Originally Posted by Deadbug (Post 3920526)

If you foster a dog for a week, would you buy it some bowls to eat out of or dump the food on the floor? You have no idea what this lady's intentions were and I don't think it's respectable to jump to conclusions like that. Especially when nothing more can be done for the dog.

It would be nice to see a little more support around here and a little less condemning.

I know everyone thinks I'm new, but trust me, I'm not. I had an account on here a few years back when I was in my researching phase of getting a yorkie. I didn't post much, but I did make some friends behind the scenes. One of those friends was bullied to death by some of members of this forum. (gosh she couldn't have been more than maybe 25)

What do I mean by "to death?"
I mean several members here pushed this young gal into doing what they thought was "the right thing to do". There was a bit of a financial loss involved in her doing what everyone was so convinced was "right". About $3000 if I recall correctly. (I'm getting old).
Long story short, this "right thing to do" spiraled this gal's life out of control. Her husband left her over this decision (mind you - after he had beaten her) and took their children with him. What happened you asked? She killed herself. The stress and the tension mounted to a point where she couldn't handle it and she took her own life. All because of a dog and everyone else's perception of "the right thing to do".

So just because you think something is the "right thing to do" doesn't mean it's the right thing for them to do. You have no knowledge of extenuating circumstances that may have a greater impact. We try to do what's right for the dog, but in the end, we must do what's right for us first.

So forgive me for busting your chops, Taylor. I do not mean to offend you in any form. But when I come here and read the knee jerk reactions you've delivered people over the past few days, who have come here asking for help, it reminds me of this situation and what happened. A situation that could have been prevented had some people shown a little more understanding.

OP: I'm sure you did all you could do. Thank you for being selfless enough to take the little dog to a vet.

Originally Posted by Lovetodream88 (Post 3920835)

It is no one else's fault when some one kills them self and its not fair to say it is. I am 24 I have been there I attempted suicide twice when I was 13 and I self injured myself for many years as well as was diagnosed with depression at 8 but its was no ones fault persay when I attempted suicide or injured myself it was the chemicals in my brain as well as my low self esteem and other things not any ones fault. This may not be right but I care for dogs probably more then people they love you even when you treat them like crap and they forgive unlike people. Many times I have been hurt by people but never a dog. My best friend when I was having such a hard time was a lab mix she never gave up on me and never saw the bad in me. I have nothing in my life but my dog and other dogs that I will fight for. What is right is whats right not matter the circumstances and this dog I believe was a lot sicker then it came of that she was and might could have been saved if taken to the vet early and that is a big deal. If you pick up a dog on the side of the road or any where it does need to go to the vet right away or give it to a rescue (rescues care). If I picked up a dog on the street and it had no tag first stop would be the vet to one scan for a chip and two to make sure its not ill or going to give my dog anything and three that is not in some kind of pain. Everyone makes there own choices and to say this board made a women so upset she killed her self is wrong and untrue. I think some people tend to take what I say out of the way its said one because I tend to say things that are to the point and I think after they do that they put it in there mind I am a bad person and I am not and you do not know me enough to judge me and how I am by a few things typed on a message board. I am a good person and I have a lot of information on dogs some I have learned here or other places and some I know from personal experiences and its worth just as much as anyone else's. If you don't like it here you don't have to be here or read anything that's here its a choice and I have helped many people.

Originally Posted by Wylie's Mom (Post 3920852)

Taylor, I think it takes a tremendous amount of courage to share your story. I'm so glad you had the chance to keep fighting for your life, and that you aren't giving up. It's very true that so many people don't understand suicide. I always hope that positive things can come of discussing it, whenever and however the subject comes up. A good friend of mine attempted suicide at age 28, and luckily, she too is still here fighting to stay well and to get her life back.

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I realize there are people who are upset about Deadbug's post; it's understandable. I think it can have a positive influence if we understand that the member who took her life, did so NOT because of one single solitary thing in her life (ie, her dog, or YT). When people take their lives, it's much, much more complicated than this. This person clearly had a very troubled marriage, domestic abuse, fear, anger, felt 'bullied' (whether she was or not, she felt that way)....and all of those things resulted in a tragic unraveling in her personal life.

Deadbug - I think the part of your post that bothered me a bit was this sentence: "All because of a dog and everyone else's perception of "the right thing to do"." -- that's the part that I think puts too much onus in one area of her life. Her situation with her dog wasn't the sole cause of all the pain in her life, and wasn't the sole cause of her death. Rather, it was one piece of a puzzle...and none of us know just how many other pieces there were to that puzzle.

It's a tough subject, without a doubt. But, it is indeed true that people can be fragile, people can be at the end of their rope...and even though it's not our job to 'save' them, it is our job to know that our words can DEEPLY affect people, at all times.

Originally Posted by courtney1121 (Post 3920935)

Personally I'm not convinced that they really tried hard enough but whatever, I don't know them, doesn't matter what I think, and am just going off of what this person posted so maybe they did more, who knows.

Sorry for your loss!

Originally Posted by Deadbug (Post 3920937)

I didn't mean to imply that it was the cause, and it certainly wasn't said to make an argument erupt. But it was a contributing factor in the downward spiral that caused her to make such a decision. I can't see me ever in a position where I would entertain that, but I'm not as delicate as she was. There's a lot to that story that you don't know.

Fact is, we all love our dogs or we wouldn't insist on socializing with others who also love their dogs. That is our common ground. Those fluffy, rambunctious, stubborn, yet loving furballs. And we all want what's best for every one of them. But we don't have to be mean, nasty or hateful to articulate our point, do we? I don't see where it's necessary to hurt someone because they're limited in what they're able to do. This woman wasn't prepared for a dog to come into her life. It just happened. Has it ever happened to you? It doesn't mean she should be crucified for not spending $$$$'s on a dog she only knew for a few days. She did something. That's more than a lot of people would have done.

Originally Posted by ladyjane (Post 3921005)

Taylor was not mean...not nasty. She was right in asking the questions that she asked throughout this thread......and just as right in her frustration. I avoided it for reasons not to be posted here but I found it extremely frustrating. I felt sorry for the pup and for the owner if he/she was looking for her.
This thread needs to die imho. The way I see this, questioning people who truly were giving good suggestions is pointless and argumentative at this point. I don't see what can be gained.

Originally Posted by ladyjane (Post 3921005)

Taylor was not mean...not nasty. She was right in asking the questions that she asked throughout this thread......and just as right in her frustration. I avoided it for reasons not to be posted here but I found it extremely frustrating. I felt sorry for the pup and for the owner if he/she was looking for her.
This thread needs to die imho. The way I see this, questioning people who truly were giving good suggestions is pointless and argumentative at this point. I don't see what can be gained.

Originally Posted by courtney1121 (Post 3921115)

:thumbup::thumbup::thumbup::thumbup: Agreed. I probably would have asked the same questions she did if I seen this earlier. Hopefully this puppy can find peace now and pray that the original owner will eventually find peace too.

RIP little puppy! :rbyorkie: