All The Lost Babies

[Lovetodream88]

Originally Posted by nanajoy

You are such a help to so many on this site, I am sorry to hear that you have these challenges. My husband and I took our little Beau to the emergency vet this Saturday night because he had coughing fits. He is almost 12, and we were concerned that his cough was "wetter" than his dry coughs to clear his throat after sleeping. We didn't want to take a chance of waiting until Monday morning, even though he showed no signs of being ill. He has occasional, mild CT, and we did not want to risk any chance of pneumonia. With older pets every "hiccup" seems to spur worry!

The vet gave him a solid exam, and everything (heart, breathing, etc.) was solid. He has bad LP problems, and is barely 5 pounds, but he came through with flying colors. The vet did give him an antibiotic since his trachea was irritated, and she did state that because of his age and CT she thought it was safest. Fast forward two days, and he was running around playing fetch!

I am older and retired, and have faced end-of-life issues with many of our pets. I know that it is easier said than done, but I make a conscious effort to recognize that my time with this wonderful little guy is growing less, and I make every possible effort to enjoy him while he is with us. He sleeps for much of the day, but he often sleeps curled up against me on the couch. When he does want to play, we focus on him (knowing that he will tire within a small time and that we can go back to whatever...)

May you find love and happiness each day with your beloved Callie! Take the time to build the memories which will last for a lifetime, and give her a kiss from Beau!

Thanks she was just at the vet today her allergies are terrible right now.

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by mrssabes

Saw this from a vet on Facebook the other day and it made me cry. (see attachment)

Amen to that post. And take your baby's own bed to the vet for that last trip so they can relax as best possible in their own familiar bed at the vets until the time comes to say that final goodbye. Then, if you can contain your grief, I'd want to be holding my baby in my arms for the injection but what would I do if suddenly I just lose it and start bawling wildly - upsetting my baby at his very last moments on earth? I sure wouldn't want to ever do that - have his last moments alive with me sharing in my in hysterical crying, deep distress when it should all be about him breathing his last in peace. I'm so conflicted about upsetting my baby during his passing. I don't think I could keep it together in the least! I'll be a complete and utter sobbing wreck.

[matese]

Originally Posted by yorkietalkjilly

Amen to that post. And take your baby's own bed to the vet for that last trip so they can relax as best possible in their own familiar bed at the vets until the time comes to say that final goodbye. Then, if you can contain your grief, I'd want to be holding my baby in my arms for the injection but what would I do if suddenly I just lose it and start bawling wildly - upsetting my baby at his very last moments on earth? I sure wouldn't want to ever do that - have his last moments alive with me sharing in my in hysterical crying, deep distress when it should all be about him breathing his last in peace. I'm so conflicted about upsetting my baby during his passing. I don't think I could keep it together in the least! I'll be a complete and utter sobbing wreck.

You would surprise yourself at how controlled you would be for the sake of your baby in his final moments. I watched that video, it reminded me of myself the day I received the call to come and say my last good byes, I had to put Matese down. Matese was at the vets for 7 days because at the age of 17 yo one day she wouldn't eat. For 2 days I made things she loved, like boiled boneless chic cutlets, she ate maybe a teaspoon, she was not eating and had diarrhea. Morning of day 3 I took her in on an emergency visit, they kept her, she was on IV the entire time she was there. Every morning at 11AM the tech would call me with a report of how she was doing,always telling me she was improving. Visiting time was 1 to 4PM, I was there at 1PM, they would take the IV out, I would bring her to the car for pvt. one on one cuddling time where I would cry into her neck to please get better and come home, then I realized this crying of mine was not good to do, so I held back my tears and fears on my visits. Day 3 at the vet when I went to visit her I asked the tech will she be coming the tech told me yes, that lifted my spirit but she was looking really bad, she had lost a lot of weight, she was a big girl at 17 pounds, now looking skinny, day 5 when the tech called she said Matese would be coming home the next day, when I went to visit her she looked horrible, as always we went to the car, she would just lay there in my arms. Day 6 tech calls, said they were going to hold her one more day, she was eating on her own, not a lot but was eating, still had diarrhea and reason they wanted to keep her another day. Day 7 at the vet, I had to go out, 10AM the tech call, it is one hour before the usual call, I get excited thinking they are calling for me to pick her up, instead the call was to come in and say my last good byes, I had to put her down, I was screaming no, you have the wrong dog , she's coming home, I was in town on the sidewalk, hysterical, screaming, saying I was getting positive reports all week, you have the wrong dog, Matese is coming home, the tech is telling me I am in denial, I sit on the curb screaming into the phone I can't do this, just like that poor poor lady in the video, I couldn't believe what I was hearing, I tell the tech shes not in pain, just stop the diarrhea I'll take her home and get her to eat, the tech said her organs were breaking down she is in pain, I have to come in and put her down, all I can do is scream saying I can't do this, and I couldn't do it. ppl were coming over to me asking me if I was ok, all I could say was I have to put my dog down, I can't do it, I couldn't believe one day she was coming home, the next day I am being told come and say my good byes. I knew I could not get in my car and drive to the vet to kill my dog. I called a friend of mine that loved my Matese dearly, I was screaming on the phone I can't do this, then told him of the call, I told him I cannot get in my car and drive to the vet, I cannot go to kill my dog. He told me to wait where he was he would come get me and take me to the vet. Someone must have called the police, I was hysterical in disbelief, screaming I can't do this, the officer asked me what was wrong, he was trying to get me to stand up, I couldn't, I told him about the call, told him I can't do this, he said he would take me to the vet and stay with me, I told him someone was coming for me. Such a nice understanding officer, he stayed with me 45 minutes until my friend came. On the drive to the vet I am telling my friend I have to pull myself together for the sake of Matese, she is dieing, she is scared, I have to be her strength, I can't let her feel my emotions, she has to be calm in her last moments, all the time asking, how am I going to do this. When I get to the vet I am dazed they tell me to take her outside and spend as much time with her as I need, I can't sit in my friends car, the smell would not be familiar to her so we stand outside taking turns talking to her, she loved my friend but showed no sign of knowing him, I knew it was time. I don't know where the strength came from for me to remain calm, to hold her tight against my heart so she could feel my love, to whisper in her ear she was a good girl and kiss her cheek while the tech injected her and ended her life. She passed peacefully, she looked like she was sleeping, I laid her on the exam table calling her name, trying to wake her up, the tech said she was gone. Then I broke down again. I tell this story to let you know, as much pain as we may be in, for the sake of our babies last moments we want them to pass in peace without fear, and in the arms of the person that they loved the most.

Matese was not the first baby I had to put down, there were several before her and they were not easy. Matese was with me for 17 years, and tech promises she was coming home is why I think I went into such a state of shock.

It was very hard to watch that video, I know the pain that lady was in, I was there too, but managed to stay calm for the last moments of my baby's life.

[sandy simpson]

Having to say goodbye to a faithful fur friend is heartbreaking. Through all my tears I know my dogs were a gift to me from their Creator. When their 11th hour comes it's time for me to hand them back to the Lord. There is a place for them to go and be happy. I must let go. Love doesnt end with death. It lives on in our hearts. Life is short and i will see my precious dog someday.

[yorkietalkjilly]

Originally Posted by matese

You would surprise yourself at how controlled you would be for the sake of your baby in his final moments. I watched that video, it reminded me of myself the day I received the call to come and say my last good byes, I had to put Matese down. Matese was at the vets for 7 days because at the age of 17 yo one day she wouldn't eat. For 2 days I made things she loved, like boiled boneless chic cutlets, she ate maybe a teaspoon, she was not eating and had diarrhea. Morning of day 3 I took her in on an emergency visit, they kept her, she was on IV the entire time she was there. Every morning at 11AM the tech would call me with a report of how she was doing,always telling me she was improving. Visiting time was 1 to 4PM, I was there at 1PM, they would take the IV out, I would bring her to the car for pvt. one on one cuddling time where I would cry into her neck to please get better and come home, then I realized this crying of mine was not good to do, so I held back my tears and fears on my visits. Day 3 at the vet when I went to visit her I asked the tech will she be coming the tech told me yes, that lifted my spirit but she was looking really bad, she had lost a lot of weight, she was a big girl at 17 pounds, now looking skinny, day 5 when the tech called she said Matese would be coming home the next day, when I went to visit her she looked horrible, as always we went to the car, she would just lay there in my arms. Day 6 tech calls, said they were going to hold her one more day, she was eating on her own, not a lot but was eating, still had diarrhea and reason they wanted to keep her another day. Day 7 at the vet, I had to go out, 10AM the tech call, it is one hour before the usual call, I get excited thinking they are calling for me to pick her up, instead the call was to come in and say my last good byes, I had to put her down, I was screaming no, you have the wrong dog , she's coming home, I was in town on the sidewalk, hysterical, screaming, saying I was getting positive reports all week, you have the wrong dog, Matese is coming home, the tech is telling me I am in denial, I sit on the curb screaming into the phone I can't do this, just like that poor poor lady in the video, I couldn't believe what I was hearing, I tell the tech shes not in pain, just stop the diarrhea I'll take her home and get her to eat, the tech said her organs were breaking down she is in pain, I have to come in and put her down, all I can do is scream saying I can't do this, and I couldn't do it. ppl were coming over to me asking me if I was ok, all I could say was I have to put my dog down, I can't do it, I couldn't believe one day she was coming home, the next day I am being told come and say my good byes. I knew I could not get in my car and drive to the vet to kill my dog. I called a friend of mine that loved my Matese dearly, I was screaming on the phone I can't do this, then told him of the call, I told him I cannot get in my car and drive to the vet, I cannot go to kill my dog. He told me to wait where he was he would come get me and take me to the vet. Someone must have called the police, I was hysterical in disbelief, screaming I can't do this, the officer asked me what was wrong, he was trying to get me to stand up, I couldn't, I told him about the call, told him I can't do this, he said he would take me to the vet and stay with me, I told him someone was coming for me. Such a nice understanding officer, he stayed with me 45 minutes until my friend came. On the drive to the vet I am telling my friend I have to pull myself together for the sake of Matese, she is dieing, she is scared, I have to be her strength, I can't let her feel my emotions, she has to be calm in her last moments, all the time asking, how am I going to do this. When I get to the vet I am dazed they tell me to take her outside and spend as much time with her as I need, I can't sit in my friends car, the smell would not be familiar to her so we stand outside taking turns talking to her, she loved my friend but showed no sign of knowing him, I knew it was time. I don't know where the strength came from for me to remain calm, to hold her tight against my heart so she could feel my love, to whisper in her ear she was a good girl and kiss her cheek while the tech injected her and ended her life. She passed peacefully, she looked like she was sleeping, I laid her on the exam table calling her name, trying to wake her up, the tech said she was gone. Then I broke down again. I tell this story to let you know, as much pain as we may be in, for the sake of our babies last moments we want them to pass in peace without fear, and in the arms of the person that they loved the most.

Matese was not the first baby I had to put down, there were several before her and they were not easy. Matese was with me for 17 years, and tech promises she was coming home is why I think I went into such a state of shock.

It was very hard to watch that video, I know the pain that lady was in, I was there too, but managed to stay calm for the last moments of my baby's life.

I never cry except about dogs, soldiers, patriotism and miracles. Never.
When my dad died, I couldn't cry for 3 days, had to be strong for my mom.
He was my best buddy in the world and I couldn't cry for all that time, couldn't release my pain it was so deep. Somehow I became a non-crier, had to always stay strong and learned an overly- composed behavior, putting my own hurt in a compartment or something. EXCEPT about those 4 things above and in these areas, I'm a complete, instant emotional mess. Dogs are maybe the hardest. They have a straight line to my tear ducts.

This story is so painful and bittersweet to read about your losing Matese that way and about those last two hours or so. Your words really put me in those moments. I cried. What a horrible time that was. Your poor, sweet baby! I'm SO proud you pulled it together for your little one! But what if I, who cries so easily when I just think about those awful moments or learn about other's losing their dogs, SHOULD totally lose it and my poor, sweet little baby's last moments on earth are totally stressed by my stupid reactions? What if I break down in the 'goodbye room' like you did before you got to the vets? How can I roll the dice with my own sweet baby when I know how totally weak I am about dogs' dying moments?

[FreyasDaddy]

Originally Posted by matese

You would surprise yourself at how controlled you would be for the sake of your baby in his final moments. I watched that video, it reminded me of myself the day I received the call to come and say my last good byes, I had to put Matese down. Matese was at the vets for 7 days because at the age of 17 yo one day she wouldn't eat. For 2 days I made things she loved, like boiled boneless chic cutlets, she ate maybe a teaspoon, she was not eating and had diarrhea. Morning of day 3 I took her in on an emergency visit, they kept her, she was on IV the entire time she was there. Every morning at 11AM the tech would call me with a report of how she was doing,always telling me she was improving. Visiting time was 1 to 4PM, I was there at 1PM, they would take the IV out, I would bring her to the car for pvt. one on one cuddling time where I would cry into her neck to please get better and come home, then I realized this crying of mine was not good to do, so I held back my tears and fears on my visits. Day 3 at the vet when I went to visit her I asked the tech will she be coming the tech told me yes, that lifted my spirit but she was looking really bad, she had lost a lot of weight, she was a big girl at 17 pounds, now looking skinny, day 5 when the tech called she said Matese would be coming home the next day, when I went to visit her she looked horrible, as always we went to the car, she would just lay there in my arms. Day 6 tech calls, said they were going to hold her one more day, she was eating on her own, not a lot but was eating, still had diarrhea and reason they wanted to keep her another day. Day 7 at the vet, I had to go out, 10AM the tech call, it is one hour before the usual call, I get excited thinking they are calling for me to pick her up, instead the call was to come in and say my last good byes, I had to put her down, I was screaming no, you have the wrong dog , she's coming home, I was in town on the sidewalk, hysterical, screaming, saying I was getting positive reports all week, you have the wrong dog, Matese is coming home, the tech is telling me I am in denial, I sit on the curb screaming into the phone I can't do this, just like that poor poor lady in the video, I couldn't believe what I was hearing, I tell the tech shes not in pain, just stop the diarrhea I'll take her home and get her to eat, the tech said her organs were breaking down she is in pain, I have to come in and put her down, all I can do is scream saying I can't do this, and I couldn't do it. ppl were coming over to me asking me if I was ok, all I could say was I have to put my dog down, I can't do it, I couldn't believe one day she was coming home, the next day I am being told come and say my good byes. I knew I could not get in my car and drive to the vet to kill my dog. I called a friend of mine that loved my Matese dearly, I was screaming on the phone I can't do this, then told him of the call, I told him I cannot get in my car and drive to the vet, I cannot go to kill my dog. He told me to wait where he was he would come get me and take me to the vet. Someone must have called the police, I was hysterical in disbelief, screaming I can't do this, the officer asked me what was wrong, he was trying to get me to stand up, I couldn't, I told him about the call, told him I can't do this, he said he would take me to the vet and stay with me, I told him someone was coming for me. Such a nice understanding officer, he stayed with me 45 minutes until my friend came. On the drive to the vet I am telling my friend I have to pull myself together for the sake of Matese, she is dieing, she is scared, I have to be her strength, I can't let her feel my emotions, she has to be calm in her last moments, all the time asking, how am I going to do this. When I get to the vet I am dazed they tell me to take her outside and spend as much time with her as I need, I can't sit in my friends car, the smell would not be familiar to her so we stand outside taking turns talking to her, she loved my friend but showed no sign of knowing him, I knew it was time. I don't know where the strength came from for me to remain calm, to hold her tight against my heart so she could feel my love, to whisper in her ear she was a good girl and kiss her cheek while the tech injected her and ended her life. She passed peacefully, she looked like she was sleeping, I laid her on the exam table calling her name, trying to wake her up, the tech said she was gone. Then I broke down again. I tell this story to let you know, as much pain as we may be in, for the sake of our babies last moments we want them to pass in peace without fear, and in the arms of the person that they loved the most.

Matese was not the first baby I had to put down, there were several before her and they were not easy. Matese was with me for 17 years, and tech promises she was coming home is why I think I went into such a state of shock.

It was very hard to watch that video, I know the pain that lady was in, I was there too, but managed to stay calm for the last moments of my baby's life.

As much as it will tear me up, when the time comes I can't abandon my wee baby. For now, I focus on the love.

[nanajoy]

As I said earlier, even for those with older dogs, the best we can do is to love them each and every day that they are here with us. Build a lifetime of sweet memories which will forever be a part of your history. We never forget our little ones that have passed, so while they are here, celebrate every moment their lives! Give them the love that they give they give us so freely, and when the time comes you will find the strength to let them leave...in the meantime, do not waste a moment when you might be throwing a ball, or giving a tummy rub worrying about the future.

[FreyasDaddy]

Originally Posted by nanajoy

As I said earlier, even for those with older dogs, the best we can do is to love them each and every day that they are here with us. Build a lifetime of sweet memories which will forever be a part of your history. We never forget our little ones that have passed, so while they are here, celebrate every moment their lives! Give them the love that they give they give us so freely, and when the time comes you will find the strength to let them leave...in the meantime, do not waste a moment when you might be throwing a ball, or giving a tummy rub worrying about the future.

I can only give a tummy rub with two fingers. THAT'S how tiny wee Freya is! Lol.