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09-03-2008, 08:18 AM | #1 |
YT 2000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada
Posts: 2,583
| I'm so sad I have so much in my mind lately and I need some unbiased opinion. What would you do if you find that after you have been married for 2.5 years, your husband treat you differently? Differently as in he no longer cares for you as much as when you got married and you feel like a stranger to him sometimes? I feel very dissapointed and I feel that I am starting to resent him and I feel very lost...I have given up my career, travel very far from my family into a totally new society to be with him whom I thought will love me for the rest of my life but I am starting to feel I am not important to him anymore. I have a feeling, an instinct he no longer cares for me, no longer loves me eventhough he said he does. I am with my family 20,000 miles away for the past 2 months and he doesn't seem to really care. He said he is too busy with his job to know or care for me like before but I feel he doesn't care and I suspect he is seeing someone else but I have no way to proof. Just a strong instinct. I am going to see him again soon in a week's time and I am feeling so lost If we were to separate, I only wish I can bring my Yorkie with me back to where I come from as I cannot live without my little one. I have no idea how to do that, to bring him travelling so far and I wish to bring him in to cabin with me if it happens. Sometimes I wonder if it is best option to rehome him if I leave..it would hurt so much but if that is the best for him, I would do it. I don't really know what is my goal of typing this in forum..I guess I am just rambling and seeking for some opinions. What have I done to deserve this? I feel that I have dig a hole, jumped into it and is trapped. Please pray for me...if what I suspect is true, I may have a lot to deal with in the coming months...
__________________ http://www.dogster.com/pet_page.php?j=t&i=410379 "No matter how little money and how few possesions you own, having a dog makes you rich." |
Welcome Guest! | |
09-03-2008, 08:29 AM | #2 |
Donating YT 14K Club Member | I am so sorry that you are going through this. Many marriages, mine included, change over time. What was once hot and passionate turns into comfort. Once it was lingerie and now it's flannel PJs (though I love the flannels). I think that in all marriages, one or the other feel neglected at some point and I believe that in all marriages, people feel just as you are right now. I feel that you need to have a heart to heart with him. Maybe he's feeling exactly as you do right now. You have traveled far from your family and your family is your support system. You may feel alone (I've been in your shoes...I moved to be closer to DH's family and left mine behind). Have the two of you considered counseling? Hugs to you.
__________________ As always...JMO (Just My Opinion) Kimberley |
09-03-2008, 12:41 PM | #3 |
My Four Sweet Babies Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: South Jersey near Philadelphia
Posts: 5,452
| I have nothing better to say than Kimberley - I just want to wish you the best of luck. I hope everything works out for you.
__________________ I LOVE MY BABIES |
09-03-2008, 03:37 PM | #4 |
Donating YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: ~*~YorkieWorld~*~
Posts: 8,428
| So sorry you feel that way I think that aren't many man outhere who can understand how hard is to leave the family behind, is so hard I agree with what Kim has said heart to heart communication is the key, one thing I have learn that sometimes we expect the other partner to make us happy or to fulfil that hole or emptiness in our heart and soul and they seriously can't that is the plain true. I will pray for you today |
09-03-2008, 03:46 PM | #5 |
Yorkie Kisses are the Best! Donating Member | Potter - I'm so sorry you're going thru so much - I remember when you talked about leaving your family behind ...this is such a short time to be already having marriage issues...I'm so sorry. I hope he's just busy and concentrating on his career and that things look up for you. sending a big hug..... |
09-03-2008, 04:21 PM | #6 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Chinquapin NC
Posts: 654
| First of all, snap out of it!! You have done nothing to provoke the situation. Yet, is not good to be apart from the one you love. I advice, you call him from time to time. Make it sweet, short, and pleasant. I would not ask him if he still loves you. I would not ask him if he is seeing another woman. By asking, you would be putting things in his head, if he is not. Tell him how good you are doing, the people you meet, and about your work out at the gym. You dont know for sure if he has someone else, so why wasting your precious energy thinking about it? Dont sulk! go out with your girlfriends. If you dont have any, join a club, and get some friends to go out to the mall, the movies, a bookstore. Read the girl code, by Diane far. The book is meant for single women. It's a very funny way of looking at relationships between men and women. Another thing, you are not alone, a lot of us go thru that in one way or another. I am almost on the same boat, but my husband always calls me and tells me how much he loves me. It's really hard being apart, and very easy to doubt in that situation. Be happy, have fun, Remember men are like buses
__________________ Last edited by alishasmom; 09-03-2008 at 04:26 PM. |
09-03-2008, 04:25 PM | #7 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Newport Beach, CA
Posts: 1,088
| Honestly all that passion does wind down after a while if you suspect cheating you will need to catch him.. they do this really crazy thing on the radio out here and someone calls to offer free flowers no billing info needed because they are trying to promote a delivery service and that catches them everytime you just listen for who they want to send the flowers to and what the card says... not that he is cheating but its an option.. Im sure he is just busy like he says we go thru spurts like that as well
__________________ Laura Punkin and Piper |
09-03-2008, 04:28 PM | #8 |
YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Chinquapin NC
Posts: 654
| oh! believe it or not, I just tryed to make you feel better. Sorry if I didn't
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