baby, which would they choose? I say the mother; the baby has no real 'life' yet. The connection I'm making here is that it is your life that you will have to live, despite the decision you make.

I'm sorry...but all those who are adopted themselves would beg to differ with you. I am sure they are thankful that their mother's weren't "selfish."

21sunshine · 11-14-2006, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alliec1

Adoption is a great thing, but can you handle that emotionally, as well?

I must honestly say that if I were in your shoes, I would choose an abortion. I understand how you may feel about your unborn child, but you must remember yourself. I know it sounds selfish, but in this situation, you have every right to be selfish and do what is right for you. Your future matters to you, you are living, breathing, here right now..the fetus isn't. I'm sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but it's just my 2 cents. It reminds me of a situation that's often been talked about: If a pregant woman would get into, say, a car crash, and they could only save her or the baby, which would they choose? I say the mother; the baby has no real 'life' yet. The connection I'm making here is that it is your life that you will have to live, despite the decision you make.

I'm sorry, but I just don't see how someone can ask: "can you handle that emotionally" meaning adopting. I think knowing you saved your babies life and put them first and foremost would make you and everyone around you know you loved that child before you ever saw it, enough to put it before you. That is important. I personally couldn't live knowing I had ending my child's life.

I know this would be hard. But my sister-in-law had 2 children by the time she was 17 and had no parents, and she made it. She is now happily married to my brother, who adopted her kids and they have another child together. She is going to deliver kids when she finishes college and she wants to counsel young girls in the same position as you. She is 25 now and her life didn't straighten out until about 4 years ago when she met my brother. Her 2 kids "biological" dad is horrible but you will find that man who will love and support you and your children. God always has a reason, even if it takes a while to see.

I hope this helps, and I will pray for you.

Sugar's Mom · 11-14-2006, 02:48 PM

I am very grateful my biological mother wanted more for me than what she could give me so she gave me up. I have had a wonderful life because of it.

sweetr72 · 11-14-2006, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alliec1

Adoption is a great thing, but can you handle that emotionally, as well?

I must honestly say that if I were in your shoes, I would choose an abortion. I understand how you may feel about your unborn child, but you must remember yourself. I know it sounds selfish, but in this situation, you have every right to be selfish and do what is right for you. Your future matters to you, you are living, breathing, here right now..the fetus isn't. I'm sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but it's just my 2 cents. It reminds me of a situation that's often been talked about: If a pregant woman would get into, say, a car crash, and they could only save her or the baby, which would they choose? I say the mother; the baby has no real 'life' yet. The connection I'm making here is that it is your life that you will have to live, despite the decision you make.

Whew...thank god my birth mom didnt have an abortion...its not selfish to put a baby up for adoption, believe me if we are talking about handling it emotionally...would either decision really be easier?? I would think knowing your child was placed with a family who cant have, but DESPERATELY want children would put a person more at ease than aborting it lol...hmmmm

Dawn

ehunney · 11-14-2006, 02:58 PM

Jess,Their is a reason why your feeling like you shouldn't have an abortion, listen to your gut. As human beings we sometimes ignore our own instinct and innerself even though we know we shouldn't. If you feel like you should keep your child, even if you put him or her up for adoption, then you should keep it. Do not allow your boyfriend to make a decison for you, because at the end of the day you will have to live with it. God and your family will help you through this.

GORJESS · 11-14-2006, 03:05 PM

It's been really hard 4 me 2 respond 2 the thread again because it's kind of embarrasing but the guy im pregnant by is not my bf...

red98vett · 11-14-2006, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GORJESS

It's been really hard 4 me 2 respond 2 the thread again because it's kind of embarrasing but the guy im pregnant by is not my bf...

Hon - whoever the dad is he deserves to know ....but in the end - it's YOUR BODY. Just remember that -

and as far as your parents throwing you out - you said your sister was 19 right ??? you're 17 ? there's a 2 year age diff but you NEED TO TELL Them IF you plan to keep the baby or go with adoption - don't wait too long.....this won't go away and you need to start making decisions.

11-14-2006, 02:22 PM	#32
Katys mom I love yorkie kisses Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 1,751	OK, this is very personal and I don't want to scare you either. I found myself very young and in your situation as well. I was receiving a lot of pressure to have an abortion. I just couldn't do it. I have a lot of faith in God. Sometimes we can not see down the road, but he can. I can not begin to tell you how grateful I am that I did not abort my beautiful daughter. You see, what I didn't know is, I had a problem from the IUD I was using. She would be the only child I would have. (I did not find this out until years later after trying to have another baby), If I had aborted her, I would not have had any children. Now, I realize that your situation is not the same, but I truly believe that God has a purpose for everything. He has the road map and is all knowing. Share your situation with your parents. Ask them for a private meeting, be prepared for them to be upset, they will be OK. Seek their guidance and wisdom. You will need to draw on their strength. Edited after I saw that you thought that they would kick you out. I agree talk to your sister. I will keep you in my prayers. Last edited by Katys mom; 11-14-2006 at 02:26 PM.

11-14-2006, 02:24 PM	#33
Tiggerwit Just me 'n my boys Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Murphy, TX Posts: 4,596	Maybe your parents regret the choice they made with your sister and wouldn't make that mistake with you. I know it's hard, but you need to do what's right for you. If your boyfriend is not supportive now, what's it going to be like in the future? I understand that your decision will affect him in the long run but if you don't believe in abortion then don't do it and don't let him talk you into it. There are other options. If you feel you aren't ready for this, then give this baby a chance with a loving family that will adopt him/her. Find an organization where you will be able to stay involved in the childs life. I am a mother of a 17 year old. Of course I want more for her, but things happen and you just deal with it. I would be disappointed, I won't lie to you, but what's done is done and my being angry isn't going to help or change anything. Hang in there. Is there someone you can talk to? Church, school counselor? __________________ "Be kinder than necessary, for everyone is fighting some kind of battle." Alphy 's Roxy

11-14-2006, 02:27 PM	#36
Dawgcrazee YT Addict Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Rockwell, NC Posts: 465	I was 17 I was 17 when I had my first child. It can be done. You need to confide in your parents. And like a couple others said. Stay in school. The Lord be with you and yours. Blessings, Teri __________________ Phipps' Pretty Pooches Rockwell, NC 28138

11-14-2006, 02:58 PM	#43
ehunney Princess Bella Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: virginia Posts: 2,186	Jess,Their is a reason why your feeling like you shouldn't have an abortion, listen to your gut. As human beings we sometimes ignore our own instinct and innerself even though we know we shouldn't. If you feel like you should keep your child, even if you put him or her up for adoption, then you should keep it. Do not allow your boyfriend to make a decison for you, because at the end of the day you will have to live with it. God and your family will help you through this. __________________ I miss you two more then words can express, but I still have hope that I'll find you and hold you again! Tucker and Teddy always say: "If I want it, it's mine and if I put it in my mouth, it's food."

11-14-2006, 02:36 PM	#38
Alliec1 Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Ohio Posts: 64	Adoption is a great thing, but can you handle that emotionally, as well? I must honestly say that if I were in your shoes, I would choose an abortion. I understand how you may feel about your unborn child, but you must remember yourself. I know it sounds selfish, but in this situation, you have every right to be selfish and do what is right for you. Your future matters to you, you are living, breathing, here right now..the fetus isn't. I'm sorry if this sounds a little harsh, but it's just my 2 cents. It reminds me of a situation that's often been talked about: If a pregant woman would get into, say, a car crash, and they could only save her or the baby, which would they choose? I say the mother; the baby has no real 'life' yet. The connection I'm making here is that it is your life that you will have to live, despite the decision you make.

11-14-2006, 02:48 PM	#41
Sugar's Mom BANNED! Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Kentucky Posts: 9,248	I am very grateful my biological mother wanted more for me than what she could give me so she gave me up. I have had a wonderful life because of it.

11-14-2006, 03:05 PM	#44
GORJESS Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Chicago, Illinois Posts: 829	It's been really hard 4 me 2 respond 2 the thread again because it's kind of embarrasing but the guy im pregnant by is not my bf...