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09-19-2017, 09:49 AM | #1 |
YorkieTalk Newbie! Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: Roseville, CA, US
Posts: 3
| Prefers Husband Hi - We got our 1 1/2 year old yorkie mix from a shelter 7 months ago. My husband got her for me, because I have 3 kids in college now and the empty nest thing was getting to me - he said I needed something to cuddle next to me. Well she cuddles alright - next to him. He doesn't give her a lot of attention/petting. I feed her. I walk her 3 times a day. I take care of all of her needs (the groomer and vet). He'll pick her up and sit her next to me, the minute he sits down, she's back next to him. He leaves the room, she follows him. I know this is selfishly stupid - she can't help who she prefers - but it hurts. Especially considering the reason we got her. Any advice is appreciated. |
Welcome Guest! | |
09-20-2017, 06:43 AM | #2 |
Donating YT 3000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2014 Location: E.Stroudsburg, Pa.
Posts: 67,956
| Welcome to YT, and thank you for rescuing. Because you are home all day with her and hubby is not, she is excited to see him when he comes home and wants to spend time with daddy. 99% the person that feeds and walks the dog is who the dog bonds with, there are 1% that chooses the person that does not do that, I guess you fall into that 1%. I would feel hurt to if my dog chose someone over me. Aside from feeding, walking, vet and groomer which btw are not happy events for any dog lol, do you play with her, have you trained her basic commands, sit, stay, down, drop I, leave it. Training basic commands build a strong bond between owner and dog. If you don't know how to train for basic commands, take your pup for a training course, there you will be taught how to train a dog, you take these tools home with you and work with your dog giving her treats when she does what you want plus lots of phrase, clap hands, made a big fuss, show her how happy she has made you. Dogs love to please their humans. Time and lots of patience is needed, show no frustration if she is not catching on to certain commands. Teach one command at time, when she has that one command down pat then move on to a new command. Training your dog builds a strong bond.
__________________ Joan, mom to Cody RIP Matese Schnae Kajon Kia forever in my A House Is Not A Home Without A Dog |
09-20-2017, 07:13 AM | #3 |
Donating YT 5000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: Brownstown MI USA
Posts: 18,650
| Toni always wanted a yorkie and we have the same situation. They love her dearly but they usually want to lay with me. But I have to admit I cheat. I keep a little container of cheerios next to my recliner and they know it. I am not ashamed to admit that I have bribed my way to being their favorite.
__________________ Max & Sasha's daddy |
09-20-2017, 09:23 AM | #4 |
Yorkie mom of 4 Donating YT Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: LaPlata, Md
Posts: 23,247
| Training bonds you so you could start training her tricks and things. Sometimes it seemed like my pups liked someone else more but they ended up being bonded to me. It just might take some time.
__________________ Taylor My babies Joey, Penny ,Ollie & Dixie Callie Mae, you will forever be in my heart! |
09-20-2017, 12:51 PM | #5 |
Donating YT 10K Club Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Alabama
Posts: 17,674
| Hi Monicajean! WELCOME TO YORKIETALK!!! Bless you for adopting this precious little girl. If she had unpleasant experiences with women in her former home - it may take her a while to learn that YOU ARE AWESOME and the best!!! I truly understand the "hurt". Sometimes you just have to bring out the best and most tasty treats and use a bit of good ole fashioned bribery. I would suggest keeping tiny tidbits of her favorite "healthy" treats in your pocket and stashed near where you normally sit. That way when hubby sits her next to you it will be easy to give her a reward - positive reinforcement is always a good place to start with relationship building. |
09-21-2017, 07:19 AM | #6 |
YorkieTalk Newbie! Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: Roseville, CA, US
Posts: 3
| Thank you everyone Will try all of these things. |
09-21-2017, 01:21 PM | #7 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 2014 Location: Canada
Posts: 1,903
| The hurt can be real! I care for my babies, walk, feed, train etc (and luckily they are completely bonded to me). But out of pure jealousy, I know that Scottie prefers to cuddle with my fiance, and I was getting kind of mad in a silly/petty way. I usually go to bed earlier than Fiance does because he starts work later than me. There was a while when Scottie would stare me down...and for a while, I didn't realize why. But then, I figured it out. The second I'd get up to go to bed, he'd steal my spot on the couch and get all comfy snuggling up. He's such a little weasel. He doesn't want to cuddle beside me, or the other side of fiance. He wants MY spot on the couch! Then he looks at me all smug. Fiance kept laughing at me...that it was hilarious cuz I was jealous of my dog. LOL But just to reiterate what others have mentioned - daily training sessions with your baby really does help! Hope things turn around for you soon!
__________________ ~ laughter is an instant vacation ~ https://scottieandcasie.com/ :: Custom Pet Portrait Paintings Last edited by canana; 09-21-2017 at 01:22 PM. |
09-21-2017, 01:31 PM | #8 |
♥ Maximo and Teddy Donating Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Northern Virginia
Posts: 25,041
| Great advice above. I would also add: don't force affection and cuddling. Make sure your pup doesn't feel trapped. Always let her feel like she can choose to walk away. I believe this was key in my boys becoming super affectionate. They do it on their own terms. I often pick them up for just a second, give them a kiss, let them down and say, "Oooh, thank you." They come back for more.
__________________ Kristin, Max and Teddy |
09-23-2017, 12:57 PM | #9 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2015 Location: Wildwood, Florida
Posts: 84
| This really hit home for me. My Penny took to my husband immediately but not to me. I took care of her totally but he was her person. He passed away last year so now all the affection is just for me. I would rather be sharing her though. |
09-26-2017, 05:49 AM | #10 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Delaware
Posts: 2,663
| I remember one year I was hosting thanksgiving dinner at my house. My Brandi had started following my niece everywhere around the house. I actually was really hurt and jealous because Brandi was my velcro baby and only followed me around. Well unbeknowst to me, my niece was feeding her turkey. But the feelings were very real. I didn't realized how deep those feelings were. For some strange reason, I thought feelings such as hurt or jealousy could only be applied to humans hurting you. At least with our furbabies it's not intentional. Last edited by yavenay; 09-26-2017 at 05:50 AM. |
09-26-2017, 05:59 AM | #11 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Nov 2016 Location: Miami, FL
Posts: 156
| I agree with the above comments about training your dog. My Leo was a little shy at first when I brought him home and I started to experiment with treats and trying to show him tricks. Now, he does his tricks and he has a super close knit bond with me. He will risk getting in trouble and squeezes through the gate at the entry of our staircase and comes running as fast as he can into my bedroom just to be with me. It's the cutest thing ever lol! Obviously I cant say for sure that this is what caused the bond to grow or to even happen but I think it definitely helped. He sees me as the "bringer of delicious treats" lol!
__________________ Ely; Mommy to: Baby Leo Mimi Bella |
09-26-2017, 10:15 PM | #12 |
Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Aug 2017 Location: California
Posts: 58
| Awee I am so sorry to say I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!! My baby who just passed, was my WORLD!! He was like a child to me, I was chopped liver to him haha. He preferred my husband over me any moment of the day. He loved me but NOT like he did my husband. I gave myself to him and he gave himself to my husband. It was hard but eventually I got over it and still loved him more than the world. He loved me so much but he just wanted to be near my husband when my husband was home. It was their thing. You will eventually get used to it, just keep loving her how you want to. Eventually he got to where he still loved my husband a ton and wanted to be near him but I felt his love as well. We had a mommy son bond and my husband and him had a best friend forever bond. |
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