Separation Anxiety

[SJK1113]

I'm having a real problem with Jake when I go to work. I'm home with him all day, and I play with him alot and he follows me around when I'm doing housework. When he seems me getting ready for work, he starts acting very sad and cries when I'm in the shower. It breaks my heart!!! Fortunately, I rarely have to leave him alone because my son gets home from work right before I get home. My son coming home helps to distract Jake a little, but he still acts sad. My hubby gets home about an hour after I leave, and he's happy again, but my hubby said periodically throughout the evening, Jake will go to the door and cry and mope around for a bit. He tries to distract him by playing, and he's okay for awhile again. The biggest problem is that now he's refusing to eat the whole time I'm gone. This worries me because he's really small and I don't want him going so long without eating.

One of the problems is that I was home with him for 6 mos. when I was sick. I've been back to work since the beginning of April, and I'm not seeing much of a change. The eating thing has just started. What happens is that by the middle of the week, he starts getting more used to me leaving, but then the weekend comes and he has me home again......then, we start all over on Monday. I always leave one of my shirts with him, and my hubby says he has that with him almost the whole evening, dragging it around and playing with it.

What can I do to help him feel better about me leaving? More importantly, how can hubby get him to eat while I'm gone? When I get home, he gobbles his food down like he hasn't eaten in a week. He's very much a mommy's boy, but he loves my hubby and son alot too. He seems to prefer when hubby and me are both home at the same time.

I think I posted this pic before, but it shows how sad he looks. I can't stand it! I swear, I'm gonna retire early!!

[drawlins27]

Bailey was a puppy mill rescue and had a lot of separation anxiety as well. There is some medication you can give them some of which is homeopathic but I prefer behavioral training.
Here are some tips:

You may want to confine him while you are gone. Dogs are den animals by nature. Bailey stays in the Master Bathroom while I am gone. He has his favorite ball, his bed, water, and a pee pad in there. I also will leave a piece of clothing that I have worn in there with him so that he can still smell my scent when I'm gone. This is his safe place.

Vary the amount of time that you are gone. Start out by leaving for short periods such as 1 minute and then gradually increase the length of time you are gone.

Give him cues that you are leaving. Bailey knows that I am leaving when I pick up the car keys. He runs to the Master Bath and crawls into his bed.

Don't make leaving a big deal. Don't fuss over him and draw out the process of leaving. This signals to him that you are worried about leaving as well and will only serve to make his anxieties worse.

Hope some of that helps

[SJK1113]

Thanks! I do make a big deal about leaving. I snuggle him and kiss him and tell him I love him and all that.

I'll start going outside for a minute or two at a time during the day and then come back, taking the keys with me. Maybe if he keeps seeing that I'm going to always come back, he won't be upset. Normally, he goes outside with me all the time. That's good advice! Thanks again!!

[myriamha]

1- ignore him completely 30minutes before you leave the house : dont look at him or touch his toys or food . Same thing when you get back home .
2- Dont be in an anxious state of mind and worried when you are leaving because they can sense that and become more anxious and sad . Just grab you keys and leave .

I went throught a lot with Royce and his separation anxiety and even hired a dog behaviorioust that cost me a fortune and spent hours practicing the exercises that she gave me that helped but didnt cure the problem 100 % .

Now Whenever im leaving and royce comes to the door all what i say is " hey royce stay " in a confident way and get out if he cries i will go back and repeat calmly the same thing and go out after 4 or 5 times he doesnt bother at all when i go out he just goes to sleep I guess he learned that I always come back . And pls dont give medication .
PS : i learned how to be in a cal assertive state of mind by watching Cesar Milan DVD season 1 .

[SJK1113]

Originally Posted by myriamha

1- ignore him completely 30minutes before you leave the house : dont look at him or touch his toys or food . Same thing when you get back home .
2- Dont be in an anxious state of mind and worried when you are leaving because they can sense that and become more anxious and sad . Just grab you keys and leave .

I went throught a lot with Royce and his separation anxiety and even hired a dog behaviorioust that cost me a fortune and spent hours practicing the exercises that she gave me that helped but didnt cure the problem 100 % .

Now Whenever im leaving and royce comes to the door all what i say is " hey royce stay " in a confident way and get out if he cries i will go back and repeat calmly the same thing and go out after 4 or 5 times he doesnt bother at all when i go out he just goes to sleep I guess he learned that I always come back . And pls dont give medication .
PS : i learned how to be in a cal assertive state of mind by watching Cesar Milan DVD season 1 .

Oh man, it will be so hard for me to ignore him when I get home! And no, I would never give him medication for that......maybe for me! lol

[luzangela428]

Maximus has benn this way since he was a puppy and I have tried everything, he is juts one big mush...the site of keys in my hands and he is crying...we've been trying to help him with this by giving him a jerky treat or something that takes his mind off of me leaving as a temporary solve

[Tillys_mom]

I had a lot of problems with Tilly and her separation anxiety. When I start to get ready she begins to shake and most of the time she has an accident on the floor. I know it was all my fault because when we first got her I would rock her like a baby and hand feed her her dog food. Hubby thought I was nuts! The vet gave us some pills to help her. At first it just made her really sleepy and I hated it, then eventually it just didn't seem to help. Her condition also got worse about a month after I had a baby. It wasn't until recently I figured out she was just missing the mommy and Tilly time she was use to. So every evening when hubby and the baby have gone to bed I stay up and we have girl time. She feels like a princess again.

[Anna Banana]

There's a lot of good advice here...I think I'm gonna start using some of these tips so I can stop Wobie's separation anxiety before it gets too serious.