I need some advice please

[cariblonde]

I may be moving into an apartment in 2 weeks.. Applied today and paid 50.00 application fee I am movng to get out of the house my husband and I lived in our entire marriage plus I will be a lot closer to work, here is the problem i got this new job making more money but I will be paying rent for the first time so the extra money will be going to rent.. I currently pay next to nothing b/c the house we lived in belongs to my mom (who lives elsewhere) and is paid for...Everyone is telling me Im making a mistake. They are all like why move from a house with a yard to an apartment where you will be paying double what your used to.. What do you guys think, I want a fresh start and its hard on me to still live here and sleep in the same bed/bedroom and i know moving will give me the fresh start I need

[Patti]

That's a tough one. If you can think a year or two down the road and it may be easier with time to stay at the house. In the current economy I would try to stay in the house that cost's hardly anything. but you have to make the decision and live where you feel comfortable. Good luck in your decision

[mminichan]

Hmm..it is a tough one. With today economy, I would stay...stay at your current house. Good luck!

[SladesMommy]

I think a fresh start would probably be good.

What are you going to do with the house? If at all possible I would hang onto it for a few months, just in case you change your mind.

[Wylie's Mom]

I think it's so rare to have an almost free place to live - *what* a luxury. Especially given the fact that you are breaking out on your own. I completely feel for you in terms of the memories the place has for you. But, if it were me - I'd stay there, I'd take a couple months worth of rent - and re-paint, buy some fresh stuff - re-do the bedroom. Somehow, make it *just* your own. And, save all that rent money down the road.

[TyraandMrJ]

With the extra job or better paying job, I'd go buy new furntuire,paint and drapes and change bedrooms. If there's a second bedroom. grab that one and make it yours. and take the master bedroom and make it a office/sewing room. In the long run,my clothes and stuff and all out everything goes, I'd stay where I was at. and just go nuts and redo the house. LOL apartment after living in a house can be rough. tyty

[SladesMommy]

Actually the re-doing the house does sound more appealing than paying rent! Thats probably what I would do.

[Little Bit]

I was thinking the same thing! Use the extra money to renovate the house and GET A NEW BED! You can make it seem like a brand new place if you change things around. I think you would be better off in the long run to stay where you are.

[YorkichonBella]

It is a tough decision! I had the same decision to make with my first marriage. At the time, because of my daughter, I chose to stay in the house. I felt the same way as you & wished for a fresh start.....that's what he was doing. right? It was a struggle to keep up a house alone. But, with you & it being your Mom's house, this could make it so much easier for you financially right now. Possibly redo things to look totally different. You'll have the chance to sell furniture, buy new things, change colors & totally redecorate if you want to make the place look like a fresh start! I wish you the very best!

[cariblonde]

thanks everyone, I did think of renovating but the problem with that is it is my moms house so Im very limited in what I can do..Im not sure yet what to do I feel so torn, my son wants to move (mostly because the apartments has 2 pools, tennis court, playground ) thats all he's thinking about, he will have to change schools and he understands that. Also living in the city is very appealing to me, right now I live about 15-20 minutes from Wilmington so I pay a lot in gas and put a lot of miles on my car to go to work, I hate yard work and living in the country.. Plus the aprtment has a fenced in dog run for Gizzie This is such a hard decision for me

[nvnvgirl]

Personally, I wouldn't move. I'd get rid of the bed and buy a nice new one with all new linens. And I'd redecorate the way you want things to be so they don't remind you of the past. I'm sorry. Im so jaded, but it's crazy to leave the great place you're in now b/c of a stupid man. WHY let him make your life more uncomfortable???? I'd just erase as much of him from there as possible and go on and live a really happy life. You're a beautiful girl, and the best revenge is always living a good life. Oh...and if you really want to move, you can take some time to save up money while you make your plans.

[yorkiegirl83]

If the savings in gas is equal to what you'd have to pay extra to get the new apartment, I think it's fine, since it's basically breaking even.

But with starting a new job and never knowing how it's going to work out, maybe you should wait just a few months to see if you really enjoy the new job and how it's going before paying so much additional in rent.

Also, what are your goals for the future? Do you want to buy a home at some point? If so, you could be utilizing the lower rent you have now and saving for a nice downpayment on a home you could own with the better paying job you have.

[blueeyes_jd]

Originally Posted by cariblonde

thanks everyone, I did think of renovating but the problem with that is it is my moms house so Im very limited in what I can do..Im not sure yet what to do I feel so torn, my son wants to move (mostly because the apartments has 2 pools, tennis court, playground ) thats all he's thinking about, he will have to change schools and he understands that. Also living in the city is very appealing to me, right now I live about 15-20 minutes from Wilmington so I pay a lot in gas and put a lot of miles on my car to go to work, I hate yard work and living in the country.. Plus the aprtment has a fenced in dog run for Gizzie This is such a hard decision for me

jmho but it sounds like you have already made the decision... I think you should take the new life! it would be good for both you and your son to have the diff. distractions! I think it would be nice if you could stay at your moms house and renovate the house... but I think you know whats best for you and your son! good luck!

[allisongaines]

personally, i would WANT to move...
but paying so much for an apartment would be difficult..
i understand about the whole sleeping in the same bed you both shared thing..
hmm..... maybe you could try to change your bedroom to another?? just to see if that would ease the pain of living there just enough to make you stay.

[Mom to Hot Rod]

In your other thread, I suggested to "get a fresh start" by getting rid of the old and getting all new furniture and memories, etc. Now seeing that you are in a house that you have no financial issues, I would say stay. Although you cannot renovate the house, maybe get new furnishings and maybe you could paint?

I would say stay and save up money as well as enjoy the calmness of where you live. It is a tough decision with your son involved but I think being able to save some money and enjoy the peace and quiet has a lot of merit. Good luck on whatever you decide.