Do you seek the approval of others?

[chachi]

Im a Christian so I try my best to think what would Jesus do in a situation and do it. Now Im not close to perfect so sometimes I fail on that but the stronger my faith goes the more Im able to do it. I think you can waste alot of time and energy seeking the approval of others though and sometimes they arent deserving of seeking their approval for so you have to be discerning

[Micah my love]

Originally Posted by Nancy1999

I agree with the others, it's a wasted effort seeking others approval, in the long haul, it means nothing, for some people will give you approval, when you know that you've done the wrong thing, and others will never give you approval, it’s their way of controlling you. I still want those close to me to be happy with my choices and decisions, but mostly I seek my own approval, and I give it to myself, if I believe I've deserved it. I’m actually quite generous with myself, and I think being a mom helped me with that, I was kind to my children, and it’s easier to now be kind to myself. I was way to hard on myself when I was younger.

Excellent post..my exact feelings,but you can express them so much better than me

[Nancy1999]

Originally Posted by Micah my love

Excellent post..my exact feelings,but you can express them so much better than me

Lol, approval still feels good at any age, and so many people here give it so generously, may it be returned to you 7 fold!

[Buster Brown]

Originally Posted by Nancy1999

Lol, approval still feels good at any age, and so many people here give it so generously, may it be returned to you 7 fold!

LOL Too true. We may not seek approval but it is sure nice to get.

[Micah my love]

Originally Posted by Nancy1999

Lol, approval still feels good at any age, and so many people here give it so generously, may it be returned to you 7 fold!

Thank you Nancy

[Ellie May]

Sometimes I fall into it and have to stop myself. And then a lot of times I'm very bullheaded and will do my own thing and people can just get over it. I'm not easily controlled. I do go into guilt about not pleasing others and feeling like I need to (wrongfully).

I do think there is a very fine line between seeking approval and seeking guidance. I do have a few people in my life that may not always approve of what I do. If I change my ways, it isn't so much about making sure they approve, but more of the extreme respect I have for them and my willingness to let them tell me what they see and why it may not be good.

[Lisa and Pic]

Originally Posted by shodanusmc

I have never worried about it. I would never join a Country Club that would willingly accpet me.

Love the way you think, Steve!

[teffiemoore]

I think we all love approval when we do get it, but the older I get, I don't try to seek it anymore. If it happens with whatever I'm doing, it's an extra...and quite surprising, lol

[Lil Sis]

I have a hard time with this, I am a people pleaser..to much so. My childhood was not stable so I think I am that way because I want pease..hate conflict.

There are two thoughts I would like to add.

Sometimes it isn't so much what people think of me, because I agree sometime negative people are going to think poor of you no matter what, but you have to stand up for your self. I have an in- law that I have "stood up to" and refuse to be around. There are family members who put me down for this, but I had enough. If the family can't understand or doesn't support me... Oh well.

The other point.. What do you want to be remembered for. I work hard to be "happy" and pleasant. I really don't care what if people agree with me but I know I Want to be remembered for being kind and helpful-- a giver not a taker! I will stand up for my values.. But I want to be a kind person of integrity .. That is what we all need to think about more than pleasing people, what are our values and what do we want to be remembered for?

[capt_noonie]

Originally Posted by Buster Brown

LOL Too true. We may not seek approval but it is sure nice to get.

This is how I feel. I do my own thing, and don't worry about what others will think. However if someone I respect gives me good feedback about it, that makes it even better.

I never waste my time or energy trying to get approval from people that I don't respect or people that don't respect me. And I won't lose sleep over what strangers may think about me. I don't usually have to make a decision of should I or shouldn't I do something bc someone I respect would not approve. like, I think my tattoos are probably not something my dad likes, but I did it still bc they make me feel good.

When I was a teenager I purposely dressed and acted in order to stand out and not be accepted. LOL I'll admit it was pretty fun. Being able to wear and say whatever and get away with it.

[manolos mom]

I love to surround myself around people that are individual thinkers. I love people who are themselves no matter what others say.

[bettyeanne]

No ... non-controversial ... everyone is entitled to their opinion. I'm just me, take it or leave it.