Wow....thank you for posting this because this is exactly what I am talking about. Indirectly (so you don't get reported) comments directly toward someone...

I will now refrain and not say anymore because this post speaks for itself!

They are three ladies that are very compassionate about their love for these furbabies. :) And yes, their advice is golden to many. I personally have had communication with barney107 and LadyJane. So I am speaking from experience. Megansmomma I am not sure if I have or not (other than the raffle) but you have been warned....I have your name now. :D Lol.

This post is totally rude. But, you need to just ignore stuff like that and walk away. There's a big difference between rudeness and so called "bullying".

I do agree with this as well...I love this place and I just wanted people to be aware of the fact that how they say things can be hurtful.....I am respectful to others and I expect the same in return and that is the point I am trying to make.

I think this is true because I have met some wonderful, genuine people on here and I love it and maybe that's why I would like it to be a more respectful forum....

You want this to be a more respectful forum, yet you say you agree with the posts in this thread where people are blatantly rude and disrespectful? So it is only respectful if people agree with everything you say- that is not how internet forums work, sorry.

As far as judgmental, we all make judgments and post accordingly. What exactly do you call bullying? Please post proof that this has occurred.

Kristin,
As you probably know I was not only referring to the thread about the chiropractor but also mine.

I would never want to deter anyone from here and I completely agree that this is a wonderful place and I have learned A LOT.

My point is that no matter how long you are here, no matter what your experiences are, no matter how many dogs you have helped, etc. you should always respond to people (especially who are emotional and freaked out if posting in the S/I forum) with respect and the same goes for the OP.

I don't think it is fair that people responded to me as they did when I completely took the advice from my vet and specialist and am currently doing as they say but yet I got comments that I "ignored advice from 2 vets"...which is 100% untrue!

You, yourself may not agree with the advice given to me from my vet and specialist but I have NEVER gotten a condescending comment from you..nothing but support and just when I think everyone forgot about me I would get a nice comment of support on my page from you which means the world to me!!!! :)

I guess I wish more people would offer words of advice and wisdom but be supportive about the decision that the owner has made~as you do!!

:thumbup:

Megansmomma scared the heck out of me early on. Now I look forward to her posts. Cathy is well trained in debate and lays things out in a very logical way. As for LadyJane, I love, love, love the way her compassion for the dogs is always first and foremost. She speaks for those who don't have a voice.

It's all about interpretation. What one person decides is bullying or mean, the next person finds straight foward and to the point. Personally, I've come to the conclusion that when I post it's not about me but about the dogs. If my feelings get hurt it's only because I allowed them to.

As far as I am concerned, the only one who has the right to tell someone else they are being rude or bullying here is the admin and his designees.

I can only assume that I know the "bullies" that you are talking about and I can also only assume that I could be one of them.

When I post on the sick and injured forum, I'm rarely there to just send well wishes and move on. I'm also not there to agree with everyones' vets. If I think something isn't right, then I have no problem saying so.

I left your thread because I have no more advice for you right now, and even if I did, it is obvious that you won't seriously consider it (you stated this yourself in this thread http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/sic...-vet-said.html). You said just sit back and read. Don't pay much attention, right? You said as long as you and your vet agree, then it's fine. So if you and your vet agree, then why should I take time out of my day to give advice that will be ignored?

When you first posted what the specialist recommended, it did appear as though the first option was their first choice. And even now that I know it wasn't, I still have to say something does not sound right to me. You can do whatever you want with your pup. However, that doesn't mean that you will get support in the form of agreement from all of us.

I don't always go to specialists and I don't always do everything just right, but I also am not going to expect others to agree with me that's it's standard of care because it isn't. Is L/D and Denamarin for another month for no other testing wrong? In my opinion, it is. That is NOT to say that I would not do it, but I cannot agree that this is best. It is simply not what I see as standard of care.

Bullies don't leave threads when they have nothing else to say. And they certainly don't spend countless hours on YT trying to help people. We are busy people and give up time with our own families and pups to help.

It sounds like you are looking for some of us to agree with the decisions that have been made and say that they are okay. That is between you and your vet and you don't need our approval. Simply, I'm uneasy about the plan that has been made for Lucy and I can't say that it's the right thing to do. I can tell you that I think about Lucy often and hope she is okay.

It seems you starting getting upset when some people disagreed about the specialist you had chosen. Whether or not people here agree with the decisions you have made has nothing to do with their respect for you as a person. I don't see any personal attacks whatsoever in that thread.

I am not that sensitive (if I was I would not have posted this for fear of people being mean to me) and I didn't write this just for me. If you look at my thread in S/I you will see that I do defend myself and don't take any crap from anyone and YES I AM A GROWNUP and I function VERY WELL thank you! But snide condescending remarks are uncalled for in the real world and are not necessary. This world is harsh enough we don't need to be harsh on people that don't deserve it.

The biggest issue I have is when people don't read what I write and come to some other conclusion themselves and then accuse me of not taking the advice that I was given when it is 100% UNTRUE.....if people take the time to comment then they should always know what they are commenting about and not take bits and pieces and try to make it sound like something it's not.

Maybe I grew up in a different world but I was taught by my parents to respect people and I do as long as they respect me!

:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup::thumbup:



I think the longer you are around here the easier it is to see this. You have to remember what some of these people have seen. LJ has seen more things than we can even begin to believe. You have to place your self in their position to understand why they are so passionate when they post. You can not allow your feelings to stand in the way. They are telling you what they THINK is in the best interest of the pup. Right or wrong, it is what they are giving for advice.

We also have to remember some of these posts, in my opinion, have been designed to "set up" YT members.

Again speaking personally, I love my vet and I think he is one of the best. However, he is not just a Yorkie vet. Many of these people have seen things that relate to Yorkies specifically. Sometimes I think experience means a lot. For example, I have a Masters degree with 6 years experience. Yet, I know some that have a Bachelors with 25 years experience. Guess who I go to for advice? Do I always follow it? No. Do I always agree with it? No. However, I do appreciate the fact that it is what they THINK I should do.

I think with any forum you will have to deal with this. I know some will think people are rude, bullying, aggressive, etc. while others will see it as helpful advice. It is just all about opinions.

Admin stays on top of the post and does handle any problems that occur. Rest assured that if there is an issue it will be taken care of. However, also keep in mind that they do understand that everyone has their own opinions.

To me, I think the OP participated in bullying by threatening to reports comments she considered to be rude or nasty. Threats and trying to intimidate or to force someone to do or not do something out of fear of retaliation or reprisal, is the very definition of bullying. So far, that is the only bullying I have seen.

I for one have been guilty of reading the first couple of posts in a thread and responding without reading the following 350+ responses. That doesn't mean that someone is trying to make it sound like something it's not, just that things weren't clearly laid out in the first post.

Again, I want to know why it's ok to say some is being judgmental or calling someone a bully because you don't like what they posted. Isn't that being judgmental? Telling others how to word their posts so as not to offend YOUR sensibilities is exceedingly rude, IMO.

I moderate a board on a very controversial topic. Passions get inflammed and tempers flare. But never in that time has anyone EVER called someone else "mean" or a "bully" because they didn't like the "tone" in which something was written.

And I guess we did grow up in different worlds. My respect for people isn't dependent upon whether or not they respond in kind. I am grown up enough to let things go and realize that it's not all about me and my feelings.

I would love to see examples of what you consider bullying. Just copy paste them here, I'm sure those you consider to be "bullies" won't mind.

As I said in an earlier comment when I came across that thread the comment that lillymae had made about people being ignorant was already gone and I did not know that it had been there and removed and I apologized to megansmomma because of that.

I was most upset on my thread that someone said that I did NOT take the advice I was given by 2 or 3 vets/specialists and that was simply not true. When I spoke with the specialist she said she would not recommend any of the invasive procedures at this time because Lucy is doing well and her enzymes were normal and her BAT's were not elevated enough to indicate a shunt. When I put that statement on there it seemed that everyone was already done at that point and stopped and that's fine...it is too long and needs to be closed anyway but I don't like it when I am accused of not taking advice from my vet and specialist but rather advice from someone PM'ing me...that again is simply not true!

I am not calling you a bully at all and I really am not saying anyone specifically is a bully I am just trying to say that sometimes the comments go a little too far and it comes off as bullying.

I know you don't agree with what I am doing with Lucy but you have been very respectful and supportive I agree!!

Not all of you left the thread peacefully though there were a couple of comments from a couple of people that were condescending at the end and they got their last words in and then left which I thought was not fair because they said things again that were not true.

This makes sense and I agree but I am still happy that I posted this because it made me realize things and yet again I have learned something....one is to become a little more thick skinned!! :)

I have to say this is the first of this type of forum I have ever been on and I have learned many lessons and met a lot of wonderful people and I thank you for your comment!!

Can you give me an example of what you are referring to?

I have come to the conclusion that I probably should not have said bullying but rather rude/rudeness....

I don't have time right now but tonight or tomorrow I will definitely post them so you can see what I am talking about.

Will you please come out from under that chair :rolleyes:

When you had talked to the specialist and listed the options, it DID sound like they were recommending the first one. That is what the person who posted about not listening to two vets was pulling from. Now that we know that isn't the case, perhaps she would have worded it differently. However, that still doesn't mean that just doing blood testing is okay. It's absolutely fine to listen to your vets. That said, I've met and heard about a huge number of vets that don't always do or recommend the right thing. The vets you go to are totally your choice. I'd suggest a third opinion by a board certified internal medicine specialist because I think these doctors are missing something. But of course what you do is up to you. If the bile acids go down, great. They may need to be watched for awhile though. If they only go down slightly or go up, then that's another month of possible damage to the liver (because it has already been a month). That's all.

It is incredibly concerning to see some of the stuff posted in the ER section and think about what is talked about in PMs. To each their own, but some of us will caution others to be very careful. That is not being condescending. That is wanting your dog to be safe.

:lol tearsThey might just keep your prizes from the raffle.

Uh Oh she is going to miss the raffle.

To the OP let me begin by welcoming you to YT. And to further say I've read through this entire thread and understand what you are saying, at times some of us do become overly passionate in our opinions/beliefs, etc. However, that being said there is a thread that I try to recommend for all newbies to read.

http://www.yorkietalk.com/forums/gen...d-respect.html

Again welcome and hope that you'll stick around.