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Old 10-01-2011, 06:42 AM   #1
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Rose It's only been a week......

It’s been a week now since my little Jack has passed….. it feels so much longer. I’ve never had to make such a decision before for a pet. It is the most heartwreching decision anyone will have to make. The decision you must make is not whether its life will end, but how, and how much discomfort you are willing to allow it to endure. Not having any guilt in making this decision is not an option. No matter what decision is made some doubts and guilt will remain………

“That day” had come that I had to help my baby to the other side. I held my precious baby on my lap, cuddled up in his fluffy blanket, knowing what was about to happen. I felt like I was about to betray his trust in me….As I whispered to him how much I loved him, how he was such a strong brave boy and how he was my sweet baby and that I’ll see him again soon they injected him. I desperately wanted to just run out of there…just run, clutching him to my chest screaming, NO!.... But I knew at some point in the next few days I would be right back here facing the inevitable…. I cried as I felt his heart beat and then it stopped …..My baby is now gone…….


I’m finding myself missing him so much throughout the day. As I pass “his” vintage pink chair I expect to see him there, but all I see is emptiness, it’s heartbreaking …. I had to keep a foot stool in front of it because Jack was too little to get up there on his own. He would always sleep there, curled up in a little ball, feeling the outside air coming in through the door. This is also the chair where he would run to after he had a bath. He would jump up in it all excited and try to burry himself under his blanket. He would slip under one side and emerge from the other side of the blanket doing it over and over again while I tickled him……

The first time I swept the kitchen floor it didn’t go without notice that Jack wasn’t here to attack the broom as I tried to sweep. It always took many attempts to get the dirt in a pile; Jack would always skid out in it sending it in all directions as he tried to bite at the broom. I sure miss that…….His crate is still in the kitchen. Jake and J.J. knew not to go in it (most of the time). When they did try all Jack had to do was walk up to the door and give them a glare and they would immediately vacate the premises. It was always so funny because Jack was half their size, but he was boss and they knew it. It seems so strange only seeing two when there should be three……


The joy found in the companionship of a pet is a blessing not given to everyone and Jack surely did just that. You graced my life with your presence, thank you for every moment we shared. Until I can journey to where you now are, you are just one breath away. I hold you in my heart….Run free sweet baby.



P.S. Thank you Jo Ann for the encouragement......
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Old 10-01-2011, 07:52 AM   #2
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It seems at times the pain is unbearable, but hopefully one day you will be able to remember the good times. You made the ultimate sacrifice of knowing when he had had enough and made the difficult decision. No matter how right it was it still never feels right. You did not betray Jack. Hugs
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Old 10-01-2011, 07:54 AM   #3
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I know how hard this is and the home is so different without them...it's never a easy decision but we have to come to peace with it. I have lost two very loved yorkies now and miss them dearly. One way to young. They forever hold a special place in our hearts. Sending lots of hugs.
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Old 10-01-2011, 08:15 AM   #4
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I understand your pain. Hopefully, you will feel better as time goes on. It will be 14 weeks tomorrow that I lost my Sammy. While I'm having more good days, I still cry and have trouble talking about him without crying. I know what you mean about sweeping without "our helpers" being there to attack the broom. It seems so odd to me now to be able to sweep and vacuum without Sammy barking and chasing the broom or vacuum. Sending hugs and good thoughts to you. We have wonderful memories of our precious pups.
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Old 10-01-2011, 11:00 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sammy Mommy View Post
I understand your pain. Hopefully, you will feel better as time goes on. It will be 14 weeks tomorrow that I lost my Sammy. While I'm having more good days, I still cry and have trouble talking about him without crying. I know what you mean about sweeping without "our helpers" being there to attack the broom. It seems so odd to me now to be able to sweep and vacuum without Sammy barking and chasing the broom or vacuum. Sending hugs and good thoughts to you. We have wonderful memories of our precious pups.
I'm so sorry you lost your little one at such a tender age. I'm also know what you mean about not being able to talk about them. I'm fine as long as no one asks about him, but if they do, the tears start to flow again....


About a month ago I knew this day was nearing so I cut a small lock of his hair. I have such mixed feeling when I hold that lock of hair and smell it.....I lay in bed at night talking to him just begging for him to give me a sign that he's alright. Just maybe one day I'll get that sign.......
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Old 10-01-2011, 03:08 PM   #6
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reading your post has brought tears... i am truly sorry for you heartbreaking loss of your baby. it has been a little over a year since i lost my sweet little nika and it is still so difficult without her. i still want to see her sitting on the arm of the couch when i come home doing her little happy dance so excited to see me and give me yorkie kisses all over my face. we will always have those precious memories of them forever and they will never go away. the love we have stays in our hearts forever so they are still with us in that way. sending you a hug, you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
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Old 10-01-2011, 05:27 PM   #7
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Bless you! I will keep you in my prayers hon!
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Old 10-02-2011, 05:54 AM   #8
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I am in tears reading this and reminds me on the day I had to put our dear Keally down because of a brain tumor. I would wake up every night and could not go back to sleep. Please think of all the wonderful days and special moments you had. They say time heals and it will very slowly. Remember you were a great mom and take a day at a time. It is hard to do but it will get better . You will never forget please take care of. Sending prayers and hug to you. Also a lick from my little Kinder. Susan
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Old 10-02-2011, 07:46 AM   #9
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I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious Jack. I know it must have been a very hard decision and my heart aches for you. As I read your story, I am sitting here in tears because I can feel the pain as you tell your story.

May your little Jack rest in peace, and I am praying that you will find comfort in all the happy times you had with him, knowing he's now at peace and knowing you did everything you could possibly do for him.

May he rest in the arms of Jesus' and play with all his little friends at the Rainbow Bridge.
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Old 10-04-2011, 06:48 AM   #10
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Thank you all for the kind words.......

Over the years I've seen many members on this forum posting about their pets serious illnesses or trying to cope with an unexpected loss. As sad as it was for these owners struggling to cope with their pain and fears some how I had always felt this could never happen to me and my babies. Somehow, I felt immune from such terrible things. Those things could never happen to us......And then it did.......

In reality, our pets are gifts given to us for a very short time. They bring us so much joy and provide us with such loving companionship and in return they ask for nothing. We would do anything in your power to protect and care for them. We never imagine a life without them in it. But, at some point we all will have to face some horrific decisions that we never thought we would.....to end our pets suffering......

We all must try to remember that not everything is in our control. We might like to think it is, we hope that it is, but there are times it simply isn't. It takes courage to assume this last duty and it is our last responsibility to a pet which has given us love and companionship. A far more dangerous form of selfishness is to prolong a pet's suffering simply to postpone your own. I just hope that when we all are faced with these decisions we have the strength, wisdom and selflessness to make the right choice for them and not for ourselves.....

To everyone who has lost a loved one far too soon, I wish you peace and happy thoughts when you remember your babies.....

For the moms who's babies are still here with them warming your laps.....Give all your babies plenty of belly rubs and kisses....
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Old 10-04-2011, 10:25 AM   #11
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Oh my,, im totally is tears right now.. Im so so sorry for your loss and for everyone who has lost a little precious baby.. My god bless you.
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Old 10-05-2011, 10:31 AM   #12
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Your words express what so many of us have gone through and feel during those times when we must make that heart wrenching decision. It will be one year in 4 days since I helped my second furbaby to the bridge and every time someone brings her up, tears still well in my eyes. It is never easy, but somehow comforting to know they are no longer in pain and watching over us. I am so very sorry for your loss, I wish I could send you a virtual hug, as I know so well those feelings you are struggling with right now. Rest in Peace sweet baby Jack
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Old 10-05-2011, 07:14 PM   #13
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Bless your heart. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. May your sweet baby rest in peace and have lots of fun at the bridge with my babies.
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