At first I was humiliated, but now I am just MAD
 

Friday I found myself back at the dr's office. Relapse of the same upper resp/bronchitis crap that I've had on and off again for 2 months. :(

So anyway, when I was called back the nurse did the standard temp/blood pressure/weight thing. When she was writing my weight down she said, "Wow, you're a porker aren't you?" WTF???? What makes me even madder is that I didn't call her on it right then. I just smiled politely and told her I'd had a rough year and half. I even APOLOGIZED to HER for my being so fat. :(

I waited until I was in the room and she walked out and closed the door before I started to cry. When the dr came in I still didn't say anything about it. I just told him I was crying because I didn't feel good and I was tired and frustrated and just wanted to get well once and for all - which was partially true.

What kind of nurse says that to someone? WTF was she thinking? I mean she wasn't exactly thin herself. I'd say she was a little above average. She was at the very least a size 12-14.

I LOVE my doctor, but honestly, I just don't think I want to go back to his office again. I just don't feel like I can show my face there again after being so embarrassed.

I KNOW I have gained a LOT of weight in the past 18 months. Its been a combination of surgeries/medications/depression/inability to exercise.

Now I am just angry. I am angry at her for saying it and I am angry at myself for letting her get away with it. :mad:

OMG! As an overweight female myself, I'm PO'd for you! I'd have to tell the Dr what she said even if I had to leave a message for him to call you back! He needs to know how patients are being treated.

I've gone thru the same weight gain thing since my husband died and I don't need anyone to tell me about it. I have mirrors and a closet full of clothes I can't get into anymore. The nerve of that heifer!

Omg what an awful thing for anyone to say, let alone a nurse who is suppose to be compasinate to you, I wuld of told the doctor what she said, that is totally uncalled for, Iam sorry you are not feeling well, hopeyou find a different doc and feel better soon, Iam peed right along with you:thumbdown hugs and prayers to you:hug:

WOW!....Don't you just hate it when some one is so in your face rude that it catches you so off guard that your stunned into silence and later on after you recover it's to late .....

I don't blame you for being mad/furious, that was so unprofessional of her....I can't believe that people think they can say whatever they want to another person like that, our society is in such a mess....

I would call the office and speak with the doctor about it....

I hope you feel better soon...

OMG...that is totally out of line. :mad: :thumbdown I like to think that if I were in the same situation that I'd let her have it, but I can imagine being caught off guard like that.

You have nothing to apologize for. It's none of her damn business! Don't feel bad about yourself for another moment! I'm sure you are far more beautiful than she could ever be even if she were a size 2!!

I would have said something to the doctor about it. I know how frustrating it can be to gain weight. I have gained this yr and after the holidays I am going on a strict diet. I am so unhappy with the extra weight and I have always been a small person

Thanks, ya'll. I was a little afraid I was overreacting. I think I will call and talk to the dr in the morning. I talked to my grandmother (who has been an RN for over 30 years) and she said what that nurse said was both unethical and unprofessional and she should absolutely be reported. Then she told me I should use what she said as incentive to lose weight. :rolleyes:

I've always been tiny too. I'm barely 5'4" and my weight has always stayed between 95 and 100 pounds. I've put on a good 70 pounds since last June.

Your grandmother is right-you do need to report this, and make sure your voice is heard! You don't want another lady to have to go through this the next time they're at the doctor, so use your "Steam" to make sure this doesn't happen to someone else! See? In the end-it's a POSITIVE, because you might have just helped someone else!!! :D

Wow I'd actually go back up there in person and demand to see the doctor and tell him what happened. What she said was so rude! Even if she needed to make you aware of your weight gain (which I don't think she did) she should have said it in a professional and non-embarrasing way...not using the word "porker". I can't believe that happened...so rude. I'd definitely make a huge fuss about it now. Just let them know you were so embarrassed at the time that you were just speechless and had no idea what to say - you just wanted to get out of there. I'd actually want to go back up there and not only talk to the doctor in person but tell that nurse exactly what I thought about her as well! :mad:

You're right-as a healthcare provider, if she felt she needed to say something, she could have worded it differently, saying something like, "Ok, your weight is XXX-that's up a bit from last time, and I'll make a note of it because the doctor will want to watch it closely" or something...but I think that's really up to the DOCTOR, not the weight/temp/blood pressure nurse!

I cant believe she said that! It was very rude and she should be reported! Im sorry she made you feel bad, I too struggle with my weight so I understand how hurtful that must have been :-(
You are NOT a porker...we are just big boned! ;)

You have every right to be furious, and that woman must be reported. If she said that as casually as she did to you, who knows how many others she's said similar things to?

If you don't want to talk about it with your doctor because of embarrassment, write a letter. Make sure you include the date and time of the appointment and all of the details you can remember. I find that written complaints are usually more effective in getting results anyway. They can't be ignored as easily.

Also, many doctors now have email addresses for non-emergency questions, so you might be able to email him.

No matter what you do, let the doctor know what happened so that it doesn't happen to anyone else. That was terribly wrong! :(

As far as I know "Porker" is not correct medical terminology....That nurse needs a thermometer put where the sun don't shine ;) ....

Oh, I'm so sorry this happened to you. I'm sure I wouldn't have said anything either because I never want to make waves and I probably would have been too embarrassed to say anything in person. To me it's easier to handle these types of things over the phone. Good luck. "Fat" and any other word that implies it are considered bad words in my house. My BIL thinks that I'm censoring my kids and he makes sure to say all of the "bad words" when he's over. :mad: I'm proud of my girls though, they've never intentionally hurt anyone's feelings and I've never had to be embarrassed in public by them asking why someone's so fat. Sounds like this nurse needs to go to manners school. I'm sure your doctor has no idea how she treats people and he's probably lost patients before due to her rude behavior. Her comments could lead some people to eating disorders or even suicide if they have low enough self-esteem. She definitely needs to find a new job.

Why dont you call the Dr and let him know what happened? Give him a chance to handle it and also demand an appology from her. Give it a few days and if she still works there then change dr's and be sure to voice your opinion. I am a CNA and in my last year of nursing school. If me or anyone I work with would ever say anything demeaning like that to a patient we would be fired on the SPOT and it would go on the NC nurse registry as PATIENT ABUSE, cause that is exactly what it is.

She was totally off base, and I would call and talk with the doctor about it.

I am a RN and I am totally disgusted by this behavior. I would be really shocked if she was a nurse but a medical assistant. MA's have very little training. IN nursing, we learn to treat the entire person...mentally..physically..emotionally and spiritually.
I have had to make many visits in a short period of time to my doctors office because of an upper respiratory infection also. Once the MA said...YOU again..weren't you JUST here!!! I said yes I am here because the DOCTOR requested to see Me!!
I was recruited by one of my favorite doctors to run his infusion center and his main office. During the interview the office manager explained the trouble of keeping staff.. how they are not very educated and will go somewhere else for a nickle/hr more and HOW THEY TALK TO PTS. I said NO THANKS.
Granted I am sure there are many mature med assts in the world with great customer relations, however they are way out numbered by the bad ones.
Now before I jump off my soap box...let me just say I have travelled all over as a travel nurse and in 20 years I have only run in to one or two nurses that really just should have given it up!!
Bottom line.. and i apologize for being so long-winded...YOU HAVE TO TELL THE DOCTOR. Like I say to my patients when I handling a complaint "we can't fix it if we don't know there is a problem". I am sure this will not be the first time he has heard a complaint about her.. but may be the one that broke the camel's back...so to speak.
Chin up girl!

That was wrong, very wrong, I am sorry you had to go through that...she shouldn't have made a smart remark like that to you at all...:(

I would have told her off right away. But sometimes it doesn't hit you to talk back at them... then later on you regret. Has happened to me before.


I agree with most of the members, tell the doctor, so he can have a word with her rude ass.

How horrible is that??!!
 

Boy, was she out of line!!!! Hopefully that was an honest mistake and she just didnt think before she spoke. Bet that just made your day!!!! Wonder what she would say about me: "have a case of hippopotomitus"?LOL Well, hope you have a better day!!

Omg that is so mean! I hope you tell the doc, or someone in charge, she should be fired! No one should say that to anyone, let alone a nurse! How can she do that? Her job is to be nice to ppl and make them feel better not worse!:mad: I'm so sorry:(

weight
 

You should have burst into tears...seriously!!!
I did!!!
I went to a new Dr for a check up..she did all those tests and said I was fine..but I did need to lose weight. I said.."I would love to lose 50 pounds"..Dr said, "AT LEAST"...and gave me such a superior look. I sat down, put my head in my hands and faked such a good cry...the doctor felt like dirt! Apologized too!

Then I did the same thing at the dentist...for absoutely no reason the dental tech was outright nasty. The dentist noticed I was very quiet when he came in and asked if there was a problem...I was able to squease a real tear or two out..not hard when you think of the bill...long story short, the next week they were sooooooooooooo nice to me.
So I have decided to cry to get my way...! LOL

You were treated very unprofessionally and should let the DR know...

I'm new to the forum so forgive me for butting in where you might have a stronger support group but I just am floored that this person treated you in such a manner!

I'm a behavior therapist and when I was seeing clients, every female client I had for whatever reason she was coming to see me always had an underlying poor self-esteem issue and generally a body image issue. As a former anorexic, and "porker" myself having gone from 68 pounds to 172 pounds and then back to my present weight which is correct for my 4'9" frame I KNOW how hard it is to deal with body image and the last thing I would have been able to deal with is one of my medical professionals referring to me in such a manner!

I truly believe for the benefit of any other person that might have to interact with this individual you should speak to the Doctor. At the end of the day when you are purchasing health care, you are purchasing a product and you are a consumer. Therefore as a consumer you have rights. One of those is to receive a product that is not defective. In this case your experience was defective and you should get a refund for the defect! Or at least a letter of apology for poor customer service.

I hope that you are able to release this and find something positive from the experience.

I did cry. I just didn't let her see me and I didn't tell the doctor the whole truth about why I was crying. Then when I called my grandmother and told her I burst into that sobbing, hiccupping, snot everywhere kind of crying. It took her forever to figure out what I was trying to tell her. "You found out you're allergic to pork?" she said. lol :rolleyes:

I am going to call first thing in the morning and talk to the doctor.

Now that its all over and I am feeling slightly better I can think of a few things I could have popped off back at her - like that from the looks of her my porkiness much be contagious. At the same time though I don't think I'd want to hurt someone's feelings (not even hers) the way she hurt mine.

Whoa!! How horrible!!! (aurgh) I'm sorry that happened and I definitely think you should go up there to talk to them. Normally, calling doesn't seem to help in situations like this...it is always better in person (my opinion).
Don't you hate it that you don't think of something right then...right when it happens......I hate that, and that is the best time to do something about it!
Good luck when you call!

Im glad you are going to call the Doctor!! Please let us know what they say/do!!! I hope she gets at least a warning.. what nerve:mad:

She was so very wrong. I am sorry that someone in her profession is allowed to treat people like that. I had a nurse throw papers and vitamins at me when I was at the obgyn office once because she found out I smoked and this was in 1989 and I never went back. I did quit smoking after I found out I was pregnant but she had no right to treat me that way. The office was packed full of people, as I walked out I was ranting and raving at the top of my lungs about her behaviour. I put on a good show for the full waiting room. (I hope they lost a few patients that day) I too, have gained weght over the past couple of years and when I go to the dr's office, and they take me to the scale, I just laugh and tell them that I know I am overwieght and I am there for a different reason. Then I go to my room. My DR has a good sense of humor and just chuckles at me.

Anyway, I vote yes. You should speak with the DR about his helps behaviuor.

Please do report this. NO ONE should ever have to feel bad about themselves. I almost cried when I read this. Some people should be more considerate. She should be reprimanded if not suspended for a time. I would not tolerate that at all. I know at the time you just wanted to get out of the situation so I think your reaction was normal. I have had a bunch of those.... why didnt I say something at the time. God Bless You! I hope you are feeling better. My Mom has been dieting for some time now so I know the hurt and emotion that goes with weight gain. My son ask her why she swallowed a pillow.. I was MORTIFIED... now she has him as obsessed with her dieting as she is. He sees me eating something and he says MOM you dont need that much sugar!! GOOD LUCK..

ROFL....that's GOOOOD! But on the other hand, they were really mean to you, so they deserved to realize that they need to monitor what comes out of their mouths.

I've been an RN for over 30 years too and I cringed when you said what she said to you. I can't imagine any excuse for something so incredibly mean spirited to be said. And I would definitely make an appt with the dr. or call him and tell him what she said and how it made you feel. You don't go to a dr b/c you feel on top of the world to begin with; you're there b/c you DON'T feel good and the last thing you need is anyone; especially one of their staff, who are supposed to be "caring" for you, make you feel lousier than you did when you came in. Shame on that nurse; she needs to go back and read the "Nightingale Pledge" which is what she swore to on the day she graduated from Nursing School. Here's a copy of it if you want to print it out and hand it to her; sounds like she needs to carry it with her and read it every day before she goes into work:rolleyes: .

"I solemnly pledge myself before God and in the presence of this assembly, to pass my life in purity and to practice my profession faithfully. I will abstain from whatever is deleterious and mischievous, and will not take or knowingly administer any harmful drug. I will do all in my power to maintain and elevate the standard of my profession, and will hold in confidence all personal matters committed to my keeping and all family affairs coming to my knowledge in the practice of my calling. With loyalty will I endeavor to aid the physician, in his work, and devote myself to the welfare of those committed to my care. "


Note: of course, "passing one's life in purity" is subject to interpretation:p

I'm glad your going to call in the morning and speak to the doctor...the doctor should want to hear what you have to say, if this nurse is doing this to other patients then his office may suffer...ex. possible loss of clients, bad reputation for patient treatment, clients feeling uncomfortable, etc....

If this is a problem he should know....his reputation may be at stake...