Missing Jake! Did I Make the Wrong Decision? - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

JeanieK · 10-07-2006, 05:11 PM

Your pain is understandable and I guess we're all a little selfish when we lose one. Take comfort in knowing that he is happy and his new momma is very happy. It takes a good heart to do the right thing.

Marcellacml · 10-07-2006, 05:15 PM

I think you made the right decision plus it wasn't healthy for you or him when he was killing those chickens.

Brookef18 · 10-07-2006, 05:18 PM

I know how you feel... I had a dog I had to give away once... it was soooo hard. But I will tell you that you are greaving now and time will heal you. You can visit but wait till you are feeling ok about him being gone. You did the right thing, you miss him because he was a part of the family, but he was unmanagable and you could not give him the time he needed so let him go, let this other woman love him, and in time she will share him with you. she will want to know you are feeling good about his new home, if she doesn't feel safe about it she won't let you see him. Let things go for now, greave, and allow yourself to miss him, and then when you feel better about it(And you will) THEN go see him. it will be fine. You don't want to rip him away from his new home.

GucciMyGirl · 10-07-2006, 05:57 PM

I agree with the rest, you did the right thing. It will take time for the pain to go away, but think of it this way, he moved on to a happy home in which he is probably being treated like a king. He needs that attention and I am sure he is bringing happiness to the woman who has the cancer. They are good for each other and both will thrive. , you didn't lose him to sickness or death, that would have been devisating you can always go visit. You made a woman very happy and that is a beautiful thing.

Bnot · 10-07-2006, 06:47 PM

Could it be guilt hitting you also?

Please know that you did the very best (and hardest) thing you could for Jake. You gave him a home, with someone who will be giving him attention all the time. And with what you described, seems to me, like she needs Jake, as much as he does her.

Try to remember that now Jake isn't getting beat up by chickens on a daily basis now.

I'm sorry your hurting so bad from letting him go. And I'm also sure this wasn't an easy decision. I think you did the best thing in the world for Jake myself!

Lacy's Mom · 10-07-2006, 07:10 PM

I have to agree with the rest - you did the right thing. I don't think you would have been able to stop him from killing. Many years ago I had a chow that killed a Grand Champion Black Faced Sheep and I had to have him put to sleep because that was the law in the city where I lived. I wish I had given him to a new home before that happened. A few months earlier he had chased some goats and did some damage to their milk sacks. In that case, the owner was really nice and I just paid the vet bills. Laws are really strict when it comes to killing livestock.

I have to compare your love for him the way I think about young mothers who have babies and love them enough to want what is best for them by letting them be adopted. I know it must be terribly hard, but how can doing the right thing be wrong.

sweetr72 · 10-07-2006, 07:16 PM

I can understand what you are going through..I got married very very young and decided with a newborn baby to get a springer spaniel..in an apartment!!! Her name was Belle and she really was a great dog, she just didnt do well in an apartment and I had no energy or time to devote to her. She needed alot of excersise and play time and I just wasnt capable of that at the time. I found a wonderful family for her and I missed her TERRIBLY...

About a week after she was gone I went to the store to get something and who is parked next to me but the owner and Belle...Belle was sooooooooo happy to see me and I drove away in tears..vowing never to get another dog until I had my own home and ALOT of time to devote to a pet. And that is what I did.

I think you did the right think and that Jake needs contant attention since he is such a busy boy...sounds like he needed to be an only 'child' and he is probably already very spoiled. When you feel you are ready to visit him without getting upset then go do it and you will feel more at ease with your decision I am sure...

Dawn

shadream · 10-07-2006, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kerri

I just can's figure out...Why am I crying so hard? Did I really do the right thing? This is really tearing at my heart. Right now, I would do anything to get him back. But, deep down I know he is in a better place...somewhere where he can be free and be happy. I am still crying almost a week later. I wish I could find peace....somewhere..

You did a wonderful thing for the little guy and his new owner, you must realize that when you love a pet or anyone for that matter that you love them enough to do what is best for them even if it means letting them go. Yes you are hurting right now and anyone would, you can't keep a pet that long and not love it. Take comfort in knowing what a blessing this little one is to this woman, the pain will pass and honestly you didn't have time for such a live wire.
God Bless

frankie mum · 10-08-2006, 03:53 AM

hi
i am really feel for you.puppy is like our baby.you loss him .because you did not know .how you feel when he gone.it is very sad for you.all you can do right now is think he is happy and love.and safe.and go to see him later on .he will never forget you.
hugs
nicki...

Mitzis Mom · 10-08-2006, 04:38 AM

I think you did the right thing and it shows your great heart and love to give the little guy the chance of the life he deserves. Maybe if you can accept your grief as necessary and the start of the healing process it will be less confusing for you. And PLEASE FORGIVE YOURSELF!!!!!

friesianlady · 10-08-2006, 04:46 AM

What a wonderful Mom you are, you gave someone something to live for. My oldest daughter just gave away her little Pom to a neighbor who has epilepsy and she is going through the same issuses as you. I feel that the dog now has a purpose in life, and thats to take care of their new owner. You did the right thing, and in your heart you know it too. Take comfort in knowing that Jake has a new owner who loves him.

Piccolo's mom · 10-08-2006, 04:59 AM

You did the right thing both for him and his new mom. You made her happy and he is in a better place. Give it a time and visit him when you're sure you won't take him back.

chachi · 10-08-2006, 06:02 AM

I think you made the right decision and it will get easier in time. Hang in there. Hugs from Chachi and Jewels

artie merlino · 10-08-2006, 09:53 AM

Sorry you miss him sooo........but you have to do what's right for him!
I don't fault Jake, our Dogs are a product of "Us" and our Training or lack of?
Beleive it or not alot of us forget that Yorkie's are Hunting Dogs they track,
stalk, dig for Prey and that means anything that moves! It's us humans that dress and parade them like living dolls......I know I do. You can't change decades of Breeding just b/c they are incredibly gorgeous and adorable?
They are what they are and they haven't changed in years that's what they were originally bred for. After you get over the initial pain & guilt you will be fine. Just try to concentrate on other things, getting a new puppy takes alot of time, energy and Training. It sounds like you have more important things to worry about?

Kerri · 10-08-2006, 10:52 AM

A week ago today (about this time) is when I let Jake run out to my sisters truck and jump in. I told her that is the way I wanted it to be. I spent over an hour with him beforehand just holding him and trying to explain. I know I am being selfish and I have to get over that. I even asked for Jake back in the middle of last week but my sister said "No". You did what was right.
As of last night I heard that Jake has became a "lap dog" and is very spoiled. The owner is impressed that she can leave him running freely all day with no accidents and he doesn't harm anything in her house. I guess that should be a positive note on my part. I did have him well trained...inside anyway.
I will always love Jake and would still take him back in a heartbeat. There was an agreement made in the beginning if it didn't work out for ANY reason, he was to be given back to me instead of just passing him on to a new home.
I offerred Jake's papers to the new owner but she wasn't even interested. That also lets me know that she loves Jake for who he is, not just what he has on paper.
Anyway, I'm still crying today. It is bad to say but I didn't cry over my 18 year old dog this much that had to be put to sleep earlier this year. I guess it was different because she was suffering tremendously. I realized in a day or two that I had done the right thing for her. I just can't seem to find peace yet of letting Jake go.

10-07-2006, 05:18 PM	#18
Brookef18 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Cape Cod Ma Posts: 1,855	I know how you feel... I had a dog I had to give away once... it was soooo hard. But I will tell you that you are greaving now and time will heal you. You can visit but wait till you are feeling ok about him being gone. You did the right thing, you miss him because he was a part of the family, but he was unmanagable and you could not give him the time he needed so let him go, let this other woman love him, and in time she will share him with you. she will want to know you are feeling good about his new home, if she doesn't feel safe about it she won't let you see him. Let things go for now, greave, and allow yourself to miss him, and then when you feel better about it(And you will) THEN go see him. it will be fine. You don't want to rip him away from his new home. __________________ Brooke (Chewy's and Sadie's Mom) visit us on dogster dogster.com/dogs/700047

10-08-2006, 03:53 AM	#24
frankie mum YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: australia Posts: 1,356	hi i am really feel for you.puppy is like our baby.you loss him .because you did not know .how you feel when he gone.it is very sad for you.all you can do right now is think he is happy and love.and safe.and go to see him later on .he will never forget you. hugs nicki... __________________ : nicki and emily

10-08-2006, 04:59 AM	#27
Piccolo's mom Donating Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Mississauga, Ontario, Canada Posts: 778	You did the right thing both for him and his new mom. You made her happy and he is in a better place. Give it a time and visit him when you're sure you won't take him back. __________________ Barb & Piccolo If your dog barks and doesn't fit in a bread roll, don't eat it.

10-08-2006, 06:02 AM	#28
chachi I Love My Yorkies Donating Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana Posts: 37,147	I think you made the right decision and it will get easier in time. Hang in there. Hugs from Chachi and Jewels __________________ Chachi's & Jewels Mom Jewels http://www.dogster.com/?132431 Chachi http://www.dogster.com/?132427

10-08-2006, 09:53 AM	#29
artie merlino YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Myrtle Beach,SC Posts: 697	The Right Thing! Sorry you miss him sooo........but you have to do what's right for him! I don't fault Jake, our Dogs are a product of "Us" and our Training or lack of? Beleive it or not alot of us forget that Yorkie's are Hunting Dogs they track, stalk, dig for Prey and that means anything that moves! It's us humans that dress and parade them like living dolls......I know I do. You can't change decades of Breeding just b/c they are incredibly gorgeous and adorable? They are what they are and they haven't changed in years that's what they were originally bred for. After you get over the initial pain & guilt you will be fine. Just try to concentrate on other things, getting a new puppy takes alot of time, energy and Training. It sounds like you have more important things to worry about?

10-07-2006, 05:11 PM	#16
JeanieK Donating YT 12K Club Member Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Council Bluffs Iowa Posts: 12,552	Your pain is understandable and I guess we're all a little selfish when we lose one. Take comfort in knowing that he is happy and his new momma is very happy. It takes a good heart to do the right thing.

10-07-2006, 05:15 PM	#17
Marcellacml Cosmo, Minnie, and Lillian Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: New York Posts: 3,107	I think you made the right decision plus it wasn't healthy for you or him when he was killing those chickens.

10-07-2006, 05:57 PM	#19
GucciMyGirl YT 500 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Brooklyn, NY Posts: 550	I agree with the rest, you did the right thing. It will take time for the pain to go away, but think of it this way, he moved on to a happy home in which he is probably being treated like a king. He needs that attention and I am sure he is bringing happiness to the woman who has the cancer. They are good for each other and both will thrive. , you didn't lose him to sickness or death, that would have been devisating you can always go visit. You made a woman very happy and that is a beautiful thing.

10-07-2006, 06:47 PM	#20
Bnot YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Mobile AL Posts: 1,399	Could it be guilt hitting you also? Please know that you did the very best (and hardest) thing you could for Jake. You gave him a home, with someone who will be giving him attention all the time. And with what you described, seems to me, like she needs Jake, as much as he does her. Try to remember that now Jake isn't getting beat up by chickens on a daily basis now. I'm sorry your hurting so bad from letting him go. And I'm also sure this wasn't an easy decision. I think you did the best thing in the world for Jake myself!

10-07-2006, 07:10 PM	#21
Lacy's Mom YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: El Paso, Texas Posts: 3,065	I have to agree with the rest - you did the right thing. I don't think you would have been able to stop him from killing. Many years ago I had a chow that killed a Grand Champion Black Faced Sheep and I had to have him put to sleep because that was the law in the city where I lived. I wish I had given him to a new home before that happened. A few months earlier he had chased some goats and did some damage to their milk sacks. In that case, the owner was really nice and I just paid the vet bills. Laws are really strict when it comes to killing livestock. I have to compare your love for him the way I think about young mothers who have babies and love them enough to want what is best for them by letting them be adopted. I know it must be terribly hard, but how can doing the right thing be wrong.

10-07-2006, 07:16 PM	#22
sweetr72 No Longer a Member Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 6,111	I can understand what you are going through..I got married very very young and decided with a newborn baby to get a springer spaniel..in an apartment!!! Her name was Belle and she really was a great dog, she just didnt do well in an apartment and I had no energy or time to devote to her. She needed alot of excersise and play time and I just wasnt capable of that at the time. I found a wonderful family for her and I missed her TERRIBLY... About a week after she was gone I went to the store to get something and who is parked next to me but the owner and Belle...Belle was sooooooooo happy to see me and I drove away in tears..vowing never to get another dog until I had my own home and ALOT of time to devote to a pet. And that is what I did. I think you did the right think and that Jake needs contant attention since he is such a busy boy...sounds like he needed to be an only 'child' and he is probably already very spoiled. When you feel you are ready to visit him without getting upset then go do it and you will feel more at ease with your decision I am sure... Dawn

10-08-2006, 04:38 AM	#25
Mitzis Mom No Longer a Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Maryland Posts: 2,837	I think you did the right thing and it shows your great heart and love to give the little guy the chance of the life he deserves. Maybe if you can accept your grief as necessary and the start of the healing process it will be less confusing for you. And PLEASE FORGIVE YOURSELF!!!!!

10-08-2006, 04:46 AM	#26
friesianlady Donating YT Addict Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: NEW HAMPSHIRE Posts: 426	What a wonderful Mom you are, you gave someone something to live for. My oldest daughter just gave away her little Pom to a neighbor who has epilepsy and she is going through the same issuses as you. I feel that the dog now has a purpose in life, and thats to take care of their new owner. You did the right thing, and in your heart you know it too. Take comfort in knowing that Jake has a new owner who loves him.

10-08-2006, 10:52 AM	#30
Kerri Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: NC Posts: 121	A week ago today (about this time) is when I let Jake run out to my sisters truck and jump in. I told her that is the way I wanted it to be. I spent over an hour with him beforehand just holding him and trying to explain. I know I am being selfish and I have to get over that. I even asked for Jake back in the middle of last week but my sister said "No". You did what was right. As of last night I heard that Jake has became a "lap dog" and is very spoiled. The owner is impressed that she can leave him running freely all day with no accidents and he doesn't harm anything in her house. I guess that should be a positive note on my part. I did have him well trained...inside anyway. I will always love Jake and would still take him back in a heartbeat. There was an agreement made in the beginning if it didn't work out for ANY reason, he was to be given back to me instead of just passing him on to a new home. I offerred Jake's papers to the new owner but she wasn't even interested. That also lets me know that she loves Jake for who he is, not just what he has on paper. Anyway, I'm still crying today. It is bad to say but I didn't cry over my 18 year old dog this much that had to be put to sleep earlier this year. I guess it was different because she was suffering tremendously. I realized in a day or two that I had done the right thing for her. I just can't seem to find peace yet of letting Jake go.