15 year old son not interested in driving

[JesStang]

Originally Posted by shodanusmc

Same here! I was in the car waiting on my 16th Birthday. How far are you from Lawton? I went to the Basic Officer Artillery Class at Ft. Sill many years ago. The Corps doesn't have its own school. Great school, and loved the time spent there.

Lawton is about 1-1.25 hours from me. I don't go there often but I've been a few times. I work on Tinker AFB so most of my time is in/around OKC.

[celstu1]

Originally Posted by shodanusmc

Last thing you want to do is push the issue. I doubt he is afraid of failing a test. Heck, here is Illinois we have drivers that can't speak english, that are not citizens, and those that bribe the State Examiners. Give him time.

Speaking for myself, I could not ait to be 16 so I could drive. Got my license the day I turned 16. Been anti-climatic after that day. Give him some time. Mayhe he knows he is not ready, maybe not.

Ok.... I am not a true mother, however I live with my bf of 3 years who has a (now) 14 & 17 year old. I watched the 17 year old struggle with the driving/license issue. First off, he thought he was too 'cool' to mess up in front of his Dad so he never wanted to go out driving. He used to say he was too tired ALLLLL the time. (sheer laziness??? I wonder..... )

I do think he was a bit nervous to 'grow up' and resisted it a bit. But I have to disagree with the above. Pushing him a little bit is not bad for him. We pushed bfs son to drive and now he is 17 and completely mobile and LOVES it! It has taught him to grow up a bit, be responsible and it has taught him some problem solving skills on his own. These are all VERY important things that kids need to know as they grow up, because it's inevitable.... they DO grow up!

I don't think you NEED to force him behind the wheel... but I think some parking lot cruising with you in the car, short distances on back roads that are not busy, etc... will help grow his confidence and give him a taste of freedom he could have with a license.

Good Luck!

[celstu1]

Oh yeah and when they get a girlfriend that they are allowed to take out.... that is great motivation too!

[Suze225]

I have the same issue with two of my girls. Cassidy is 18 and just got her drivers permit about 7 months ago. Seems to be uninterested in getting her license, even though she has moved out of the house. She had no interest in driving what so ever. I have a 16 1/2 year old daughter Sydney who still hasn't gotten her permit, nor does she really want to.

In AZ you have to have your permit for 7 months before you can take your licesnse test, unless you are over 18, then you can just get the license if you pass the test.

THE DAY my oldest was 15 and I believe it was 5 months she had her permit, and got her license the first possible day she could. All kids are different I guess. I had a car before I got my permit even, so I was way excited to drive. My kids KNOW they have to buy their own cars, and pay for their own gas, insurance etc....not so fun to drive when you have to pay for all that I guess. LOL

[Ringo1]

Well. The family that we carpool with to swim team has a daughter the same age as Matt. She got her permit a couple of weeks ago. The other night, her Mom let her drive them all home from swim team.

I THINK this gave my son some incentive because he says next week-end he will take his test.

He also told me that he thinks he will be a terrible driver and that he is very nervous about driving.

Probably he has listened to me talk too much about the accident cases I handle.

Fingers crossed. AND my girlfriend (very laid back) says she will take him out driving the first time. I think this will help as I seem only to make him more nervous.

[Patti]

That's good. After I got into the car for the first time with my 16 year old dtr, I took her on my sisters private road. She drove down the road and then I said Ok I'll drive now. She starts to get out of the car without putting it in park! Yikes. I called a driving school to give her a few hours of lessons before she started Drivers ed at school. I think that really helped my nerves and gave her more confidence.

[PandaGirl]

So what he doesn't want to drive right now, he may change his mind in 6 months or in two years. Let him do what he wants and when he feels comfortable doing it. I don't see any kind of problem with him not wanting to drive . To be honest I would be relieved my oldest is 19 and when he started to drive I literally sat on my bed with the window open looking out for hours for him to pull up in the cold NY winter that is how scared I was. I wouldn't push any child into doing something that really isn't that important, something I would push a bit is if it was good for his well being. But driving for me at least was one of the scariest things, I wish my 3 boys were babies again.

[Ringo1]

Originally Posted by PandaGirl

So what he doesn't want to drive right now, he may change his mind in 6 months or in two years. Let him do what he wants and when he feels comfortable doing it. I don't see any kind of problem with him not wanting to drive . To be honest I would be relieved my oldest is 19 and when he started to drive I literally sat on my bed with the window open looking out for hours for him to pull up in the cold NY winter that is how scared I was. I wouldn't push any child into doing something that really isn't that important, something I would push a bit is if it was good for his well being. But driving for me at least was one of the scariest things, I wish my 3 boys were babies again.

If it weren't for his swim practices (6 days a week) sometimes twice a day (from 5:30 am to 7:00); I probably wouldn't care if he drove or not.

However, I work and his practice begins while I am still at work. Our carpool is falling apart as all the kids are beginning to drive and I am simply afraid I cannot leave work early EVERY DAY or come in late on a regular basis ~ to get him to and from practice. I have to keep my job. We are in a new state; with no supportive family, etc. And he is hard core about not missing any practice.

IF he were one of those kids that didn't mind asking someone for a ride (he won't do it) then I wouldn't care either. But it's soon going to be all me and he will not make all his practices. Simple as that. I can live with that but he can't.

So that's my big worry. He needs to be able to get himself to and from practice OR to be able to scrounge himself up a ride; OR be chill with the fact that I cannot always sneak out of the office 1 1/2 hours early.

It's a fine line I walk believe you me!