Am I doing the right thing? - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

stingraylady · 08-03-2010, 05:44 AM

Mon, Wed and Thurs look like they are your only long days. Perhaps Emmett could stay with your mom those days and home with you the other days. Then he would have the best of both worlds! If not, maybe a dog walker like Britster suggested. Good luck whatever your decision.

deonk1 · 08-03-2010, 05:56 AM

Best of luck... I feel for you... A situation like this is why I bought Harley.

I came from a horse arena where I owned 5-15 horses at a time. They were my babies my love and my life. I moved 3 hours away to school, and suffered a lot from trying to make things work, and in the end I signed all of mine over to my mother, and my boyfriend bought me Harley.

It is smart to think of the dogs needs, he will probably be upset and stressed in a new home. It will also come down to how you feel. If it's killing you to let him go, before you make a decision think long and hard about the pros and cons of each.

Is it possible to get a new companion for your baby so he's not alone at your house? I leave my Harley while we're at work and he's fine, but he's an only fur child.

Good luck... keep us posted, I don't envy your decision...

yorkieusa · 08-03-2010, 07:31 AM

You are doing the right thing for him. You'll get to see him often. Also, his life won't be disrupted a lot from what he has always known.

kjc · 08-03-2010, 09:52 AM

I think too that leaving him with your Mom is best, as he's in familiar surroundings with friends he knows... that way you won't be worried about him so much and can concentrate on classes... and you do have plenty of time to spend with him on the weekends. Maybe get him accustomed to your apartment, just in case he will ever need to stay there, but that can be done gradually... no pressure... He's still very young... Yorkies can be very adaptable.

Cutie_Emmy · 08-03-2010, 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nana911

I would get him on Fridays and take him back to mom's on Sunday. That way you and he have best of both worlds. Wouldn't be confusing to him at all. They love adventure and change of scenery just as much as we do. He'd have his playmate and granny during the week and his mommy on the three day weekends. What more could a furbaby want?

Heck if you pick him up Thursday night it's a 3 1/2 day split between the two of you so he would be spending the same amount of time with you as your mom. You wouldn't be 'giving' up anything at all!

That is a wonderful idea, and I will try to do this. Thank you all for your help and support, this has been hard for me.

Ringo1 · 08-03-2010, 02:28 PM

I agree that the unselfish decision sounds like the best choice for now. Kudos to you for making that difficult choice!

Remember that movie, The Weatherman with Nicholas Cage? And his father says - in life, usually the right thing to do and the hardest thing to do are one and the same.

I've found that to be so true!

But it will only be for a short time and you can see him on week-ends and some evenings probably. When your situation changes; he can come to live with you full time.

maybeiloveyou · 08-03-2010, 03:45 PM

I think you are making the right choice. Not only will you be away from home but grad school takes up quite a bit of time outside of school as well! I think it would be unfair if he was left alone all day, and then you weren't able to dedicate enough time for him later on (not saying that you will necessarily, but you will be tired when coming home and might not have the time to play with him or take him for walks. Plus you'll have lots of papers to write depending on your field!).

You can definitely visit him on weekends or whenever you have free time during the day. I know it's really tough, I am starting grad school too this fall and will have to be apart from my dog because I just don't see myself having the time to tend to her 24/7.

Cutie_Emmy · 08-08-2010, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by maybeiloveyou

You can definitely visit him on weekends or whenever you have free time during the day. I know it's really tough, I am starting grad school too this fall and will have to be apart from my dog because I just don't see myself having the time to tend to her 24/7.

Thank you ALL for your concern and advice. These last few days have been rough for me. I have been thinking about how I won't have Emmett constantly by my side... and I've been randomly bursting into tears. Two nights ago I even woke myself because I was crying about it in my dreams.

Today after giving Emmett a bath I cried in front of my mom. Big mistake. She yelled at me, actually yelled at me for crying. She accused me of trying to make her feel guilty. Then she made me feel worse talking about how she's cried over me leaving and she was starting to guilt trip me about moving.

Emmett is MINE after all, I can cry if I want to. I guess no one around me really understands how I feel. Emmett is my BABY, and even if I get to have hime some weekends it just won't be the same.

Now I'm crying again.

Sorry for being a downer guys.

nana911 · 08-08-2010, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cutie_Emmy

Thank you ALL for your concern and advice. These last few days have been rough for me. I have been thinking about how I won't have Emmett constantly by my side... and I've been randomly bursting into tears. Two nights ago I even woke myself because I was crying about it in my dreams.

Today after giving Emmett a bath I cried in front of my mom. Big mistake. She yelled at me, actually yelled at me for crying. She accused me of trying to make her feel guilty. Then she made me feel worse talking about how she's cried over me leaving and she was starting to guilt trip me about moving.

Emmett is MINE after all, I can cry if I want to. I guess no one around me really understands how I feel. Emmett is my BABY, and even if I get to have hime some weekends it just won't be the same.

Now I'm crying again.

Sorry for being a downer guys.

She might be yelling to keep from crying. Sometimes moms do things that make us feel better at the time, at the expense of our kids feelings. Doesn't make it right, but it is an explanation. She is feeling a lot of different things about you going to college. HER baby is growing up and leaving. It isn't so much you putting her on a guilt trip as she just doesn't know what to do with all the emotions she has about all the changes she's going through, anymore than you do. Have pity on her. You're both going to be soaking your pillows.

Kinda like when our kids miss the bus home and for a few panicked moments we don't know where they are and when we find them we shake and yell at them "Don't ever do that again", then cry and hug them, then yell again.... we yell because we're angry because we were scared to death. Our emotions get all mixed up, but doesn't stop us from scaring the crap out of and yelling at the kids. Don't care what the kids think or feel, we do what we do to make ourselves feel better at the moment. So, take that into account and let it go...... moms aren't perfect... it will be okay....eventually...LOL

AbbysMom08 · 08-08-2010, 08:53 PM

I'm sorry you are going through this.
I know it's difficult for some people to understand the strong bond we have with our furbabies.
He will always be your baby and I hope that you get things worked out so you have him with you more than not.
Please take care and I'll keep you in my prayers.
Please keep us posted.

08-03-2010, 05:44 AM	#16
stingraylady I found Yorkie love Donating Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Guelph, Ontario, Canada Posts: 1,488	Mon, Wed and Thurs look like they are your only long days. Perhaps Emmett could stay with your mom those days and home with you the other days. Then he would have the best of both worlds! If not, maybe a dog walker like Britster suggested. Good luck whatever your decision. __________________ Cathy www.furbabyfashionhouse.ca Handmade clothing for your furboys and furgirls.

08-03-2010, 05:56 AM	#17
deonk1 YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Winnipeg, MB, Canada Posts: 1,795	Best of luck... I feel for you... A situation like this is why I bought Harley. I came from a horse arena where I owned 5-15 horses at a time. They were my babies my love and my life. I moved 3 hours away to school, and suffered a lot from trying to make things work, and in the end I signed all of mine over to my mother, and my boyfriend bought me Harley. It is smart to think of the dogs needs, he will probably be upset and stressed in a new home. It will also come down to how you feel. If it's killing you to let him go, before you make a decision think long and hard about the pros and cons of each. Is it possible to get a new companion for your baby so he's not alone at your house? I leave my Harley while we're at work and he's fine, but he's an only fur child. Good luck... keep us posted, I don't envy your decision... __________________ Kendra Harley, you were the light in my life, rest peacefully my love!

08-03-2010, 07:31 AM	#18
yorkieusa Crazy about Kacee! Donating Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 21,173	You are doing the right thing for him. You'll get to see him often. Also, his life won't be disrupted a lot from what he has always known. __________________ Karen Kacee Muffin 1991-2005 Rest in Peace My Little Angel

08-03-2010, 09:52 AM	#19
kjc I♥PeekTinkySaph&Finny Donating Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Baltimore, Maryland Posts: 18,872	I think too that leaving him with your Mom is best, as he's in familiar surroundings with friends he knows... that way you won't be worried about him so much and can concentrate on classes... and you do have plenty of time to spend with him on the weekends. Maybe get him accustomed to your apartment, just in case he will ever need to stay there, but that can be done gradually... no pressure... He's still very young... Yorkies can be very adaptable. __________________ Kat Chloe Lizzy PeekABooTinkerbell SapphireInfinity

08-03-2010, 02:28 PM	#21
Ringo1 Ringo (1) and Lucy too! Donating Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: On the Edge of Glory Posts: 3,447	I agree that the unselfish decision sounds like the best choice for now. Kudos to you for making that difficult choice! Remember that movie, The Weatherman with Nicholas Cage? And his father says - in life, usually the right thing to do and the hardest thing to do are one and the same. I've found that to be so true! But it will only be for a short time and you can see him on week-ends and some evenings probably. When your situation changes; he can come to live with you full time. __________________ Mommy to Lucy, Ringo, and Matthew

08-03-2010, 03:45 PM	#22
maybeiloveyou YT Addict Join Date: May 2007 Location: Southern California Posts: 257	I think you are making the right choice. Not only will you be away from home but grad school takes up quite a bit of time outside of school as well! I think it would be unfair if he was left alone all day, and then you weren't able to dedicate enough time for him later on (not saying that you will necessarily, but you will be tired when coming home and might not have the time to play with him or take him for walks. Plus you'll have lots of papers to write depending on your field!). You can definitely visit him on weekends or whenever you have free time during the day. I know it's really tough, I am starting grad school too this fall and will have to be apart from my dog because I just don't see myself having the time to tend to her 24/7.

08-08-2010, 08:53 PM	#25
AbbysMom08 Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Illinois Posts: 2,268	I'm sorry you are going through this. I know it's difficult for some people to understand the strong bond we have with our furbabies. He will always be your baby and I hope that you get things worked out so you have him with you more than not. Please take care and I'll keep you in my prayers. Please keep us posted. __________________ Jan, Mommy to Abby