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Very VEry VERy VERY touch subject/situation....Only time will tell you the truth. If it does work out and he tends to be great....you still get the ex and their child....package deal. I wish you much happiness. |
As a person who has been mentally/physically abused I would definitely warn a new girlfriend if I had the chance. But I would also ask the girl if she wanted the warning as well. And trust me, I dated the man 7 years ago and I am happily married since then with a child. I am not a jealous person; I just would want any girl to know that the guy is mentally disturbed. I would be worried since he did say that she called the cops on him and she says he's been abusive in the past. I would definitely ask around if he has a history of domestic abuse for your safety. I don't exactly know you very well, but if you have children yourself, it is very important to find out the man's history and if he a criminal one before you let him around the kids. His family will ALWAYS be on his side, so I do not feel that they are the right people to ask. But you have to find out for yourself if you should take the advice from her or not. It is all in how she approached you. Did she come at you like she was seriously trying to help you? Or did she come at you like a jealous b*tch? I am also a little bit concerned about his reaction. Do you think he reacted that way because there are secrets he doesn't want you to know? But he could just be mad about his ex talking to you. I would definitely talk to him about his reaction, because from the way you spoke he did seem a little violent by storming into the bathroom and tearing you out instead of letting you handle it. Which you were doing just fine. Let him know that you are capable of making your own mind up and you all have to deal with each other civilly for his daughter's sake. If you are serious about this guy, I would also recommend some outings with the two of you and his daughter so she can develop her own opinion about you. Also, let her mother know if you DO or DO NOT want her opinions about her ex. I am really glad that you have found someone that makes you happy. I also wanted to let you know that people do change, so if you find out something bad about your man, it's not the end of the world. Take care of yourself and good luck! |
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The fact that you've met his parents and they are nice people is a good indication of how he is, Gina. My mom always told me to watch how a guy treats his mom and you'll have an idea of how he treats women in general. And how his dad treats his wife, too. Sounds too me like a 'crazy ex thang'... you know, the drama, the jealousy, the 'if-I-can't-have-him-nobody-can' sorta stuff. After that many years together, I'm sure she knows just how to push his buttons! If you ever run into her again, tell her that you know that they didn't get along, that you realize there are two sides to every story, but that you really want to stay out of it. Don't let her have the power to ruin it for you. |
Next time that she approches you, just tell her that she needs to keep her comments to herself. The past is the past. And you are both happy now. Some people just don't know how to let things go, and let others be happy. If you know he loves you, and you love her, than thats all that matters. I hope that she sees that her attempts have failed and lets it go. |
:hearts-en Lexi some people are sick minded ..sounds to me like she might be ,girl ya gotta trust your gut with this one .You are smart ,loving and lovable don't let anyone take that from you , including yourself ..Much lovenlight to you both ..Sometimes love brings up everything unlike itself ..for you to choose >>>>>choose love and youll be fine <<< :hearts-xx |
thankyou... you gals here make me feel so good.. appreciate it.. i know for sure that wasnt the end of it, there is more to come. |
Well dear that is bad that happened and I am sorry for you! But I had a similar problem with a girl my husband had a one night stand with when he was 16! She got pregnant and was totally in love with him! She to this day 8yrs later is still in love with him! All she does is say how much she hates him and everything to me, but then turns around and tells him on the phone when they were talking about there daughter that she would leave her husband if he would just say he wanted her! So maybe in someway this girl thinks that she can break you up and they will get back together! She may say she hates him, but it could be a front! Just tell her that the past is the past and he loves you and you don't want to hear what she has to say and then walk away! |
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