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01-15-2013, 07:55 PM | #1 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Hope Mills, NC, USA
Posts: 81
| Runaway friend? I know I haven't been on this forum long, but could really use some ears to talk to. The situation is as follows. A friend I went to high school with (we graduated in 2011) asked me to give her boyfriend and her a ride to SC, because they decided to take some time apart because they were questioning the relationship. I drove them three hours to his house, they said their goodbyes and as soon as we left his house she called another guy who was meeting us at a gas station. They said they were going to her house to hang out and she said her dad knew about it. He followed us back into NC, we stopped for gas and she asked if I knew my way home the rest of the way. I said yeah, because we were on a main road that lead straight to our hometown. I didn't see her past 3pm Monday. 7pm Tuesday (today) her mom called and asked if she could talk to her, that she wasn't answering her phone. I told her I hadn't seen her since yesterday. I told her everything I knew. She said that the girl had talked to her at 4:30/5 yesterday and she told her mom that she was riding with me and my mom paying bills. My mom was working all day yesterday, she's never even met her. I just don't know what to do. I feel bad, but her dad is being threatening saying if anything happens to her it's my head. I am trying to help, I know it must suck their daughter ran away, but I can't help it. She lied to me too. I just need advice I guess, I'm stressing out about it. I messaged her saying she needed to call me, but she hasn't replied and won't answer the phone.
__________________ Mommy to Pilot, born 12/18/12 |
Welcome Guest! | |
01-15-2013, 08:43 PM | #2 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Land of Oz
Posts: 4,289
| Yikes I have no advice to give but I pray your friend is safe granted she is not that great of a friend to put you in that spot
__________________ Alisha mommy to Guinness Stout 7 & Stella Artois 5 & Teagan 4 Guinness & Stella proud Teapot Club Members |
01-15-2013, 08:45 PM | #3 |
Donating YT Addict Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 6,982
| Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry you're in this situation...that's very unfair on your friend's dad to be doing that to you. I hope that your friend is OK. Please keep us updated!
__________________ Heather Zeus | Thalia |
01-15-2013, 08:52 PM | #4 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: Cleveland
Posts: 126
| It sucks to say but it sounds to me like you my have to hang up the phone and walk away from the situation. NONE of this is your fault, at the moment we know she is safe because she has contacted her parents. You need to seperate yourself from her and her parents. You dont need the stress of this situation ending badly since you had no fault in it.
__________________ Laina Cohen, "The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man's." Mark Twain |
01-15-2013, 09:00 PM | #5 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Toluca Lake, CA
Posts: 5,491
| I hope your friend is okay and remember you are not at fault. You were doing a friend a favor. She told lies to you and her parents. Do you have a phone number or a way to look up the boy who you dropped off first? He may know this other guy. Do you remember the station where you picked up the second guy? They may know who he is or at least have him on video camera. I hope you friend checks in soon.
__________________ CarolynBuster Brown "The happiest people don't have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything." |
01-15-2013, 09:03 PM | #6 |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Hope Mills, NC, USA
Posts: 81
| I know she went willingly, so I don't feel too bad as far as my involvement. I knew it was strange because at the gas station they were hugging and saying I love you. I thought that was messed up because she JUST broke up with the other guy the night before. I didn't say anything though, it's none of my business who she talks to, engages in relationships with, ect. I just feel crapped on for lack of a better word and she just thrusted me into the situation. I told her mom if they needed me, they have my number but that I'm refusing to talk to her father. Beyond a vague description, his car type and where I last saw her, I can't tell them anymore, so I don't know what they want from me, but if it were my child I can't say I'd just settle for "Okay that's all you can do" either.
__________________ Mommy to Pilot, born 12/18/12 |
01-15-2013, 09:04 PM | #7 | |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Hope Mills, NC, USA
Posts: 81
| Quote:
__________________ Mommy to Pilot, born 12/18/12 | |
01-15-2013, 09:07 PM | #8 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: FtWorth,TX,USA
Posts: 3,269
| This is not your fault,this person used you. You need to give every detail that you can to her parents and then step away. They need to find someone to check her computer if it is still there. The police can GPS her phone if it is a smart phone. I am so sorry! This is a tuff place for you to be. If she is over 18 I dont think that a missing persons report can be filed for 24? 48? hours. Security cameras at the gas station? This is a parents worse nightmare. |
01-15-2013, 09:09 PM | #9 | |
Senior Yorkie Talker Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Hope Mills, NC, USA
Posts: 81
| Quote:
__________________ Mommy to Pilot, born 12/18/12 | |
01-15-2013, 09:24 PM | #10 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: FtWorth,TX,USA
Posts: 3,269
| You are correct,the parents can trace the phone number and use that to find where this guy is from. Please try not to feel responsible. You were not privi to everything that she was up to. Remember that the parents are terrified for their child. Other people see her as an adult,but I can assure you that in her parents eyes,they still see their sweet child. If they call and are angry and being hateful,they are looking for someone to blame and you are not it. You did not help this person runaway because you wanted to,you were lied to. |
01-16-2013, 05:39 AM | #11 |
Donating YT 3000 Club Member | I am sorry you were put in this situation. Sometimes people do not realize what they do effects everyone around them. You are a good person. You did not know her plan. You were being a friend. Do not beat yourself up over this. You did right by saying to the mom I am here for you. (( big hug ))
__________________ Teri . . . Galen Jameson Frazier Seraphina Luna Rosencrantz, Saber Tooth Tiger, Pussy Willow Pandora Guildenstern |
01-16-2013, 06:46 AM | #12 |
YT 500 Club Member | Im 20 and I cant say I know how you feel but I am so sorry you have been put in this situation. My mom has always told me your true friends will never put you in a bad situation. Maybe its time to reevaluate yall friendship. Stay positive and keep your head up. You only did what all friends do and thats be there for your friend. Give the parents all the information you have and from there they have to do the rest. |
01-16-2013, 06:54 AM | #13 |
Donating YT Addict Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Oakland County MI
Posts: 6,190
| Like others have said it's not your fault, and if her parents feel the police need to be involved they will trace phone calls, you could try messaging her again as well as having anyone else that she was close to do so, kids that age might talk to a friend over a parent. I am not sure how involved your parents are but if you have a Dad close by I think that he should speak to the police, ask their advice about keeping this man away from you, if the police can not do anything then you Dad should tell this man, if he wants to talk with you again to go through him. At times like this you need your parents help and support or that of another responsible adult. Good luck and be sure to let us know what happens.
__________________ Lola my amazing little yorkie-pom Donna Last edited by DBlain; 01-16-2013 at 06:55 AM. |
01-16-2013, 06:58 AM | #14 |
♡Huey's Human♡ Donating Member Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Ringgold, Ga
Posts: 3,333
| She DID use you. Everyone is saying the best thing: give over what info you have, then cut yourself loose. Those using, life draining friends don't improve with age, they just worsen. At 19, you've probably got enough drama in your life without adding someone else's. Cut the link...be free. Of course, keep her in your prayers until she is found safely...I'm not that cold-hearted...I just seem to attract users and it has been a very hard lesson for me, but I had to learn it to keep (whats left of) my sanity. Remember, it isn't your fault, no matter what.
__________________ Huey's mom, Marilyn :When a day starts & ends with puppy kisses, I can handle anything that comes in between! Last edited by Marhcarter; 01-16-2013 at 06:59 AM. Reason: spelling correction |
01-16-2013, 10:30 AM | #15 |
Donating YT 1000 Club Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 10,534
| Im glad you gave her parents any info you had, I'm sure that will help them track her down. Not that you are responsible in any way, but you don't seem too concerned either, is this a good friend of yours? I'd get YOUR parents involved at this point to help you keep that girl's father away from you or from verbally threatening you. Tell your parents everything so they know and can help protect you also.
__________________ “Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz |
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