Ever feel this way?
 

Ever feel like giving up? I feel this way right now. I'm just so tired of doing it all by myself. I'm tired of trying to raise 4 kids alone. I never thought my life would be this way. I'm so lonely and depressed with my husband being gone. I had to have surgery by myself and deal with 4 kids that don't respect or mind me by myself. (And the topper is those kids are mine not my husbands.) I just don't know where I went wrong. I just don't enjoy life or find any happiness anymore. I'm sorry for coming on here and moaning. I'm sure that that others have it far worse than me.

it doen'st matter "how much worse" someone else might have it. These are your problems and for you they are real and important. Have you talked to someone about this? Earlier this week someone posted something along these lines.. and the general responses were.. you can't do this alone... i'm a "kid" well 23.. but i live at home still.. and i know i haven't been perfect... but know that your kids love you more than you will ever know... how old are they? and if you were to leave them... they would be lost... even though they may never show you that... but you should think about seeing someone... i did... it helped me so much... i'm sure our "problems" differ from eachother.. but talking to someone was the smartest thing i could have done. we are here for you! :hug:

"God is great, but sometimes life ain’t good, and when I pray..it don’t always turn out like I think it should…but I do it anyway, I do it anyway" i'm not an overly religious person.. but i thought his might help :)

Saying a prayer for you
 

I wish I could give you a big hug. Some day those smart mouthed kids will show their love & respect. It is all worth it, just keep keeping on. We do appreciate your sacrifices and know that my words can't really help but God can. :)

I think you should talk to someone - or get involved with a support group. Is your husband in the military? It's just too hard these days to go it alone - you need some support. I hope you can find it!

Yes my husband is in the military... but we don't live on base or anything. My family all live in another state except my 1 sister and I don't have any friends around here. I'm just so lonely all the time.

How old are your kids....Girl I raised two by myself(my exhusband started another family didn't have time for ours) but it's really hard...especially if they are teenagers....I just know that something got into both of mine from the age or 14 to 18 a demon or body snatcher...:p because there is no way that they are my kids with there attitude and mouths...but it will get easier when they get older..Mine will be 22 and 21 and God help me but I wish they where back home and 14 &15 again....Hang in there, just vent all you need to and we will help....Way I see it, its the body snatchers against the moms...:p

Kitty

I hear you, and all of us listen.

Sleep a restful sleep.

My oldest is 11 and all of a sudden he has an attitude that won't end! I just really can't take him being so mean and hateful to his brothers and sister. And of course me. I have given up so much for him. His bio father left us when he was 4 mos. old and me pregnant with my second. (He's 10) Then I have a 7 year old boy that has behavioral problems that just don't end. It's a struggle everyday with that one. He's in the first grade and he's been kicked off the bus, banned from going on any and all feild trips. I spent most of the last school year at the school picking him up for one thing or another. He was kicked out of the first school he attended in Pre-kindergarten so we had to move to find another school. My daughter is 6. She's so sweet and kind but is learning her brothers behaviors. I just never planned on raising kids on my own. I love them don't get me wrong. My life evolves around them. I just have been so down lately and they don't help when they won't mind me. I've been running a high fever for the last 2 weeks due to an infection I got after my surgery. I'm now on the second course of antibiotics and am also taking blood pressure meds. I've never in my life had high blood pressure until recently. (I'm not that old either or over weight. I'm going to be 32 at the end of this month.) And then on top of it all I think I broke the puppy's leg tonight and am waiting on my vet to call me back. (I posted a thread under sick/emergency about it.) I wonder what else will happen tonight.:(

Do you know of anyone that will keep them for a night or a few hours, you need some time off, a little me time....try to find someone, or hire a babysitter....get out and go shopping or something....My heart goes out to you....:)

I'm so sorry you are going thru all this.... You will be in my praryers. I hope you feel better soon. Have you talk to your dr about these feeling? Best Wishes.

you need a sitter
 

Get a sitter and take the night off soak in a tub witha bottle of champange or window shop sit in the park look at the sky just take some time for yourself

I don't know anyone except my sister and she has been sick and she has 5 kids of her own. I have advertised looking for a sitter but I haven't found anyone.

Yes, I've talked with my doctor and she wants to put me on anti depressents but my insurance doesn't take effect until next month so we are waiting. She was nice enough to give me a 2 mo supply of the blood pressure meds from samples she had.

The saying God never puts no more on us than we can bear is true. Just keep holding on and asking him to give you the strength to make it and he will. We all have times in our lives where we feel like giving up. But we must not! First thing is to read a scripture in the bible and just meditate on it. Something that lifts you and encourage you. Make sure to take time and do things that you enjoy. If it is extra time to get a good book and lay in the tub and not move for a while do it. If it is going to the park and sitting on a bench and staring at the flowers just do it. Make time for yourself. It's important.

I will be praying and believing that God gives you the strength to hold on and meet all of your needs.

It's just that I feel that I've been fighting for my life my entire life and I'm so tired of doing it. I was born premature (3lbs.) I stayed in the hospital for the first month of my life in an incabator and with feeding tubes because I lost weight if I nursed. I've been through 2 abusive marriages and 1 very abusive relationship that put me in intensive care. I survived a car crash in January. (I don't know how the kids and I made it out of that one.) The only explanation I have for it is that good took the wheel and delivered us unharmed. My van flipped and we rolled several times before landing on the passanger side. It caught fire and we were trapped inside due to the fact I had the child saftey locks engaged and couldn't open the back door from the inside. Some how I found the strength to break the window and help the kids out. It was really peaceful during the whole wreck and that is how I know GOD was there. (I know my gaurdian angles have probably plucked all the feathers out of their wings by now. lol) I just wish every day wasn't such a big struggle.

Sometimes we have hard times to make us strong and to strenghthen others. You said yourself who have brought you through all of this. Now it's time to give thanks and praise him for what he has done and seek his face to find out what else he wants you to do. I was premature also as a child. I weighed 2 pounds and had to to have a lung operation. At age 5 I became diabetic and at age 39 God is still keeping me. One day when things take a turn for the better you will be there to tell someone else who is having a hard time they can make it. One thing about life we all are going to have hard times, but I'd rather have them with God (Jesus Christ) Than without him. I know that if I am holding his hand it is all going to work out for my good.

Your on this earth for a reason, you said it yourself, God has a purpose for everything...Times are hard right now for you, your husbands gone, your raising your kids without help right now, and you got a new puppy that has been keeping you up at night and now his leg might be broken, you have alot on you, but just take it day from day, it will get better....you have to let the past go and start from today, you have seen God's grace first hand, so just start taking it from there...Your just need to get a good nites sleep and some me time....I will be praying for you....:)

Thank you to all of you! I'm so sorry to bother you all with my ramblings. I am getting counciling from my pastor but sometimes I just feel alone. Even in a house full of kids, dogs, birds, fish, and oh yeah don't forget the two garden snails my daughter brought in crying they were cold and their mommy had left them. (they're really tiny) I know God is here for me and with me. I praise him everyday for the life he gives me. Just sometimes I wish it wasn't so hard. I know he never give more than you can handle but I am ready for a break. I know things will get better.

I hear your frustration... and it sounds like you are over whelmed with the puppy being hurt, your hubby being away, and the kids. When things get tough for me and I want to crawl under a rock, I ask the Lord to take the burden and carry it for me. He can give you a peace that no one else ever could. Your problems won't go away like magic, but he helps you through them, and deal with them, and you are not alone!

I'm sorry if I sound preachy, I just want you to remember you can lean on the Lord when your alone... And of course we are all here to listen too! God Bless...;)
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We are here for you...Thats what friends do, we listen and give advice, some good some not to good...but we are here...So just let us know....Hang in there girl, it will get better, you have to reach the bottom to go up...and I think its time for you to start going back up....:)

Hi Kitty, I'm pretty sure you said you or hubby were in the military. Well, I surely know where you are coming from being in a place where you don't know anyone and feel like you are all alone. You mentioned your pastor, When we were stationed in Japan for 7 years (can't get much further from family than that) We bacame VERY involved in our church. It helps put you in touch with other people and make friends. With a church family behind you you don't feel so alone. Also gives you people to fall back on, when you feel like you just can't do it anymore they will be there for friendship, meals, help with the kids etc...

My other thoughts for you are miltary centered. I havn't used them and don't what branch you are in but they all have family support groups that are there just for this type of reason. Please look them up and go talk to them.

Just out of curiosity, if you are miltary why do you need to wait for insurance to take effect?

I'm sorry if I have read incorrectly about you being military. If I'm way off on that than at least think about getting more involved in your church (when we were in Japan were there every time the doors were open and was made Japan feel like home.)

If you ever want to talk you are more than welcome to PM me. I sure hope you are feeling better soon.

Big hugs to you,
Kim

Sorry, double post

My husband is in the National Guard. He has another full time job on top of the Guard that he does. He switched jobs recently and had health insurance from his employer. The new empoyers insurance won't take effect until Dec. 1. I don't know why he chooses to have medical insurance through his employer instead of the Guard but that is his decision. I hope this helps explaine it a little better.

Oh honey, I have an 11 year old who sounds just like yours. He can be the sweetest kid(once in a blue moon) but he honestly has made me cry. The back talking is horrible. I think it's hormones. He calls me mean at least once a day(because he can't have a second can of pop, or play videogames till bedtime or I won't take his side if he hit his brother). I keep trying, that's all you can do. I tell him I'm trying to make him be a good person, that it's my job. Hopefully someday he'll realize it(but I'm thinking it's not going to be this year). He gets good grades and isn't rude outside of the home, just here.

Just wanted to share that with you so that you know it's not YOU. Kids can be trying. My husband works a lot, and it's hard to get mad because he works so hard but it feels like I do everything myself. I clean...a lot. I volunteered every Friday for a few years at our local school. I liked it. I'm not a people person and I'm a homebody. It's hard, I know, it's depressing too. I read to pull myself out of it. I like fiction and find it takes my mind off of things. Find a hobby you'll enjoy so that your mind won't worry all the time. It can be something silly like finding a fragrance you might like(sample everything), hunt for the perfect mascara, do puzzles or crosswords, take up a craft. Just remember, everyone feels down and you're not alone.

I will pray things get easier for you and for the strength the deal with all of this. You sound like a pretty strong person to handle all you have been. Maybe the doctor can give you sample meds for depression. Another thought is exercising it helps reduce stress even a brisk walk every day. Just know we are all here to listen.

Maybe the doctor can give you sample meds for depression.

HOw are you today Kitty?

Tired.........

Me too. Day hasnt really even started:eek:
I have a 2 and 4 yr old. It it very demanding. I also take care of my yorkies which is also very time consuming. SOme days I feel lucky, some days I feel overwhelmed and sooo tired, some days I feel like running down the road screaming! Many times I feel alone, even with company.
I have felt so exhausted there have been days I didnt think I could do one more task. I used to think I had to make a big dinner every night, but some days I do the soup and sandwich thing. The house would drive me crazy because I couldnt keep up with everything. I decided the house isnt so important. I have kids so it isnt going to be spotless or picked up all the time.
My husband works hard and he will help, but during the day when I feel the most frustration he is gone.
I know how hard it can be, just wanted you to know their are many of us out there who feel lonely or overwhelmed sometimes.
I dont get much free time either but it is really important to clear your head. Even if it means bundling up the kids and just going for a walk. Just a change in your surroundings can help give you a bit of relief.
Glad to see your pup is better and the leg is not broken!

Thanks! I think having the pup is helping me. I really enjoy my dogs. I love playing with them and grooming them. Today I think I will give Kitty a bath and total spa treatment. I think she may be feeling a little left out with the new pup and then with it being hurt it did get extra attention. I plan on having a great day even though I am tired and would really love to just go back to bed.lol:)