looking for advice/opinion

[marcerella02]

been having a difficult time lately... in june my bf of almost 3 years broke up with me and i was devastated... he moved on to a new gf rather quickly and i was even more heartbroken.. since then i've slowly mended my heart to be at at place where i still really missed him but i dind't think about him every hour of the day! i was home over the holidays and his bestfriend (a good friend of mine too) wanted to make plans to see me.. which struck me as odd because we don't hang out much anymore since josh (my ex) and i broke up. so anyways.. i went and saw him... just got caught up on eachother's lives but he was interested in my dating status (he has a gf.. so i knew it wasn't for him) and in the back of my mind i was thinking.. i wonder if he is doing this for josh.. but i let that htought go.. then a few days later i got an email from josh out of no where (we stopped talking once he got his new gf) wishing me a merry christmas and so on.. i was really taken aback by the email since i expected to never talk to him again... a lot of my friends are saying that since he moved on to his new gf so fast ( id on' think he's with her anymore. but could be wrong) he didn't have time to miss me or whatever but is now realizing what he did wrong and might be trying to get back into my life... i've been so sad lately... i miss him horribly and while i know i shoudln't.... i let myself think about what if he does come back and how nice it owuld be to have him back... (i know i know... i should never take him back.. but don't ppl deserve a second chance) anywyas.. sorry for the rambling.. but i feel if i didin't get it out its just going to get worse.. does anyone have an opinion... are all of these just coincidences or do you think he is really trying to figure out where i am in life and see if he can fit back in?? anything is helpful... i need to get my heart back together again...

[Saleswman]

I would tread lightly here......

He probably hears that you are doing fine now....not moping around.....

then again....he could feel guilty.......


I would be VERY CAREFUL......your doing well without him.....

[marcerella02]

but what if i could be doing really well with him too ? blah.. i just sit here and play these games with myself.... we are on holidays right now in Florida and i'm so lonely.. he used to come with us and we'd do stuff togther.. now it i sjust me and my parents and layla and i hate it.. i can't wait ti get back home... everywhere we go just reminds me of him... i was doing so well... and now....

[Breny]

Ya know what??? Go with your heart. Go with your gut. And take it slow. Only YOU know whats best for YOU, and if its him......go for it. Life is too short to be miserable. Just take it day by day and see where its going.
Only YOU can look out for YOU.
Good luck in what you decide and I hope you find your happiness

[Rockster's Mom]

Personally I would not even give him the time of day. I dated a guy for 4 yrs and he did the same thing your guy did broke up with me and moved in with someone else. When he found out I was not sitting at home crying over him, he would call me and send me flowers. Well I did no snooping and found out the girl he moved in with kicked him out and he needed a place to stay. So, if I were you I would be very cautious and would protect my own feelings. Good Luck!!!

[Jaxon's mom]

If he broke up with you once, what's not to say that he'd do it again if you got back together? I think you would be setting yourself up for more heartache if you let him back into your life.

You've started healing and I wouldn't let him back into your heart.

[red98vett]

Girl - you need to get out more - there's TONS of men out there and no rule that says he's the only one for you - GO DO SOMETHING FUN and get your mind off him.....I promise - if things went like this one time - they probably will again and you don't need him....

Change is very hard but in most cases - it works out for the best. Give yourself more credit than you are - there IS another guy out there for you - lots of them !!! Sit down and make a list in your mind about the good things AND BAD things in your relationship - many times after we break up we tend to only think of the good things cause we miss them - and in turn - we end up convincing ourselves it was better than it really was

You broke up for a reason - and I'm sorry for that but you need to get on with YOUR life and be happy !!! Look at the new year coming as a time for a fresh start !! You can do it

[Lexi's_Mommy]

I have to say follow your heart. ONLY you will know what to do.

Did he mistreat you, was he good to you, and etc.?

My husband and I started dating 14 years ago we were young and carefree. I became pregnant at 18 and I broke up with him for what seem to be many reasons at the time. We were broke up for 2 years and then 1 night our baby girl got sit an he came over to see her. We sat up all night just talking and have been together since. MANY people told him not to get back with me, well we showed them all we have been married almost 10 years and we are so in love. He is my world and I know he loves me as much as I love him.

[Lou]

I can't say that you shouldn't get back with your boyfriend if that is what he is aiming at but I can tell you that there is someone better for you out there. The RIGHT guy wouldn't have broken up with you in the first place.
I once had my heart broken and managed to get over it by imagining the jerk in boxer shorts, grinning (toothless) at me like an idiot with his hand down his shorts scratching his twins. I made him look ridiculous and undesirable in my mind and eventually I started thinking of him as ridiculous and undesirable. I don't remember where I learned about that but I sure appreciated knowing it. You can make up your own scenario. Hope this helps.
Hugs
Lou

P.S. No matter what happens you WILL stop hurting eventually. And you CAN stop thinking about him.

[red98vett]

Originally Posted by Lou

I can't say that you shouldn't get back with your boyfriend if that is what he is aiming at but I can tell you that there is someone better for you out there. The RIGHT guy wouldn't have broken up with you in the first place.
I once had my heart broken and managed to get over it by imagining the jerk in boxer shorts, grinning (toothless) at me like an idiot with his hand down his shorts scratching his twins. I made him look ridiculous and undesirable in my mind and eventually I started thinking of him as ridiculous and undesirable. I don't remember where I learned about that but I sure appreciated knowing it. You can make up your own scenario. Hope this helps.
Hugs
Lou

P.S. No matter what happens you WILL stop hurting eventually. And you CAN stop thinking about him.

ROTF !!!!! I GOTTA start thinking of my ex that way !! too funny !!! my problem is he is GORGEOUS and a super nice guy too - I want to cry everytime we talk - what was I thinking ???

[stephluvsangel6]

All I Can Say Is Weigh Things Out And If You Feel Its Right Follow Yourself, But Think About Why He Broke Up With You, Will That Happen Again? What Were Things You Wished He Wouldnt Do And What You Can Do With Someone Else? I Mean Weigh It Alllll Out Everyhting You Can Think Of That Had Or Has To Do With You 2 Look At It And Follow Yourself, Dont Go With Him Just Cause You Are Lonely, Go With Him Because Thats Who You Want To Be With,

[I Love Bailey]

The Holidays alway bring out the what if's...people are lonely and wonder about what could have been. I would just keep him as a friend for now and see if he has changed. I bet you have, your stronger then you thought you were! Have you dated at all? If not, go on a few, just as friends, have fun meet new people, Mr Right could be around, your just not paying attention because you are thinking of what you don't have.
You are in Florida right now on vacation? Enjoy your self, I always have a great time whenever I go on vacation. No laundry,cooking, or cleaning Pamper yourself, relax, meet new people.
Write down a list of what YOU want and don't want. It really helps keep things in perspective. I just lent a girlfriend of mine a book: The Aladin Factor
She just called me crying, asking why I never lent it to her before?! She wasn't ready to read it before!!

Anyway, Good Luck with whatever you decide, just be sure it is right for YOU!