Everyone: can we TURN UP the COMPASSION here?

[lillymae]

Originally Posted by CJxDanielle

Seems like that isn't very positive, is it?

Sooner people decide to move on the better. If you keep letting drama from "faceless" internet people whom you may never meet get in the way of enjoying a forum created for the dogs, not the people...
. . .well then shame on you, right?

Exactly

[manolos mom]

Originally Posted by lillymae

You see, this is my point. Still talking about people that aren't even here. Move on, Let it GO !!!

She did nothing wrong except to praise a member who was loved on YT and is no longer a member. Please go back a read her statement again.

[manolos mom]

Originally Posted by Lou

I have to agree with Chachi too!
Ya'll remember a member we used to have name Crystal's Mom? she was the sweetest thing but eventually stopped posting because the drama was getting to her. After all it is about the dogs not the people.

You are very right Lou, its all about the dogs.

[red98vett]

Originally Posted by Ringo1

I agree that we need to let the people that have left - go. Forget about them and concentrate on our own forum. That forum that is supposed to be so 'positive' really is not. So . . let's just do what we do best - help the dogs by helping their owners. And, yes, we can all take a look at our posting style - myself included.

YT is so great about helping others - a helping hand is always ready and willing even if the tone is not always what one would like. Even if one gets bashed in the breeder forum - they still hand out their phone numbers for someone really in need.

And for all the drama complaints, those threads are the ones that get the most response! I see it on all internet forums . . not just YT.

Sometimes they do get old and sometimes, they are just more interesting. Perhaps there is a happy medium we can reach.

I still love YT!

you nailed it - I've been here for years too but just not so much these days due to liife - but it's true - those threads do get the most views - it's human nature to look. I know lots of people get upset but in a way those same people are the ones reading - I do - I admit it (but have no idea what's been going on lately either)

The upside is sometimes they are informative IF you can get past the personalities bantering and I too have seen people stepping up to help no matter what was said on the public site

I imagine there are far more private messages helping others also

no internet site will be drama free - I remember a doll site someone spoke about ages ago - now we're talking about a DOLL site - I remember being told it was one of the most vicious places to post - I still never understood that one - dolls don't get sick, don't get neglected or abused and you don't breed them ....yet people found stuff to argue about ?

[BamaFan121s]

Originally Posted by lillymae

You see, this is my point. Still talking about people that aren't even here. Move on, Let it GO !!!

Seems like that suggestion is being made a whole lot around here lately, but not alot of people actually acting on it and following their own advice. Seems like one of those cases of 'practice what you preach.'

[jmdt]

You know some people argue just for the sake of arguing.

Originally Posted by red98vett

you nailed it - I've been here for years too but just not so much these days due to liife - but it's true - those threads do get the most views - it's human nature to look. I know lots of people get upset but in a way those same people are the ones reading - I do - I admit it (but have no idea what's been going on lately either)

The upside is sometimes they are informative IF you can get past the personalities bantering and I too have seen people stepping up to help no matter what was said on the public site

I imagine there are far more private messages helping others also

no internet site will be drama free - I remember a doll site someone spoke about ages ago - now we're talking about a DOLL site - I remember being told it was one of the most vicious places to post - I still never understood that one - dolls don't get sick, don't get neglected or abused and you don't breed them ....yet people found stuff to argue about ?

[Nancy1999]

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom

Don't sweat the small stuff .

One evening an old Cherokee Indian told his grandson about a battle that was going on inside himself.

He said, "My boy, the fight is between two wolves."
That certainly got the boy's attention.

"One is evil," the old man continued. "Anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego."

"What of the other, grandfather?" the boy asked.

"The other is good," he said. "Joy, Peace, Love, Hope, Serenity, Humility, Kindness, Benevolence, Empathy, Generosity, Truth, Compassion and Faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Do we all have such wolves fighting inside us, grandfather?"

"Yes," the wise old man said.

"Then, which wolf wins the fight?"The old Cherokee simply replied,

"The one you feed."

[Ute White]

Could one of the reasons of all this drama be that most of us members are women?
Most of my co-workers are women, there is always drama going on. "She said this and she said that, and do you know what she did now..?" I rather work with 20 men instead of 5 women...lol.
I'm only human, I love a good gossip but if it comes to attacking and back stabbing I'm out of there.
Another reason is, as said above, we are on an internet forum, most of us don't know the others by face and it's so much easier to talk like this incognito.
Hopefully I haven't offended anyone.

[YorkieMother]

Originally Posted by hartygirl

There is an ignore button, it prevents you from seeing what the "ignored" person has posted. You can still see it if someone quotes them though.

I don't use it anymore, I grew up and just don't take things personally anymore.

Yes growing up helps as long as the other person coming after you learns to grow up as well, which in one case never did until she got the boot. So ignore is a great thing until they do.

JL

[Nancy1999]

Originally Posted by Ute White

Could one of the reasons of all this drama be that most of us members are women?
Most of my co-workers are women, there is always drama going on. "She said this and she said that, and do you know what she did now..?" I rather work with 20 men instead of 5 women...lol.
I'm only human, I love a good gossip but if it comes to attacking and back stabbing I'm out of there.
Another reason is, as said above, we are on an internet forum, most of us don't know the others by face and it's so much easier to talk like this incognito.
Hopefully I haven't offended anyone.

So true, and I've often found the ones who say that they "hate the drama" are the ones causing most of it.

[Wylie's Mom]

Originally Posted by Ute White

Could one of the reasons of all this drama be that most of us members are women?
Most of my co-workers are women, there is always drama going on. "She said this and she said that, and do you know what she did now..?" I rather work with 20 men instead of 5 women...lol. I'm only human, I love a good gossip but if it comes to attacking and back stabbing I'm out of there. Another reason is, as said above, we are on an internet forum, most of us don't know the others by face and it's so much easier to talk like this incognito.
Hopefully I haven't offended anyone.

Nothing against my own gender , but I agree with this. I don't see or experience the level or type of drama with men that I see with women. In addition, there are some women (not all !) who go to a level of viciousness that I don't really see in men at all. Those women sometimes reveal themselves right away -or- it happens over time. When it happens over time, after a relationship has already developed - that's when the viciousness is not just ugly in and of itself, but it also causes sadness, in my opinion, because of the breach of friendship and trust.

There is a true line between a little gossip and real, INTENTIONAL viciousness. The difference is very easy to see. Whether or not people want to see it, *shrugs*, well that's a whole other topic .

[hartygirl]

It is shocking to see just how vicious people can be Ann, I agree totally, especially when you are totally blindsided by it coming from a trusted friend.

But it just makes me cherish the good people in my life all the more and cements the fact that my dogs are waaaayyy cooler than the weirdos out there!

To believe in your choice you don't need to prove that other people's choices are wrong.
Paulo Coelho (LOVE HIM)

[Wylie's Mom]

Originally Posted by hartygirl

It is shocking to see just how vicious people can be Ann, I agree totally, especially when you are totally blindsided by it coming from a trusted friend.

But it just makes me cherish the good people in my life all the more and cements the fact that my dogs are waaaayyy cooler than the weirdos out there!

To believe in your choice you don't need to prove that other people's choices are wrong. Paulo Coelho (LOVE HIM)

I love him too! I usually read The Alchemist about once every year or so. I have given that book as a gift to so many people. If you like other books of his, let me know. Great quote .

[Maximo]

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom

Nothing against my own gender , but I agree with this. I don't see or experience the level or type of drama with men that I see with women. In addition, there are some women (not all !) who go to a level of viciousness that I don't really see in men at all. Those women sometimes reveal themselves right away -or- it happens over time. When it happens over time, after a relationship has already developed - that's when the viciousness is not just ugly in and of itself, but it also causes sadness, in my opinion, because of the breach of friendship and trust.

There is a true line between a little gossip and real, INTENTIONAL viciousness. The difference is very easy to see. Whether or not people want to see it, *shrugs*, well that's a whole other topic .

That's because men are like dogs: they live in the moment and they are easily distracted by yummy treats.

[chachi]

Originally Posted by Ute White

Could one of the reasons of all this drama be that most of us members are women?
Most of my co-workers are women, there is always drama going on. "She said this and she said that, and do you know what she did now..?" I rather work with 20 men instead of 5 women...lol.
I'm only human, I love a good gossip but if it comes to attacking and back stabbing I'm out of there.
Another reason is, as said above, we are on an internet forum, most of us don't know the others by face and it's so much easier to talk like this incognito.
Hopefully I haven't offended anyone.

It is definitely because this forum is all women. Im with you a little idle gossip I dont mind and have participated in. I dont like vindictiveness or back stabbing.
I do get concerned though when it reaches a level that long time members leave. I tend to think maybe they are seeing something I am just not seeing. I dont know maybe its because Ive been on here for several years I just get attached to the long time members even the ones I dont agree with. There are alot of personalites and opinions and we need to speak our mind and be gvood stewards of animals but we also have to find a happy medium for everyone I didnt mean to get so sappy but this is really how Ive been feeling lately