:thumbup::thumbup:

Amen!

I can see Her point. I would have been offended in Her situation too.

I can too, especially in her current emotional state noone should have to deal with that. I never thought her posts looked unusual and troll-like. The loss of her pup was still fresh when she came here looking for answers, and that came through in her posts. I'm sorry that some people felt the need to tear this person down in her time of need. I read the very ugly comments before they were removed and was completely shocked and disappointed- there is no excuse for it. Tikidog I hope that you realize that the few who judge you do not even come close to the amount of us who support you. Please know that YT will always be open to you and we hope to see you again. tc

:thumbup:

Cindy, I really hope that after you've had a chance to catch your breath a little and the pain is not so fresh, that you'll come back. Please know that 99.9% of the members here are very kind and have the best of intentions. There is no excuse for those that attacked you and I'm so sorry for that, especially at this painful time:unlove: If you don't decide to rejoin us, then I wish you and your little Sadi well and I hope that in time, your heart will heal and you won't blame yourself anymore for something that you didn't know.

HUGS!!!!!!

Cindy - I know you requested no PMs. But I hope you'll read a PM I just sent you.

They are talking about the breaks you took because most people would just walk away from the computer and not post the message until they could come back and finish typing it that's all. Most people will not remember after a year what you posted a year ago. I am sorry you feel you have to leave. There are people in the world who don't always say what we want to hear or come off as mean and uncaring and its just best to ignore that no matter how hard and just try to focus on all of the nice and caring people who tried to help you. Again I am sorry for your loss.

I think sometimes people in general seem to think about the negative more then the positive.

I hope you stay because you received alot of care and compassion from alot of people. One thing I have learned in life is I cant control what all people think of me or say about me. You are grieving so I know you are sensitive but I hope you will reread all of the posts and see how much support you had. Dont let the comments of a couple of people make you feel you must leave

This makes me so very sad.:(

Absolutely. This OP had more support than not.

However, I know I cannot control whether she chooses to leave or stay so I will have to let it go.

Cindy, I'm very sad you had to experience such a negative situation when you came here. I can completely understand how you could be embarrassed, I would be too. I don’t understand why people are so skeptical anymore. I think it may be “blame the victim” phenomena, if we can blame the victim, we can tell ourselves that would never happen to us. I’m sure you’ll be experiencing many raw emotions in the next few days, and I hope you don’t make any decisions now. I, for one, would really like to know you better, there are so many wonderful people here, and truthfully, it’s a wonderful resource for learning to care for the Yorkie. Give your heart a chance to heal. I just want to add that you have been amazing gracious throughout this whole ordeal.

Cindy, I’m so sorry about the loss of your precious Tiki. Having lost two of my own babies too soon I know the drive / need for answers and the grief and pain that can follow an unexpected death ,it can be a pretty lonely place. As hard as it may be to admit, sometimes the answers we get still don't relieve the heartache. We must remember as well that not everything is in our control. We might like to think it is, hope that it is, but there are times it simply isn't…


Your coming here for comfort, compassion and support was perfectly understandable. I’m sorry if you feel you didn’t get that…..Realize that you do not need anyone else's approval to mourn the loss of your pet, nor must you justify your feelings to anyone and that not everyone will always come through in the way we expect….Just know the joy found in the companionship of a pet is a blessing not given to everyone. The power of the love and companionship they provide to us and yet asking for nothing in return is a blessing we all should cherish. I wish you all the best and I hope down the road your memories of Tiki will bring you comfort ….RIP Tiki……..

Just a sad way for YT to come across.

Cindy I am very sorry for your loss. I am glad you did get a lot of compassion and good advise and apologize for the few who were unkind. I know that even though there was plenty of support the few bad eggs makes us all stink. When your hurting the smallest amount of negativity will hurt more than it would normally.

Thoughts and prayers for your healing and all my good wishes for you, your husband and your little girl.

I'm quite sure at this point that the OP is not reading this thread anymore and I can't blame her. I would be hurt by the rude insulting comments that were made here as well. What makes it doubly hurtful is the fact that the woman was writing about a very recent and painful loss.

We have all seen other new people come to YT and get pounced on by people who feel they have the right to chastise a person who does not have their knowledge base or life experience. This forum is a wonderful resource for new Yorkie owners as well as for the more experienced owner, but what use is that information when the newbie comes to YT with a question or comment and is immediately lambasted for saying something that does not agree with the current information that the more knowledgeable and experienced person may have? It is possible to inform people without being rude. As a matter of fact a person is more likely to accept instruction if you don't give it to them with a baseball bat!

I understand that some people may need a good talking to when they are abusive or just refuse to accept common sense advice but lets give them a chance. I have seen people write one comment or question and never be heard from again because of the rude answers they receive.

The person who started this thread was not even the least bit rude but some people did not like her writing style. Imagine! Insulting and rejecting an entry because you don't like the writing style! Maybe you belong on a totally different forum if you can be so heartless as to insult a person who has just lost their beloved pet because you don't like the way they write! Oh, you think she is a troll! Well, what if you are wrong and have deeply hurt someone who is grieving? Is it worth it just so you can show what a smart person you are and how sarcastic and mean you can be?

I have concern for the people and the their animals that have been driven off this forum before they got the information they needed. Many people are quite ignorant about the dog world and Yorkies in particular. Every opportunity that the people of YT are given to educate people should be taken advantage of and not used as a chance to bash or attack someone because of their lack of knowledge. I think we all need to take a step back and polish our communication skills when dealing with people we find different than ourselves. I say "we" because I include myself. If we are having a bad day then maybe it is not the time to write a reply to someone that rubs us the wrong way.

I know that the majority of responses here were kind and compassionate but it only takes one cutting remark to cancel that out.....especially for a new person. Not everyone is thick skinned and not everyone is used to the type of thing that happens on some forums. I have the feeling that the person that stared this thread was not a forum type of person. I know most of you feel as bad about this as I do. This whole thing just left me feeling sick.

I first want to say that I am so sorry for your lost. It must be very painful and shocking to lose a beloved pet suddenly. I find that some members here are a little harsh but it is only a few. People come here for a kind word ,respectful advise and compassion. I read so many times where people are blamed and fussed at regarding the lack of immediate vet care and accused of being unfit doggie parents. I know that some people here feel they are giving the helpless animals a voice but the voices are sometimes a little mean. Just as we have compassion for our fur creatures, we should have compassion for our fellow members. Yes pet ownership is a serious responsibility and sometimes financial sacrifices will need to be made. I just wish people will cease being so judgmental and mean. No this forum can't replace an expert vet visit but sometimes a person is only seeking a sounding board. Actually as some of people have experienced, vets aren't always right either. Some members here bash dog foods too, but in truth we all know that there is no perfect dog food. What works for my pets may not work for your pets. We can only give our views and experiences.

Let's remember, this is true for ALL animals, not just people! :) Negative stimulus is much more powerful than positive stimulus, which makes sense when you think about how the world works. We have to learn fast to avoid things that hurt us.

It's just a fact that if someone posts something and get lots of nice responses and a few negative ones... they will probably focus on the negative ones. That's one of the reasons why internet dicussions spin out of control so much more real life ones do.

It takes practice to learn how to get feedback on an internet forum, and someone new to the experience or in a vulnerable place will have an especially hard time doing that.

To the OP, I do hope you will reconsider and stay. There are a lot of great people here and a lot of great information. I think people will support you in the future if you come back.

Great post.

I just wanted to offer my condolences. I cannot give any suggestions or offer any answers, but I am very sorry for your loss.

good job
 

TraciG you said it just right.I am a newby to this site. I believe people that say nasty,hurtful things should be blocked , they can spread that kind of garbage elsewhere, I am also a new yorkie mom & glad to find this site. BUT that kind of thing is the reason I don't go to chat rooms & sites:aimeeyork like this. I was very disappointed to see this kind of behavior in my first week. But I also saw the wonderful caring ladies & I will hang around. Great New Year to All!!!

I think thats why the world can seem like a negative place we need to get more positive :)

I am very sad right now, not only for you and the loss of your dear dog, but for the behavior of some members of this community. So uncalled for, unnecessary and downright rude. I for one am flabbergasted, somewhat speechless, although I'm sorry I had to speak up this time, why treat a new member so poorly? I may not be able to forgive those that spoke out of line, I know I will never forget.
Please accept my condolences for your loss of Tiki, may he rest in peaceful sleep.
I do hope time will heal the pain you're feeling now, and all that will be left is the sweet memories of your precious boy, Tiki. Keep them close to your heart and cherish them forever, for there will never be another like him. I know this because I tried to replace Spencer with Winston...they are as different as night and day, and I love and treasure them both for their uniqueness. I don't know if you will ever consider coming back to YT, but I pray you do. Peace to you and hugs! As Ever, Kathy

Cindy,
I'm truly sorry about your negative experience on this forum. There is no excuse for it.

I like your writing style, and thought nothing of your need to take breaks. Your initial posts were being held up through moderation anyway, so it was no big deal. Your responses were always respectful and gracious, and would set a good example for members here.

I enjoyed reading your story about Tiki... I know he'll be greatly missed. Thankyou for sharing with us.

I do hope you will reconsider your decision whether to stay or not, but I do understand if you choose not to reconsider.

RIP Tiki.

Hugs to you and your DH,
Kathy

I'm so sorry for the loss of your little one...it must be so hard to try and come to grips with it being so sudden.
RIP Tiki.

I also am saddened at how this thread had turned..I had only seen someone hurting from a loss. I have typed so many things and just erased them..I really am at a loss for words.

Like!!

If she is still here it will take her a while to ever post again. I am hoping that she will take some time to grieve and then spend some time in the library here. I have been to Belize and I got the impression that there wasnt the medical help there that there is here in the states.
Those of you that were so kind,I am hoping that she will simply contact each of you to ask questions until she feels that she can post in the forum.

Such a sad thing all the way around.

I certainly hope she hasn't left us. I feel really good to read that so many of us feel the same way. This is a wonderful and informative forum. I am learning so much each time I come here. I bought books and I go online to research yorkies but this doesn't compare to actual experiences and advise our members provide. I definitely agree that we should think about what we post especially if we are having a bad day. I guess that's why its suggested to never send emails while angry. To any new members, the positive here out weighs the negative. Please stay because we all need the information and support we get here.

I think this thread really showed the true character of the members on YT. I really hope that you have not been scared away from our wonderful forum Cindy! Not all members are like that and we truly are here to help and support, not cause an upset like one member seems to enjoy doing.