It feels like she doesn't care about me - Page 2 - YorkieTalk.com Forums

LondonsMom · 06-10-2009, 03:30 PM

I've always treated and disciplined my dogs like I would children. We raise our children to be self confident and trusting of our decisions where they are concerned. When my daughter was small and I had to take her to a babysitter it would have ruined my entire day if she cried and screamed every time I left her. Instead she was happy to be there with other kids and loved the baby sitter, but she was always glad when I arrived to pick her up. I really don't think that meant she didn't love me. I think it meant she trusted me and knew I would be returning for her.

My golden would sit in the corner when she was in trouble, sometimes before I knew she had done anything! She did have a habit of "telling on herself" I miss her.

If you left your dog and he or she cried and barked the entire time you were gone that wouldn't be healthy for the pet or easy for you. My little London (Yorkie) can fall asleep anywhere, it's kind of strange but at least I know she is comfortable and not anxious, which is unusual for a puppy mill momma.

Yorkies do have the characteristics of the breed but each has their own personality too. It's our jobs as their parents to understand them and help them with anything that might be wrong, just like human kids.

Your little one loves and trusts you!! Count your blessings!! and Congrats!!
This forum is great! It's nice to be able to "talk" to others and get feedback. Hope we all encouraged you.

yorkiepuppie · 06-10-2009, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LondonsMom

I've always treated and disciplined my dogs like I would children. We raise our children to be self confident and trusting of our decisions where they are concerned. When my daughter was small and I had to take her to a babysitter it would have ruined my entire day if she cried and screamed every time I left her. Instead she was happy to be there with other kids and loved the baby sitter, but she was always glad when I arrived to pick her up. I really don't think that meant she didn't love me. I think it meant she trusted me and knew I would be returning for her.

My golden would sit in the corner when she was in trouble, sometimes before I knew she had done anything! She did have a habit of "telling on herself" I miss her.

If you left your dog and he or she cried and barked the entire time you were gone that wouldn't be healthy for the pet or easy for you. My little London (Yorkie) can fall asleep anywhere, it's kind of strange but at least I know she is comfortable and not anxious, which is unusual for a puppy mill momma.

Yorkies do have the characteristics of the breed but each has their own personality too. It's our jobs as their parents to understand them and help them with anything that might be wrong, just like human kids.

Your little one loves and trusts you!! Count your blessings!! and Congrats!!
This forum is great! It's nice to be able to "talk" to others and get feedback. Hope we all encouraged you.

that is so cute!

Nancy1999 · 06-10-2009, 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yorkiepuppie

your baby loves you, she is just more independent

i also think it's kind of cute when the puppy cries if you are gone, but at the same time, it's heart breaking.

my friend had to leave her dog with me for a week when she needed to be out of the country. her dog did really well and didn't cry or anything.

maybe you can be happy that your dog is so independent and well-adjusted happy dog.

milu is very clingy. and while it is kind of cute, it is really stressful. i feel guilty leaving her at all, and i also feel really stressed when i can't take her everywhere with me.

I agree, I hate the fact that Joey acts unhappy while I'm gone, his daddy takes him for walks, and tries to distract him when I go out, but I guess sometimes he whines and carries on. He goes nuts when I come home, even though I've do what the experts say and ignore him for the first few minutes. I'm probably not real consistent with this, but if I give him too much attention right away, he acts like he choking. I think you are lucky!

yorkiepuppie · 06-10-2009, 04:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nancy1999

I agree, I hate the fact that Joey acts unhappy while I'm gone, his daddy takes him for walks, and tries to distract him when I go out, but I guess sometimes he whines and carries on. He goes nuts when I come home, even though I've do what the experts say and ignore him for the first few minutes. I'm probably not real consistent with this, but if I give him too much attention right away, he acts like he choking. I think you are lucky!

omg!!! how can you calmly ignore him for the first few minutes when he is giving you the happy welcome home mommy wiggly body/tail!?!?!?

i go NUTS when i come home and milu greets me, i go even crazier than her sometimes! i am so happy to see her. LOL

it's hard in both situations. my friend who's dog is happy and well adjusted, wishes her dog was more clingy and says that it hurts her feelings when the dog didn't act like she missed her. it's hard for us with the clingy babies too, because feeling so guilty and attached to our babies.

but the most important thing is having a happy dog. and i think we all have pretty darn spoiled little happy dogs!

yorkiepuppie · 06-10-2009, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nancy1999

I agree, I hate the fact that Joey acts unhappy while I'm gone, his daddy takes him for walks, and tries to distract him when I go out, but I guess sometimes he whines and carries on. He goes nuts when I come home, even though I've do what the experts say and ignore him for the first few minutes. I'm probably not real consistent with this, but if I give him too much attention right away, he acts like he choking. I think you are lucky!

ah, i c. you can't give him too much attention right away because then he will be choking with excitement... well, i usually run around the room when i am really excited to see milu. and she runs around the room with me too. maybe you can try that?

(if you don't mind your hubby thinking that you've completely lost your mind)

AprilLove · 06-10-2009, 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FlDebra

Maybe she is just so sure of your love she knows you will always come back! Sounds like you are getting all the love and attention when you are there, so I think she just knows you will be back for her -- she trusts you!

4doggiemama · 06-10-2009, 05:07 PM

Wish mine wouldn't whimper and bark.

postalmom1987 · 06-10-2009, 05:20 PM

"omg!!! how can you calmly ignore him for the first few minutes when he is giving you the happy welcome home mommy wiggly body/tail!?!?!?

i go NUTS when i come home and milu greets me, i go even crazier than her sometimes! i am so happy to see her. LOL

"

Oh me too. I'm crazier than my Krystal. And if she doesn't offer me her belly to pet, I act even crazier so she will. I miss her soooooo much at work. But I know she loves me.

Nancy1999 · 06-10-2009, 06:40 PM

Well, I can't really ignore him, but if I act excited he starts the hacking choking thing, so this really concerned me, and I read you must ignore them until they settles down, and then you can give them attention. This works, but it was too hard for me to do. I've compromised, we have sort of a routine, where he runs up some steps and gives me a kiss while I'm sitting on the steps, if I get up pretty fast and go into the kitchen and tell him to sit and give him a treat, he can avoid the choking. However, if I sit there for very long - 30 seconds - he sounds like he's going to die.

QuickSilver · 06-10-2009, 08:19 PM

I had a similar problem, I guess. A lot of people here talk about how their yorkies can tell when they are feeling the slightest bit upset or under the weather. Thor, on the other hand, will fall asleep on my lap whether I am laughing, crying, or having a stroke. It sort of bothered me until a friend pointed out that just means he's really comfortable with me. I would love to think that's what it is because poor Thor is a nervous little guy.

Thor does whimper sometimes when I leave, but usually that's if he's not sure about where he's being left. He's pretty chill when he greets me, sometimes he won't even get up off his bed. That doesn't bother me though, we spend so much time together, I guess he's not that surprised to see me come back.

miabellaamoure · 06-10-2009, 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Conjure_Girl

Yorkshire Terriers are considered more independent breed than many other dogs, for instance toy poodles. Also, she is a female, and female dogs tend to bond more with male humans (and male puppies with females).

What I am saying is just an explanation to her behavior, but I don't mean that she doesn't love you. As someone said in another post, i think it means that she's a well balanced dog and she knows you got her beck. It's much better than if she would growl and bark at anyone who tries to come close to you because she is so territorial, lacking confidence, and attached to you.

My Lulu is the same. She follows me all day long like a little shadow, and I know she loves me dearly. But when someone else comes over, or if we pass people on the street (especially kids) she wants to jump on them, play with them, and lick 'em like there's no tomorrow. When we have guests over, she wants to hang out with them and doesn't even try to come over to me. But it makes me happy, and gives me a little break too...

Your dog loves you in a healthy way.... It's a beautiful thing!!!!

Conjure_Girl said it all perfectly...however, all dogs are different and just like humans I think that even dogs can sometimes just click with one person or feel so secure with another that they don't display anxiety upon separation.

The latter is something to be thankful for. I have both types of Yorkies...Abby & Bella are very independent and carefree. They are always happy to be with whomever is loving on them...yet, my Phoebe is "my" shadow where 99% of the time that's fine but, there are moments when we must detach...like for a potty-break...an I'm talking about for me...lol!

I wouldn't worry...you're doing a great job & your lil' one just seems to be partial to the men crowd!

yorkie mad · 06-10-2009, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by roxies_mom

Who is home more? You are your hubby? I'm the one who is home with Roxie most all day everyday, when hubby comes home she is all over him and follows him all over. If we're outside and I am going back inside she won't come with me unless he does too. The wierd thing is that if he's home and I leave she runs to my closet and sleeps on my shoes and will only come out for a little bit. I agree with the others that your baby knows your love is unconditional. Kind of reminds me of kids who only see mom or dad on a given weekend. They give that parent tons of love and attention because it's the only time they have. The parent they live with is always there for them, it's unconditional.

Yes I am the one home most of the day , I see your point.

Quote:

Originally Posted by miabellaamoure

Conjure_Girl said it all perfectly...however, all dogs are different and just like humans I think that even dogs can sometimes just click with one person or feel so secure with another that they don't display anxiety upon separation.

The latter is something to be thankful for. I have both types of Yorkies...Abby & Bella are very independent and carefree. They are always happy to be with whomever is loving on them...yet, my Phoebe is "my" shadow where 99% of the time that's fine but, there are moments when we must detach...like for a potty-break...an I'm talking about for me...lol!

I wouldn't worry...you're doing a great job & your lil' one just seems to be partial to the men crowd!

I must admit I did feel silly talking about this to you guys but it was really starting to get me down.
I'm glad she gets worried about my DH as I know he is secretly pleased as it was a big deal Tia coming to our family as we lost our border collie Jessie a few months ago and she was a big part of us for 14 years.
Now I feel confident I can talk to you about anything.

BebeGirl · 06-11-2009, 12:08 PM

You're lucky she cuddles with you, my Toby doesn't even do that

Quote:

Originally Posted by yorkie mad

Some could call it independence, i say she just doesn't care , The thing is I could leave her with anyone and I know she won't mind.
I notice it when I take her to my mum and dads house , I would use the loo and come down and say "has she missed me", no I don't think she realized you were gone was the reply.

It happens when DH and me are out ,and he has to go get drinks from the pub or toilet or something she cries and cries till he gets back, which I think is real cute, but she NEVER cries if I have to do the same.Not a blinking whimper!

In fact she won't move away from the car until he has locked it and walks with us.
Tonight was another good example, on the way home from puppy classes I asked my sister to hold her leash while I popped into the chippy,on return I asked did she wimper for me, you guessed it NO.

The biggest upset of all was when we checked out some boarding kennels and the lady held her while we walked around and she fell asleep in her arms.

When at home she will follow me everywhere, bathroom, toilet , you name it she won't let me out of her sight.

Its always me she wants to cuddle on the couch ,and I know she loves me but why won't she cry for me?I just want to know that she misses me.

06-10-2009, 03:30 PM	#16
LondonsMom Yorkie Yakker Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Indiana Posts: 26	Just my 2 cents I've always treated and disciplined my dogs like I would children. We raise our children to be self confident and trusting of our decisions where they are concerned. When my daughter was small and I had to take her to a babysitter it would have ruined my entire day if she cried and screamed every time I left her. Instead she was happy to be there with other kids and loved the baby sitter, but she was always glad when I arrived to pick her up. I really don't think that meant she didn't love me. I think it meant she trusted me and knew I would be returning for her. My golden would sit in the corner when she was in trouble, sometimes before I knew she had done anything! She did have a habit of "telling on herself" I miss her. If you left your dog and he or she cried and barked the entire time you were gone that wouldn't be healthy for the pet or easy for you. My little London (Yorkie) can fall asleep anywhere, it's kind of strange but at least I know she is comfortable and not anxious, which is unusual for a puppy mill momma. Yorkies do have the characteristics of the breed but each has their own personality too. It's our jobs as their parents to understand them and help them with anything that might be wrong, just like human kids. Your little one loves and trusts you!! Count your blessings!! and Congrats!! This forum is great! It's nice to be able to "talk" to others and get feedback. Hope we all encouraged you.

06-10-2009, 05:07 PM	#22
4doggiemama Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: KS Posts: 3,290	Wish mine wouldn't whimper and bark. __________________ Joanne Eli ChipperEva Snowboy Rosie(R.I.P. 1996-July 29, 2013) Cocoa(R.I.P 1998-April 26, 2012):

06-10-2009, 06:40 PM	#24
Nancy1999 I ♥ Joey & Ralphie! Donating Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 25,396 Blog Entries: 2	Well, I can't really ignore him, but if I act excited he starts the hacking choking thing, so this really concerned me, and I read you must ignore them until they settles down, and then you can give them attention. This works, but it was too hard for me to do. I've compromised, we have sort of a routine, where he runs up some steps and gives me a kiss while I'm sitting on the steps, if I get up pretty fast and go into the kitchen and tell him to sit and give him a treat, he can avoid the choking. However, if I sit there for very long - 30 seconds - he sounds like he's going to die. __________________ NancyJoey Proud members of the CrAzYcLuB and YAP! ** Just Say No to Puppymills – Join YAP! Yorkshire Terrier Club of America – Breeder Referrals

06-10-2009, 08:19 PM	#25
QuickSilver Thor's Human Donating Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: San Francisco, CA Posts: 5,929 Blog Entries: 31	I had a similar problem, I guess. A lot of people here talk about how their yorkies can tell when they are feeling the slightest bit upset or under the weather. Thor, on the other hand, will fall asleep on my lap whether I am laughing, crying, or having a stroke. It sort of bothered me until a friend pointed out that just means he's really comfortable with me. I would love to think that's what it is because poor Thor is a nervous little guy. Thor does whimper sometimes when I leave, but usually that's if he's not sure about where he's being left. He's pretty chill when he greets me, sometimes he won't even get up off his bed. That doesn't bother me though, we spend so much time together, I guess he's not that surprised to see me come back. __________________ If you love something, set it free. Unless it's an angry tiger.

06-10-2009, 05:20 PM	#23
postalmom1987 Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: vacaville ca usa Posts: 235	"omg!!! how can you calmly ignore him for the first few minutes when he is giving you the happy welcome home mommy wiggly body/tail!?!?!? i go NUTS when i come home and milu greets me, i go even crazier than her sometimes! i am so happy to see her. LOL " Oh me too. I'm crazier than my Krystal. And if she doesn't offer me her belly to pet, I act even crazier so she will. I miss her soooooo much at work. But I know she loves me.