Dealing with the EX - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

LuvMySissy · 08-06-2006, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

Ohh I agree with you!
This woman has made doctors appt as MY kids mother! My lil 9 yr old fell out of the top of a bunkbed while at her dads house cause they did not have a safety rail on the bed and she broke her collar bone, they didnt even call me till they were leaving the hospital!
So towards the last when she was about to have her brace off, this woman made Haze docs appt and when I found out about it, she canceled it! so I tracked them down and made her pull the car over cause she had my kids in the car, I jumped out of my van and told my kids to get out of the car! she looks at my kids and says, stay in the car! I was like, listen here BI, these are my kids and they are coming with me! so the kids get out of the car and I have Haleigh holding my hand and this woman takes her car and acts like she is going to run me over! then she flips me off and says BI&^%, you are going to pay for this!!!!! I was like.. WTH?
So yeah, she is a little out there if you ask me, so now you know why Branda dont want anything to do with her! The other 2 are just innocent and dont know any better and pretty much are forced to go over there.

I'm surprised he still has contact with your younger two if he and this wack job have other kids together (or even if they are her kids). I think Branda has the right idea here. As far as your other two go, I would make it VERY CLEAR to your EX that if anything happens to them requiring medical care, that you are to be called immediately. She has no legal right to act as their guardian for medical treatment and the doctors treating can be held liable for this.

mylittletigger · 08-06-2006, 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

I don't understand how a woman can carry a baby in side her for 9 months and then just abandon her like your mom did to you, I'm so sorry for that! I love my children with all my heart and there is just no way in hell I would ever do something like that, and for my childrens father to act like this, I just wish I could understand him and why he chooses to be like this.

I know. well She has a chemical imbalance which caused her to be mentally, physically and emotionally abusive. so that is why I decide to not have contact with her. without her I wouldn't be here but I think it was for the better that my daddy took my baby brother and I away from her.(my baby brother is now 22 but I call him that because I practically raised him and I couldn't live without him, literally.)

mylittletigger · 08-06-2006, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

Ohh I agree with you!
This woman has made doctors appt as MY kids mother! My lil 9 yr old fell out of the top of a bunkbed while at her dads house cause they did not have a safety rail on the bed and she broke her collar bone, they didnt even call me till they were leaving the hospital!
So towards the last when she was about to have her brace off, this woman made Haze docs appt and when I found out about it, she canceled it! so I tracked them down and made her pull the car over cause she had my kids in the car, I jumped out of my van and told my kids to get out of the car! she looks at my kids and says, stay in the car! I was like, listen here BI, these are my kids and they are coming with me! so the kids get out of the car and I have Haleigh holding my hand and this woman takes her car and acts like she is going to run me over! then she flips me off and says BI&^%, you are going to pay for this!!!!! I was like.. WTH?
So yeah, she is a little out there if you ask me, so now you know why Branda dont want anything to do with her! The other 2 are just innocent and dont know any better and pretty much are forced to go over there.

OK my real mom was kookoo but oh my goodness that step mom needs some meds and fast. who in their right minds thinks they have the right to tell another ones kids what to do? she's not their mom she's their step mom and she obviously doesn't really care all that much or else she wouldn't have acted like she was going to run you and your daughter over. wow. the nerve of some people.

yougetthesmiles · 08-06-2006, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mylittletigger

OK my real mom was kookoo but oh my goodness that step mom needs some meds and fast. who in their right minds thinks they have the right to tell another ones kids what to do? she's not their mom she's their step mom and she obviously doesn't really care all that much or else she wouldn't have acted like she was going to run you and your daughter over. wow. the nerve of some people.

YUP and thats who takes care of my kids everyother weekend! and by law I have to let them go!

mylittletigger · 08-06-2006, 06:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

YUP and thats who takes care of my kids everyother weekend! and by law I have to let them go!

man I'm ferocious. the first thing I thought of was BI*&^ slapping her when no one is looking. LOL give her a real reason to be mad. I'm not really a mean or hurtful person but I can't stand people like her. Because of what I went through I get po'd at people for slapping their kids in public. I'll even yell at them. I've even been asked "do you have kids? then you can't talk" I just don't have a tolerance for rude ignorant people.

yougetthesmiles · 08-06-2006, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mylittletigger

man I'm ferocious. the first thing I thought of was BI*&^ slapping her when no one is looking. LOL give her a real reason to be mad. I'm not really a mean or hurtful person but I can't stand people like her. Because of what I went through I get po'd at people for slapping their kids in public. I'll even yell at them. I've even been asked "do you have kids? then you can't talk" I just don't have a tolerance for rude ignorant people.

Ohh trust me, me and her have went around and around many times!
When I 1st met this woman, I tried everything in my power to be nice to her! I even gave her flowers on mothers day! when she had her 1st son, I gave them a gift! I did everything to show her she had no reason to be threatened by me, but it didnt do any good, she hates me cause I had him 1st!!

mylittletigger · 08-06-2006, 06:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yougetthesmiles

Ohh trust me, me and her have went around and around many times!
When I 1st met this woman, I tried everything in my power to be nice to her! I even gave her flowers on mothers day! when she had her 1st son, I gave them a gift! I did everything to show her she had no reason to be threatened by me, but it didnt do any good, she hates me cause I had him 1st!!

and you're probably prettier then she is. Plus you had his kids first and it sounds like she always has to be number one or at least the center of attention. she sounds really immature. LOL I'd tell her to grow up!!!

yougetthesmiles · 08-06-2006, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mylittletigger

and you're probably prettier then she is. Plus you had his kids first and it sounds like she always has to be number one or at least the center of attention. she sounds really immature. LOL I'd tell her to grow up!!!

Ohh I have! she just hangs up on me!

cheryl000 · 08-06-2006, 06:47 PM

I think it's a beautiful thing that your daughter is so close to her stepfather. I would be so happy that she has a REAL father figure in her life. To her he must be more of a father than her biological father. I really think it's awesome when a man can take in another child as his own.
Your daughter must have real respect for this man and in a way this is HER way of showing it. It seems like something she has seriously thought over and wants to do. In a way it seems like this is the highest honor she feels like she can give back to him. She seems really happy that he's in her life. If this is what she wants and esspecially since her biological father says it's okay I would make it between her and the stepfather. Your family is very lucky, it usually doesn't work out that way. It sounds like the stepfather is a fine man and has earned your daughters love and respect.

Kona · 08-06-2006, 06:55 PM

Growing up I was in a similar situation. My "biodad" left us when I was less than a year old. From that time until I was about 12 I had to see him everyother weekend, half of my school vacations, and half of the summer. I hated it! He was never home to spend time with me, he always thought it was fine because I'd be over there spending time with my sisters. Well when I was 12 he told me I could start to decide when I would go visit him. Well, I never went... he called me a year later to inform me that he had already moved across the country. (Thanks dad...) I saw him for a week when I was 16 and I had realized that we had NO relationship what so ever. About 6 months before I turned 18, I spoke to my mom about having my step dad legally adopt me. (He married my mom when I was 6, he IS and has ALWAYS been my dad.) So we took the legal steps for the adoption and name change. Unlike your ex, my biodad wasn't going to have it. They tired to come up with every reason in the book why I shouldn't do it. (I'm too young, my parent's were brainwashing me, I need to be out on my own for a while to make my own decisions, etc.) But the judge didn't care. He saw that my relationship with my step dad was the type of relationship a father/daughter should have. So he approved it.

I think that if your daughter feels closer to her step dad, let her do it. Honestly, it really didn't change my life that much. But in a way it was my way of thanking my stepdad for all that he has done for me. It has been about 8 years since I made the decision, and I don't regret it at all.

SORRY that this ended up so long, I hope it helps.

Nikko's_human · 08-07-2006, 03:57 PM

i can totally relate to your daughter's situation. My parents divorced when I was 4 and my "real" father never gave a crap about me. His birthday is the day before mine so it was impossible for him to forget, yet I never received a card or a call. He is an alcoholic and a very dysfuncional person which is why my mom left him. I kept his last name but felt no connection to it. When I recently got married, everyone asked me if i was going to hyphenate my name and add my husband's to mine. Absolutely NOT!! I have taken my husband's name fully and now i have a name to be proud of. If this is something your daughter really wants to do, then I would support her decision. the only thing that upsets me is that by doing so, you would be letting that deadbeat dad off the hook too easily instead of forcing him to be a man and take care of his children.

08-06-2006, 06:55 PM	#25
Kona Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Bay Area, California Posts: 1,877	Growing up I was in a similar situation. My "biodad" left us when I was less than a year old. From that time until I was about 12 I had to see him everyother weekend, half of my school vacations, and half of the summer. I hated it! He was never home to spend time with me, he always thought it was fine because I'd be over there spending time with my sisters. Well when I was 12 he told me I could start to decide when I would go visit him. Well, I never went... he called me a year later to inform me that he had already moved across the country. (Thanks dad...) I saw him for a week when I was 16 and I had realized that we had NO relationship what so ever. About 6 months before I turned 18, I spoke to my mom about having my step dad legally adopt me. (He married my mom when I was 6, he IS and has ALWAYS been my dad.) So we took the legal steps for the adoption and name change. Unlike your ex, my biodad wasn't going to have it. They tired to come up with every reason in the book why I shouldn't do it. (I'm too young, my parent's were brainwashing me, I need to be out on my own for a while to make my own decisions, etc.) But the judge didn't care. He saw that my relationship with my step dad was the type of relationship a father/daughter should have. So he approved it. I think that if your daughter feels closer to her step dad, let her do it. Honestly, it really didn't change my life that much. But in a way it was my way of thanking my stepdad for all that he has done for me. It has been about 8 years since I made the decision, and I don't regret it at all. SORRY that this ended up so long, I hope it helps. __________________ Kona Bernie

08-07-2006, 03:57 PM	#26
Nikko's_human Proudly owned by Nikko Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Bronx, New York Posts: 768	i can totally relate to your daughter's situation. My parents divorced when I was 4 and my "real" father never gave a crap about me. His birthday is the day before mine so it was impossible for him to forget, yet I never received a card or a call. He is an alcoholic and a very dysfuncional person which is why my mom left him. I kept his last name but felt no connection to it. When I recently got married, everyone asked me if i was going to hyphenate my name and add my husband's to mine. Absolutely NOT!! I have taken my husband's name fully and now i have a name to be proud of. If this is something your daughter really wants to do, then I would support her decision. the only thing that upsets me is that by doing so, you would be letting that deadbeat dad off the hook too easily instead of forcing him to be a man and take care of his children. __________________ NIKKO and his mommy NECEE

08-06-2006, 06:47 PM	#24
cheryl000 YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: none Posts: 1,495	I think it's a beautiful thing that your daughter is so close to her stepfather. I would be so happy that she has a REAL father figure in her life. To her he must be more of a father than her biological father. I really think it's awesome when a man can take in another child as his own. Your daughter must have real respect for this man and in a way this is HER way of showing it. It seems like something she has seriously thought over and wants to do. In a way it seems like this is the highest honor she feels like she can give back to him. She seems really happy that he's in her life. If this is what she wants and esspecially since her biological father says it's okay I would make it between her and the stepfather. Your family is very lucky, it usually doesn't work out that way. It sounds like the stepfather is a fine man and has earned your daughters love and respect.