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06-05-2006, 08:25 AM | #1 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Florida
Posts: 147
| I'm so angry! I'm sorry YT, I have some pent up steam that needs to be vented.. I am just so mad at my soon to be mother in law! I'll try to explain the best I can. She's never really liked me from the get go. In fact, she doesnt like any of her son's girlfriends. She hated me so much that she even kicked her son out of her house because he was dating me! One main reason why she hates me so much is because I come from a mediocre household and am not affluent. Eventually she had to give in and accept me since I've been with her son for over 3 years now. Anyway, I do my best to show her as much respect as I can. Whenever I'm at her house, I clean and wash dishes and take out the trash, just to prove to her that I am a fit girlfriend for her son. She makes very rude remarks sometimes and I always bite my tongue. My only wish and hope is for reconcilation between us, since afterall she is going to be my future mother in law. Yesterday, however, was the boiling point for me. Her "precious" chihuahua is so nasty to everyone. He will bite you if he does not know you. Actually he'll bite you even if he does know you (he's bit my fiance and I several times). And God forbid if I ever leave any thing on the ground because 5 minutes later, I'll find it drenched in his pee. I dread bringing TeeJay over to her house but I feel terrible leaving him at home by himself. So yesterday, I brought TeeJay over and ChuChu (her precious chihuahau) started picking a fight with him. TeeJay, still acts like a puppy and starts pouncing around and wagging his tail. He pounces on her precious chihuahua and he screams like banshee and goes crazy nipping at him! She immediately scoops ChuChu up and starts babying him and at the same time, she starts screaming at TeeJay calling him a bad dog. She almost goes over to hit him, until I scooped him up real quick and told her I would handle his punishment myself even though he did nothing wrong. She follows me, screaming that I am a terrible owner and that TeeJay is a terrible dog. She says that TeeJay is the culprit for ChuChu's bad behavior. Oh man! I wanted so bad to turn around and scream back at her but I ended up crying to my fiance and vowing never to return to her house with TeeJay. My fiance hates going over to her house too, but he does because he has 3 brothers and a sister that lives there whom he's all very close to. It's just so sad that she cannot accept me after all these years. My fiance and I havent even told her that we're engaged because we know she will not approve and she will make it her goal to break off the engagement like how she tried so hard to break us up when we first started dating. Anyway, I can go on and on about her and all the tribulations that I've gone through with this woman but I'd probably fill up 10 pages. Sorry guys for the long rant, but I really needed to vent! |
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06-05-2006, 08:29 AM | #2 |
I love my boys! Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Houston
Posts: 1,913
| I'm so sorry she's like that! It must really suck. But if you and your fiance can get through her you 2 are rock solid . Try not to let her get to you, she's probaby just being very veeery overprotective, and hopefully she'll give in soon. That little ChuChu sounds like a turd too lol.
__________________ -Megan, Tucker & Tripp "My little dogs- heartbeats at my feet" www.dropshots.com/megan_kat22 |
06-05-2006, 08:38 AM | #3 |
YT 6000 Club Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: CA
Posts: 6,588
| You should rent Monster In law and leave it at her house...I'm so sorry she's so nasty. I don't understand people like that. Your fiance needs to step up and stick up for you. He needs to put his foot down where his mother is concerned otherwise this will always be a battle for you. He needs to be doing this legwork with his mother not you
__________________ Mommy to Coco and Rocco |
06-05-2006, 08:41 AM | #4 |
Always In My Heart Donating Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: The Lone Star State
Posts: 3,393
| I know how you feel.. mymother in law could not stand me either.. since I was marrying her baby....but I told her bluntly you have 2 choices either accept me or risk him not wanting contact with you... well she tried to make our lives hell.. shoot she even had a betting tree to see how long we would actually stay married.... ha ha going on 4 years this 21st of june.... guess I won huh.... now she is older and well she accepts me because she realized I am not going anywhere..... good luck... |
06-05-2006, 08:54 AM | #5 | |
Luv my Angel, too! Donating Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: USA
Posts: 9,333
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__________________ Sissy & Angel | |
06-05-2006, 09:03 AM | #6 |
YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: North wilkesboro, NC
Posts: 2,785
| I'm so sorry that you are going through this. I agree you fiance needs to stand up to his mother now or it will continue.
__________________ Sheila, Mollie & Wyatt Ethan my pride and joy Mollie www.dogster.com/?176293 Wyatt www.dogster.com/?205723 |
06-05-2006, 09:11 AM | #7 |
Donating YT 30K Club Member | She sounds horibble! My now deceased Mother in law didn't like me either, and really don't know why I tok her spoiled rotten son who didn't work and got him to grow up and hold a job. Then when we had our dtr 20 years ago she sis a complete turn around I was such a wonderful wife and mother and how could I put up with her son!lol Well I always respected her and whe she died and my fatehr in law became ill I spent 15 months taking care of him on a daily basis unti his death, I was the one to go the hospital with him the last night and go to the hospital and handle everything when he died because my husband couldn't deal with it. I hope she was up there looking down saying wow was I wrong about her! Hopefully your mother in law will see you for the great person you are and if not it's her loss and treather with respect anyway so that you can respect yourself. You won't regret it.
__________________ Cali Pixie Roxie : RIP Nikki; RIP Maya;RIP my sweet Dixie girl 1/17/08 http://callipuppyscastle.bravehost.com/index.html |
06-05-2006, 09:32 AM | #8 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Florida
Posts: 147
| Oh I dont want to you guys to get the impression that my fiance DOESNT stick up for me. He actually does, very much so. In fact, that is the reason why she kicked him out of her house, because he stuck up for me. They've gotten into numerous arguments because of me and they've stopped talking for months because also because of me. My fiance and his mother's relationship has always been a rocky one. I told him there is no point in arguing with her because she is extremely stubborn and it's either her way or no way at all. I'm sorry that some of the info had been miscontrued. My fiance does his part in sticking up for me, but it does no good. Her mind is already set about how she feels about me. That is why I figured it'd be a good idea if I show her that I'm really not a bad person instead of having him tell her all the time. Actions do speak louder than words... just not in her case. |
06-05-2006, 09:36 AM | #9 |
Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member | Man...we have enough problems in our lives without dealing with a petty problem like that - IF she wants her son to be happy - then she needs to shut up. People like that think they run everything. I feel sorry for both you and your boyfriend/fiance - she may come around - but MAYBE he needs to just stay away for a while and see how she likes him NOT coming around. No one needs that. and I would leave your doggies at home next time - you can't win in her own house and she probably just has no clue as to how her dog acts. |
06-05-2006, 09:40 AM | #10 |
I love yorkie kisses Donating Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 1,751
| I would quit going to her house. If she wants a relationship with you and your husband (Grandchildren) make her come to your house on your terms. |
06-05-2006, 10:30 AM | #11 |
YT 6000 Club Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: CA
Posts: 6,588
| I would stop going to her house including your fiance, until she apologizes or is nice to you. I would tell my fiance that as long as she acts that way, that you won't be going to her home anymore.
__________________ Mommy to Coco and Rocco |
06-05-2006, 10:44 AM | #12 | |
Luvs Lulu Donating Member | Quote:
You can have a good relationship with him and avoid his mother. If I were you I tell him that I wasn't going over there. He is more than welcome to visit her because she is his mom but being as she doens't like you and you have tried you are done with it. I believe in giving respect where it's due and she definitely wouldn't get any from me.
__________________ Lulu will always be in my heart | |
06-05-2006, 11:09 AM | #13 |
No Longer a Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Florida
Posts: 147
| Thank you all for such great advice. I would love to never step foot in her house again, but I feel it is my duty to get along with because she will be apart of my family very soon. I was taught to treat your elders with respect but it's so hard to show her respect -- extremely hard. This is pretty personal, but I feel comfortable enough with everyone on this board to share. Last year, my fiance and I found out that we were expecting a baby! Oh what wonderful news it was for us since I was told by many doctors that it'd be near impossible for me to become pregnant. Unfortunately, about 3 months into the pregnancy, I had a miscarriage. My fiance at the time worked at a store that his mother owned. I needed to get to a hospital.. quick! However, his mother would not allow him to take me to the hospital. She told him that I could take myself, although I was in MAJOR pain and was bleeding alot. My fiance just walked out of her store and drove me to the nearest hospital. I think at that moment, she realized that her son chose me over her and she couldnt accept it. Since then, things have just gotten worse. Anyway, thank you all for listening. It really is a huge relief for me to finally let out how I feel. |
06-05-2006, 11:16 AM | #14 | |
YT 6000 Club Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: CA
Posts: 6,588
| Quote:
__________________ Mommy to Coco and Rocco | |
06-06-2006, 07:08 AM | #15 |
I love TBCG! Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: MD
Posts: 7,227
| I agree with the above saying that respect is earned. This seems to affect you more than it does her and it's not fair. Her nasty attitude is her problem, and I wouldn't make it yours. I wouldn't just not take Teejay over there I wouldn't go either. We have enough problems in our lives than to deal with nasty in laws. I have people in my family that I never see and don't care too. I would just stay away don't try to make her like you sounds like she is one of those people that doesn't even like herself.
__________________ Morgan Mommy toGeorgie boy & Isaiah RIP sweet Coco 10/12/99-8/1/12 Read About Georgie's Experience with Atlantoaxial Instability (AAI) Here! |
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